Interesting experience last night

[faire_jour]

Asked my husband (who currently works part time in customer service) He said "I wouldn't have asked the person. We were communicting just fine. It seems inappropriate. It would be just as akward as if we all spoken the same language and they asked you to ask me what drink I want".

 

[rain]

Rain, why don't you go spend more time learning ASL and understanding Deaf culture before you start opening your mouth on a subject(s) you have not a friggin clue about.

They are completely unrelated, it's a question of manners, I don't need ASL to understand manners...rude is rude.

That's like you telling me 1+1 is 2 and me disagreeing because you don't have a PhD in mathematics

Preconceived hatred towards the deaf community? Who is saying that? LOL. Are you on medication or what? Being paranoid isn't such a good thing in here.

Right, coming from someone who supports Rush Limbaugh

Your tinfoil hat is ready for pickup

He isn't just insulting you, but anyone who feel that you did was right not to interfer. I don't know why he is directing at you though. he says you should listen to people who aren't your friend and you say everyone on ALLDEAF gave you a hard time and he think it is a lie. It make me wonder how he truly feel about deaf people and why is he attacking you personally? Maybe because you are hearing?

Innuendo's work too I suppose

Asked my husband (who currently works part time in customer service) He said "I wouldn't have asked the person. We were communicting just fine. It seems inappropriate. It would be just as akward as if we all spoken the same language and they asked you to ask me what drink I want".

Right, because your husband has the intelligence and mindset of a 15 year girl so of course it's right to judge them equally.

Dont be ridiculous

 

[faire_jour]

Rain, why don't you go spend more time learning ASL and understanding Deaf culture before you start opening your mouth on a subject(s) you have not a friggin clue about. You have been trying to turn this whole argument into a simple problem of being rude, which is just deflection. Furthermore, you're basing it on your assumptions of what's rude in your limited (hearing) environment. All of the people on this thread (well, most of us anyway) are backing up FJ because we all know exactly what she is talking about and have been in the situation many times before.

The real issue here, which you cannot grasp because of your limited knowledge and exposure to deafness, is one of self-sufficiency and independence.

Sure, FJ may have worded her initial post in a way that someone without hearing loss, or someone outside the Deaf community, would take the wrong way. But consider for a second who her audience is here... We understand the situation she was in the other night. In fact, all of us have probably been in that same situation more times than we can even remember, and there's a reason we all agree she was in the right.

Your little temper tantrum (funny how you keep accusing FJ of being immature when your posts have been nothing but whiny and accusatory) was cute at first, but I think you're starting to outlive your welcome.

Tick tock...

I agree with this. I posted here because I knew that the Deaf community would understand the perspective from which I viewed the situation, and would have had similar experiences.

 

[faire_jour]

They are completely unrelated, it's a question of manners, I don't need ASL to understand manners...rude is rude.

That's like you telling me 1+1 is 2 and me disagreeing because you don't have a PhD in mathematics



Right, coming from someone who supports Rush Limbaugh

Your tinfoil hat is ready for pickup



Innuendo's work too I suppose



Right, because your husband has the intelligence of a 15 year girl?

Wow, now I'm starting to think you are a troll. I thought, at first this was a misunderstanding, but now that you are turned to personal attacks, I think you are just enjoying fighting...

 

[rain]

The real issue here, which you cannot grasp because of your limited knowledge and exposure to deafness, is one of self-sufficiency and independence.

Just for curiosities sake, how would you respond to my above example and being a waitress with the French patrons?

Wow, now I'm starting to think you are a troll. I thought, at first this was a misunderstanding, but now that you are turned to personal attacks, I think you are just enjoying fighting...

Funny you ignored him inciting the personal attacks by asking me if I'm on medication. But that's okay I'm always wrong and you're always right...

I think rain meant that you need to have good manners next time and not try to do the rude manner with a much better manner to be polite way.

Well, at least one person understood my perspective...

 

[rain]

I would have been wrong. It isn't that person's job to translate for me.

By the way, try this...

Go on any other forum and post that situation verbatim. I guarantee 99% of people will see the bilingual guest was rude, but people here don't see it that way.

 

[naisho]

yo rain-man.. Just some personal advice. I think you should just drop it in this thread and exit left. That is if you really want to get welcomed around to stay around here in future discussions.

It is really a situation where you have to be deaf to actually know what she is talking about, unless you are a CODA or have deaf children/family yourself.

I do want to say you got the methods down though, firm pat on your back for being a successful troller. (not in a negative way). Most people can't do it.

Plus, there will always be future opportunities you can jump in her discussions and jab her in the ribs when someone threw the punch already anyway. But in this one, this isn't the right one.

 

[TWA]

Just for curiosities sake, how would you respond to my above example and being a waitress with the French patrons?

If you could glimpse outside your little world and pay more attention, you'd see that your analogy is not applicable. FJ has already stated the reason:

THERE IS A SHARED LANGUAGE; Both the deaf mother and the hostess read and write written English. There is no need for a translator, making your analogy void from the beginning.

 

[rain]

Thanks naisho, appreciate the welcome, I don't plan on staying though.

I suppose my mistake here was posting my opinion, because if it doesn't agree with the masses, you're simply a troll. I just hope the next time someone is rude to you, you may get a taste of the same medicine you support dishing out.

 

[rain]

If you could glimpse outside your little world and pay more attention, you'd see that your analogy is not applicable. FJ has already stated the reason:

THERE IS A SHARED LANGUAGE; Both the deaf mother and the hostess read and write written English. There is no need for a translator, making your analogy void from the beginning.

The idea is communication, yes??????

So what's the difference if someone writes it on a board and gets a response or writes in a computer and gets a response?

You don't like the analogy because it contradicts your feeling on the original position.

 

[ncff07]

Thanks naisho, appreciate the welcome, I don't plan on staying though.

bye bye now! don't let the door hit your a$$ on the way out!

 

[faire_jour]

Just for curiosities sake, how would you respond to my above example and being a waitress with the French patrons?

Ok, you need to see the cultural implications.

Deaf people have to deal with hearing people everyday. They are often treated as inferior because they can not hear, and (often) use a language that is different than the majority. Because of the language barrier, many people look down on Deaf people, think that they are stupid, or incapable. In the past, this view was perpectuated by interpreter or educators, parents, relatives, or even spouses, who "jumped in" and "rescued" Deaf people from interactions with hearing people. Deaf people were not given the opportunity to be independant and self sufficient. Luckily, times are changing. Hopefully, there is more education in the world, and hearing people are starting to see Deaf people as equals. If I had stepped in, I would have validated the idea the the mother couldn't handle the situation for herself (even if the employee didn't know, the Deaf mother would have), and I didn't want to be a part of that.

So, no, French people do not have the same cultural mores that dictate the behavior in this situation, but Deaf people DO. That is why they are considered a linguistical and cultural minority group in the US, and not just people with a disability.

 

[TWA]

Thanks naisho, appreciate the welcome, I don't plan on staying though.

I suppose my mistake here was posting my opinion, because if it doesn't agree with the masses, you're simply a troll. I just hope the next time someone is rude to you, you may get a taste of the same medicine you support dishing out.

That's it. No more being nice.

YOU FUCKING IDIOT. You think we don't get people being rude to us on a daily basis? Just because of the simple fact that we cannot hear?

Look around, moron. Where do you think you are?

Now please, I hope you really mean it when you say you're leaving. Go crawl back under whatever rock you came from.

 

[rain]

Ok, you need to see the cultural implications.

Deaf people have to deal with hearing people everyday. They are often treated as inferior because they can not hear, and (often) use a language that is different than the majority. Because of the language barrier, many people look down on Deaf people, think that they are stupid, or incapable. In the past, this view was perpectuated by interpreter or educators, parents, relatives, or even spouses, who "jumped in" and "rescued" Deaf people from interactions with hearing people. Deaf people were not given the opportunity to be independant and self sufficient. Luckily, times are changing. Hopefully, there is more education in the world, and hearing people are starting to see Deaf people as equals. If I had stepped in, I would have validated the idea the the mother couldn't handle the situation for herself (even if the employee didn't know, the Deaf mother would have), and I didn't want to be a part of that.

So, no, French people do not have the same cultural mores that dictate the behavior in this situation, but Deaf people DO. That is why they are considered a linguistical and cultural minority group in the US, and not just people with a disability.

​

Why are you proselytizing to me about the cultural implications when you already answered the question and admitted the waitress was in the wrong?

That's it. No more being nice.

YOU FUCKING IDIOT. You think we don't get people being rude to us on a daily basis? Just because of the simple fact that we cannot hear?

Look around, moron. Where do you think you are?

Now please, I hope you really mean it when you say you're leaving. Go crawl back under whatever rock you came from.

I love you too

This thread has successfully turned from me voicing my displeasure with rudeness to me "supporting it", that in itself is truly amazing

 

[faire_jour]

By the way, try this...

Go on any other forum and post that situation verbatim. I guarantee 99% of people will see the bilingual guest was rude, but people here don't see it that way.

But this is not a "normal" forum. This is a Deaf forum where Deaf community culture dictates what is right and what is wrong. It is not the same as the overall "american" or hearing culture.

 

[kokonut]

They are completely unrelated, it's a question of manners, I don't need ASL to understand manners...rude is rude.

Yet, if you're not familiar with the Deaf community way of doing things, then it becomes a matter of perspective. In one culture it is rude to talk to a person so close while in another culture it's the norm. So, no, "rude is rude" isn't always the case here.

That's like you telling me 1+1 is 2 and me disagreeing because you don't have a PhD in mathematics

For a Base 2 then that answer would be false if you say 1 +1 = 2 since 2 wouldn't exist then. Just 0 and 1 only. So, it's matter of perspective here. 1+1=2 can be true. And it can be false depending on what the rules are in the first place.

Right, coming from someone who supports Rush Limbaugh

Your tinfoil hat is ready for pickup

And how does that relate to this thread accusing someone of being rude when it wasn't at all in the first place? Yet, you're an anonymous person here with nothing to show for at the moment.

..

 

[kokonut]

But this is not a "normal" forum. This is a Deaf forum where Deaf community culture dictates what is right and what is wrong. It is not the same as the overall "american" or hearing culture.

Well, I don't see this entirely as a "Deaf" forum but a forum that caters to mostly people with hearing loss or a part of the deaf/hh or Deaf community in some ways.

 

[rain]

But this is not a "normal" forum. This is a Deaf forum where Deaf community culture dictates what is right and what is wrong. It is not the same as the overall "american" or hearing culture.

So deaf people aren't normal? Is that your implication?

Right or wrong are not debatable, if a bunch of racists on some klan site disagree with you and tell you that black people are 'evil', that DOES NOT make it so

 

[kokonut]

By the way, try this...

Go on any other forum and post that situation verbatim. I guarantee 99% of people will see the bilingual guest was rude, but people here don't see it that way.

It's a matter of perspective because you have in one hand people who are deaf and are a part of the deaf/hh/Deaf community and in the other people who are not familiar with the community and its culture at all and make these wild but clusterfark assumptions on what is rude and what is not.

 

[rain]

It's a matter of perspective because you have in one hand people who are deaf and are a part of the deaf/hh/Deaf community and in the other people who are not familiar with the community and its culture at all and make these wild but clusterfark assumptions on what is rude and what is not.

So if I slash your tires will you sue me for doing something "wrong" or will you let my argument of "right or wrong is relative, perhaps I did him a favor your honor by preventing him from driving that day"?

Oh wait....that'd be an exception, right???