Why everyone have to hate people with CI?

[shel90]

My parents got me implanted at age 2, does that not allow my parents accept the fact that I am deaf? They got it because just maybe, maybe I would love to have a CI when i get older. If not I can just take the processor off.

First few years of implanting a baby is like training a dog. The earlier you get them to be implanted, the better (likely in many cases) oral speech they are going to have when they get older. Same with puppies, training them is easy at first, as they get older, it will become harder and harder to make them trained.

People that get CI (recently my ex who is at RIT) start to hang out with other crowds because they can be able to diverse with people since they can hear others. They can always come back to the deaf crowd if they want. So yeah implants do change people themselves, but dont feel like they turned against you.

I just dont see how its a change for the worst, they (as you described) are more social.

So, you accept that just because one gets a CI, that's a reason to be a snob to other Deaf people who dont have CIs?

I have never had a CI user be a snob to me but I have heard of stories just like Vampy's and I think that is a shame.

 

[GrendelQ]

I look at CIs like guns.

Guns don't kill people... people do.

Cochlear implants don't change people... people change themselves.

Deaf children getting CIs as infants or toddlers? Blame the parents for deciding to do it instead of accepting the fact that their child is deaf... and/or the doctors for even encouraging the parents to get CIs for their children.

I've lost a few friends at RIT/NTID because they got CIs. When they got CIs, they suddenly considered themselves "hearing", stopped using sign language, started relying more on oral communication (even though they had the "deaf voice"), and hanging out only with the hearing crowd (even though the hearies avoid those CIers). Am I going to blame the CIs? No, I blame those friends who allowed themselves to change for worse.

That's interesting, I was aware of the group of formerly oral deaf here on AD who discovered Deaf Culture as adults and made a conscious decision to shift from English to ASL as a primary language, but I hadn't realized there is a corresponding group of formerly ASL Deaf who -- once able to access sound with new CIs -- shift over to English and self-identify as hearing or CI users rather than as Deaf.

It seems very sad -- going in either direction -- to feel some need to reject friends when making these life choices.

 

[bbaseballboy123]

So, you accept that just because one gets a CI, that's a reason to be a snob to other Deaf people who dont have CIs?

I have never had a CI user be a snob to me but I have heard of stories just like Vampy's and I think that is a shame.

Like i said, they can still talk to the deaf community. Its a choice who people really wanna hang out with.

I mean, I asked a girl a few weeks ago, "why do you like me, i'm pretty much deaf and you could always find a hearing guy that doesnt say what all the time?" (jokingly asking this question to her)

She replied that because she likes me for who i am, not because of one defect. point is, People dont give a crap weather your deaf or not. They care about who you are. And those who got CI probably are hanging out with a different crowd cause they can communicate with them so easily and swift

 

[Banjo]

Like i said, they can still talk to the deaf community. Its a choice who people really wanna hang out with.

I mean, I asked a girl a few weeks ago, "why do you like me, i'm pretty much deaf and you could always find a hearing guy that doesnt say what all the time?" (jokingly asking this question to her)

She replied that because she likes me for who i am, not because of one defect. point is, People dont give a crap weather your deaf or not. They care about who you are.

How ironic, you say that people don't give a hoot about whether you are deaf or not. Yet, you bring it up. Obviously, it matters to you.

 

[shel90]

Like i said, they can still talk to the deaf community. Its a choice who people really wanna hang out with.

I mean, I asked a girl a few weeks ago, "why do you like me, i'm pretty much deaf and you could always find a hearing guy that doesnt say what all the time?" (jokingly asking this question to her)

She replied that because she likes me for who i am, not because of one defect. point is, People dont give a crap weather your deaf or not. They care about who you are. And those who got CI probably are hanging out with a different crowd cause they can communicate with them so easily and swift

This is what you said in reference to Vampy's post:

I just dont see how its a change for the worst, they (as you described) are more social.


So I am asking you is it acceptable that Vampy lost friends because they felt that because they have CIs and dont want to be friends with him because he doesnt have a CI?

 

[bbaseballboy123]

This is what you said in reference to Vampy's post:

I just dont see how its a change for the worst, they (as you described) are more social.


So I am asking you is it acceptable that Vampy lost friends because they felt that because they have CIs and dont want to be friends with him because he doesnt have a CI?

I dont care who i talk to as long as I can be communicative to them. If they cant speak but do ASL (since I dont know ASL), i try to avoid them. If they are no fun to talk to then i avoid them. If they can speak then i will communicative with them, if they are no fun, then no

How ironic, you say that people don't give a hoot about whether you are deaf or not. Yet, you bring it up. Obviously, it matters to you.

I guess you dont joke about your deafness with people. We just so happened to talk about my CI and i brought up to lighten up the mood cause she was soo "aww'd" when i told her about my surgeries.

 

[Banjo]

I guess you dont joke about your deafness with people. We just so happened to talk about my CI and i brought up to lighten up the mood cause she was soo "aww'd" when i told her about my surgeries.

I do make jokes in reference to my hearing loss, however not in that manner because it often indicates that one may view itself as being inferior to the hearing.

 

[AlleyCat]

I have (had) one friend who lives in Florida. She got a CI about 8-10 years ago. Prior to that, she and I were close friends -- college friends, actually. After she got her CI, she refused to sign any longer, dropped all her deaf friends. Her husband is an interpreter, so even though he knows ASL fluently, she won't sign with him. Only speak. And she won't have anything to do with me any longer. Why is that?

 

[bbaseballboy123]

I have (had) one friend who lives in Florida. She got a CI about 8-10 years ago. Prior to that, she and I were close friends -- college friends, actually. After she got her CI, she refused to sign any longer, dropped all her deaf friends. Her husband is an interpreter, so even though he knows ASL fluently, she won't sign with him. Only speak. And she won't have anything to do with me any longer. Why is that?

makes me think of the word, arrogant

 

[Banjo]

I have (had) one friend who lives in Florida. She got a CI about 8-10 years ago. Prior to that, she and I were close friends -- college friends, actually. After she got her CI, she refused to sign any longer, dropped all her deaf friends. Her husband is an interpreter, so even though he knows ASL fluently, she won't sign with him. Only speak. And she won't have anything to do with me any longer. Why is that?

Could be either superiority complex or inferiority complex, or maybe both.

 

[jillio]

My parents got me implanted at age 2, does that not allow my parents accept the fact that I am deaf? They got it because just maybe, maybe I would love to have a CI when i get older. If not I can just take the processor off.

First few years of implanting a baby is like training a dog. The earlier you get them to be implanted, the better (likely in many cases) oral speech they are going to have when they get older. Same with puppies, training them is easy at first, as they get older, it will become harder and harder to make them trained.

People that get CI (recently my ex who is at RIT) start to hang out with other crowds because they can be able to diverse with people since they can hear others. They can always come back to the deaf crowd if they want. So yeah implants do change people themselves, but dont feel like they turned against you.

I just dont see how its a change for the worst, they (as you described) are more social.

My son wanted a tattoo when he got older. But I didn't get it for him at 2 just because I anticipated that he might want it.

 

[jillio]

I have (had) one friend who lives in Florida. She got a CI about 8-10 years ago. Prior to that, she and I were close friends -- college friends, actually. After she got her CI, she refused to sign any longer, dropped all her deaf friends. Her husband is an interpreter, so even though he knows ASL fluently, she won't sign with him. Only speak. And she won't have anything to do with me any longer. Why is that?

It is the result of an internal belief that she is no longer deaf and handicapped as a result of the CI. However, had she not had a strong belief that she was deaf and handicapped prior to the CI, you would not be seeing this behavior now.

One of the reasons that I think that psychological evaluation and some therapy re: self concept and expectations should be mandatory before implantation.

 

[Banjo]

It is the result of an internal belief that she is no longer deaf and handicapped as a result of the CI. However, had she not had a strong belief that she was deaf and handicapped prior to the CI, you would not be seeing this behavior now.

One of the reasons that I think that psychological evaluation and some therapy re: self concept and expectations should be mandatory before implantation.

It wouldn't be the first time, nor the last time. I have met people who were like that. I have met people who I knew to be capable of signing, yet they refuse to.

 

[GrendelQ]

My son wanted a tattoo when he got older. But I didn't get it for him at 2 just because I anticipated that he might want it.

Did you anticipate your child's needs and wants and make choices about what you would feed, how you would clothe, bathe, shelter, provide medical care, education, language and love to your son even though he hadn't yet developed the ability to reason with you and select vegetables over spoonfuls of table sugar?

 

[bbaseballboy123]

My son wanted a tattoo when he got older. But I didn't get it for him at 2 just because I anticipated that he might want it.

and how would a tat benefit/help his medical issue?

Terrible argument.

 

[jillio]

It wouldn't be the first time, nor the last time. I have met people who were like that. I have met people who I knew to be capable of signing, yet they refuse to.

Because they have been taught that sign language is an obvious and observable occurrance of their disability, and that disability means lesser than. That is what they have been taught about themselves, both through overt and covert messages. And they have internalized it. Usually those that protest this the most are those that actually suffer from it the most.

 

[jillio]

and how would a tat benefit/help his medical issue?

Terrible argument.

He has no medical issues. He is Deaf.

The point is, any parent that projects to that degree is simply projecting their own desires on their child.

 

[jillio]

Did you anticipate your child's needs and wants and make choices about what you would feed, how you would clothe, bathe, shelter, provide medical care, education, language and love to your son even though he hadn't yet developed the ability to reason with you and select vegetables over spoonfuls of table sugar?

Comparing apples to oranges. Those things are necessary for a healthy life and are physical needs. CI is not necessary for a healthy lifestyle nor does it address physical needs.

 

[GrendelQ]

Comparing apples to oranges. Those things are necessary for a healthy life and are physical needs. CI is not necessary for a healthy lifestyle nor does it address physical needs.

Much closer than your turnip of a tattoo.

 

[jillio]

Much closer than your turnip of a tattoo.

Nope. A tattoo is a want. A CI is a want. Neither are needs. A healthy diet is a need.