You ever get people who tell you not to use sign language?

Answering the on-topic Q:
Yes. There are family members and aquaintances that tell ran256 and I not to sign because they feel it is rude to them.
We are much more comfortable associating in groups of D/deaf, HOH, or combinations of deaf/hearing.
 
ASLGAL said:
Answering the on-topic Q:
Yes. There are family members and aquaintances that tell ran256 and I not to sign because they feel it is rude to them.
We are much more comfortable associating in groups of D/deaf, HOH, or combinations of deaf/hearing.
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Tell them it is rude to talk without signing in front of a Deaf person and see how they react. I always tell those who make these kinds of comments that and it usually shuts them up.
 
Tell them it is rude to talk without signing in front of a Deaf person and see how they react. I always tell those who make these kinds of comments that and it usually shuts them up.
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You are right, it completely shuts them up, at the time anyway.

I think this topic could fill a whole section all on its own.
 
ASLGAL said:
You are right, it completely shuts them up, at the time anyway.

I think this topic could fill a whole section all on its own.
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I figured if I have to accept that there will be always some social situations where I wont understand a thing so for hearing people to complain about me signing and them not understanding what I or my friends are saying is just complete lack of respect for us and I wont adhere to their wishes.
 
Signing is a language...

Four years ago I last travelled with BF to America (it was his first time). None of my friends told me to talk English to my BF since he doesn't understand English (or lets just admit it, his English is crappy) :giggle: but I still think it's sexy ;)

Anyway... it's a language and it's a way of communicating... you use the communication way that is most comfortable with you!

I thus speak French with my bf even if I could still want him to speak English but I don't!

People who want to sign have every right to do so because it's their language!

Jamie
 
Agreed.
ran256 and I find it necessary to sign in public places especially loud or background noises even with HAs in.
We were in Olive Garden today and with the clinking, rustling, and so on it is just better and more comfortable to sign.

We have not gone to a family reunion since the one I talked about here already.
 
JamieLynn said:
Signing is a language...

Four years ago I last travelled with BF to America (it was his first time). None of my friends told me to talk English to my BF since he doesn't understand English (or lets just admit it, his English is crappy) :giggle: but I still think it's sexy ;)

Anyway... it's a language and it's a way of communicating... you use the communication way that is most comfortable with you!

I thus speak French with my bf even if I could still want him to speak English but I don't!

People who want to sign have every right to do so because it's their language!

Jamie
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Exactly but when it comes to a deaf person in a hearing family that is not open-minded nor understanding, the view of their deaf family member signing with their deaf friends ata dinner table or family gathering is that the deaf people are being rude to the family. I always find that a big joke cuz the hearing family members never bothered to learn sign to make communication easier for their deaf relatives or take the time to include them in conversations. Hearing people with these kinds of views arent willing to think outside of the box and put themselves in their deaf relatives' shoes.
 
Hearing people with these kinds of views arent willing to think outside of the box and put themselves in their deaf relatives' shoes.
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ignorance in many cases and they do not want to put forth the effort to communicate
 
ASLGAL said:
ignorance in many cases and they do not want to put forth the effort to communicate
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Yea, it just seems easier for them to ingore the fact that us, deaf people, have missed out on so many family moments or information growing up. It is a shame cuz usually many of us end up not really feeling like a part of the family. My brother and I try to avoid family gatherings as much as we can. We prefer to get together with family on an one-on-one basis.
 
Exactly but when it comes to a deaf person in a hearing family that is not open-minded nor understanding, the view of their deaf family member signing with their deaf friends ata dinner table or family gathering is that the deaf people are being rude to the family.
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That's sad... at least in my pov... I have read this so often on this board. It is something that leaves me completely baffled that the own parents/siblings don't even bother learning ASL for their child/sibling... :( and see it as an insult when the Deaf sign in their presence...

Jamie
 
I am totally oral at home and when my friends come over or i bump into my friends(deaf) my mum and the rest of my family dont mind me signing to my friends, I think they think it's great I can use both worlds. I do prefer the deaf world but also like the hearing.
I do hate family gatherings but I usually try and lipread and follow the conversations, if not, I usually ask my mum and she'll happily tell me.
 
I used to hate family gatherings when i was child. Now as most of my cousins talk to me (no signing though.. I am oral) I don't mind family gatherings now days.
 
Yes, I have a few experiences on that field, myself.
My parents never really complained about us (my brother and me) signing, but it didn't make them happy. Family gatherings always used to be, well I don't know if there really is a word for it. They talked a lot, sometimes I had a conversation with one of my uncles or so, but that pretty much was it.
The first person to really tell me to stop signing was my dear mother in law.
A few years ago we were at her place for lunch. Well I signed to my husband and brother in law, naturally, because they are both deaf. Anyway, my mother in law started to complain about that und wanted us to talk. I didn't argue with her and just stopped the conversation until we were done eating.
A few weeks after that we went to pick her up from work (she owns a restaurant) and had to wait for her. So we just went on with our conversation, until she said she doesn't want us to sign in public.
That day we really had a big discussion and she kicked me out of her house.
I was so mad, I just told her what I really thought about the way she treated her kids. We never saw each other after that anymore. My husband just visits her every few month, like for birthday or christmas, but that's it.
Nobody has the right to tell me not to sign, nor anything else. I do live in a free country and I choose to sign.
Honestly, people who have a problem with that, well they have to get along without me. I'm really done with those kind of arguments.
 
JamieLynn said:
That's sad... at least in my pov... I have read this so often on this board. It is something that leaves me completely baffled that the own parents/siblings don't even bother learning ASL for their child/sibling... :( and see it as an insult when the Deaf sign in their presence...

Jamie
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Oh, so many of my deaf friends have to deal with that BS. It is a very very common occurence.
 
Ya know what's funny? I have the same problem at family gatherings. You think that it has to do with the ASL/speaking? It's just any two languages. My family is from Cuba, so the older generation tends to speak Spanish at gatherings. I used to be able to read Spanish well (since I went to college up north, I forgot most of my Spanish), but I still couldn't understand it spoken. They do speak English to me but when they talk to each other, they feel more comfortable and natural with their mother language, just as the deaf people feel more comfortable and natural with ASL. Most of my family, while they can speak English VERY well, cannot tell a story or express an idea as well as in Spanish. This will always happen in a conversation between 2 people who have different mother tongues. Even if one learned the language of the other, s/he probably can't express themselves as well in that language. I prefer my family continues to speak Spanish to each other, because they have much more fun and it's so much more natural for them. If they were forced to speak English to each other in front of me (just as if two deaf people were forced to speak to each other or if 2 hearing family members were forced to sign), that would just make things so awkward, not to mention that it could anger some people.

I just hang out with people from my generation (my cousins!). :)
 
shel90 said:
Exactly but when it comes to a deaf person in a hearing family that is not open-minded nor understanding, the view of their deaf family member signing with their deaf friends ata dinner table or family gathering is that the deaf people are being rude to the family. I always find that a big joke cuz the hearing family members never bothered to learn sign to make communication easier for their deaf relatives or take the time to include them in conversations. Hearing people with these kinds of views arent willing to think outside of the box and put themselves in their deaf relatives' shoes.
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I would question whether they really care about and respect that member of the family too. Because if they did, care and respect that member of the family, they would want to be able to communicate with that member of the family.
 
jasin said:
I would question whether they really care about and respect that member of the family too. Because if they did, care and respect that member of the family, they would want to be able to communicate with that member of the family.
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True ...I agree with u.
 
jasin said:
I would question whether they really care about and respect that member of the family too. Because if they did, care and respect that member of the family, they would want to be able to communicate with that member of the family.
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I can't imagine as a parent NOT wanting to communicate w/my son in a manner that he was comfortable with... either ASL (after he learns it) or verbal... just blows my mind as a parent.

I think you're right a lot of it is respect...
 
jasin said:
I get people all the time who tell me not to use sign language. I pisses me off :mad::mad2: soooo much!!
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No not that I recall, but if someone had told me not to, I'll just tell them then do not use your voice.

Why would people tell you not to use sign language? Give me an example of when and where that had happened at?
 
Adamsmomma said:
I can't imagine as a parent NOT wanting to communicate w/my son in a manner that he was comfortable with... either ASL (after he learns it) or verbal... just blows my mind as a parent.

I think you're right a lot of it is respect...
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I feel the same way over and over again, every time I read one of those posts!

:shock: Jamie
 
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