Buckrogers and momoftwo, let me share with you in the mixture of both of you. Hope I make it clear for you two. Buck, get angry with God will not make you getting better or get you anywhere. Remember, Job? Look the comparison between him and you,, he's been thru severe life challenged. He's been going thru teremendous emotional strained, struggles, painful experience and also been judgemental by others and even his wife make him curse God. But he was steadfast. All of us in some ways what we want instead of what we need. But, I don't know you personally, go to Him, don't expect everything comes out overnight. Learn to rely on Him. I myself going thru so much, my ex in laws torned my marriage apart and now, severely control my ex wife and my kids and ignore my family's feeling and cry and encouraged them to hate me, but my family refuse bec they love me dearly as I to them. During severely stress by in laws control and my wife wouldn't dare to stand up cause me lead astray. Does that mean I did it right? No, worse, what's the problem with me? I focus on problems than giving all the problems to God. I blame God, no. So, Buck, go to Him and don't hold bitter or self pity party, just Go to Him. Now, momoftwo, for being deaf doesn't mean we sin more than anyone. Remember, the blind man? Remember His disciples asked who sinned that cause him blind himself or his parents? He answered and said, neither, it is the purpose of God and for His glory to reveal. Even in the book of Law says, do not curse the deaf or mistreating them. Better be deaf to the world views than being deaf to God. True, momoftwo, God is love proof thru His Son Jesus. Smile