Hearies view on a CI kid... its a bummer

[jillio]

There are numerous posts throughout AD where HOH students were, for instance, educated in a mainstreamed environment, yet never fully felt a part of the social environment. Likewise, many of them will also relate stories of "never quite fitting in", or never really feeling "connected", or always feeling that they were "different". Many will also relate memories of being excluded or ignored by their hearing peers, or being teased for having to ask someone to repeat themselves or having less than perfect speech skills. These people could all "hear" to some degree, but they never experienced "being hearing".

 

[Audiofuzzy]

I see, thanks.

But I think if you think about it, you'll agree with me that it has very little to do with deafness. or hearing. per se, 9O% or even 99% with psychology.

If a child has high self esteem, and is not ashamed of its disability, it projects confidence, which in turn attracts respect and acceptance.
Deaf children are not the only ones that are treated this way - anyone who's "different" in any way is subjected to bullying, rejection, teasing.
Actually the saddest examples in history of someone 'not fitting in' and who ended up commiting suicide or was killed by a mob are of whole, able people.

As for the bullies, teasers, "ignorants" - they do same to all kind of people. You dress at walmart - you are their object of discrimination. You are underweight, overweight, have acne, wear glasses, wear braces, are considered a "geek' - there is always some azzwhole out to get you.
My mom thaught me that, and not to take note of or put an importance on such dumbsters.

I was growing HoH. I wasn't rejected because of my hearing loss, I myself shyed away from people because of my h/loss. People rather didn't gave me an impression of "me not fitting in" - EYE (I) felt different from others on my own. Many times people actually wanted to be with me, get to know me, but I distinctly distance myself from others.
My brother who'se hearing and speaking ability was considerably worse than mine - had higher self-esteem, and in consequence he was not only well accepted at regular school - he was popular. He was always with the "top dogs", both ways- hearing and deaf.


Why I believe it's how we project ourselves, that's our self esteem that maters - I could see how I and my deaf friend were being treated differently by the same people. I am projecting myself with confidence, even if I don't have it, and will force myself to not to step down from an argument. It cost me but in return I gain respect. I will ask people with dead serious face - what's so funny? don't like my accent? Most times it does the trick.
My friend when upset gets irritated, jittery and incoherent on the account that when he is upset his speech got worse. So people are not treating him as seriously as they should. But if he was more sure of himself, he would get so jittery, and in turn, incoherent.
Oh yeah - and it is extremely important to treat OTHERS with respect to receive respect. I am reminding myself always that the hearing person might be not accustomed to dealing with deaf person and may need longer than others to understand me. I try to be always pleasant when I have to repeat myself ad nauseam.

Shel, for example, mentioned somewhere that she gained confidence only after she started participating in the deaf culture. To me, it means she already lacked confidence BEFORE, and so most likely she was treated the way she was projecting herself. Perhaps if she was always confident, in her hearing enviroment also, she would have had different experiences.
True, what helped her to gain confidence was the ability to communcate- but that doesn't matter in this aspect. You either are confident or you don't.

I am curious - is your son confident, Jill? Does he feels rejected by hearing peers, if he has any?

Fuzzy

 

[Cloggy]

...........
Shel, for example, mentioned somewhere that she gained confidence only after she started participating in the deaf culture. To me, it means she already lacked confidence BEFORE, and so most likely she was treated the way she was projecting herself. Perhaps if she was always confident, in her hearing enviroment also, she would have had different experiences.
True, what helped her to gain confidence was the ability to communcate- but that doesn't matter in this aspect. You either are confident or you don't.

I am curious - is your son confident, Jill? Does he feels rejected by hearing peers, if he has any?

Fuzzy

"mentioned somewhere that she gained confidence only after she started participating in the deaf culture." is an excellent example how one is not fully into the hearing world when one is deaf. Just as one cannot be fully in the deaf world when hearing...

 

[Sweetmind]

Shel, you admitted to NOT KNOWING why some children in your program don't seem to have benefits from the CI.
And judging by what you just wrote, I see clearly that you have no knowldge why some deaf people can speak while some not. You just see it, you don't know WHY it is.
You have no clue about their full, detailed medical history, developmental history, even psychological history. YET YOU pass these cases as "proof. What kind of proof is that? it doesn't prove anything, and it's as good as garbage, I am sorry to say because I am 100% convinced if we started to dig deeper we would find out the WHY, and that finally would make sense.

A deaf person born with severe to profound hearing loss WILL NOT learn to speak just like that!!! there must be extraordinairy circumstances for that to happen.





Really? But how WELL?
I don't believe for a minute she can speak as any normal hearing person. Heck, I don't believe she understand 2/3 of what she hears. Guesses, yes but not HEARS.
I can talk on the phone too, so what? It's not easy, I don't get everything what is said, and it is very exhausting. But for someone standing from a distance I seem to be able to "talk on the phone".

If you intend to prove a deaf person without CI is as able to communicate verbally as a deaf person without CI, first get your facts backed up by something with substance- like having your examples presented with complete detailed medical and life history of that person.

I have seen deaf people "talking on the phone". And for every ONE person who can, there is 20 that CAN'T.




If somebody says "if you start exercising your quality of life will improve" - does that automatically means your life quality was only "poor" so far? Interesting.





Excellent comparison, Cloggy. It's exactly like that.




yes, absolutely.....
not being able to hear your newborn first cry, not being able to hear the loving whispers of your loved one, not being able to hear music, not being able to participate in hearing conversation, not being able to hear your child first babbling, not being able to hear the birds sing, not being able to hear a warning bells, not being able to go to the doctor, lawyer, child's teacher, bank official, funeral director without an interpreter, having your child cry because it hurt itself and you didn't hear it calling you, feeling uncomfortably confused beacuse you can't understand when someone is talking to you, not to be able to watch any TV show because CC is not there, having everyone looking at you strangely, and many many more- it's juts terrific!!!! I love it!!!



yes, exactly - without all that we have NOTHING.




You forgot something very important - people does not communicate thru skin color, people communciate verbally and thru writting. A gesturing porvide only very limited communication.
So even those Blacks, Hispanics, Asiatics and Natives in USA must speak English if they want to communicate well with each other.






Then explain to me how does swaying leaves SOUND, how does trickling water SOUND, how does batting an eye SOUND, how does a crow crows, how does a nightingale sings... the SOUND of cat purrs...



Shel only knows her children "can or can not hear." She does not know WHY, she said that herself many times, and thus no, she she doesn't know FULLY what is she talking about.




Cloggy is talking abut an ability to HEAR, Cheri. Can you hear everything? can you in your job talk on the phone freely, talk to people from afar and without seeying their faces? You need no special accomodations?




This is the only reason Shel - you gained confidence. If you were as confident before .you would felt differently too.

Fuzzy

:BS: BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH Deaf parents are NOT LAZY .. . UP YOURS! AUDIOFUZZY .. you dont even know what u are talking about. since you are thinking that you are not deaf... RME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I DO NOT NEED TO HEAR and SPEAK for you or hearing s sake however I CAN SPEAK if you mind.. HEaring people need to wear hearing devices to hear our Deaf HANDS to be heard.

YOU DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ASL that u dont even use it so LOOK AT YOURSELF as being lazy to learn and understand what s ASL all about. How s that sounds to you?


I dont have any respect those people with a stinky negative audist attiude as far as it s too obviously someone degrades on Deaf people as well as she degraded on her own deafness without devices. la la la

 

[Sweetmind]

Shel, you admitted to NOT KNOWING why some children in your program don't seem to have benefits from the CI.
And judging by what you just wrote, I see clearly that you have no knowldge why some deaf people can speak while some not. You just see it, you don't know WHY it is.
You have no clue about their full, detailed medical history, developmental history, even psychological history. YET YOU pass these cases as "proof. What kind of proof is that? it doesn't prove anything, and it's as good as garbage, I am sorry to say because I am 100% convinced if we started to dig deeper we would find out the WHY, and that finally would make sense.

A deaf person born with severe to profound hearing loss WILL NOT learn to speak just like that!!! there must be extraordinairy circumstances for that to happen.





Really? But how WELL?
I don't believe for a minute she can speak as any normal hearing person. Heck, I don't believe she understand 2/3 of what she hears. Guesses, yes but not HEARS.
I can talk on the phone too, so what? It's not easy, I don't get everything what is said, and it is very exhausting. But for someone standing from a distance I seem to be able to "talk on the phone".

If you intend to prove a deaf person without CI is as able to communicate verbally as a deaf person without CI, first get your facts backed up by something with substance- like having your examples presented with complete detailed medical and life history of that person.

I have seen deaf people "talking on the phone". And for every ONE person who can, there is 20 that CAN'T.




If somebody says "if you start exercising your quality of life will improve" - does that automatically means your life quality was only "poor" so far? Interesting.





Excellent comparison, Cloggy. It's exactly like that.




yes, absolutely.....
not being able to hear your newborn first cry, not being able to hear the loving whispers of your loved one, not being able to hear music, not being able to participate in hearing conversation, not being able to hear your child first babbling, not being able to hear the birds sing, not being able to hear a warning bells, not being able to go to the doctor, lawyer, child's teacher, bank official, funeral director without an interpreter, having your child cry because it hurt itself and you didn't hear it calling you, feeling uncomfortably confused beacuse you can't understand when someone is talking to you, not to be able to watch any TV show because CC is not there, having everyone looking at you strangely, and many many more- it's juts terrific!!!! I love it!!!



yes, exactly - without all that we have NOTHING.




You forgot something very important - people does not communicate thru skin color, people communciate verbally and thru writting. A gesturing porvide only very limited communication.
So even those Blacks, Hispanics, Asiatics and Natives in USA must speak English if they want to communicate well with each other.






Then explain to me how does swaying leaves SOUND, how does trickling water SOUND, how does batting an eye SOUND, how does a crow crows, how does a nightingale sings... the SOUND of cat purrs...



Shel only knows her children "can or can not hear." She does not know WHY, she said that herself many times, and thus no, she she doesn't know FULLY what is she talking about.




Cloggy is talking abut an ability to HEAR, Cheri. Can you hear everything? can you in your job talk on the phone freely, talk to people from afar and without seeying their faces? You need no special accomodations?




This is the only reason Shel - you gained confidence. If you were as confident before .you would felt differently too.

Fuzzy

:bsflag: BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH Deaf parents are NOT LAZY .. . UP YOURS! AUDIOFUZZY .. you dont even know what u are talking about. since you are thinking that you are not deaf... RME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I DO NOT NEED TO HEAR and SPEAK for you however I CAN SPEAK if you mind.. HEaring people need to wear hearing devices to hear our Deaf HANDS to be heard.

YOU DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ASL that u dont even use it so LOOK AT YOURSELF as being lazy to learn and understand what s ASL all about. How s that sounds to you?

CLOGGY RME!!! Deaf will be always deaf. SO BE IT! We do not hear everything with or without devices.




I dont have any respect those people with a stinky negative audist attiude as far as it s too obviously someone degrades on Deaf people as well as she degraded on her own deafness without devices. la la la

 

[Cloggy]

"Tell the parents I said, "Help your child; you are the adult, you bear the burden of resposibility to give the child all the possibilities life can give" - Definitely not Harlan Lane

:BS: BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH Deaf parents are NOT LAZY .. . UP YOURS! AUDIOFUZZY .. ........... RME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
....................

........ la la la

:bsflag: BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH Deaf parents are NOT LAZY .. . UP YOURS! AUDIOFUZZY .. you dont even know what u are talking about. since you are thinking that you are not deaf... RME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

............

CLOGGY RME!!! ............ SO BE IT! ............ .




............ la la la

Do you realise you make no sense at all...
Get someone to translate your ASL into writing.... and post it again...

 

[Cheri]

Deaf children are not the only ones that are treated this way - anyone who's "different" in any way is subjected to bullying, rejection, teasing.

That's bologna, Anyone can get bullied, Not just those who are "different" People get bullied for all sorts of things and for no reason at all.

Just as I suspected, you don't communicate by hearing at work

Yes I do! What the hell do you know? Do you work with me? I work at my job for 16 friggin years, and yet you telling me I don't communicate by hearing at work.

 

[deafskeptic]

That's bologna, Anyone can get bullied, Not just those who are "different" People get bullied for all sorts of things and for no reason at all.

Cheri is quite correct. When I worked at one company, we had a problem with an office bully and the higher ups seemed impressed with her work. However, it was so stressful to work under her that her dept had the highest turnover rate. Turnover was higher than even a grocery store, believe me. I quit that job because it was stressful working there even though I didn't work in the office bully's dept. Her bullying wasn't limited to her dept.

 

[highlands]

There are numerous posts throughout AD where HOH students were, for instance, educated in a mainstreamed environment, yet never fully felt a part of the social environment. Likewise, many of them will also relate stories of "never quite fitting in", or never really feeling "connected", or always feeling that they were "different". Many will also relate memories of being excluded or ignored by their hearing peers, or being teased for having to ask someone to repeat themselves or having less than perfect speech skills. These people could all "hear" to some degree, but they never experienced "being hearing".

I could hear so much sounds via my has.. but I've never consider myself 'being hearing'.. I've had a wish of being more close to deaf world than hearing but this seems imposssible due to some reasons.. what a crock :| anyways,I'm trying to do fine.. I'm just me not regarding whatever world I live in

 

[Cheri]

Do you realise you make no sense at all...
Get someone to translate your ASL into writing.... and post it again...

tsk tsk Cloggy, That wasn't even polite or respectful for what you said.

 

[shel90]

"mentioned somewhere that she gained confidence only after she started participating in the deaf culture." is an excellent example how one is not fully into the hearing world when one is deaf. Just as one cannot be fully in the deaf world when hearing...

There are many hearing people who are fully in the deaf world. Since u dont participate in the deaf world, it is not surprising that u wouldnt know.

The deaf world has deaf, hoh, and hearing people of all races, sexual orienation, and with additional needs.

It is just not limited to deaf people only.

and about gaining confidence, I was denied my deafness and ASL and forced to live like a hearing person. That ruined my confidence...a CI has nothing to do with it because I dont have one and I dont think having a CI would really solve all my problems that I had in the hearing world. U and fuzzy really missed my point.

 

[shel90]

To Fuzzy..since u keep making a big stink about how I share my experiences of working with children who do not benefit from their CIs. It seems like unless I know why, I cant post about my experiences with them. Why is it important I must know why they werent able to benefit from their CIs?

I know of few reasons why kids dont benefit from their CIs

the processor doesnt work
the internal parts dont work
the family dont put in much time in AVT therapy
the therapists in AVT didnt do a good job
the child was unable to process the sounds into meaningful concepts
the child has additional needs


For those who werent able to benefit from their CIs, it could be any of those reasons the the POINT is I DONT KNOW which! I cant say "hmmm ok this child didnt benefit because of A or because of B. That's just my guess." I cant make assumptions until I get the facts and since those facts are not accessible due to policies set forth at the school.

Just because I dont know which of those reasons doesnt mean I cant post about myexperiences with them. U telling me that I shouldnt post about them makes me wonder that u want to hide the dark side of CIs? It works for many and when it does, it works great but there are those that it doesnt work for. That is a fact and I will continue to post about it as long as it is still happening.

If u dont like my posts about those children, simply ignore them but do not tell me who I can post or cant post about.

Thank you

 

[Cheri]

There are many hearing people who are fully in the deaf world.

That is very true and plus there are some schools are now offering sign language , and some hearing people are participating to learn.

 

[Lavender]

That's bologna, Anyone can get bullied, Not just those who are "different" People get bullied for all sorts of things and for no reason at all.


Yes I do! What the hell do you know? Do you work with me? I work at my job for 16 friggin years, and yet you telling me I don't communicate by hearing at work.

Both u and shel,

Can u make a video on "YouTube" show everyone proof it how much u can hear talking to hearing? I wanna see if u're bullied or not becuz I know deaf and hoh are not the same things with the way they talk to hearing.

Like this one can hear with ci.
YouTube - Kili Day 36

 

[shel90]

Both u and shel,

Can u make a video on "YouTube" show everyone proof it how much u can hear talking to hearing? I wanna see if u're bullied or not becuz I know deaf and hoh are not the same things with the way they talk to hearing.

Like this one can hear with ci.
YouTube - Kili Day 36

I dont know how to make a utube video.

I grew up in an all hering environment without knowing any sign language. How else could I communicate with them? If I couldnt, I would have been referred to the Deaf school like my brother did after it was apparent his oral skills werent sufficient enough to be placed in a hearing only environment.

I learned sign language at the age of 25 and became fluent in it around 28 years old. I use spoken language with my hubby cuz his receptive skills in ASL are weak and he uses ASL because I dont get everything with lipreading.

I watched the video..what about it? My best friend who was born profoundly deaf was on the cheerleading squad at our hearing high school for 3 years. She made up her own dances following the music to be able to be selected to be on a squad of 12 girls out of 300 girls competing. She doesnt have an implant. My husband calls my name from across the room if he needs me and I can hear it with my HAs. I go to dance clubs and can hear the music...sooo with peopel here saying without a CI, one doesnt really experience the hearing world. I find it odd cuz I grew up relying on my HAs to communicate with others. My frustration stemmed from people not meeting my deaf needs and not knowing anyone but my best friend who is deaf like me.

 

[Cheri]

Oh, now I a pathetic, am I? And what that makes YOU, hmmm??
Didn't like the tables being turned, huh? don't like seeying yourself in a mirror, huh?

That's not it, It just you don't have any original statement of your own to argue with my point of view, instead you had to replace "hearing" to "deaf" and Yes, that's pathetic.

I would kindly ask you to refrain from insulting remarks.

And you never use any insult remarks to anyone? You're not as innocent as anyone in here.

I NEVER said that hearing is the only option to have quality life

I said IF You think that hearing is the only option to have a quality life then You're an idiot. Read very carefully of the word "If"

But obviously one needs to pay attention to know what it is. and understand written English.

That's the same applies to you as well.

How come it's okay to insult and bash hearing parents only who just chose what they think it BEST for their children,

I was only telling them to get involved in sign language that can be useful in a variety of ways and I've said that more than once in many different CI threads. I've also have seen many hearing parents who won't take up the time to spare in learning signs for their child. If a child can learn to speak for them, how about going half way with them by learning signs. That's only fair don't you think?

 

[Cheri]

I dont know how to make a utube video..

Either do I.

 

[shel90]

That's not it, It just you don't have any original statement of your own to argue with my point of view, instead you had to replace "hearing" to "deaf" and Yes, that's pathetic.



And you never use any insult remarks to anyone? You're not as innocent as anyone in here.



I said IF You think that hearing is the only option to have a quality life then You're an idiot. Read very carefully of the word "If"



That's the same applies to you as well.



I was only telling them to get involved in sign language that can be useful in a variety of ways and I've said that more than once in many different CI threads. I've also have seen many hearing parents who won't take up the time to spare in learning signs for their child. If a child can learn to speak for them, how about going half way with them by learning signs. That's only fair don't you think?

Exactly! That is the same thing I am saying too. *sighs*

 

[CutePommie]

Mmmm....




Wonder who is the GOD IT IS CLOGGY OR FUZZY or even RICK48 ? Does they think we DEAF people must to HEAR? :roll:

 

[CutePommie]

Hey jillio, shel90 and cheri, they think they know better than us eh, that very sad because they do not want to know the real fact of being DEAF.

We or some of us Deaf People does have leadng into the normal life like Hearing people does,

Yet it getting very very old they keep go on on on on on on could they do anything better things to do instead of being insulting to Deaf people here ahh !
Have a good day as am very busy lady