hearing deaf realtionship...parents are stubborn

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xoxokrysta

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ok so i am hearing but i have 2 older sisters and 1 younger sister whom are Deaf and their mom is Deaf. I have some hearing loss but not enough to really call myself hoh. but anyways...

I have been dating this guy whom i have known my whole life we grew up together and went to school together and now we have been dating for about 4 months and he is Deaf. It wasn't until we started dating that I met his family. They knew whom I was but I had never met them. Well he comes from a very Deaf family and their family is very proud of being Deaf (if u get what I am saying...) in other words they hate me becuz I am not deaf. But the funny thing about it is when they 1st met me @ church (I go to an all Deaf church) they had no idea I was hearing...and for the 1st like 3 months of our relationship his family had no idea. I never talked around them and I had a sk3 so I always txtd and plus I went to a Deaf school...and well I guess they just assumed. Well anyways about a month ago I answered my fone in front of them and they realized I wasn't deaf.

Well they went from loving me and telling me how happy their were their son had found such a good girl to me not being aloud at the house anymore...

I dont understand it. They told Craig(their son) that they wanted their daughter-in-law to be Deaf and for them to have a Deaf family and all this...

now i dont know what to do...any ideas???

PLZ HELP!! b4 all this happened him and I were talking about getting married...now we dont know what to do...

any suggestions???
 
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Can you sign? If yes, there is nothing wrong about being particapted in the deaf world very much. You should talk to them and find out why they are not liking this or something, they should accept who you are.
 
wooooah, I don't know how to respond to that one. were you pretend deaf, or just loved deaf environment and culture and wanted to immerse yourself inside....maybe I donno how you mean.
 
i have never pretended to be Deaf. All of my Deaf friends know I am hearing. They just assumed because I had always gone to a Deaf school because of my sisters and I go to an all Deaf church...so ya...i dont know what to do...i have tried talking to them but they said they dont want their son being w/ some1 who isn't Deaf...they said it isn't right.
 
xoxokrysta said:
ok so i am hearing but i have 2 older sisters and 1 younger sister whom are Deaf and their mom is Deaf. I have some hearing loss but not enough to really call myself hoh. but anyways...

I have been dating this guy whom i have known my whole life we grew up together and went to school together and now we have been dating for about 4 months and he is Deaf. It wasn't until we started dating that I met his family. They knew whom I was but I had never met them. Well he comes from a very Deaf family and their family is very proud of being Deaf (if u get what I am saying...) in other words they hate me becuz I am not deaf. But the funny thing about it is when they 1st met me @ church (I go to an all Deaf church) they had no idea I was hearing...and for the 1st like 3 months of our relationship his family had no idea. I never talked around them and I had a sk3 so I always txtd and plus I went to a Deaf school...and well I guess they just assumed. Well anyways about a month ago I answered my fone in front of them and they realized I wasn't deaf.

Well they went from loving me and telling me how happy their were their son had found such a good girl to me not being aloud at the house anymore...

I dont understand it. They told Craig(their son) that they wanted their daughter-in-law to be Deaf and for them to have a Deaf family and all this...

now i dont know what to do...any ideas???

PLZ HELP!! b4 all this happened him and I were talking about getting married...now we dont know what to do...

any suggestions???
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Tell them that God doesn't allow his people to discriminate. If they love God as you do, then they should love you too. Because you are God's daughter and also you love their son so they should accept you as their daughter-in-law. Do something special for them. They might accept you there after. :cool2:

Regards,
DeafPenPal
 
DeafPenPal said:
Tell them that God doesn't allow his people to discriminate. If they love God as you do, then they should love you too. Because you are God's daughter and also you love their son so they should accept you as their daughter-in-law. Do something special for them. They might accept you there after. :cool2:

Regards,
DeafPenPal
Click to expand...

thanks!! I mite just do that. They are always saying they never get a night out...i could offer to babysit the kids for them and let them go out?? or i am a good cook if they wouldnt let me babysit i could maybe cook for them?? sound good???
 
I think I'd tell them where to put that flagpole up. What matters is you and your significant other. thats all there is to it, family may ease off in future if they get to understand better, but just stand up for yourself and choices-don't let people discourage you from dreams even if they are loved ones.
 
Are you still in contact with your significant other? Such as SMS, email, MSN chat, AIM?
 
it just means his family is retarded.

At least he still loves you. In time, im sure they can get over it.
 
xoxokrysta said:
i have never pretended to be Deaf. All of my Deaf friends know I am hearing. They just assumed because I had always gone to a Deaf school because of my sisters and I go to an all Deaf church...so ya...i dont know what to do...i have tried talking to them but they said they dont want their son being w/ some1 who isn't Deaf...they said it isn't right.
Click to expand...

How does a hearing person get into a deaf school without the proper documentation?
 
Byrdie714 said:
How does a hearing person get into a deaf school without the proper documentation?
Click to expand...


becuz i grew up in a deaf household i was allowed to go there. I wasn't the only hearing person in my school at all. As I said b4 I have 2 older sisters whom are deaf and my step mom whom i lived with was deaf...so ya.
 
xoxokrysta said:
lol we are still together we just cant ever go to his house anymore...which sucks...
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Damn, that sucks - Is your boyfriend aware of this situation? He needs to tell them off that it is up to the boy to decide, not the family!
 
Tell the family to back off and mind their own business. It is up to your boyfriend if he supports you or takes their side. What's important is how you both feel about each other not what your families feel about each other. You arent dating them but yea, families can put stress on relationships so talk to your boyfriend and tell him how you feel. It seems like his family wont accept you if they are being discriminatory so my suggestion is to not worry about what they think but about what your boyfriend thinks of you and your relationship with him.

HOpe that helps!

I had the same issue with my ex-hubby's family at first cuz I was the first white person to marry in their family. They are Mexicans but eventually they grew to accept and love me for who I am rather than for my race.
 
I am sorry to hear. Can you tell to your boyfriend's parent to back off?? None of their business. They are prejudge about hearing world. If you love your boyfriend and he love you each other. You can tell to them that you're interpreter for your boyfriends and other deaf. If they aren't right for you. You might find a deaf man in hearing family. It will be work for you. I guess.

My husband is hearing and I am deaf. He accepted who i am. He used to have problem with his stutter. His all family are hearing. My family are hearing. His family accepted who I am. They loved me so much! They understand about I am deaf. No matter what. Your boyfriend's parents are wrong to rejected you. You have to confront to his parents and talk about this situation. They need to understand how do you feeling. They can't tell to their son to do.

I attend to hearing church. Nobody reject me. It doesn't bother me at all. Deaf people from church are wrong to judge on you're hearing. You know my hometown at deaf church have hearing people there. They are welcome and mixed. The hearing know the sign language or have a deaf parents or children.

I hope you and your boyfriend to confront and talk about problem the solve to work it out.

xoxokrysta said:
ok so i am hearing but i have 2 older sisters and 1 younger sister whom are Deaf and their mom is Deaf. I have some hearing loss but not enough to really call myself hoh. but anyways...

I have been dating this guy whom i have known my whole life we grew up together and went to school together and now we have been dating for about 4 months and he is Deaf. It wasn't until we started dating that I met his family. They knew whom I was but I had never met them. Well he comes from a very Deaf family and their family is very proud of being Deaf (if u get what I am saying...) in other words they hate me becuz I am not deaf. But the funny thing about it is when they 1st met me @ church (I go to an all Deaf church) they had no idea I was hearing...and for the 1st like 3 months of our relationship his family had no idea. I never talked around them and I had a sk3 so I always txtd and plus I went to a Deaf school...and well I guess they just assumed. Well anyways about a month ago I answered my fone in front of them and they realized I wasn't deaf.

Well they went from loving me and telling me how happy their were their son had found such a good girl to me not being aloud at the house anymore...

I dont understand it. They told Craig(their son) that they wanted their daughter-in-law to be Deaf and for them to have a Deaf family and all this...

now i dont know what to do...any ideas???

PLZ HELP!! b4 all this happened him and I were talking about getting married...now we dont know what to do...

any suggestions???
Click to expand...
 
I agree with you. Families can put stress on relationships. It drove me crazy! I am glad it's all over with wedding.. Whew!

shel90 said:
Tell the family to back off and mind their own business. It is up to your boyfriend if he supports you or takes their side. What's important is how you both feel about each other not what your families feel about each other. You arent dating them but yea, families can put stress on relationships so talk to your boyfriend and tell him how you feel. It seems like his family wont accept you if they are being discriminatory so my suggestion is to not worry about what they think but about what your boyfriend thinks of you and your relationship with him.

HOpe that helps!

I had the same issue with my ex-hubby's family at first cuz I was the first white person to marry in their family. They are Mexicans but eventually they grew to accept and love me for who I am rather than for my race.
Click to expand...
 
i have boyfriend also hearing but he can sign little not too much im hope my boyfriend will be good sign im hope so but he will spelling not too much like mine!
 
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