Hi Ellie!!!
Im in the same boat... but our boat is heading back to shore after being "stuck out to sea" for a bit.
Well, a quick introduction:
My name is Katt, Im 22 years old. Im hearing, and so is my boyfriend(he is the father of both my children and the one on the way)... we have two children, both boys, both deaf.
James is six years old, he has a severe to profound bilateral hearing loss, which is hereditary
Ian is six months old, has the same loss, also hereditary, from my boyfriend's side of the family.
Im a signing mom, and strongly encourage a more natural state for children, IE. no hearing devices. I am raising my boys in a dhh world, and am steering clear of any kind of oralism or activities that encourage speaking and reading lips.(FOR NOW, later if they choose to pursue that, I will be the first to sign my kids up.)
Ok... thats my backround.
I think it is wonderful that you are choosing this for your son, as eventually in life he will want to and will come into contact with the deaf culture and the people in it. At first the whole process is very overwhelming, and almost intimidating, but it gets easier and funner as time goes by.
Some books that I found very interesting and helpful finding the backround to deaf culture:
TRIUMPH OF THE SPIRIT (THE DPN CHRONICLE)
Author: DR. RAMOS
Deaf in America: Voices from a Culture
by Carol Padden, Tom Humphries(This book is my personal favorite, Ive read it probably 10 times, and am now reading it to my six year old)
The Mask of Benevolence: Disabling the Deaf Community
by Harlan L. Lane
All great books.
Initially I used these websites to learn sign language, before I got into college classes(btw, college classes arent really that helpful when raising a small deaf child... in the long run they are, but the vocabulary is "off" from thier needs.)
http://commtechlab.msu.edu/sites/aslweb/browser.htm
http://www.lessontutor.com/eesASLdictionarylinks.html
Dont be afraid to ask questions. Ive been to hell and back on that giant bull of a school district. You will find as your baby gets older, who truly has his best interests and who is out to make money off of people with "disabilities".
First thing is first:
Have you applied for SSI? If you dont make much money, but want further help with getting speech therapists, aides, or any other kind of medical assistance with your child, I would contact SSI and get help. Ill pm you more on this, if you want me too. At this time I am able to spend full time being a sahm and dedicating my time to further educating my children on sign and deaf culture)
Have you been directed to an Early intervention Parent Advisor? An EIPA will help you find classes and tutors for your family to learn sign together, they will also provide a parent advocate to come to your home and help you with your rights, how the IEP process works, Theres also a life IEP for babies, I forgot what they are called, sorry(It depicts your life goals for your child growing, and what you would like to see as of accomplishments within your family and your child's hearing loss), also the EIPA helps with any other questions you have or resources you would like to find in your community(support groups for parents of deaf children, play groups, classes...etc)
If you dont have any of this stuff, pm me your state and Ill find you numbers to call.
Alot of deaf schools also have an early intervention preschool type environment, where parents and children come to interact, before they are legally allowed to join into preschool. If you are close to a deaf school, call them and find out if they provide this.
The most important thing right now is to learn basic signs of your child's daily activities. foods, bathing, eating, sleeping.
What I did for little james was take pictures of him doing certain activities. This allowed him to see the picture of himself, and open up the lines of communication for him and myself for signing to him.
For example. He has a picture of him in the bubble bath.(You can paste the picture on a posterboard card(I usually sized the posterboard 8 by 10) and get them laminated at Kinkos, so that he can hold them and not get grease and other little boy grossies on them.
On the front it had the picture and bold lettering "BATH" then on the back had a picture of a signer signing "BATH" So if I forgot the sign, it would be a quick reference for me and my son.
If you need quick reference sheets to print out, I have them on my computer, I am currently making reference sheets for my neighbor's children, so they can better understand and talk to my son. I can email them to you to look at. They have basic sentences like "clean your mess." "please stop." "Take turns"
Also work sheets to learn words. I know it seems very early right now, but your son is at the perfect learning age, learning delays or not. He just needs a little more attn. But what 20 month old dosent?
Ill probably ramble forever, so Ill let you go now to stew on this. If you have questions, PLEASE feel free to ask me. Im an open book, and would love to make your journey through this as smooth as possible. I had to take the bull by its horns and ride, I wish that on no one. Especially when you get into the public school district... oh man, its like going out into a peaceful deer feild covered in land mines, I kid you not! You just gotta really watch everything, because the nicest, best dressed people are the
sometimes.
(((lots of hugs to you)))
YOU WILL GET THROUGH ALL OF THIS FOG!! And the light at the end of the tunnel is so beautiful. Its like once you know.. then its done... but its hard work getting there, I wont lie.
my yahoo IM name is kattaca7 and my AIM name is Deafkattmom.
super hugs,
katt.
Welcome to AD!
The direction you and your husband seek would probably be best served by contacting school authorities at your nearest residential school for the deaf. If you live in Kentucky, then call the Kentucky School for the Deaf for advice what to do for your child. They would be very glad to help you. (they should!) 
and give him a hug afterwards. If he repeats the wrong or whatever thing he shouldn't do or get into, then you may have to be creative at finding ways for him to see why or why not. Take care and God bless!
