Work... (has some cussing, lots of anger, just a warning)

pinkster

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I don't know if this belongs in the ADA threads or debate.. But I just seriously need to vent. :( I know what she did is unethical, so don't tell me that. :P But I seriously cant take more of this..

Friday morning the general manager (GM) bickered with me from the moment I walked in the door. All she wanted to do is push me around and make me feel little. I told her I needed to check emails because that’s what mail order does, reply to the emails and whatnot. She took forever and did all the things I was supposed to do, which ticked me off. And she was like; well that’s part of my job. And I told her its part of mine because that’s what mail order does, and she said "well I'm here almost every day." I said SO? "Well you're here every other day.” SO?? She kept repeating that to me and I was like, I get it but there's no point in telling me. She's all like "Do you understand me???" I just said whatever, and walked away...

Fast forward 2 hours... I was feeling woozy; my blood sugar dropped so I ate some cottage cheese and washed out my plastic container. She came up behind me and asked me if I was on break, I said not really, I'm just cleaning up something I saw, I didn’t want someone to knock it over. She said "well you need to do mail order. You need to do it now." And that bothered me, how she was pushing me and telling me what to do. So thinking back to what Shayna said, be assertive... I told the GM I didn’t appreciate her telling me what to do. (I meant to say I didn’t appreciate her telling me what to do, the way she’s doing it.) And she went off on me. The last thing I remember her saying is "I'm your BOSS!!!" I was like "pshh.. " and I raised my arms and walked out the break room door.

She followed me and yelled at me on the sales floor, "GET OVER HERE NOW! I'M ABOUT TO SEND YOU HOME RIGHT NOW!" Right on the floor! With like 4-5 customers out there! A customer asked Shayna a question so we were all standing there and Shayna looked at me like "oh shit you're in trouble aren’t you" and after the lady was finished talked, I tried to get out of the whole GM thing, but she yelled at me again and said "GET OVER HERE RIGHT NOW I'M NOT DONE TALKING TO YOU! YOU BETTER GET OVER HERE!" And I said "We'll talk about it later, LATER!" "NO, YOU BETTER GET OVER HERE RIGHT THIS MINUTE!!!" With that, she walked away and into the back office. Like any loyal employee would do, I followed her. She proceeded to stomp through the store and into the back office. There she started yelling at me saying she didn’t appreciate the way I was acting, or my attitude. But she was YELLING at me, screaming! I could hear her! I told her to stop yelling at me and that I didn’t like it that she was yelling. But she kept yelling and screaming at me. She said the owner said I have a nasty attitude and she's "feeling it right now." She told me we have to get all the ups stuff out before UPS comes, and how many orders had I done? (one) SEE! EXACTLY! WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING? (emailing people about their orders) WELL THATS A WASTE OF TIME, YOU NEED TO BE DOING MAIL ORDERS AND GETTING THEM OUT BEFORE UPS COMES BECAUSE MAIL ORDER IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING ELSE! (uhm ok whatever, fine..) She threatened to write me up, and I said "I’d like to see your reason for writing me up." WELL I"LL WRITE YOU UP RIGHT NOW THEN!! She went on and on about how she expects me to finish all the orders (6-7) before UPS comes and that she was going to take mail order away from me. She told me "if you cannot prioritize your duties, then I will prioritize for you." And I simply laughed. My birth mother told me the exact same words, and 6 months later I moved out. I refuse to be controlled. And so she kept going on and on and said the packages must go out with today's UPS, and so I said "why are you still talking to me then? Are you done? Why??" And she's like, "IM DONE WHEN I'M DONE, NOT WHEN YOU THINK I AM!" A couple of rants later she said "I'm done, leave, go." And proceeded to follow me out the office and into the store.

I sat down at the mail order computer, shaking, and finally I cried. I was so upset. SO VERY upset. The weekend went by without incident.. But then Monday morning I got a letter from the owner, who simply points out all my faults from the fight, since the GM wrote him a long letter. The key to all of this is one paragraph -

If you wish to continue working at ********** then there will need to be serious changes on your part with your attitude and you will need to follow all direction given to you from the GM or myself. Failure to do so will result in termination. Without notice if necessary.

It’s not completely accurate but close enough. I have the letter somewhere. It might be at home. But it was 2 pages long, and he wants to fire me OH SO BAD and is waiting for me to fuck up. I also have to have a meeting with the GM, a "formal" meeting. Where she's going to lecture me more, and show me the write up she did on me.

Needless to say, I'm quitting. My resignation letter is going to be SO pretty. I'm going to start it out as, thank you for letting me know what my faults are. Here are yours. (I'll list all the things he did wrong with me, from not allowing me to move up on the manager scale, to discrimination against my deafness.) And the end of it will say, "With that, I willingly and positively hand in my resignation."

I can’t wait. I CANT WAIT.
 
I know that feeling cuz I went thru the same thing with YMCA. I been working there for almost 2 yrs. I never got a raised, my hours have been cut back from 15 to 10 hrs a week, hire a new guy for afternoon shift which it not nessecary and fianlly lay off.

So I am going to file complaint to Board of Labor cuz the manager wanted me to leave so bad. I was told it has nothing to do with my performance. Go figure!!
 
Geez, I guess being on SSI ain't so bad afterall. :ugh:
Why not wait til you find another job and then quit?
 
yeah true, but sometime SSI won't let any deaf ppl gettin SSI check if that person resign the job on purpose or with complain reasons.. so just watch out.. i heard many deaf ppl which can't gettin ssi cause of complain reasons while they quit the job.. so one thing .. DONT COMPLAIN about the JOB with manager and just sign the paper i wanna to quit and got alot of reasons so dont need to let Manager or Boss know the reasons why quit!! cause NONE of their business.. so they will find out on their own , they will be feeling GUILTY what they done to that person! .. that what one of SSI who worked and told me abt it... so i learned that!


TongueOnFire
 
pinkster, I was in almost same situation... in one of deaf schools where I worked as one-to-one specialist with some special needs kids. I worked with a teacher who hates my guts for some reason... She and I used to be good friend until her best friend and I broke up, she decided to make my life hell for a full year... I was so close to walk out on my job several times but I stayed until worktime's over. It is not easy...

I don't want to quit because of my resume so.. I finally came up with a idea and see the doctor to get the note to 'pardon' me from the work and she did. I left on a good term and also look good on my resume as well. I found another job and sticked to it until I moved back to California.

pinkster, I know the feeling. I really do. Keep your chin up no matter what! But here's tip: be courteous in your resignation. Good luck!
 
Last edited:
Good luck with the resignation letter... say everything positive.

And then at the end of the letter...
put down this.... they won't understand spanish.


PS, bese mi asno ;)
 
Magatsu said:
pinkster, I was in almost same situation... in one of deaf schools where I worked as one-to-one specialist with some special needs kids. I worked with a teacher who hates my guts for some reason... She and I used to be good friend until her best friend and I broke up, she decided to make my life hell for a full year... I was so close to walk out on my job several times but I stayed until worktime's over. It is not easy...

I don't want to quit because of my resume so.. I finally came up with a idea and see the doctor to get the note to 'pardon' me from the work and she did. I left on a good term and also look good on my resume as well. I found another job and sticked to it until I moved back to California.

pinkster, I know the feeling. I really do. Keep your chin up no matter what! But here's tip: be courteous in your resignation. Good luck!


That's really good it worked out for you. I've been at my job for almost 3 years, and in the last year it's gotten really really bad. There's more to it than what I've said. We've lost 9 employees since the middle of December. 7 quit, 1 was "laid off" and 1 was fired. I'm just next in line. My uncle says they are waiting for me to leave. I told him part of me just wants to stay and rub it in their faces. But he said "it's that part they're warning you about, isnt it?" I have an inner brat (i stole this from a book i read) and she is definately throwing a temper tantrum right now. :( I'm usually very stable and reliable. I almost never blanch at things that go wrong. So my being erratic and abrasive, is bothering me. I'm a good person. Why do bad things happen to good people?

I'm thinking of putting in my 2 weeks on Friday. And then I'll have enough money.. I rethought my resignation letter, you know.. I cant just throw it all in their faces. (bah!) But all I'm gonna say is, other opportunities have shown themselves to me, and I choose to move on to a better experience.. blah blah blah :(


As for the spanish thing, the GM knows spanish. She joked and said if i taught her ASL she'd teach me spanish. wtf. 2 faced bitch :( (sorry)
 
I have been both an employer, manager, and an employee. Every person has to decide what they are willing to put up with. In all those positions.

An employer generally does not need an employee bad enough to put up with one who has a bad attitude, does not complete work assignments, and is insubordanent. A manager is in a bit tougher position usually because they have to answer to the owner when they fire a trained employee. That is a loss to the owner because they had to pay someone to train the employee and pay the employee to be trained at the same time. The manager must find a way to justify the firing to the owner, or risk his/her own job. Sometimes for them, the easiest thing to do is to make the employee mad enough to quit.

An employee does not see all the stuff that goes on behind the scenes. Most managers have been through what the employees go through and more. Usually they are promoted because of their organizational skills and people skills, but not always.

Your manager should not have verbally attacked you. Especially when it is witnessed by customers and coworkers. That was wrong. Possibly she was furious with you because you were being insubordinate. That is just cause to fire an employee. But not to scream and yell at one.

The last time I left a job like that, there was a corporate order to reduce the engineering staff. I got an email from the manager telling me that from now on I would have to come into the factory every last Saturday of the month on inventory day. Even though I always had my inventory done and all stock tickets turned in on Friday afternoon. I was on a salary based on a 40 hour week, but they had steadily increased my duties to an eighty hour week. I answered his email "No." I was fired for insubordination. The company reported to the unemployment office that I quit. But I NEVER run down the company on a resume or job interview. That makes them think "Uh-oh! Trouble!"

If you do quit, make the letter sickly sweet, complement them, praise the experience you have acquired there and the other employees, and use something like a sick relative or a relocation for your reason for quitting and keep a copy. Good luck.
Codger
 
Codger said:
I have been both an employer, manager, and an employee. Every person has to decide what they are willing to put up with. In all those positions.

An employer generally does not need an employee bad enough to put up with one who has a bad attitude, does not complete work assignments, and is insubordanent. A manager is in a bit tougher position usually because they have to answer to the owner when they fire a trained employee. That is a loss to the owner because they had to pay someone to train the employee and pay the employee to be trained at the same time. The manager must find a way to justify the firing to the owner, or risk his/her own job. Sometimes for them, the easiest thing to do is to make the employee mad enough to quit.

An employee does not see all the stuff that goes on behind the scenes. Most managers have been through what the employees go through and more. Usually they are promoted because of their organizational skills and people skills, but not always.

Your manager should not have verbally attacked you. Especially when it is witnessed by customers and coworkers. That was wrong. Possibly she was furious with you because you were being insubordinate. That is just cause to fire an employee. But not to scream and yell at one.

The last time I left a job like that, there was a corporate order to reduce the engineering staff. I got an email from the manager telling me that from now on I would have to come into the factory every last Saturday of the month on inventory day. Even though I always had my inventory done and all stock tickets turned in on Friday afternoon. I was on a salary based on a 40 hour week, but they had steadily increased my duties to an eighty hour week. I answered his email "No." I was fired for insubordination. The company reported to the unemployment office that I quit. But I NEVER run down the company on a resume or job interview. That makes them think "Uh-oh! Trouble!"

If you do quit, make the letter sickly sweet, complement them, praise the experience you have acquired there and the other employees, and use something like a sick relative or a relocation for your reason for quitting and keep a copy. Good luck.
Codger

i see what you're saying. It makes sense. She, however, has never worked in retail. She has corporate management experience, and anyone will tell you that those are 2 very different types of management.

I think she should not have verbally attacked me either. It's not the first time she's done that. She did that to another manager and demoted her. They both wrote a letter to the owner but he believed the general manager. That is sickening!

Granted, I said somethings I shouldnt have, and in a manner that wasnt appropriate, but that was after she embarassed me on the sales floor. I told her more than once to stop yelling at me, and she continued. She wants to fight with me, she's itching to do it. Every time she talks to me she uses every method of intimidation. I refuse to cave. She stands extremely close to me, and there was one incident that really irritated me. She was in my personal space and I told her "can you not stand so close to me? You're kind of in my personal space." And she simply laughed at me and hugged me and smiled. I told her i was serious, I'm really stressed out and would appreciate it if she did not do that. She mocked me and said well what do YOU have to do that stresses you out? I was like, well I'm school full time, and if i'm not there, I'm here. She simply mocked me again and laughed.

I work 28 hours a week and I take 13 credits. I was really out of it this weekend because of what happened, it really yanked me out of synch. I have a test today and a take home due Thursday.. I'm falling behind because my mentality is so unstable, I dotn know how to fix it other than quit.


By the way, I applied at walgreens and Hollywood Video :P I'm applying at 3 more places too.
 
pinkster-

I Understand how u feel.. I had to deal with one manager few years ago who made me to do too much stuff til I told boss how I felt then blah.. it worked he was transferred back to his old store but really.. :roll: not fun to work at retail store cuz I had to deal with new people sometimes at first they wud give me ugly looks but i just ingore them and do my work.. but I had been workin at drugstore for almost 5 years so.. but I think u did right thing to leave when u felt things aren't goin your way so I wish u the best of luck findin other job that will make u feel better ;)
 
I am sorry that you were treated that way by general manager. I support your decision on your planning to give her your resignation letter and applying for other jobs elsewhere. Your GM should not give you a hard time. I am more than willing to smack your GM for you, but DV is not resolution though. My prayers are with you....I hope you will get a better opportunity than being stuck with your bickering GM.
 
Be sure to send a copy to your supervisor's boss as well. ;)
 
VamPyroX said:
Be sure to send a copy to your supervisor's boss as well. ;)

He's the one that wrote me the 2 page letter reprimanding me, and that letter goes in my employee file. He's the owner, and he didnt bother to ask me my side of the story. He hates me, along with her. There's no one higher up than the 2 of them and they're running the store to the ground.
 
:hug: hang in there.. follow your heart.. what is the best for you..
dont want end up nasty consquence... (sorry that you have to go through this)

love ya ! :)
 
Oh dear, I can see that you has rough time to deal with your boss/manager. :ugh:

I know it's sucker:

I dont know about your country but I only tell you what I know about my country here.

You has the right to protest against warning letter if you feel it's no right within 10 calendar days. I would recommend you to check with the lawyer who understand about discriminal rights over workplace. The lawyer would give you tips how to protest yourself or let your lawyer to write a letter to them for you with protestion letter.

OR

Someone, you know well has an expert how to protest against warning letter? Do you have work council (union) in work place? If yes, then go to see them.


If you want to keep your job then do legal what they want for you until you find a new job. (I know it's sucker).

I think it's no good idea to write resignation letter with the reasons because it doesnt help. They will laugh you off!!! You do is get your rights to back them off.
 
pinkster said:
He's the one that wrote me the 2 page letter reprimanding me, and that letter goes in my employee file. He's the owner, and he didnt bother to ask me my side of the story. He hates me, along with her. There's no one higher up than the 2 of them and they're running the store to the ground.

Oh no, that is sucks !! I hate those people who are favoristim. Nowdays, they become more and more favoristim. I could not trust anyone at Federal Government job for 23 years. They promoted and got too many awards.

I work for Human Service at second shift job which is much better because I could communicate with Deaf clients and staffs. It makes me feel good about myself because I am part of their culture and language. I always enjoy to work at second shift job than Federal Government job.

Do not let the hearing people oppressed on you due to your Deaf ! :hug:
 
Oh...I know what you are going through! :tears:

My husband just got his ultratium last monday is to resign or termination if necessary. Boy that pissed my husband off huge time.

He has worked for this company for 9 years. His bosses got really ticked off at him for missing a day at work last week to take care of our infant who was very ill for over a week with serious virus. I missed so much work (four days) and I had to go back to work and it was time for my husband to take turn to take care of our infant (which was the last day of week).

behold by Monday the bosses bickered and bickered about him missing work last week, my husband rarely missed work in 9 yrs, he worked overtime with no pay, no promotion, all 9 performances were excellent from evcaluation. Bosses forced him to take proofreading class so he can proofread his own projects to avoid any mistakes such as typos. My Husband did make very very few typos which is very common since no one is perfect, he has recieved wrong information from his clients which was not his fault at all. Bosses still instists it is all his fault for getting wrong information. Bosses just decided he did the worst performance over typos...three months after evcaluation...something is not right here.

He works as graphic designer (no other graphic designers-by himself), billing, and other things, he does not have the time to proofread his work as his projects piles up as his bosses pressures and pressures him to finish all at same time. My husband asked for help and can not do it all by himself, bosses told him too bad, work come first than family itself.

My husband got fed up and handed his resignation paper recently yesterday, his bosses had four hour meeting with human resources somehow human resources disagreed with my huband's resignation papers from what he was being treated by his bosses so they handed him termination papers instead. his last day is this friday, he is not gonna show up, he said fuck them.

I rather him to be terminated so we can get unemployment checks to support the family with two boys under age of three, while he looks for something else down the road. he will be househusband for part-time. it is nerve wracking, we have to pull our boys out of daycare since we can not afford 370 weekly. yes 370 bucks for two boys at daycare. it is real expensive to live here in northern virginia.

Strange thing, my husband wanted to resign so his resume will look better but he wanted to be fired bec of unemployment checks, his bosses refused to fire him, they wanted to blackmail him by giving his name a bad name for other companies not hiring him to save their money to do resigination instead of termination.

SOmehow human resources got a hold of this and decided to do termination because my husband had family and all. It is all confusing and chaos at same time due his dad having alzhimers or parkinsons at same time. my husband informed bosses to be prepapred if something happens with his dad. bosses told him too bad, work work. my husband said what if his dad dies, bosses say well one day off then work.. are you fucking kidding me?!?! my husband works as contractor for the government, sheesh....

we are gonna gather all information that my husband has saved up and will be mailing to EOE. Since it is pretty obivious a huge discrimination issue here. I know it is so hard and putting up with assholes.
 
downing said:
Oh...I know what you are going through! :tears:

My husband just got his ultratium last monday is to resign or termination if necessary. Boy that pissed my husband off huge time.

He has worked for this company for 9 years. His bosses got really ticked off at him for missing a day at work last week to take care of our infant who was very ill for over a week with serious virus. I missed so much work (four days) and I had to go back to work and it was time for my husband to take turn to take care of our infant (which was the last day of week).

behold by Monday the bosses bickered and bickered about him missing work last week, my husband rarely missed work in 9 yrs, he worked overtime with no pay, no promotion, all 9 performances were excellent from evcaluation. Bosses forced him to take proofreading class so he can proofread his own projects to avoid any mistakes such as typos. My Husband did make very very few typos which is very common since no one is perfect, he has recieved wrong information from his clients which was not his fault at all. Bosses still instists it is all his fault for getting wrong information. Bosses just decided he did the worst performance over typos...three months after evcaluation...something is not right here.

He works as graphic designer (no other graphic designers-by himself), billing, and other things, he does not have the time to proofread his work as his projects piles up as his bosses pressures and pressures him to finish all at same time. My husband asked for help and can not do it all by himself, bosses told him too bad, work come first than family itself.

My husband got fed up and handed his resignation paper recently yesterday, his bosses had four hour meeting with human resources somehow human resources disagreed with my huband's resignation papers from what he was being treated by his bosses so they handed him termination papers instead. his last day is this friday, he is not gonna show up, he said fuck them.

I rather him to be terminated so we can get unemployment checks to support the family with two boys under age of three, while he looks for something else down the road. he will be househusband for part-time. it is nerve wracking, we have to pull our boys out of daycare since we can not afford 370 weekly. yes 370 bucks for two boys at daycare. it is real expensive to live here in northern virginia.

Strange thing, my husband wanted to resign so his resume will look better but he wanted to be fired bec of unemployment checks, his bosses refused to fire him, they wanted to blackmail him by giving his name a bad name for other companies not hiring him to save their money to do resigination instead of termination.

SOmehow human resources got a hold of this and decided to do termination because my husband had family and all. It is all confusing and chaos at same time due his dad having alzhimers or parkinsons at same time. my husband informed bosses to be prepapred if something happens with his dad. bosses told him too bad, work work. my husband said what if his dad dies, bosses say well one day off then work.. are you fucking kidding me?!?! my husband works as contractor for the government, sheesh....

we are gonna gather all information that my husband has saved up and will be mailing to EOE. Since it is pretty obivious a huge discrimination issue here. I know it is so hard and putting up with assholes.

Holy cow! That realy sucks. It sucks that so many jobs out there lack the benefits and other things that people need to live. :(

I'm still waiting to hear from those places I applied at! If I dont hear by tomorrow, I'm calling on Monday! :P
 
Isn't it true that if you walk away from your job, after working for at least a year, you're not eligible for unemployment benefits? The same applies if you hand in your resignation paper, you're not eligible for unemployment benefits because you're practically walking away?

Pinkster and Downing: I'm sorry about the way you guys have been treated at your jobs. If you ever need free legal advice, go visit www.freeadvice.com particularly their Employment and Labor Law forums.

Good luck.
 
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