Bullies?

[Fly Free]

I've been the victim of bullies before, too. Teasing, redicule, physical cruelty. You name it. The scars of which I'm still dealing with. It can and does last a life time. I have nasty trust issues that I'm still working through. I have other issues, too, that I am working through.

I can see how my experience with being bullied had both a postive and a negative affect on me. The negatives are pretty obvious, but the postive side of it, is that is has made me stronger, albeit, battle scarred.

Oceangurl -- *nodding* yep i agree with that comment u had said i put in bold -- like i recall a character Conan (from the old movie Conan the Barbarian if i recall correctly on the movie title) had said -- "That which doesn't kill me makes me stronger"

 

[Gemtun]

Never been a bully because I was a victim of bullying. Growing up, there was a boy who lived 2 houses away from my house. He knew that I was often alone after school as my mom worked long hours. He knew that my brother and sister were often out playing while I was content to stay home reading.

He would sneak up behind me and say Boo!, trying to scare me. He would then start to leer at me and tell me that Im fat & ugly. He would tell me that Im no good and no guy would want me. I would start to cry and he would get such joy out of it After he left, I would just cry and cry for hours. My family could not understand why I was very depressed and sad. I was too afraid to tell them because I knew that my brother would beat him up but that would only make that jerk come back to me with further venegance.

To this day, I absolutely hate this guy with all of my heart. I ran into him a few years ago and went out of my way to ignore him. He seems to have changed a lot and felt remorseful but I will never forgive that asshole. :fu2:

 

[Oceanbreeze]

Oceangurl -- *nodding* yep i agree with that comment u had said i put in bold -- like i recall a character Conan (from the old movie Conan the Barbarian if i recall correctly on the movie title) had said -- "That which doesn't kill me makes me stronger"

This is true. I think that bullying is probably pretty common place. It was considered a "right of passage" of sorts, that one had to endure. I even thought that way for awhile. Look back, though, I realize that what I experienced and I'm sure what others experience, was far more than a "right of passage". In fact, I would say that what I experienced from other children my age was flat out abuse, and should have never been tolerated by the adults around me. But, it was. So, yes. I endured it. I also got stronger because of it. But, it would have been nice if I had never known that kind of pain.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Yes, I was being bullied at school. It's normal like everyone here.

I was also being bullied by online, too. I choose to ingore them and stay firm because I know what I'm saying. I won't let bullies who think they know everything and tried to belittle me and prove me wrong.

 

[Nesmuth]

I've always been bullied by the ASL fanatics simply because I can speak.

Richard

 

[Margie]

I've been bullied too.

I was bullied when I was little, and I had no "Friends".
They called me very name in the book, including 'Dirty Jew".
I totally agree with Richard, ASL "Groupies" bulling him just because hes deaf and can talk.
Margie
Dir. of Communication Services
OCDAC

 

[Angel]

I was also being bullied by online, too. I choose to ingore them and stay firm because I know what I'm saying. I won't let bullies who think they know everything and tried to belittle me and prove me wrong.

Smart girl

 

[Liza]

Yes, I was being bullied at school. It's normal like everyone here.

I was also being bullied by online, too. I choose to ingore them and stay firm because I know what I'm saying. I won't let bullies who think they know everything and tried to belittle me and prove me wrong.

Sweetie, being bullied is NOT normal. It is an abnormal situation to be in - and the psychological price is just so much, and most of us are still paying for it to this day.

What we can do about the price today is within our power. I think we have to make a conscious change from being in victimhood to empowerment. What kind of conscious changes depends on everybody, and I doubt the needed conscious changes are one size fit it all.

Do you know what the price we've had to pay for years? Loss of that sense of control, and having to live with an illusion that had protected us for years since the traumatic event or series of events. Time to take back the reins, ya know?

 

[Mizzou]

Bullied to kids on school bus.... but in school, I was attacked by bull kids. ODD ??

 

[Oceanbreeze]

Sweetie, being bullied is NOT normal. It is an abnormal situation to be in - and the psychological price is just so much, and most of us are still paying for it to this day.

What we can do about the price today is within our power. I think we have to make a conscious change from being in victimhood to empowerment. What kind of conscious changes depends on everybody, and I doubt the needed conscious changes are one size fit it all.

Do you know what the price we've had to pay for years? Loss of that sense of control, and having to live with an illusion that had protected us for years since the traumatic event or series of events. Time to take back the reins, ya know?

I would have to concur with this. Unfortunately, alot of people think bullying is normal simply because it happens so often. Sadly, we have seen the tragic results of bullying. All we have to do is look to our school shootings. Many kids end up going off the deep end, because, they were rediculed and no one listened to their cries for help. Therefore, they decided to take matters into their own hands.

Then, you have someone like me who didn't go on a shooting rampage, but instead, thought no one would listen, so I kept all that pain inside of me for many years. As a result of this and other things, I developed PTSD. I also have trust issues that runs very deep inside of me. I'm an introvert. I take everything that happens around me, and I internalize it. The consequences of bullying go on for a life time. Bullying is anything but normal and should not be tolerated!

 

[DreamDeaf]

You know...it's interesting we're talking about bullies...

Have you noticed that we DO have a few bullies RIGHT here on AllDeaf???

What a frikkin shame...

They seem to think that they can say anything they want to make others feel inferior, demean their posts, and in general, get away with what they're saying because they're not breaking rules on AD?

What a damn freakin' world.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Sweetie, being bullied is NOT normal. It is an abnormal situation to be in - and the psychological price is just so much, and most of us are still paying for it to this day.

What we can do about the price today is within our power. I think we have to make a conscious change from being in victimhood to empowerment. What kind of conscious changes depends on everybody, and I doubt the needed conscious changes are one size fit it all.

Do you know what the price we've had to pay for years? Loss of that sense of control, and having to live with an illusion that had protected us for years since the traumatic event or series of events. Time to take back the reins, ya know?

I doesn´t mean that bullies around in real life and online are natural. I mean that I heard like this very often in real life and online sound "normal" to them. "Bullies" around never stop... it going on like this every years and years.(Sorry to confuse you with my post). I mean that I was being bullied at school is normal as like everyone did. Something like that I said to myself "oh dear" when Danny came home with crying that he was bullied by his school mates thru our deafness and remind me of school time. I comforted and support him...
Yes, I know bullies around are most horrible. I had been suffered like this before. I hate it. REAL SUCKER! I mean that there´re bullies everywhere everyday in the world. I was like ahh because I heard is "bullies" around. I was not surprised when I read all of posts here about bullies around at school time because I had through like this before. I mean that I heard like this before.... I doesn´t mean it´s natural... something like that "normal" that everyone are being bullied by school, onlines etc... I doesn´t mean that it´s natural for people to bully you... I mean that I heard most bullies around at school time like "normal". I dont mind to explain you again if you dont understand what I am trying to say.

Yes, I know bullies around is very very very hurtful and bruise ways because I myself had been through before.

Anyway I teach my children to not bully/judge anyone.... but respect them.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

You know...it's interesting we're talking about bullies...

Have you noticed that we DO have a few bullies RIGHT here on AllDeaf???

What a frikkin shame...

They seem to think that they can say anything they want to make others feel inferior, demean their posts, and in general, get away with what they're saying because they're not breaking rules on AD?

What a damn freakin' world.

Yeah I notice it, too. *sigh*

when someone made their post in general way. it doesnt mean that she/he defend others.

I notice somebody call people´s post as stupid post which it´s very offensive when they made their posts in general way because it´s them who made their post.

 

[Cheri]

You know...it's interesting we're talking about bullies...

Have you noticed that we DO have a few bullies RIGHT here on AllDeaf???

What a frikkin shame...

They seem to think that they can say anything they want to make others feel inferior, demean their posts, and in general, get away with what they're saying because they're not breaking rules on AD?

What a damn freakin' world.

Amen!

It's like this, What happen to respect? Even if someone invented a thread or posted, If someone doesn't like what he/she reads just simple ignored, How hard is that? Instead some go on attacking, bashing, and do a name-calling. And they still get away with it. Sad isn't it? I do believe the rules should be enforced.

when someone made their post in general way. it doesnt mean that she/he defend others.

*nodding in agreement*, It's important to look at both sides instead of one side only.

I notice somebody call people´s post as stupid post which it´s very offensive when they made their posts in general way because it´s them who made their post.

Oh I know Hon. Even through the rules applies that AllDeaf supports freedom of speech, But, show some respect. I don't think calling someone's post stupid or making themselves look stupid was showing respect.

 

[Liza]

I doesn´t mean that bullies around in real life and online are natural. I mean that I heard like this very often in real life and online sound "normal" to them. "Bullies" around never stop... it going on like this every years and years.(Sorry to confuse you with my post). I mean that I was being bullied at school is normal as like everyone did. Something like that I said to myself "oh dear" when Danny came home with crying that he was bullied by his school mates thru our deafness and remind me of school time. I comforted and support him...
Yes, I know bullies around are most horrible. I had been suffered like this before. I hate it. REAL SUCKER! I mean that there´re bullies everywhere everyday in the world. I was like ahh because I heard is "bullies" around. I was not surprised when I read all of posts here about bullies around at school time because I had through like this before. I mean that I heard like this before.... I doesn´t mean it´s natural... something like that "normal" that everyone are being bullied by school, onlines etc... I doesn´t mean that it´s natural for people to bully you... I mean that I heard most bullies around at school time like "normal". I dont mind to explain you again if you dont understand what I am trying to say.

Yes, I know bullies around is very very very hurtful and bruise ways because I myself had been through before.

Anyway I teach my children to not bully/judge anyone.... but respect them.

L, I know you didn't mean that it is a good thing to be bullied - only that bullying is very commonplace unfortunately - and I'm sorry about not being clear about wanting to only elaborate on the meaning of normal. Let me know if you need me to be more clear, too. Thanks for the opportunity to understand you better and being more clear myself!

 

[Liza]

I would have to concur with this. Unfortunately, alot of people think bullying is normal simply because it happens so often. Sadly, we have seen the tragic results of bullying. All we have to do is look to our school shootings. Many kids end up going off the deep end, because, they were rediculed and no one listened to their cries for help. Therefore, they decided to take matters into their own hands.

Then, you have someone like me who didn't go on a shooting rampage, but instead, thought no one would listen, so I kept all that pain inside of me for many years. As a result of this and other things, I developed PTSD. I also have trust issues that runs very deep inside of me. I'm an introvert. I take everything that happens around me, and I internalize it. The consequences of bullying go on for a life time. Bullying is anything but normal and should not be tolerated!

I hear what you're saying, OB. It's very, very stressful... it's amazing how some people survive the incredible amount of stress from it!

 

[Liza]

I hear you, Cheri and Dreamdeaf. Good points about the necessity of respecting one another as fellow posters in a discussion forum. Also consider how EVERYONE from all sides contribute to the toxicity. It's a problem for moderators and administrators. They also have to look at how I and YOU contribute to the toxicity.. it goes both ways. With great power, comes great responsibility.

It's also hard when biased friends get involved and it makes things worse... parroting the toxicity. It just sucks, and there's a fine line between really helping friends and really harming friends and perpertuating that toxicity.

If only somebody could tell me how to spell perpertuating correctly!

 

[Liza]

I never bein bully by someone else!! haha, they scared of me!!!


TOF

Actually, I don't find that quite funny. I AM glad you were never bullied and stuck up for your friends... furthermore I hope you will give more consideration about the kind of psychological pain you inflicted on others through your past actions (stealing lunch money and all) if you haven't already.

 

[Liza]

Thanks Liza for the link , I'll be sure to read into that and I'm sorry to hear what you've been thru during your school years with your friend and same goes for everyone else here in this thread....I've been bullied during my school years too and going thru some sort of situation on line too...I'm usually a chicken to say anything or to stand up against those bullies....maybe in time I will be able to but for now Ill look into that link you had provide....

Thanks once again for sharing your stories and views!

Angel, thanks for your kind thoughts.. sorry that you and others were bullied in these younger days, too, and I hope you and others find closure one day as I do for myself.

 

[Oceanbreeze]

If only somebody could tell me how to spell perpertuating correctly!

p e r p e t u a t i n g.

There, did that help?