I need to VENT!

DeafSCUBA98

Active Member
Joined
Jun 23, 2003
Messages
4,649
Reaction score
2
Last month Around 2nd week of January.. i asked my child support officer When am i going to get the child support money from my ex-wife.

He said 3-5 weeks... and it's already past 5 weeks.. and I am Very UPSET.. i really need the money to pay for diapers, clothes, food, etc.etc.etc.etc...

I asked my ex-wife if they have took the money out of her paycheck she said no... I am getting ANGERY!!! I NEED MONEY i'm B R O K E...

Right now i have no clue what to say to child support officer... i dunno if i should call them and ask them when am i getting the money? when WHEN!!!
or should i wait a few more weeks?

I'm starting to get no paitent... since i'm waiting since DEC 2003... child support officer said money will come... then i asked again 2nd week of JAN.. they said 3-5 weeks... now WHERE IS IT!! and they havn't even take the money out of her paychek YET!.. WHERE! and WHEN!

:mad2: :mad2: :mad2:
 
I think you should call the child support people again. And don't take their crap about waiting some more.. and tell them that you have communicated with your ex-wife as well, and that she mentioned that she hasn't noted any money being withheld from her paycheck for the support.
 
DeafSCUBA98, I know How you are feeling believe me I went through the same Phrase you are going through right now I have been waiting for Child support for 6 long years and I only got 1,200.00 and the father still owes 10,000.00 since Birth. I suggest you to go down to the office and amend them to tell u exactly what day you will get ur check. Have the Court ordered Child support pay out to you in the amount you are getting do you know how much u are supposed to be receive from your ex wife? if so it shouldn't have took long. Unless she is working under the table like my son's father is?
 
I thought there is a law that forces deadbeat parents to pay from their paycheck, tax returns and/or SSI benefits?
 
Deaf258 said:
I thought there is a law that forces deadbeat parents to pay from their paycheck, tax returns and/or SSI benefits?


Yes, that depends if they are working under table not much they can do about it but they did suspended my Son's Father Driver Licensee so if he get pulls over for anything he will be going to jail and he cannot be release until he pay the 10 percent of child support. And the bad thing is he never filed his income taxes. Grrr. But his retirement money that he had from another job goes to me.
 
DeafScuba

Is there a way you can find out what is going on with DFS? Call them or what?

DD
 
DeafScuba, I wonder have you gone to court and did made the agreement court orders? If yes.. then bring this document and proof to the agency of child support office. You have to rights tell'em and READ THE DOCUMENT has made court ordered and agreement which "must" pay the child support every bi-wks or monthly whatever depends on your court orders.
Um, Whatever if Agency of Child support office refused to make any kind action.. then you have to rights speak it out with your lawyer and file complaint againist the agency which is the poor processing. Which you have not get any cents since Dec til now. You have to rights make action.
I think Is that correct for you brings out of your vent!
 
**Huggs**..
I have been there when i was single for almost 7 years with 4 kids.. my 2nd ex never pays at all even house pymt or food or anything.. I got some help from the MFIP.. but now I dont since I have my man.. he works and supports all of us..
Anyway..
I can help you to go through this, since you live in MN... I know I hate to apply MFIP.. but for temporary that what i did.. since your ex wife didnt do anything..
If really emergency.. need diapers.. I have pently, I could give you and wipes that should last 1 1/2 weeks. size 5..
But...MFIP wouldnt do anything with diapers/wipes.. etc.. but i have list of need to call somewhere that provide your needs for temporary.. If you are interested.. IM me or email me that i already sent you in PM.. :)
Hang in there.. think positive .. it will come in blessings.
 
MsGiglz said:
**Huggs**..
I have been there when i was single for almost 7 years with 4 kids.. my 2nd ex never pays at all even house pymt or food or anything.. I got some help from the MFIP.. but now I dont since I have my man.. he works and supports all of us..
Anyway..
I can help you to go through this, since you live in MN... I know I hate to apply MFIP.. but for temporary that what i did.. since your ex wife didnt do anything..
If really emergency.. need diapers.. I have pently, I could give you and wipes that should last 1 1/2 weeks. size 5..
But...MFIP wouldnt do anything with diapers/wipes.. etc.. but i have list of need to call somewhere that provide your needs for temporary.. If you are interested.. IM me or email me that i already sent you in PM.. :)
Hang in there.. think positive .. it will come in blessings.

I am impressed by your kindness shown to another fellow human being even if you might not have met each other in person, Ms Giglz. :ily:

DS, I hope the legal and financial situation gets better for you and your household. I understand what you are saying about the financial issue, and my heart goes out to you.
 
Cheri said:
Yes, that depends if they are working under table not much they can do about it but they did suspended my Son's Father Driver Licensee so if he get pulls over for anything he will be going to jail and he cannot be release until he pay the 10 percent of child support. And the bad thing is he never filed his income taxes. Grrr. But his retirement money that he had from another job goes to me.
:shock: whaaaat? your ex never filed his income taxes? its against the law! so report him! sheeeesh! no fair to us that DO pay our taxes! and another thing, if fathers dont pay child support, they get him and put him in jail if he dont pay up! I know a lady (ASL interpreter) was divorced a long time ago when her kids were little, he ran out of state and never paid child support so when the law changed and says if you find him, he is obligated to pay her back child support!! her kids are now grown but he had to pay her back which amounted to a lot of money..he had to sell his 3 cars, a boat and other stuff to pay her back!!!! (she found him in Missouri thru internet!) i dont know about the laws in your state so check it out.
 
Hey DeafScuba..i feel for ya..You should contact your exwife and make her give you some money for the kids!! really! your kids should not have to suffer at all! Contact your lawyer or her lawyer and tell them your situation! that you are desperate as you are trying to feed and clothe your kids..sheesh! God bless you and hope things will turn out good for you in the long run!
 
DS.. ahh! I was in hurry this morning and I mistyped.. the diapers size are 4.. not 5.. lol.. (hope your son wears them) hehe

Well .. I have to say this.. Welcome to Minnesota.. the systems are slow!.. Like you said .. "Last month Around 2nd week of January.. I asked my child support officer When am I going to get the child support money from my ex-wife. He said 3-5 weeks... and it's already past 5 weeks.." well, its depends on YOUR ex-wife & work & child support system process...

For example.. child support system.. overlook your file within 3-5 weeks then finally sent out to ex's work to take off the paycheck... ex's work get the mail.. mgr put it aside till they have *time* for it.. (estimate) 1-2 weeks, finally mgr open.. *read*, take out your ex wife's file and put letter in it and put on file basket at their financial dept.. takes up to 1 wk.. after the financial officer finish fill out the forms and input info for ex 's paycheck roll, put in file and pass to mgr for final approve to sign.. takes other 1 week..
(already 2 months and 1 wk).. finally mgr sent out...
sent back to child support system.. they open the mail but put it on the pile for the officer to review.. takes 1 week.. (dont forget how many people are applying also).. after officer review all the info comes together then sent out to financial dept.. to process the check.. then sent back to officer to final approval plus sent out letter to you to info that your check is on way in couple MORE weeks..
BUT BUT BUT..
Depends on ex's work process.. sometimes, mgr will call ex to discuss about the child support.. if she want to waive it then mgr wont sign.. then child support officer have to sent summon to MGR.. its by law.. and prove papers that she suppose to pay child support to you.. Blah blah.. then mgr will accept and sign etc etc all through bs process..

well I applied child support in 1997.. finally got checks 2001 direct by ex.. pffth... why its take so long because he waived and he moved around.. had move other job too.. he had lawyer and said he will pay direct to me.. (went court for that too) but i dont get the checks on time or montly.. sometimes every other two or three months.. so i applied and notify the child support officer that ex didnt pay full price and on time.. you know what they said.. redo to apply the applications.. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! so i hope your ex is cooperative!!!

so the estimate (*with your ex cooperative*).. average between 3-5 months.. I know.. ::pulling hair::

Other thing.. you can apply your son ssi.. or ss?

Other thing.. hints/savings $.. get member at Sam's club.. diapers are only 23.65 (i think).. for size 4 and 168 diapers (brand is smiles).. and wipes are only less 12 dollars for 7 contains (88 count each).. (brand is natural choice)
Cereal.. look at the ounce in per box which is more with less price.. take it.. (either frost flakes and raisin bran).. I am sorry i dont give sweet cereal to kids only special times cuz of budget limit... some private family owned stores have special on milk like 2 for $5... (there's one near here..) save almost $2..

WHAT'S MORE------- like Defee said.. ex should help you some once in while too if emergency... if not.. ask your family to see if can help you some too and repay in some way (do their chores).. I know but good luck with you..

Liza.. :) thanks.. i could help if they are in that situation like that.. cuz you wont get child support within 3-5 wks.. probably 3-5 months or years like me..
 
DeafScuba -- i uddy how u are feeling and that totally sucks!!!! hang in there! *huggies*

Annie -- bless ur heart!!!!! as always u are so good to others and give sound advices, explain the MN system very well along with giving what u dont need to help out a bit -- :ily: Annie u definately have so much kindness like Liza has mentioned

Liza -- that is VERY MsGiglz!!!! shes always like that -- been honored to have known her since 1997 and yes have met IRL over the years :D

:thumb: Annie and hang in there DeafScuba -- things will pay off in due time!
 
Fly Free said:
DeafScuba -- i uddy how u are feeling and that totally sucks!!!! hang in there! *huggies*

Annie -- bless ur heart!!!!! as always u are so good to others and give sound advices, explain the MN system very well along with giving what u dont need to help out a bit -- :ily: Annie u definately have so much kindness like Liza has mentioned

Liza -- that is VERY MsGiglz!!!! shes always like that -- been honored to have known her since 1997 and yes have met IRL over the years :D

:thumb: Annie and hang in there DeafScuba -- things will pay off in due time!

:thumb: :thumb: :thumb: :thumb:

Thank you for the explanation, Fly Free - way coooool! It does a heart good to know there are fantastic people out there. Sometimes I do forget that in all the light of recent events. We definitely need a Ms Giglz to remind us now and then. :Oops:
 
My husband adopted my two children age 10 and 6 half yrs old... They are very happy with my husband. they dont even consider thinking their father as their dad and/or role dad.. because My husband is always there..

As for child support. Cheri is right about under table they can't do anything since under table not a proof of incomes! the state (child support) each state various on what they can do with how much of oweing.. some state with Child support agency can go after deadbeat dad/mom if the income was owed MORE than 10 Grands or 15 grands or so... In my state I think 10 grands.. the Judge put my ex in jail for not paying child support that was 8 grands something and 5 days in jail.. it was just to give my ex a warning Pay it or you be in jail longer...

So check with your state and find out what their limited on deadbeat mom/dad incomes if not paying..

But diaper, foods etc check with welfare I guess, and like MsGirlz gave you some advices with agencies..
In mass we do have what they calls babycenter they could help out for up to 1 year old for diapers, wipes, some stuffs like cribs or carseat or so see if they have that in your state... also you could check with WIC ( women, Infants, children) for Milk, cheese, juice, eggs If you don't have that one since you are in Full custody with your son and your son is qualifed for wic up to 5 years.. so Good Luck again.. again good luck.. I feel sorry for you about the child support.. I do agree that it sucks with state rules/policy on how they run it with child support.. I dont have to worry about mine anymore because my husband adopted my two kids and My ex doesn't need to know whats going on or pay it etc cuz I don't need his crap anymore.


Wendy
 
Also Worth try use Food bank.. there have provide some diapers and rest other foods too..
 
Liza said:
:thumb: :thumb: :thumb: :thumb:

Thank you for the explanation, Fly Free - way coooool! It does a heart good to know there are fantastic people out there. Sometimes I do forget that in all the light of recent events. We definitely need a Ms Giglz to remind us now and then. :Oops:

anytime Liza!!!!!! yes i agree we definately would need a MsGiglz every now and then!!! :D it does indeed do a heart good to know of great people out there in situations of seemingly total despair! :thumb:
 
Shit....that is one sad story, but scuba, hang on and fight the bureaucracy to get what u deserves for the kid.

However me and the wife is having problems trying to collect child care subsidies from me stepdaughter's daddy. He pays the child support regularly on time that is a good thing.......

Can y'all believe we pay 90 bucks a week for daycare on stepdaughter and trying to get reimbursed for it from her daddy. *drag foot on the daycare subsidies grrr* What really saves our bacon was the child care expenses were reimbursed by the tax refund added on it.

Bureaucrats can be a real PITA when it comes to things like that.
 
Back
Top