Help me, please?

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skm4441

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Hey folks,

There is a girl that I like... I want to talk to her but I don't how or where I should start... Does anybody have a brilliant idea or suggestion? Any input is much appreciated. Thanks!
 
Ok....

"Girl" ?? that you re teenage and school? :dunno2: Anyway

If yes at school...

First, wave "Hi" to her few times and see if she respond back hi to you? If yes then after Hi and tell what is weather today or something news then will become warm up to chat?

Good luck! ;)
 
What do you mean by this...

"Girl" ?? that you re teenage and school?
 
Hmm, I guess finding a courage isn't an easy thing to do.

I am curious as of where did you see that girl at? At school? At workplace? At church?
What is your communication mode? Ie: You are deaf and she's not or whatever.

But as what Phillips said sounds good. Just walk to her and intro. yourself. From that, you can either start quickly, like saying "You see...I've always like you and umm... I am wondering if we can go out on date?"

Or start slowly by saying "What classes are you taking?" "Oh cool. My favorite is (subject) and what's yours?" (Getting to know each other, like what you will do with your friends.)

Or if it's not at school. "What do you think of weather today? It's really nice (or ugly) outside, isn't it?" "What do you like to do for free time?" "Oh? That sounds fun, perhaps we can do that together sometimes?" (Trying to find something that encourage more questions and curiosity from both sides and that fits the environment you are in.)
 
skm4441 said:
Hey folks,

There is a girl that I like... I want to talk to her but I don't how or where I should start... Does anybody have a brilliant idea or suggestion? Any input is much appreciated. Thanks!
Click to expand...

Are you male or female? In other gay thread,you mentioned that you re lesbian. If that is true, she might be not ready to come out like you re already. My gay brother didn't come until he's 18 yrs old. It s tough to be queer in high school.
 
lumbingmi said:
Are you male or female? In other gay thread,you mentioned that you re lesbian. If that is true, she might be not ready to come out like you re already. My gay brother didn't come until he's 18 yrs old. It s tough to be queer in high school.
Click to expand...

Or it must be tough to be gay in your family with the kind of language you are labeling your brother.

No offense Lumbingmi but you can show a little compassion for your brother. Afterall, he is your flesh and blood.
 
Byrdie714 said:
Or it must be tough to be gay in your family with the kind of language you are labeling your brother.

No offense Lumbingmi but you can show a little compassion for your brother. Afterall, he is your flesh and blood.
Click to expand...

Huh? What are you talking about? I was there for him when he came out and supported him all the way. Hell, I went to gay clubs and gay pride parade many times.

What s your problem?

Edit: it s fact that it s tough to be gay in high school. it isn't easy as you can ask other gay people.
 
That's because the word 'queer' was frequently used as a derogatory term for effeminate and/or gay males, and others exhibiting untraditional gender behavior.

I guess it's just not a good word of choice.
 
Silentwolfdog said:
That's because the word 'queer' was frequently used as a derogatory term for effeminate and/or gay males, and others exhibiting untraditional gender behavior.

I guess it's just not a good word of choice.
Click to expand...

Nope. I asked my brother if queer is inappropriate word. He said no because it depends on what s context.

Example: "you are so queer!" or "that is so queer!" coupling with sneering or mockery facial expression

If you re saying, "My friend is queer." or "I wish I am queer too". It is fine and not derogatory to gay people.
 
True that it depends on how you used it in the sentence. But I am not going to use it, because it just causes too much confusion. What is okay with one person is hurtful to other person.

It's just double standard. Even if I was a black person I am not going to use the "n" word with other black person just because I am black and it's okay. Especially if white people can't use it without make a black person angry.

Also, I am not going to use the word "queer" because I did not like the define of it and the way it was being apply to homosexual people.

It's like people calling hearing impaired people who can't speak, "deaf and dumb" even though they didn't mean it as in a stupid, but as mute.

That's just me. But it's not surprising how other people reacted the way they did when they read your post.
 
Just let's agree to disagree.

Anyway, back to the topic.

It might be a different story if you are a female who likes that girl. Is she into girls as well?
I can't say much now because it's not in my territory. Hopefully someone that is in the same shoes as you are will post some suggestions.
 
Silentwolfdog said:
\It might be a different story if you are a female who likes that girl. Is she into girls as well?
I can't say much now because it's not in my territory. Hopefully someone that is in the same shoes as you are will post some suggestions.
Click to expand...

I m saying it ain't easy to be queer in high school. My best advice is to wait out until you graduate from the high school whereas you dont have to deal with homophobia in real world. I promise you that real world or outside of high school is indeed greener pasture. :)
 
Every simple introduction begins with "Hello" or "Hi". After that, introduce yourselves and the rest is history! :)
 
skm4441 said:
Hey folks,

There is a girl that I like... I want to talk to her but I don't how or where I should start... Does anybody have a brilliant idea or suggestion? Any input is much appreciated. Thanks!
Click to expand...

If you like this girl, then talk to her, get to know her, ask her questions about her--what she likes, what her hobbies are, what she likes to do for fun. Just like how you get to know a person.

then if you still like her after getting to know her better, then start asking her out on a date. ;) Good luck to you.
 
lumbingmi said:
Are you male or female? In other gay thread,you mentioned that you re lesbian. If that is true, she might be not ready to come out like you re already. My gay brother didn't come until he's 18 yrs old. It s tough to be queer in high school.
Click to expand...

I'm a female. And um, the girl is the president of the gay straight alliance at the college I'm attending... I know I'm overgeneralizing here but she may be gay, maybe not...
 
skm4441 said:
I'm a female. And um, the girl is the president of the gay straight alliance at the college I'm attending... I know I'm overgeneralizing here but she may be gay, maybe not...
Click to expand...

Um my bad. I thought you are high school student. sorry. :(
 
skm4441 said:
I'm a female. And um, the girl is the president of the gay straight alliance at the college I'm attending... I know I'm overgeneralizing here but she may be gay, maybe not...
Click to expand...
Then that's the problem. If you don't know if she's gay, then why keep your distance? Like I said before, you can start a conversation with a simple "hello" or "hi" and then go from there. You'll find out a lot about her in that short conversation with her if you know what to say. Since you said that she's the president of a club, that's a good place to start... by attending a meeting or two to see how she interacts with people. Who knows, you might see her girlfriend there too. If so, then you know she's taken and you can move on with someone else. :)

Let's suppose I'm gay and I like this guy who's the president of a GLBT organization. I could assume that he's gay since he's part of that organization, but I've seen white people on the eboard of black organizations and a straight student advisor for a GLBT organization. So, I shouldn't assume too quickly. Anyways, I attend this meeting to make myself possibly seen as well as having something to talk about afterwards. When the meeting is over, I approach the president and tell him, "Hi." I tell him how he seemed to do well running the meeting and how I enjoyed the meeting. "Oh, I forgot to add... my name is Ben. I'm majoring in graphic design. What about you?" "Oh, my name is Jack. I'm also majoring in graphic design too." "Really? I haven't seen you around lately. Been here long? I'm guessing you have since you are president and have earned the respect of your peers." "Oh, not really." "No? How did you come to be in this club anyway?" "Oh, my ex-boyfriend convinced me to join." "Oh, your 'ex'? Sorry about that. At least you remained stable and stayed here with the club." "Thanks. Well, I better go to class."

Well, from that short conversation (yes, I've actually learned this much from a short conversation like this before)... I've learned that he's gay or bi, is in the same major as I am, possibly supports others (he supported his ex-boyfriend when he was invited), is probably single, and is likely a good leader (he's president). Wow, I've learned a lot from that conversation. I started it with a simple "hi" and went with the flow. I didn't get too nosy since he was the one who brought up the ex-boyfriend thing. Also, mentioning your name and major is a common introductory line between college students.
 
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