Helping deaf student

rolling7 said:
It is only a list of RID members. There are others who are certified and ARE NOT RID. Still it is helpful list.
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RID and NAD are the only organizations for national certifications.
 
hey guys,
sorry i wasn't able to address any additional information.

i'm his tutor, and i help him with his english.

he knows asl enough to communicate his ideas, thoughts, and feelings. he's proficient in that area. english, he knows the words well, but he doesn't seem to be able to grasp the english grammar. i'm still working on that.

but what's really hard is that he has a hard time concentrating because he tends to put all his focus, frustration, energy and emotion on him being deaf, and how unhappy he is. i try to encourage him to stay happy and that there are many people who are deaf and are happy, and that that's not what determines happiness.

his parents know this, and they have already arranged a counselor and possibly a psychiatrist later this year. but they want me to help him out in the mean time and during the process. she also wanted me to ask around the web, which is what i'm doing now, to see if anyone else has any tips for situations like these.

he's 22, i'm 21. his personality and attitude, very immature. but mainly because of how stubborn he is. if i try to get him to focus on his assignment or homework, he constantly stops in the middle about every 3-5 minutes and complains about him being sad because he's deaf. and that he's lazy and dumb and boring and lonely because of it. of course i encourage him because again, being deaf doesn't mean any of that. but he tells me that's his decision and not mine to make. his decision being that he wants to be hearing and that conditions of the deaf is sadness.

i do like the idea of being friends with him and hanging out with him. i've been taking him out a bit so he's not so bored at home all the time but he's always embarrassed being out in public because he doesn't like the attention he gets when we are signing back and fourth.
 
and complains about him being sad because he's deaf. and that he's lazy and dumb and boring and lonely because of it.
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Does he have any connections to the Deaf community? Maybe if he met other dhh people, he'd come out of his shell. Also, tell his parents about that Adult Vocational Program at ASD, and maybe that might help him develop some skills so he could get a job.
 
jhintak said:
his parents know this, and they have already arranged a counselor and possibly a psychiatrist later this year. but they want me to help him out in the mean time and during the process. she also wanted me to ask around the web, which is what i'm doing now, to see if anyone else has any tips for situations like these.
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Obviously, his parents look for easy answers. All I say is to get him counseled as soon as possible. Do not delay. :eek3:
 
you need to tell his parents if they are not able to get him couseling sooner you will not be able to help them any longer. this kid sounds severely depressed and this could put you in a bad situation. i stand by my earlier advice, but you really need to talk to the parents.

if theres a deaf community in the area find an activity where there are cute deaf girls, that might help, due to the age lol
 
Reba said:
I know only of CDI's (Certified Deaf Interpreters).
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Sorry Reba - I'm in Canada, here they are CID/CDI (one's an English acronym, the other is French ... here because we're officially French& English bilingual - and ASL/LSQ are also official languages in most/all provinces now as well, using the acronym "CID" or "CDI" will get you an Deaf individual who is an interpreter.

Hope that clarifies things :)
 
Reba said:
RID and NAD are the only organizations for national certifications.
Click to expand...

Speaking of which, that relationship sure turned out to be a farce, didn't it....if you know what I mean....
 
jhintak said:
hey guys,
sorry i wasn't able to address any additional information.

i'm his tutor, and i help him with his english.

he knows asl enough to communicate his ideas, thoughts, and feelings. he's proficient in that area. english, he knows the words well, but he doesn't seem to be able to grasp the english grammar. i'm still working on that.

but what's really hard is that he has a hard time concentrating because he tends to put all his focus, frustration, energy and emotion on him being deaf, and how unhappy he is. i try to encourage him to stay happy and that there are many people who are deaf and are happy, and that that's not what determines happiness.

his parents know this, and they have already arranged a counselor and possibly a psychiatrist later this year. but they want me to help him out in the mean time and during the process. she also wanted me to ask around the web, which is what i'm doing now, to see if anyone else has any tips for situations like these.

he's 22, i'm 21. his personality and attitude, very immature. but mainly because of how stubborn he is. if i try to get him to focus on his assignment or homework, he constantly stops in the middle about every 3-5 minutes and complains about him being sad because he's deaf. and that he's lazy and dumb and boring and lonely because of it. of course i encourage him because again, being deaf doesn't mean any of that. but he tells me that's his decision and not mine to make. his decision being that he wants to be hearing and that conditions of the deaf is sadness.

i do like the idea of being friends with him and hanging out with him. i've been taking him out a bit so he's not so bored at home all the time but he's always embarrassed being out in public because he doesn't like the attention he gets when we are signing back and fourth.
Click to expand...

You might try working on some ASL poetry/stories with him that specifically allow him to express the emotions he has about being deaf (audiologically) ... perhaps giving a "structured exercise" in which he can channel and focus his feelings will help him with an "outlet" so he can focus better when not working on that specific topic.

I's also really recommend getting him involved (if at all possible) in things like "deaf sports" (in my area there are , deaf volleyball, deaf soccer, deaf swim teams, deaf basketball etc teams that run almost year round - there are also things such as deaf pool/billards &deaf darts teams).

These physical, Group activities have a two-fold purpose...
1) They get him involved with other Deaf people who have a more positive self-image and deaf-image. These people can show him that the real thing that is "stopping him" in achieving his goals/wants/desires etc in life is NOT his deafness, it's his self-limiting-image of himself. The people he meets at these various activities will, hopefully, become more than team mates, they'll become peer mentors, role models - and most importantly friends with a positive view of themselves and others who happen to be Hoh/deaf.

2) Physical activities (when physically possible, and medically safe) that increase heart rate for at least 10-15mins each time are a fantastic way to naturally boast things such as serotonin, adrenaline and other chemicals in the body/brain that improve mood & confidence while reducing stress & anxiety. It can make a dramatic difference on feelings of self-worth, self-image etc. It also provides a physical outlet for stress, and negative feelings ... and may provide yet another "channel" for his negative feelings, in a supportive environment where the negative feelings can slowly be replaces with more positive feelings

Hope this helps.

I still very strongly believe that this person needs to have extensive contact with a mental health professional where a CID/CDI and interpreter are present to ensure that communication is as smooth and stress-free as possible.
 
jhintak said:
hey guys,
sorry i wasn't able to address any additional information.

i'm his tutor, and i help him with his english.

he knows asl enough to communicate his ideas, thoughts, and feelings. he's proficient in that area. english, he knows the words well, but he doesn't seem to be able to grasp the english grammar. i'm still working on that.

but what's really hard is that he has a hard time concentrating because he tends to put all his focus, frustration, energy and emotion on him being deaf, and how unhappy he is. i try to encourage him to stay happy and that there are many people who are deaf and are happy, and that that's not what determines happiness.

his parents know this, and they have already arranged a counselor and possibly a psychiatrist later this year. but they want me to help him out in the mean time and during the process. she also wanted me to ask around the web, which is what i'm doing now, to see if anyone else has any tips for situations like these.

he's 22, i'm 21. his personality and attitude, very immature. but mainly because of how stubborn he is. if i try to get him to focus on his assignment or homework, he constantly stops in the middle about every 3-5 minutes and complains about him being sad because he's deaf. and that he's lazy and dumb and boring and lonely because of it. of course i encourage him because again, being deaf doesn't mean any of that. but he tells me that's his decision and not mine to make. his decision being that he wants to be hearing and that conditions of the deaf is sadness.

i do like the idea of being friends with him and hanging out with him. i've been taking him out a bit so he's not so bored at home all the time but he's always embarrassed being out in public because he doesn't like the attention he gets when we are signing back and fourth.
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When a student has emotional issues as profound as the person you describe, he cannot be expected to focus properly on his studies...for any number of reasons.

He is correct that it is his decision. Please respect his autonomy.

That is why he is in need of a counselor experienced in these matters, and one who know how to approach his objections without shutting him down. As I stated prior, this really is a situation for the professionals to handle. Please don't try to do the job of a counselor.
 
Anij said:
You might try working on some ASL poetry/stories with him that specifically allow him to express the emotions he has about being deaf (audiologically) ... perhaps giving a "structured exercise" in which he can channel and focus his feelings will help him with an "outlet" so he can focus better when not working on that specific topic.

I's also really recommend getting him involved (if at all possible) in things like "deaf sports" (in my area there are , deaf volleyball, deaf soccer, deaf swim teams, deaf basketball etc teams that run almost year round - there are also things such as deaf pool/billards &deaf darts teams).

These physical, Group activities have a two-fold purpose...
1) They get him involved with other Deaf people who have a more positive self-image and deaf-image. These people can show him that the real thing that is "stopping him" in achieving his goals/wants/desires etc in life is NOT his deafness, it's his self-limiting-image of himself. The people he meets at these various activities will, hopefully, become more than team mates, they'll become peer mentors, role models - and most importantly friends with a positive view of themselves and others who happen to be Hoh/deaf.

2) Physical activities (when physically possible, and medically safe) that increase heart rate for at least 10-15mins each time are a fantastic way to naturally boast things such as serotonin, adrenaline and other chemicals in the body/brain that improve mood & confidence while reducing stress & anxiety. It can make a dramatic difference on feelings of self-worth, self-image etc. It also provides a physical outlet for stress, and negative feelings ... and may provide yet another "channel" for his negative feelings, in a supportive environment where the negative feelings can slowly be replaces with more positive feelings

Hope this helps.

I still very strongly believe that this person needs to have extensive contact with a mental health professional where a CID/CDI and interpreter are present to ensure that communication is as smooth and stress-free as possible.
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As always, completely agree.
 
Ok, here's my 2 cents. First, I don't understand the "later this year" in terms of him seeing a psychologist. Why not now? I'm guessing money has to have something to do with it, otherwise why the wait? The other part of what I'm thinking is that the parents aren't taking his issues seriously, or don't understand the full need for help. In that scenario, a call to a social health worker to have them check up on in might be in order. He just potentially might be what is called a vulnerable adult. Hard to know without meeting him, but this seems odd the parents are addressing this later than sooner. Why?
 
Anij said:
Sorry Reba - I'm in Canada, here they are CID/CDI (one's an English acronym, the other is French ... here because we're officially French& English bilingual - and ASL/LSQ are also official languages in most/all provinces now as well, using the acronym "CID" or "CDI" will get you an Deaf individual who is an interpreter.

Hope that clarifies things :)
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Merci. :ty:
 
anij gave good advice. 21 years old? He is still mad and sad about being deaf. maybe a pretty beautiful hearing girl turned him down because he is not the marrying up material. Or maybe his parents are overprotective. He needs to get more often with deaf people.
 
AlleyCat said:
Ok, here's my 2 cents. First, I don't understand the "later this year" in terms of him seeing a psychologist. Why not now? I'm guessing money has to have something to do with it, otherwise why the wait? The other part of what I'm thinking is that the parents aren't taking his issues seriously, or don't understand the full need for help. In that scenario, a call to a social health worker to have them check up on in might be in order. He just potentially might be what is called a vulnerable adult. Hard to know without meeting him, but this seems odd the parents are addressing this later than sooner. Why?
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I've wondered the same thing, AlleyCat. I have a couple of guesses based on what I've seen in the past with others, but there isn't enough information here to make a determination. I would most definately categorize this person as a vulnerable adult, and would recommend a guardian be appointed by family court, though.
 
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