Dating and Dining on a FIRST Date, do you....

[Banjo]

One night stand perhaps.. :P

I know some people who go to the bar just for that. They also lead a dysfunctional lifestyle too as well. No real close friends, no relationships, etc.

 

[TXgolfer]

This post is incredibly off-putting. You didn't say anything offensive, but if I were looking around for a date, this post would be like

Just remember, you and I already have a date planned for the last day of earth. I'm thinking skiing.

 

[deafskeptic]

So would I.

 

[deafskeptic]

I know some people who go to the bar just for that. They also lead a dysfunctional lifestyle too as well. No real close friends, no relationships, etc.

I don't think such a lifestyle is for me.

 

[Banjo]

I don't think such a lifestyle is for me.

Same here. Thankfully, I'm happily married.

 

[VacationGuy234]

Same here. Thankfully, I'm happily married.

Bottom line, the guy is going to pay for the dates and if he is viewed as a, "nice guy" he's not going to get the woman after that date. After doing this several times, he's going to come to resent it and want the woman to pay her fair share. It's a suicidal move in my opinion, but that is the reason it happens.

 

[Jiro]

I don't know anything about your dating life but I have to say: Jiro, a lot of guys think this way, but the truth is the world doesn't work this way.

what?

Do you honestly believe women are not entertaining more than one suitor?

I'm sure they do and I don't date (hire) such women. Stop wasting your money in escort service.

You are a nice guy, but that's actually a problem. Women don't want nice guys they want real guys.

lol what? what's a "real guy" then? do please educate me.

You're not going to hurt a woman's feelings at every turn and even if you do, trust me, they can handle it.

yes. if they're in relationship with me, it's because they can handle me. I don't coddle.

If you don't communicate electronically, how do you communicate with women? Without online dating (or some forum of service), I don't see how a deaf person can manage it unless you are very good at lip reading and can handle the bars. Online dating is probably the best thing to happen to deaf people since sliced bread, IMO.

1. I meet girls in person.
2. I don't meet girls at seedy places like bars.
3. All my past relationships were done in old fashioned way. no internet.
4. If you communicate with hearing women thru computer to get a date, then how would you communicate with them at bars?
5. I pity you.

There is nothing deceitful about trying to make yourself happy.

I'd like to see both of us being happy, not just me.

 

[Jiro]

Bottom line, the guy is going to pay for the dates and if he is viewed as a, "nice guy" he's not going to get the woman after that date. After doing this several times, he's going to come to resent it and want the woman to pay her fair share. It's a suicidal move in my opinion, but that is the reason it happens.

so what is that guy supposed to do?

 

[VacationGuy234]

4. If you communicate with hearing women thru computer to get a date, then how do you communicate with them at bars?

If you use the internet, you don't have to go to bars.

And to answer the question of, "what you do". You don't take women out to dinner on the first date and if that is the type of date the woman wants you move on the next woman.

It's not a perfect solution because you will cut down on the amount of dates(and not that simple because they say if you get a date), but hopefully it will cut down on the amount of bad dates.

 

[Jiro]

If you use the internet, you don't have to go to bars.

no. my point is - how will you communicate with hearing woman anywhere?

And to answer the question of, "what you do". You don't take women out to dinner on the first date and if that is the type of date the woman wants you move on the next woman.

It's not a perfect solution because you will cut down on the amount of dates(and not that simple because they say if you get a date), but hopefully it will cut down on the amount of bad dates.

so how is it working for you?

 

[Reba]

Bottom line, the guy is going to pay for the dates and if he is viewed as a, "nice guy" he's not going to get the woman after that date.

It worked for my Hubby. He's a very nice guy. We've been together for almost four decades.

After doing this several times, he's going to come to resent it and want the woman to pay her fair share.

A truly nice guy won't feel that way. He might need to be more selective about the "nice gal" that he invites out.

 

[Banjo]

I took my wife out to an ice cream shop on our first date. It was owned by a deaf man. We decided to keep it simple and subtle without so much traffic and noisy people. We had a good time. Going to a somewhat quiet place gives you the opportunity to converse without so much interference. We also went on a walk after that.

 

[Banjo]

It worked for my Hubby. He's a very nice guy. We've been together for almost four decades.

Congrats, 40 years will be quite the milestone. My parents' 40th anniversary is coming up this April.

 

[Reba]

Congrats, 40 years will be quite the milestone. My parents' 40th anniversary is coming up this April.

Congrats to them!

 

[Daredevel7]

Perhaps Daredevil, but you don't strike me as the type of woman who would want that in a guy(given that you have a picture of yourself holding up a fish). Are you saying that a guy who treats you like some breakable egg is what you want in a man? If the guy cries while paying the bill, would that be a green flag?

I think it's kind of odd that you are going extremes. I might as well say to a woman "do you really want a guy who beats you up?" if the woman wants a "bad boy".

Also.. I think it's weird that you think a nice guy means someone who is extremely submissive, sensitive, and apparently cries whenever he has to pay for something? (I still don't understand the crying thing, why is he crying?)

By the way, I'm not sure if you realize this, but everyone has a different idea of what they want in a partner.

For example, I get irritated when a guy puts his arm around my shoulders all the time. It makes me feel like he's telling everyone that I'm his. For other women, they like being held, appreciate the affection, and it "makes them feel safe". So.. this imaginary guy may not be a "nice guy" to me, but maybe so to others.

 

[Daredevel7]

Just remember, you and I already have a date planned for the last day of earth. I'm thinking skiing.

Oooh... I like that. Especially if the last day of earth involves the world caving in itself. We can go down a double black diamond and go into the ultimate drop off into the black nothingness.

 

[whatdidyousay!]

If a guy invited me out for dinner, I expect he pays.

Vacationguy - Women do not go out on dates just to get a free meal...is that what you really think?

I am sure there are some women that will just use a guy for free meal. And men will do the same.

 

[Jiro]

Oooh... I like that. Especially if the last day of earth involves the world caving in itself. We can go down a double black diamond and go into the ultimate drop off into the black nothingness.

The Blue Hole

 

[VacationGuy234]

no. my point is - how will you communicate with hearing woman anywhere?


so how is it working for you?

Face to face after I make contact with them on the internet, I can't hear in a crowded bar that has a band playing so this way it works out better for me.

I would only do three dates a month max because it takes a lot of time to plan the dates, you need at least a week to learn what she likes and dislikes.

A full hearing guy can do much more than that(although it's not a good idea), but I'm not really on a level playing field here so I do the best I can.

 

[Daredevel7]

The Blue Hole

Get certified and come with me to the Blue Hole.