How do you handle negative comments, questions, feedback etc?

[Liebling:-)))]

How do you handle negative comments, questions, feedback etc?

I am an opinionated and a straightforward person! I speak out honest what I think and feel after learn something.

I know my questions annoy some people because they feel that my questions are "negative" and "insult".

If I want to ask question then do that no matter either it's negative or positive because I want to understand the fact answer to support my and their logic.

I would call myself a hypocrisy and 2 faced if I agree with them all the time when I personally disagree with them.

I try my best to positive their negative feedback.

I am not always prefect as angel but I could be bitch sometimes... I could put stuff their negative opinion down their throat sometimes when they tried to provoke, bash or insult me or ignore their negative comments or stood up against their negative comments.

Best Advice:

If I don't like their questions or comments then don't quote their posts or positive their question when you know how to answer their questions.

If I don't like to get negative feedback from them then ignore them or positive their negative feedback.


The reason, I create a thread here because I hope you try to handle the debate normally. If you can't handle it then leave it and go other thread.

It's great when you open what you think and feeling without scare what the people think of your opinion, feedback, comments, experience, etc.

Come and discuss what you think and feeling.

I want to know your feeling and thoughts.

Please don't bash and insult each other.... but agree to disagree is welcome... share POV is also welcome...

 

[Reba]

...Come and discuss what you think and feeling.

I want to know your feeling and thoughts....

OK. You asked for it.

I think this thread is just an attempt to justify the manner in which you post, and stir things up again. Apparently, you haven't learned anything from the most recent brouhaha.

That's my feeling and thoughts.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

OK. You asked for it.

I think this thread is just an attempt to justify the manner in which you post, and stir things up again. Apparently, you haven't learned anything from the most recent brouhaha.

That's my feeling and thoughts.

Is it general talk? or it's me, you referring to?

Please read my thread carefully. This thread is not about me but about you and everyone what you feel when, what and how you handle negative comments, questions, feedback, etc. from anyone.

 

[GarnetTigerMom]

How do you handle negative comments, questions, feedback etc?

I am an opinionated and a straightforward person! I speak out honest what I think and feel after learn something.

I know my questions annoy some people because they feel that my questions are "negative" and "insult".

If I want to ask question then do that no matter either it's negative or positive because I want to understand the fact answer to support my and their logic.

I would call myself a hypocrisy and 2 faced if I agree with them all the time when I personally disagree with them.

I try my best to positive their negative feedback.

I am not always prefect as angel but I could be bitch sometimes... I could put stuff their negative opinion down their throat sometimes when they tried to provoke, bash or insult me or ignore their negative comments or stood up against their negative comments.

Best Advice:

If I don't like their questions or comments then don't quote their posts or positive their question when you know how to answer their questions.

If I don't like to get negative feedback from them then ignore them or positive their negative feedback.


The reason, I create a thread here because I hope you try to handle the debate normally. If you can't handle it then leave it and go other thread.

It's great when you open what you think and feeling without scare what the people think of your opinion, feedback, comments, experience, etc.

Come and discuss what you think and feeling.

I want to know your feeling and thoughts.

Please don't bash and insult each other.... but agree to disagree is welcome... share POV is also welcome...

I know some can't handle negative or postive feedback because I think in their mind must be "right" all the time and it either their way or the highway. That turns me off. But if a person can't accpet my opinons, then why bother to answer. It seems some can't learn when to agree to disagree on some certain level with respects. I sure it hard some Aders. I mean no one is perfect, so I am not perfect either. It a shame to some friendship get ruin over it. Hope everybody work it out with good intention.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

I know some can't handle negative or postive feedback because I think in their mind must be "right" all the time and it either their way or the highway. That turns me off. But if a person can't accpet my opinons, then why bother to answer. It seems some can't learn when to agree to disagree on some certain level with respects. I sure it hard some Aders. I mean no one is perfect, so I am not perfect either. It a shame to some friendship get ruin over it. Hope everybody work it out with good intention.

for feedback what and how you feeling when you handle the debate.

Yes, I has to agree with you that each person see and think different as us. When we want to open what we think and feeling something then do that, no matter either they think your questions/comments negative or not as long as there're no bash/insult/mock.

Yes, that's right if they can't learn to accept your POV then not answer or try to positive their posts. If it doesn't work then leave it.

Yes, that's right that nobody including myself are prefect.

 

[Cheri]

I came to notice there's some sort of finger pointing, as I see one member saying "I know some can't handle negative or positive feedback because I think in their mind must be "right" all the time and it either their way or the highway."

To be quiet honest people need to take a very good look at themselves first before passing judgment on someone else, because that's no where near the truth.

The Matter of truth is everyone of us had done our share of not agreeing and disagreeing in a civil manner, it's not "some of them" it's not "some of you" it's "all of us". And that's the truth, God my witness would even agree with me.

I do take part at fault where I did not agree to disagree in a civil manner at times. I know for matter of fact every one is guilty on their part too. That's all I am gonna say on this topic.

 

[Maria]

Liebling : I don't mean to laugh, honey...but, the truth is that someday YOU will NOT be able to handle someone, The Creator. Reason: He is the perfect and you are not.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

I came to notice there's some sort of finger pointing, as I see one member saying "I know some can't handle negative or positive feedback because I think in their mind must be "right" all the time and it either their way or the highway."

To be quiet honest people need to take a very good look at themselves first before passing judgment on someone else, because that's no where near the truth.

The Matter of truth is everyone of us had done our share of not agreeing and disagreeing in a civil manner, it's not "some of them" it's not "some of you" it's "all of us". And that's the truth, God my witness would even agree with me.

I do take part at fault where I did not agree to disagree in a civil manner at times. I know for matter of fact every one is guilty on their part too. That's all I am gonna say on this topic.

for feedback what and how you feeling when you handle the debate.

Yes I can understand and agree with your point that we should use common sense and make sure that we should not judge against the people personally but agree/disagree with their POV itself as long as we respect our POV each other when we have different POV.

This Forum is the public for everyone including us share/express our POV, it doesn´t mean that we have to agree all the time when we know that each person is different.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Liebling : I don't mean to laugh, honey...but, the truth is that someday YOU will NOT be able to handle someone, The Creator. Reason: He is the perfect and you are not.

for make me smile.

You can tell me again at my other thread.

This thread here is not about just religion forum but anything like CI forum, debate forum etc. etc. etc. how you handle with debate in positive way.

 

[Chase]

How do you handle negative comments, questions, feedback etc?

I am an opinionated and a straightforward person! I speak out honest what I think and feel after learn something.

You say you are opinionated. My dictionary defines “opinionated” as "holding unreasonably or obstinately to one’s own opinion.” Synonyms are bigoted, stubborn, unyielding, obstinate, and prejudiced. Are you sure you want to be that way?

Opinions are not the same as facts. Opinionated people cannot separate the two, and thus the wording of their opinions become tirades.

Many people think being “straightforward” and “honest” means they can say any evil and insulting thing that crosses their minds and everybody else has to accept it as “who they are.”

Well, most will not accept it. Most people reject such self-centered and self-serving ways of communications as the way bullies and troublemakers behave.

Everything one “learns” is not always the truth. Presenting information--unedited or especially liberally laced with one’s own additions, deletions, or changes--from some electronic source or printed newsletter does not make it true or right. It’s extremely poor scholarship and presentation. By the same token it's extremely annoying and offensive to readers who understand reasonable debate and discussion.

I don't believe anyone really want to come across that way. Most times they have been through some horrible ordeal that's making them lash out in unreasonable ways.

You wanted some thoughts, and these are mine on one small area of the challenge put forth in this thread.

 

[jillio]

You say you are opinionated. My dictionary defines “opinionated” as "holding unreasonably or obstinately to one’s own opinion.” Synonyms are bigoted, stubborn, unyielding, obstinate, and prejudiced. Are you sure you want to be that way?

Opinions are not the same as facts. Opinionated people cannot separate the two, and thus the wording of their opinions become tirades.

Many people think being “straightforward” and “honest” means they can say any evil and insulting thing that crosses their minds and everybody else has to accept it as “who they are.”

Well, most will not accept it. Most people reject such self-centered and self-serving ways of communications as the way bullies and troublemakers behave.

Everything one “learns” is not always the truth. Presenting information--unedited or especially liberally laced with one’s own additions, deletions, or changes--from some electronic source or printed newsletter does not make it true or right. It’s extremely poor scholarship and presentation. By the same token it's extremely annoying and offensive to readers who understand reasonable debate and discussion.

I don't believe anyone really want to come across that way. Most times they have been through some horrible ordeal that's making them lash out in unreasonable ways.

You wanted some thoughts, and these are mine on one small area of the challenge put forth in this thread.

Well said.

 

[deafskeptic]

I try to stay cool in the CI section. I tend to stay out of Cued Speech threads because it's hard for me to hold on to my temper in any thread with a certain poster who only posts about Cued Speech. I know that no matter what forum I'm, there will be others there who tend to get my goat.


As for trolls, I try not to respond to them because I know I'll regret it if I feed them and I try to stay civil to everyone. At other times, I have to post to counter any misinformation so others won't be misled.

I try to be honest and straightforward but I won't resort to insulting people if I can help it. If someone says that all deaf should be raised the oral way only, calling that person an ethnocentric @$$ is not going to help my case any. Citing difficulties like teachers moving around the room so you can't see her lips or turning her back and talking while writing on the blackboard is a much better way to debate oral vs Bi-bi. Of course this applies to other debates that aren't CI related.

 

[GalaxyAngel]

I'm with Chase...

 

[Liebling:-)))]

You say you are opinionated. My dictionary defines “opinionated” as "holding unreasonably or obstinately to one’s own opinion.” Synonyms are bigoted, stubborn, unyielding, obstinate, and prejudiced. Are you sure you want to be that way?

Opinions are not the same as facts. Opinionated people cannot separate the two, and thus the wording of their opinions become tirades.

Many people think being “straightforward” and “honest” means they can say any evil and insulting thing that crosses their minds and everybody else has to accept it as “who they are.”

Well, most will not accept it. Most people reject such self-centered and self-serving ways of communications as the way bullies and troublemakers behave.

Everything one “learns” is not always the truth. Presenting information--unedited or especially liberally laced with one’s own additions, deletions, or changes--from some electronic source or printed newsletter does not make it true or right. It’s extremely poor scholarship and presentation. By the same token it's extremely annoying and offensive to readers who understand reasonable debate and discussion.

I don't believe anyone really want to come across that way. Most times they have been through some horrible ordeal that's making them lash out in unreasonable ways.

You wanted some thoughts, and these are mine on one small area of the challenge put forth in this thread.

I appreciate your feedback about opinionated.

Yes I know that opinion and fact are not same thing but I see nothing wrong when everyone express their opinion/POV after look their own logic.

"opinionated" as a negative word? Is opinionated the same thing as opinion/POV? If you say that opinion and opinionated are not same thing, then what ?

I thought opinionated is a right word when I use "opinionated" in English writing grammar. "I am an opinionated person", not I am an opinion person. (not right English grammar)?

If I want to use "opinion" in English writing grammar then I would say "This is my opinion" or "That´s all what I have in my opinion."

I prefer to use my honest opinion when reply on any posts to positive over judge their posts.

Example:

Opinion: I don't think that it's a good idea to leave your sick children alone for go to work.

Judgment: You are bad parents to think work is important than take care of your sick children.

Opinion: mmmhhhh, your salad taste good but little more spice to add...

Judgment: Huh? your salad taste horrible and too dull, no spicy...

Opinion: I prefer to support my child´s choice.....

Judgement: You are bad and selfish parent for not think of your child´s wish.

I prefer honest opinion over judgement when I visit any forums because I know how to limit my judgement before post my POV what I know and feel. If I agree with my own POV then stick with it because I agree that it´s fact but if their POV is better than my POV then I take their POV to forget my POV. It´s my decision either I agree with my POV or their POV but nobody can try to change me but myself.

I respectfully disagree your negative over straightforward issues... Many people don´t like hypocrisy people who make false statement.

I am a straightforward and honest person to say what I think in manner way. I answer honestly if anyone ask me for my opinion because they deserve my honest answer.

If I know or learn something then say it or question them.

I would call myself a hypocrisy and 2 faced if I give them dishonest answer or agree with them all the time... It´s not for me. If I see what I don´t like then shut my mouth and say nothing. They get my honest answer if they ASK me.

I beleive in confidence to myself to know what right or wrong because I need to look/examine myself instead do what the people says and wants.

If criticism comes, then I have to deal with it in poisitive way.

I know nobody is prefect but we should not judge other people but accept what they are as the same they accept what I am. I like to learn where you all come from as same as you all learn where we come from which is good education for us.

I hope you understand where I come from?

I would be appreicate for your feedback for this.

 

[Liebling:-)))]

Well said.

You gave your honest opinion what you think and feel in most CI forums.

Is honest opinion negative? also straightforward as well?

 

[Liebling:-)))]

I try to stay cool in the CI section. I tend to stay out of Cued Speech threads because it's hard for me to hold on to my temper in any thread with a certain poster who only posts about Cued Speech. I know that no matter what forum I'm, there will be others there who tend to get my goat.


As for trolls, I try not to respond to them because I know I'll regret it if I feed them and I try to stay civil to everyone. At other times, I have to post to counter any misinformation so others won't be misled.

I try to be honest and straightforward but I won't resort to insulting people if I can help it. If someone says that all deaf should be raised the oral way only, calling that person an ethnocentric @$$ is not going to help my case any. Citing difficulties like teachers moving around the room so you can't see her lips or turning her back and talking while writing on the blackboard is a much better way to debate oral vs Bi-bi. Of course this applies to other debates that aren't CI related.

for feedback what you thought about this.

Yes I can understand it´s hard to keep cool yourself when you want to try debate with certain posters who see different as you in positive way. Keep away from forum for a while and think how to positive your post to them... If not, then leave it is better than end into war/heat flaming.

Yes I agree with you totally over trolls. We have to limit what we want to say them then do positive their posts. It would be worst if you negative their posts. Post if you know anything, if not then not post to aviod to get negative answers from them.

Yes I am same as you over honest and straightforward when I want to question them or say something without bash and insult...

I know we could lose our temper sometimes when hot flaming comes but try our best to aviod for a while until we calm down and positive their posts.

for post here which is good education for us.

 

[Jolie77]

I haven't been on AllDeaf for the past couple of days but from what I've seen just now - There's a lot of things that are still ongoing and it is still somewhat stemming or hovering around. It saddens me to see this happening. I mean, We're all adults here right? What happened to the part where we can "agree to disagree", respectfully that is?

As for the negative feedbacks/comments/questions - Personally, If the negativity is around, sometime it is best to steer away from it. I know on the other hand, it is not that easy to get yourself immersed into it and wanting to be a part of it only rather to say what is needed to say. Sometime, things are better not being said at all. Being opinionated is fine. Speaking out on whatever is on your mind is fine too. To share POVs are fine too. No, It's great to do those but unfortunately, sometime there is a point where things have been overturned for the worse. I think the problem is, some of the posts/threads have hit us one way or other which makes us feel like we've got to make it personal. Perhaps it's ok to take it personal. However, to take it personal can also cloud your judgment, that is if you were to go overboard.

So with that, If you were to have a negative feedback/comments/questions that were towards you - You have 2 choice. Either it's to continue by responding it negatively OR you can turn it into something positive by choosing the right thing to say.

Just my 2 cents.

 

[Chase]

This is only my two-cents, also.

To some extent, I suppose we’re dealing with differences of meaning. Except for a few Deutsch phrases, since you write in English and are from the UK, I supposed you use an English dictionary, but that may not be the case.

As I said, I don’t think opinionated was the term you wanted. Probably more what you meant was that you’re a person with strong convictions. I don’t know. You might want to look it up and see if it fits your self-image.

I see the differences you assign to opinion and judgment, and with the examples given I can see the could be useful in certain settings, but the terms are really not so exclusive. They overlap.

The definition of opinion is a belief not founded on positive personal knowledge. It’s only what seems to be valid or probable in the believer’s mind. But that’s the same thing as judgment. An opinion is something our judgment tells us may be true, and when we judge something, we bring all of our opinions into play.

The only thing I can think is that you may have been in a setting where those terms were separated and used for rules of engagement.

Okay, calling yourself “opinionated” as though proud of it really brought up an issue. It really did seem to fit some of your behaviors, and with that admission, if I were a moderator, I would seriously consider asking you to keep judgmental opinion to yourself or stay out of threads where you’re tempted to unleash them.

But putting that issue aside for the time being, you still seem to operate by a set of definitions and rules which turn earnest discussions into heated personal bickering.

Perhaps the cause is in the sources used.

Or maybe it’s the tone of them, seeming to offer more abusive polemics than useful information.

Or maybe it the length of them making people weary, or saying the same thing over and over.

Or taking conflicting passages out of a book of beliefs and nit-picking them out of context. Who knows?

The reason could be others don’t understand your exact rules of engagement and in attempting to counter with their own rules, everything escalates into a nuclear war.

I don’t know if anyone but yourself can go deep enough to get the answers.

I do know the calmer discussion in this thread somehow promises better results.

 

[Alex]

After last night's situation/meeting, I think it's too soon for this type of discussion to take place here. Don't get me wrong, it's a good thread but it was created at the wrong time. I'm sorry but this thread needs to be closed and will be reopened at a later date.

If you have any questions, PM me.

Thanks for understanding.