Those Who Would Control ...

D

DreamDeaf

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Ive had a lot of chats with a lot of people - and seen a lot of posts here and it makes me wonder about one sub-group of humanity that may have been overlooked here.

I call them the "Controllers."

They are the members who would dictate to you on subjects such as:

Get your nose out of other peoples' businesses (You may not realize it, it's none of your business of where my nose is at all times!).

Lock this thread (Who are you, the thread-keeper? Only the person who started the thread can request that the thread be locked, or the moderator can lock the thread because of flaming, harrassment, or similiar circumstances. You have NO control over a thread that is NOT yours.).

Change your avatar (Now what? Avatars are our identity, our sense of humor, our recognization of what we are or could be. You have no right to tell us. Only the moderator can tell us if it is offensive and not in keeping with the AllDeaf policy. I've seen worse.).

Change your signature (Read above.).

Mind your own business (Again, this forum is OPEN. I can say anything I want to, here, within reason. I utilize my right to have freedom of speech here daily, and I use it to the limit.).

Telling the poster to change his/her attitude, topic, comment (Again, we have the right to have freedom of speech, WITHIN reason. I have had more attitude thrown at me than you could shake a stick at, because they didn't agree with me - so? It may be personal, it may be what I said, it may be just that they don't like me. Well, guess what? I don't care, I yam what I yam, and if you don't like it, you can stuff it up. If you want to give me attitude, I'll be happy to return the attitude back to you, doubled over.).

I could rant on and on - however, I think you get my point.

I have had quite a few posts berating me for my comments - heck, bring them on. I can always utilize the bad post symbol under that member's name, or I can exercise my right to speak - and throw it back in their faces.

What I will not let you do is... CONTROL me.

This is the land of liberty, justice and freedom for all. I am an freakin' proud Polish-Irish American woman, with a witch's nose sticking in business, exercising my right to free speech, postwhoring what I want to say and what I think I have to say. If you don't like it, you know what to do with your problem. Stuff it.
 
I was thinking.. if we lived in the medieval times.. we would be burned as witches.. :D *cackles*

That's a powerful post you made there. While I do agree there are people who try to attempt control and that it is poorly done of them, I want to disagree with the implication that they DO have control ;) Unless I've misunderstood you there. Having control is an illusion. How can that even be real? The time we buy into victimhood is the time we give our power away - IMO.

No one has tried to tell me to change my avatar or to change my signature.. or how to behave myself here. Or I've been overlooking those people??? LOL!!

T'care! :)
 
A pretty good initial post, albeit, a tad heated. I just want to mention that, if done correctly, asking someone, for example, to change their avatar, I had the occasion once very recently to do just that. I felt I could do it because I am a member; thus "an equal share owner" of this site, my motive was for the good of AD and knowing full-well that the mods can't be here all of the time. The member to whom I made the inquiry, ending it with a kiss, was more than glad to comply as it was SO obvious that the impending hammer of a mod was inevitable. So a positive exchange, a positive result occured. It all boils down to civilty and not necessarily strict adherence to the rules.
 
Yeah... That what I felt way...
whoever asking me politely , I do not like your avatar or sig wha..ever.. if you don't like my taste.. then don't stare mine... Or I felt alike.. Ugh, okay.. but sometimes.. feel alike "stunned surprsied" Why can't I ? Which is my avatar or sig.. is freedom speech..
My favorite random avatar and sig... funny and dislike boring...
Hopefully you could understand me.... pretty please.. :D

For AD'ers...
I do respect your own property avatar.. I don't complain about your avatar.. isn't my business... I'm expecting you could respect mine too..

Today is my my... ain't well .. admit I'm very sick... due my head nuts!
ok

For mods: Of course I respect their rules.. I'll change it.. that simple.. ain't hurt..
 
I can't see the avatars and signatures, or even the attachments unless I intentionally open them. I like it that way. Nothing to bother me or distract me from the posts. (Plus, I can scroll thru the pages much quicker.) I love the "edit options" button! :P
 
Personally, I don't care but I was worried about the under-aged kids and for those who are offended by such stuff that cannot be avoided. I knew the mods would do something so I respectfully asked/helped. Freedom of speech is fine ONLY IF it does not harm others; a back door to respect and all that....I'll shut up now till this takes a different direction, uses different examples. :cheers:
 
Reba said:
I can't see the avatars and signatures, or even the attachments unless I intentionally open them. I like it that way. Nothing to bother me or distract me from the posts. (Plus, I can scroll thru the pages much quicker.) I love the "edit options" button! :P
Click to expand...

Being computer-illiterate, kinda, I didn't know this, Reba.
 
Umm... well that's depends really, I mean I haven't complaint about anyone's avatar or signature images but for the nudity like showing ummm....ya know, that's not really proper to use especially in the open public forum like this, it not the style that AD was created in the first place ( I mean this is just my opinion ).....


But I do agree with the ' controlling ' that I've seen lately, more of being a bit bossy in a way, and yes I do agree that it's the moderators' and owner's duties to take care of that but also sometimes it may be necessary for others to step in and help in order to keep a thread from going a bit too far like pointing out the AD rules etc, :dunno: cause not all moderators and owner is here 24/7 days a week, and I do not have a problem with that.....


And for 'Freedom of Speech ' well that's depends on how people approach others in such a manner where there's no respect being involved....It doesn't mean we can say whatever we want in order to hurt a person's feelings....
Really it's depends on the situation itself but yeah I can understand the whole point in this.....
 
Miss P, what kind of people are worse than bible thumpers?
 
Tousi said:
Miss P, what kind of people are worse than bible thumpers?
Click to expand...


I think she's talking about the "controlling" ones... :dunno:
 
Angel, right, that's what I think, too, but I want her to expand on her observation.
 
Tousi said:
Miss P, what kind of people are worse than bible thumpers?
Click to expand...


Someone like AJ.... He pissed off with me about stop posting religion on everybody thread.... But look at his avatar and signature. He even demanded me to read his signature. He is a hypocrite.
 
Miss*Pinocchio said:
Someone like AJ.... He pissed off with me about stop posting religion on everybody thread.... But look at his avatar and signature. He even demanded me to read his signature. He is a hypocrite.
Click to expand...

I see, Miss P but there's no need to name names here because it doesn't solve anything. The word, "bible thumper" has a negative connotation to me. Yet, you read, quote, opine about the Bible and then throw out that word makes for a lot of confusion, misunderstanding. If you think your'e being clever and wily doing that, you aren't fooling anyone. Maybe one day, something will sink in and you will see the dawn of a new day for yourself....
 
Good posting, Angel -

Miss P, your post made me smile.


Ok...

I'm talking about those who do not request nicely or try to understand when a member politely declines to comply to the request.

I'm talking about the ones who would order you around, be extremely bossy and rude - acting like they're in the total righteous, and you're in the way, way wrong and not even fit to be on the same forum with them.

I believe that if it comes to a signature or an avatar, only the administrator or a moderator can request you to change it. OR... take Reba's advice, and employ your edit options. I really did like her advice, it was very polite and also gave good advice.

Now come the posting - I believe that while you do have the right to freely speak your mind, you have to do it within reason - meaning that you cannot just say anything that pops up in your mind. You have to formulate an opinion that says what you want to say, and be polite in getting your point across, without being offensive, being rude, being in total, an hee-haw animal.

Like when I said about DEMANDING that a thread be closed - it can only be by request of the orginator of the thread, or if it goes down in flames, by the administrator or a moderator.

Or when someone makes an offensive post, there's the BAD REPLY button. Just push it with your mouse, or if it fails, smack the computer. OR...you can reply back to that person, stating strongly your opinion BUT in a polite, respectful way. Don't be offended if the person flames you. Just let the administrator or a moderator know ... the private message is right there to let them know.

As for those who slaps you around for sticking your nose in other peeps' business (and I've had more than my fair share of that), they do not really know what's going on behind closed doors, and too bad for them...in all likelihood they really want to know and are peeved that you know more than they do. Just press the red triangle below their name, or PM the administrator/moderator, or don't even reply to them...in your case, they don't exist. They're like little gnats that can be annoying at times, but they do die rather quickly.

If you want to slap them back, then go for it. Again, BE POLITE and RESPECTFUL, even when you don't think they deserve your respectful reply. You do not have to respect them, it's your right, but in replying, do be nice. Just be firm, get your point across, and then leave it be. They will be the ones getting into trouble, not you.

Smiles!!
 
Ohhh I got it now DreamDeaf, yeah I competely agree 110% on that!!!! :hug:
 
theres one way u can do this...

dont read a thread thats gonna piss u off, and 2ndly

no one in alldeaf is my mama!

3rdly... thats the kettle calling the pot black tsk tsk what goes ard comes ard.. which is why i support liza's comment we re not controlling we're trying to contain a walking time bomb in here simple said simple done u dont like what we say then go to the next thread and calm down like i said in above im not your mama u not my mama and liza is right....
 
Cheri, I think it would be best to just simply say that it's happened to all of us at one time or another; some more often than not; some danged near all the time. We all live and learn, eh? :D
 
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