Imagine you are blind, have never seen anything, are you going to automatically know what everything you see is? No- you have to learn. I think it is similar with listening in that the first time you hear you are not going to know what everything is- you have to learn. I know again some will disagree with me- and that is okay. I have a deaf son who I chose to get CIs for as hearing aids provided him with no benefit, he is profoundly deaf. He can now hear softer sound at 18 months old than his father can hear. It is wonderful for him. I sign with him, but I do primarily do verbal communication and expect him to do the same. If he is 18 and chosses not to wear them at that point, that is his decision. But, at leat then he will have learned how to talk and listen therefore can choose which lifestyle he wants.
I'm not blind, but quite near-sighted. I remember the very first time I got glasses, when I was about 8 years old. My third-grade teacher told my mom that I couldn't read the blackboard when I was seated in the back of the room.
Those new glasses - WOW! So THIS is what seeing is all about! I could see the individual leaves on trees - never knew that was possible. When there was a metal transition strip on the floor, from a carpeted area to a tiled area, WOW! It was as if it were right smack in front of me! I had to hold my mom's arm because I was afraid I would trip over this huge thing. The same huge thing that had just been a blur before, and caused me no problems.
Clearly I had needed glasses for a while.
Definitely I went through a bit of a process of learning how to see and learning how to judge distances all over again.
Hearing aids were much the same way. I was an adult, not a child, but I had to learn what various sounds were (the hum of the fridge, for instance), what sounds were normal, what sounds meant "Pay attention! Your car is making weird noises!"
Willsmom, sounds to me like you are doing just fine by your son. Please don't be scared off by others who went in a different direction. You are giving your son wonderful access that he would not have had before this technology came along. Eventually, as you said, he can make up his own mind if he wants to use it or not, but you have given him the gift of choice. Sounds like a good thing to me.