SOCIAL SECURITY CRISIS!: The FAQ!

[Vance]

Social Security: it is in a crisis! But how bad is the crisis, and how can it be solved? Here at the Fafblog Research Institute we've compiled a handy FAQ to tell you what's what.

Q: Is Social Security in crisis?
A: Yes it is! And if we don’t do something right now it is going to EXPLODE!
Q: Oh no!
A: In forty years.
Q: Then what happens?
A: Then Social Security runs out of money! That means either your benefits are reduced, or all Social Security everywhere explodes in a giant fireball and we will have to run away from the fireball and jump away from it in slow motion to escape!
Q: Tell me more about this crisis in gritty detail!
A: The fireball is huge and loud and expensive and there is grinding guitar music on the soundtrack informing everyone that we are bad, bad dudes! The radiation turns all old people into very poor mutants who must scavenge and eat each other for food. Eventually the robots come: they are unstoppable. What has science done!
Q: I’m scared! How can we avert this terrible future?
A: There’s just one chance! We have to borrow trillions of dollars to finance transforming Social Security into a completely different system based on mandatory investments in preferred stocks.
Q: If we’re borrowing trillions of dollars, and the government already owes trillions of dollars, and the Social Security crisis is a debt problem anyway, how does this help Social Security?
A: Quick we have to act fast! We only have twenty years to go!
Q: I thought we had forty years.
A: Now we have ten! It is a ticking bomb.
Q: Oh no! In these extreme circumstances we have to privatize Social Security!
A: If we don't, the terrorists win.
Q: I’ll hold it down. You get the electrodes!
A: It’s so crazy, it just might work!

Q: I’m following you so far, but what if privatization…
A: It’s not privatization it is private accounts.
Q: Alright then, what if these private accounts…
A: They are not private accounts they are personal accounts.
Q: Okay, if these personal accounts…
A: They are not personal accounts, they are privamatupilous splendiferacy.
Q: I forgot what I was talking about.
A: Oh good! Have a lollipop with your splendiferacy.

Q: Can I see your Social Security plan?
A: No you can’t.
Q: Well, I’d really like to, before I decide to…
A: Would you really like to see the plan? Would you really, really?
Q: Yes yes I would I would, ever so much!
A: Okay then! When you go to bed tonight dreaming of private investment accounts a maaaaagical train will pull up to your window, and a maaaaagical conductor will let you on board…
Q: Oh boy!
A: And the maaaaagical train will take you to the North Pole to see Social Security Santa with your very own eyes so you can believe.
Q: Oh wow, I’d love that!
A: And he and his elves will give you your own private account which will last forever and ever. Would you like that?
Q: Yes I would, I would!
A: Well, you won’t get it, ‘cause you didn’t believe on your own!
Q: Oh no!
A: Get thee behind us! No Social Security for you!

Q: I ended up with crap stocks, and my private account went empty early. What do I do?
A: You run out of money and starve. But you’ll starve in freedom, because you OWN your empty personal account, which means you OWN your starvation!
Q: I feel so free and hungry!
A: A wise man once said it is better to live in freedom than to die in slavery … the slavery of a secure retirement.
Q: Give me liberty AND death!
A: That’s the spirit!
Q: Wheeee! *hack hack wheeze*

 

[DeafSCUBA98]

that's why having 401 K fund or any retirement fund is important these days

 

[Vance]

Scuba, I dunno if you do notice or not, they are making fun of Bush's plan about Social Security. There isn't any crisis. I posted several topics about it, they repeatedly reported that there isn't any crisis. That's why Bush stopped using a word, 'crisis' these days. Allow me quote from one of articles:

Democrats, buoyed by many economic analysts, say there is no crisis and no need to rush into a solution that could cause more problems than it solves. After all, over the past decade, the Social Security Administration has pushed back the projected date Social Security would become insolvent, from 2029 to 2042.
And even the Bush administration has pointedly refrained from using the word ``crisis'' in the past couple of weeks.

However, you are right that it does pay off to invest some $$ in 401 k and other things but along with Social Security.

 

[ravensteve1961]

Social Security has been a joke for over 70 years since FDR signed it into law. Social Security,Lets face it theres nothing secured about it. The government has all kinds of infomation files on you. And anyone can get that infomation.I think its only fair you should lie about your education record. You see jobs are very hard to get.Its unfair if they dont hire your because of your educational background. 50 years ago you didnt need a high school education to work in a factory. You didnt need a high school education to be a security officer. You didnt need a high school education to work at the telephone company. The 50s-60s were good decades for americans. So how can honesty be the best policy if you need a good paying job to keep a roof over your heads? So theres nothing secured about social security.

 

[Vance]

*yawn* I am bored with your raves, ravensteve.

Edit: ohh. I made a rhyme with rave and ravensteve! Go me!

 

[The*Empress]

I think many people should use SSI... until they empty the Social Security
and Government's pockets...

Then that way Government will have to rethink of something...
like...

1. Stop sending jobs overseas.
2. Make Businesses hired many deaf people and other disabled people.