http://www.weeklyworldnews.com/features/politics/61676
BUSH ORDERS CAPE & CROWN
Prez calls for amendment to allow royal titles
By T.D. JENKINS
With his controversial $500 million inaugural ball behind him, President George W. Bush has dropped another financial bombshell -- he's shelling out $82.5 million for a jewel-studded crown and sabletrimmed cape to wear during his second term in office.
And when new Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice pointed out that the Constitution bans blueblood titles, he snapped, "Heck, let's change it. Get me an amendment so I can be called 'Your Highness.' "
Insiders add that the Commander in Chief bristles at the suggestion that the traditional trappings of European monarchs send the wrong message to the American people, 40 million of whom live in grinding poverty.
"I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I earned political capital in my landslide election victory last November and I'm going to spend it any way I like."
Bush even went ballistic at his pet cabinet member, Condoleezza, when she noted that royal titles are banned by the Constitution and questioned the wisdom of buying the finery during a daily briefing in the Oval Office.
"The President can dress as he pleases, and I'm the President," Bush griped. "And just because I'll be wearing a cape and crown doesn't mean I'm going to govern any differently or that I consider myself to be better than the peons who elected me.
"I'll use my mandate the way I always have -- to make rich Americans richer by reuniting them with all the tax money we've been throwing away on poor people who claim they need 'food for their babies' and 'a place to live.'
"If you don't like it, Condi, why don't you move to Sri Lanka and see if you like it any better in tsunamiland? Don't forget your water wings."
The 24-karat gold crown Bush found in a London, England, "monarchy supply house" catalog is studded with over 200 diamonds, rubies, emeralds and sapphires that spell out the President's nickname, "DUBYA," in large letters on the front, and in smaller letters on the back, "FOREVER."
The headpiece retails for a staggering $95 million, but it was on sale for $82.5 million -- a sum the Republican-controlled Congress quietly tacked on to a bill authorizing the expenditure of $1,247 to buy a flak jacket for a platoon of unprotected Marines to share in Iraq.
The blood red, hand-stitched, crushed-velvet cape was just $117,000, a sum the President paid out of his "discretionary fund," or, as he likes to call it, "petty cash."
In a surprising nod to political correctness, the President chose a cape with detachable sable trim that will enable him to "pop off the fur" when animal- rights groups visit the White House, a highly placed insider says.
"The crown and cape will be delivered early next month and the President is planning to invite a few thousand of his closest friends and biggest contributors to Washington for the official 'unveiling,' " continues the source.
BUSH ORDERS CAPE & CROWN
Prez calls for amendment to allow royal titles
By T.D. JENKINS
With his controversial $500 million inaugural ball behind him, President George W. Bush has dropped another financial bombshell -- he's shelling out $82.5 million for a jewel-studded crown and sabletrimmed cape to wear during his second term in office.
And when new Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice pointed out that the Constitution bans blueblood titles, he snapped, "Heck, let's change it. Get me an amendment so I can be called 'Your Highness.' "
Insiders add that the Commander in Chief bristles at the suggestion that the traditional trappings of European monarchs send the wrong message to the American people, 40 million of whom live in grinding poverty.
"I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I earned political capital in my landslide election victory last November and I'm going to spend it any way I like."
Bush even went ballistic at his pet cabinet member, Condoleezza, when she noted that royal titles are banned by the Constitution and questioned the wisdom of buying the finery during a daily briefing in the Oval Office.
"The President can dress as he pleases, and I'm the President," Bush griped. "And just because I'll be wearing a cape and crown doesn't mean I'm going to govern any differently or that I consider myself to be better than the peons who elected me.
"I'll use my mandate the way I always have -- to make rich Americans richer by reuniting them with all the tax money we've been throwing away on poor people who claim they need 'food for their babies' and 'a place to live.'
"If you don't like it, Condi, why don't you move to Sri Lanka and see if you like it any better in tsunamiland? Don't forget your water wings."
The 24-karat gold crown Bush found in a London, England, "monarchy supply house" catalog is studded with over 200 diamonds, rubies, emeralds and sapphires that spell out the President's nickname, "DUBYA," in large letters on the front, and in smaller letters on the back, "FOREVER."
The headpiece retails for a staggering $95 million, but it was on sale for $82.5 million -- a sum the Republican-controlled Congress quietly tacked on to a bill authorizing the expenditure of $1,247 to buy a flak jacket for a platoon of unprotected Marines to share in Iraq.
The blood red, hand-stitched, crushed-velvet cape was just $117,000, a sum the President paid out of his "discretionary fund," or, as he likes to call it, "petty cash."
In a surprising nod to political correctness, the President chose a cape with detachable sable trim that will enable him to "pop off the fur" when animal- rights groups visit the White House, a highly placed insider says.
"The crown and cape will be delivered early next month and the President is planning to invite a few thousand of his closest friends and biggest contributors to Washington for the official 'unveiling,' " continues the source.
