another good debating topic!

You misunderstand me. It´s uninvited guests, I´m talking about.
If they're uninvited, then they are party crashers or trespassers, not "guests".

Wedding invitations sometimes include "and Guest" because they want to include their friend's girlfriend or boyfriend but they don't know that person's name (it might be someone different by the time the wedding happens).
 
If I was invited to a wedding, and I brought a guest, I would be the one buying the gift and put both of ours names on the gift, if my guest would like to bring a gift, for all that means he/she can. ;)
 
Its not the guest responsibility to bring a gift/money or whatever. The person whose invited is to bring the gift. The guest is to enjoy the wedding with the invitee.
 
Here in the US.. It's pretty common that a lot of people will go to a wedding where they know the Bride or Groom.. but don't know anybody else at the wedding.. so they may bring someone they know... so they have someone to talk to. It happens a lot around here. Sometimes people socialize with others at a wedding, but usually they won't. so they bring a guest if the bride and groom permits one on the invitation.

Hope this helps Liebling. It may be uncommon in Europe, but here, it's relatively common.
 
If they're uninvited, then they are party crashers or trespassers, not "guests".

Wedding invitations sometimes include "and Guest" because they want to include their friend's girlfriend or boyfriend but they don't know that person's name (it might be someone different by the time the wedding happens).

:confused:

Uninvited guests didn't attend their church and reception to greed their foods and drink, don't they?

Uninvited guests can mail cards and gifts to congrat bride and groom if they can't make up to congrat them personality. It's really lovely surprise for Bride and Groom see many people stand outside waiting for them to get out of church to greet them.... Stay with people and chat with them, take pictures with them, etc. before they leave church for go home or reception... (uninvited guests don't go in reception and church). Only invited guests can go in reception and church.

I consider it as bad manner when uninvited guests go in church and reception.
 
Here in the US.. It's pretty common that a lot of people will go to a wedding where they know the Bride or Groom.. but don't know anybody else at the wedding.. so they may bring someone they know... so they have someone to talk to. It happens a lot around here. Sometimes people socialize with others at a wedding, but usually they won't. so they bring a guest if the bride and groom permits one on the invitation.

Hope this helps Liebling. It may be uncommon in Europe, but here, it's relatively common.

Yes, I am total surprised after read those whole thread here. We (Europeans) beleive wedding is special for Bride and Groom and their relatives and close friends only because a wedding is once in forever. Why should I invite a guest to bring guest when I didn't know them well? I only invite people, I know very well and close to. If I want to know new people better then do that somewhere..., not wedding... until I know them better more and more then I invite them....
 
if you were invited to a wedding and were allowed to bring a guest, would you EXPECT YOUR GUEST TO CONTRIBUTE TOWARDS MONEY/OR GIFT for the bride and groom??? or it is YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO TAKE CARE OF THE MONEY/GIFT??? and your guest is just there to tag along and keep you company? :D

I picture to myself when I live in America.

Accord Invitation card, I am allow to bring a guest with me. I would pick a true or close friend as my guest to come along with me. I ask Bride and Groom for their wish before discuss suggestion together with her about Bride's and Groom's wish gift etc. until we agree then... I will respect if my guest want to buy something different than buy together with me.

If I bring my boyfriend as guest then we would discuss together what we want to bring something in our hands to their wedding because we are an adult and know our responsible and manner.

I do not consider it as my responsible to take care of money/gift for guest because a guest is an adult and know her manner how to honor my best friend's wedding. I would feel embarrass to bring her to my best friend's wedding without something in her hands for them. If they are my children, then is my responsible to take care of gifts/money etc. for them.
 
i have recieved invitations where it is addressed like this.... or got invited by people as their guests as well...

Ms. "" "" and guest <<< ??? that means the guest is also invited by the bride and groom too???

address
city, state, zip

I would say YES to your question here and disagree with most posts here. (Sorry.. no offend )
 
If my guest was a friend of the bride and groom, he/she probably would have gotten his/her own invitation.

But if someone is my guest, there's no obligation to bring a present.

Yes, that's right it's no obligation but it would be nice thoughtful of guest to bring something in their hands.
 
i bring a guest if i want to (ONLY if it says on the invitation) to keep me company... many people do that these days... who likes to go to weddings alone??? unless it doesn't say A GUEST on the invitation...

We are not children. :)

I come for Bride and Groom, not anyone else.

Before I was married, I often attend friends and co-workers' weddings alone... and meet people, I know there or new people there.

Bride and Groom will know that I have a boyfriend or fiancee then they send invitation card to name me and my boyfriend or fiancee.

You know that I will be Angel's and Roadrunner's bridemaid. I didn't bring my family to company me due my boys' school and expense, etc. I will fly 15 hours alone from Germany to America and meet online people in real life alone. I learn their culture and ASL alone... I am only one who know ASL very little.. :dunno: I only come for Angel and Roadrunner, not anyone else period. .
 
I wouldn't expect that guest to bring a gift because that guest is there for me, not for the wedding.

It wouldn't be fair to ask someone and then expect them to bring a gift. If they want to bring a gift, great... if not, fine.

I'm not going to make it my own responsibility to bring an extra gift for my guest just because my guest is "another" person attending the wedding.
 
.... because that guest is there for me, not for the wedding.

Respectfully disagree... that guest is for the wedding, not you because bride and groom OFFER you to bring a guest to keep you company. They invite you and a guest... Without their invitation, a guest would not be around.
 
I wouldn't expect that guest to bring a gift because that guest is there for me, not for the wedding.

It wouldn't be fair to ask someone and then expect them to bring a gift. If they want to bring a gift, great... if not, fine.

I'm not going to make it my own responsibility to bring an extra gift for my guest just because my guest is "another" person attending the wedding.

If your guest is there for you, that means you're going to share your plate with the guest even your glass of wine? :giggle:

I'm sorry, but If you don't even pay your guest's way to the wedding, even the food, the drinks, the cake, I think you should be responsible for the gift for the guest that you brought to the wedding, It would be more polite that way. But, that's you I guess. ;)
 
If your guest is there for you, that means you're going to share your plate with the guest even your glass of wine? :giggle:

Do not forgot to shave your legs, let him rub all over your legs under the table. :naughty: No one will see you. Do not worry
 
In my experience growing up, it was customary for people to bring guests to weddings. Usually, weddings are big family affairs, but friends, co-workers and acquaintances are invited to the wedding as well. It is customary to give these people a choice to bring a guest or not.

I don't understand what the fuss is about. I think having more people to share the day is much more fun than being concerned about the amount of food that was eaten, and caculating my gift profits from the wedding. I think it's rather silly to do so. I would only ask that the invitees let me know if he is bringing a guest or not, and that's it, so that I can make the proper wedding preparations with enough chairs, food, space in building, etc...

I think it is extremely low class to expect gifts from your guest's guests. Period.

If I had been invited to a wedding, and am allowed to bring a guest, then I would bring my boyfriend, of course, or a very good friend. But in no way would I expect my boyfriend nor my good friend to pitch into the wedding present for the couple. All that I expect from my guest is to share good humour and manners/respect with everyone at the wedding.
 
Top 8: Wedding Guest Etiquette Q&A

You've got questions, we've got answers. Want to be a wedding etiquette whiz? Read on.

Q: I've been invited to a friend's wedding, but I don't want to go alone. Is it okay to bring a date?

A: Check your invitation envelope. Does it just say your name or does it say your name "plus guest"? If yours is the only name on the envelope, then you're the only one who's been officially invited. Resist the urge to ask the couple if you can bring a guest anyway. Instead, figure out who else might be attending the wedding solo and plan your transportation (and accommodations) with them, if possible. If it's still too uncomfortable to attend alone, then you can politely decline the invitation.

Q: How do I find out where the couple is registered? It doesn't say on the invite.

A: It shouldn't. If the couple included their registry info on the invitation it would seem as if they were asking for gifts -- and technically wedding gifts are not mandatory. Check to see if the couple has listed their website on the invite. If so, chances are they've indicated where they're registered somewhere on that. If so, their registry information is probably on their site. If not, start asking around -- try members of the couple's wedding party, the couple's family, and if all else fails, the couple themselves.

Q: My husband and I were recently invited to a 3 p.m. wedding ceremony followed by a 6 p.m. black-tie reception. Does this mean that he should wear a suit for the ceremony and then change into a tux for the reception? And does that mean that I have to change into a different dress?

A: Breathe a sigh of relief, because one outfit will be fine for each of you! Though the old school etiquette rules say that you must wait until evening to break out the black tie attire, these days, going formal during daylight hours is acceptable (only tails are now considered improper for a daytime ceremony). You should both don your best duds for the ceremony and the reception, no changing required.

Q: I've heard that you have up to a year after the wedding to buy a gift. Is that true?

A: Technically, yes -- But chances are if you don't send something within two months of the wedding date, you'll forget (and the couple may think you've forgotten) -- so try to get it out as soon as possible. The date the couple gets back from their honeymoon is a doable goal.

Q. I recently received an invitation to a wedding reception but not the ceremony. Apparently the church is very small. Is this acceptable?

A. More and more couples are opting to have intimate family ceremonies with a small guest list and then hosting larger receptions that include all their relatives and friends. You may feel like you're missing out on the most important part by just going to the reception, but at least you'll be there to raise your glass to the bride and groom. It is acceptable to only extend an invite to the reception. But it is never acceptable to only extend an invitation to the ceremony if you're also having a reception.

Q: What if there's no RSVP-by date on the invite? How long do I have?

A: Many invitations will specify the date by which you should respond. If you've received an invite without one, your best bet is to respond ASAP. Don't leave it on the coffee table where it might get lost amid the magazines. Instead, check your calendar, mark your reply immediately, and slip it in your bag to send out the next time you pass a mailbox. If you've put off replying for a few days or weeks because you're not sure of your schedule (or just forgot about it), make sure you send your RSVP at least 3 weeks before the date of the event.

Q: I'd love to avoid shipping costs on the gift I've bought the couple and, instead of sending it, just bring it directly to the reception. Is this ok?

A: It's not necessarily bad form to bring your gift to the wedding, but it's not the most thoughtful way to present a gift to the couple, either. Someone has to lug all the gifts back home after the reception is over, and there's a slim chance your gift might get lost in the scramble. If you really want to bring something the day of, opt for a card with a check or gift card.

Q: If the invite is addressed to "The Keller Family" does that mean that all of us, including the kids, are invited?

A: If the invitation is addressed to the entire family, then you can take it to mean just that: All members of your immediate family including your spouse and children are invited to the wedding.

Photo: Liz Linder Photography

© 2006 The Knot Inc. All rights reserved

Top 8: Wedding Guest Etiquette Q&A
 
If your guest is there for you, that means you're going to share your plate with the guest even your glass of wine? :giggle:

I'm sorry, but If you don't even pay your guest's way to the wedding, even the food, the drinks, the cake, I think you should be responsible for the gift for the guest that you brought to the wedding, It would be more polite that way. But, that's you I guess. ;)

I don’t know where you grew up, but in the south, the guests never pay for the food they eat at the wedding. Very traditional weddings the bride’s family pays for the food and drink for all who attend the wedding. Now it is more the bride and groom both pay for the wedding. I have never heard of people having their guests pay for the food.

Now there is another southern tradition that is gaining popularity in other parts of the country thanks to TV. The groom’s cake. It is usually chocolate and not very fancy, unlike the wedding cake which is.
 
I don’t know where you grew up, but in the south, the guests never pay for the food they eat at the wedding. Very traditional weddings the bride’s family pays for the food and drink for all who attend the wedding. Now it is more the bride and groom both pay for the wedding. I have never heard of people having their guests pay for the food..

Oh no Hun, That's not what I meant, I was only giving an example--never mind. :giggle:
 
Same here. Weddings are usually big affairs that a very large number of people go to, typically. Several hundred people are in attendance. Just my dad’s 3 sisters and their kids and grand kids and my immediate family make 100 people. With a family like mine, once you include the brides family. Then friends and coworkers you can easily top 300 to 400 people. That is a lot of folks. I am shy when I don’t know people. If at a wedding I don’t know anyone other than the bride and groom I would feel very uncomfortable in such a large crowd. Who would I sit beside, where would I eat? What would I talk about? Yes it is the bride and grooms day but at any gathering or celebration it is the host’s (in this case the bride a groom) responsibility to make sure that all guests are comfortable and happy. That is why they ensure there is enough food and seating for everyone. You are invited to this special day to share in their happiness. If you are uncomfortable how can you share in this moment? I think this is why the “you and a guest are invited” was begun. Also dating relationships change. You may have a boyfriend or girl friend when the list for the invitation is made. But the two of you break up and by the time the wedding has come ‘round you are dating a new person. Not nice to say aw yeah I am going to have a good time, but you can’t come. The same holds true that you could be single when the invites are sent but in a couple when the time of the wedding has arrived. Or for our more sensitive people, If you recently broke up with your significant other and you still want to be their for your friend who is getting married but emotionally it is difficult to see a relationship doing well when yours didn’t you might need your best friend to be moral support for you so you don’t have an emotional hick up and bring down other people’s time.
 
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