Has this happened to you QQ

pek1

pek1

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Last Monday afternoon/early evening, a friend with whom I was living with his kids, and I had a discussion regarding money. He has full legal and physical custody of them from their mothers, but this isn't what I am writing about, never mind the fact that he constantly yells at them from the time they get up in the morning until they go to bed at 7 p.m. Their ages are 7, 4 and 2; a girl and two boys. Honestly, I never was sworn at like he does to his kids by my parents. I've lost track how many times he has told any of them to "shut the **** up" or "dog damn you." He gets housing from the county, so only he and his kids can legally stay there. I told him that both his girlfriend and I are not supposed to be there at all (legally) and that he cannot legally collect rent from me, which both things I didn't know about until last Saturday.

Okay, now the plot is set, he escalates the discussion into assaulting me, as well as choking me, holding me down on the floor and applying his weight on me so that I can't breathe. He had ordered me out, but I can't leave when he's on top of me and inflicting physical pain. After about 15 minutes of this, he lets me up, so I went downstairs to start packing my stuff and I collapsed, but not until I called 911 on the basement phone. I was brought to the hospital, had x-rays and a CAT-scan.

I don't have my cell phone on me, so I couldn't call anyone I know to pick me up and bring me back to my van (on his driveway) and get out of there. It was raining, so I stayed around the hospital and eventually checked back into the ER due to my right foot in pain, which x-rays were taken. The doctor looked at it before I left the first time, but, somehow, missed this one.

Okay, now that I explained everything that occurred, my now former friend has not been arrested for assault and attempted murder and the police officer was unable to get pictures of my injuries that night because the digital camera wasn't working, but he did write some things down. I am quite frustrated because I found out tonight that the police report is sitting on the officer's desk and he is on vacation until August 20th or so. In the meantime, what should I do?

A friend of mine is helping me get my things out, but, get this: He's removing my clothes from my hangers. I still have suits in that house, so what am I supposed to do? Any ideas?
 
sounds like you should get a police officer to accompany you to the house to collect your belongings. Also I would contact childrens aid and tell them about the father as well ( if they haven't already been called). That is a horrible environment for anyone to be living in and you should definitely stay with (true) friends or family and stay away from this guy!
 
lilitalia89 said:
sounds like you should get a police officer to accompany you to the house to collect your belongings. Also I would contact childrens aid and tell them about the father as well ( if they haven't already been called). That is a horrible environment for anyone to be living in and you should definitely stay with (true) friends or family and stay away from this guy!
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Ditto!
 
I am sorry this happened to you. I agree you should contact police about collecting your belongings with them.

About the children...the thing that pops out is reporting to Children's Services in your state. This is not right for the children to be living in. They are kids. They don't have to be yelled and cussed at.

This man needs anger management classes.

I wish you the best and let us know how it goes.

I found this about the Minnesota Children's Services. You may want to read for more info how to handle this.

http://www.dhs.state.mn.us/main/idc...ctionMethod=LatestReleased&dDocName=id_000152


Also by law he is likely not legally able to dispose of your clothes without informing you to pick them up. You can take them to a small claims court if you feel they are of value to you worth fighting for.
 
Wow, sounds like he has anger issues.

Bring a policeman with you when you retrieve your belongings. :)
 
pek1 said:
I am quite frustrated because I found out tonight that the police report is sitting on the officer's desk and he is on vacation until August 20th or so. In the meantime, what should I do?
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I'm very sorry to hear about your situation. For that - contact his supervisor to retrieve the report.

pek1 said:
A friend of mine is helping me get my things out, but, get this: He's removing my clothes from my hangers. I still have suits in that house, so what am I supposed to do? Any ideas?
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You must have police officer to accompany you since he's been charged with assault and attempted murder. That is a dangerous man. Bringing a friend is not good enough or even not safe enough for you. Please ask officer to accompany you. Do not forget to tell the officer that he has been charged with assault & attempted murder.
 
This is awful for you. How are the children's mama? Maybe you should contact her to see about the kids? I think I read there are 2 mama's? Are you okay now? I'll check back tomorrow, taking off of work! :hug:
 
Sorry for not responding, as I've been swamped with work to get my classes and funding for my final year going, as well as finding another job. I had an interview yesterday and received and accepted the job offer. I start it next week Tuesday, which is better than Thursday of this week, as I need to do a training day with Snickers with the new students at the university and get them used to seeing her around.

Yes, ClearSky, I received the information, am perusing it now. I am looking at reporting him as soon as all my belongings are out. The kids' mothers know what this guy is like and both have lost in court to him. He presently has a girlfriend staying with him :roll: and is hoping to marry her. She hasn't been married before, but has been abused by other bf's. Honestly, I don't know what she sees in him, as he has used his mouth on her, too, telling her that his kids come first (naturally) and if she doesn't like it to leave. In short, other people and you friends here have said this guy is a bully and he does literally force himself onto people to get his way.

When I retrieve the rest of my stuff, if any more clothes are off the hangers, the police will be there. In fact, before the stuff comes out, they will be there, to make sure he doesn't do that and to ensure all my stuff comes out undamaged.

As for small claims court, am waiting to hear if the DA will press charges and ask that the charges be upgraded to a felony status. When that occurs, I will take him to a higher court with a lawsuit that is significantly higher in dollar value, as I know he has assets. Anger management issues, I think, is an understatement, as he's ex-military.
 
Just said... Careful!

I would take my belongs and leave it alone :dunno2:
 
I'm very sorry to hear about your situation. Like others say in here, make sure you bring a police officer with you.

Don't go back to that house alone or with a friend.
 
Congrats on the job offer!!! Also, you seem to be handling this all very well.
 
Yeah, so far so good. Now, since I got a new place as of last night, this morning I was informed I have to move (again). :roll: I looked at two apartments and the county I live in told me they'll do emergency funding for me, as I'm already their client. Say a prayer for me, people, I need it. Thanks!
 
I hope everything works out for you Pete and I will be praying for you.
 
Oh my God what an asshole. I hope you are ok. I would be calling someone (child protection/cops) to take those kids off him too cos what if he did it to them? People like that make me so mad. :mad:
 
So sorry to hear about all that's going on, Pete. I hope everything gets worked out REALLY soon !!!! Congrats on your new job too :)
 
Oh wow, Pek! That sounded like a scary and frightening experience for you. I am glad to read that things are improving. I hope the mother gets the children away from this guy as it has been proven that he is dangerous.

I am sorry that u had to go thru something like this.
 
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