Should people be shunned for not living up to their potential?

Mimsy said:
Then I'd better start looking for a rich husband, quick!

Just joking about the husband, but damn life is hard.

Laura, I guess they see my brothers having good jobs and they know (and I know) I won't be able to have my own apartment here in Manhattan on a tech salary. I'm in my dishwasher mood this evening.

Yes, therapy and medication for my specific issues...covered.

So I gather from all the comments that it's not right to put someone down for "not living up to their potential", BUT it IS right to remind them about the practicalities of surviving independently and making a living.

Good advice and comments from all.
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Jesus, Manhattan?? Find a nice wealthy Italian guy and settle down! :D Seriously, Mimsy, unless you're a professional, there's no way in Hell anyone could afford Manhattan without living with six of their best friends....hang in there, I can't afford to not live with my parents and I'm 44 - you'll do better than me in no time. :)

Laura
 
Mimsy said:
Then there's no way to compare me to Good Will Hunting! I'm no genius, just a fast learner.

The funny thing is in the dishwasher thread, I said I sometimes dream about being a dishwasher and the heck with school, but those are the times when I'm feeling stressed and just want to escape life's hassles.
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sorry - a correction on my part. He wasn't a natural born genius like a rain man lol. he was a fast learner. he can read a book one time and memorize it.

his only flaw is his short hindsight. that's why his shrink made him see the big picture and he finally got it.
 
Jiro said:
sorry - a correction on my part. He wasn't a natural born genius like a rain man lol. he was a fast learner. he can read a book one time and memorize it.

his only flaw is his short hindsight. that's why his shrink made him see the big picture and he finally got it.
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rain man isnt a natural born genius either, he's a savant, a genius stuck in an autistic state of being, based on a real life Kim Peek.
 
No. It depends on your situation.

I was recently presented with a similar problem.

On one hand, I had a so-so job where I lived (bad pay, good people), an ok lifestyle, and an unsafe but doable retirement plan.

However I had the option of going to school hours away from home to get a degree that would enable me to get a higher paying job with a better retirement option, even though it would probably decrease the amount of free time I had at home by a lot.

The day job I had paid the bills, and it allowed me to eat on a regular basis. I used the free time I had to paint and improve my house.
But if I get a better job by getting a better degree, I can hire someone to improve my house, and well, I guess I wouldn't be painting as much.

On one hand I wanted to continue working my day job and paint (Who's to say my destiny isn't to become a great painter?), but on the other hand I knew I wouldn't be young forever -- one day I would really appreciate being able to retire! Also I wanted to see how far I could get in that career field.


I chose to get the degree and work towards my second career, but I don't think anyone would've thought I was underselling myself if I continued to work my mundane day job & paint in my free time.

It's just that I preferred income stability over a chance at fame & fortune.


I think even in the given example, there are other things to consider, such as if maybe he can't relocate to get his dream job because his spouse can't relocate, or perhaps being a paralegal is more enjoyable work, or perhaps it pays better for less work, or has a higher demand... etc.

There's a lot of factors to consider, internal and external.
 
I would be disappointed but I wouldnt shun them, if they were family then theyre family forever.
 
Mimsy, you are forgetting one thing:

If you get your vet tech degree and certificate and job experience, and decide later to become a full-fledged vet, you will actually be in a better position, knowing that you are in a field that you like.

Some of the best doctors were first nurses. Some of the best teachers were once paraprofessionals in the schools. All school principals were once teachers. Some of the best lawyers were once paralegals.

Take it one stage at a time, you don't have to go full-bore ahead. And explain it to your ambitious parents exactly that way.
 
MCB said:
Mimsy, you are forgetting one thing:

If you get your vet tech degree and certificate and job experience, and decide later to become a full-fledged vet, you will actually be in a better position, knowing that you are in a field that you like.

Some of the best doctors were first nurses. Some of the best teachers were once paraprofessionals in the schools. All school principals were once teachers. Some of the best lawyers were once paralegals.

Take it one stage at a time, you don't have to go full-bore ahead. And explain it to your ambitious parents exactly that way.
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As a teacher, I feel ready to move on to be a policy maker for the Dept of Ed in Dc.

U are right about the bolded above...
 
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