Had suicidal thoughts before?

^Angel^ said:
Me either, but I saw the others did, so I said why not :lol:

Get it all out girl, then you will feel better once you do, if you're not ready, then don't because you can only do this if you're really ready to....


No one gonna to judge ya cause I won't :hug:
Click to expand...


Sorry, you misunderstand my post... It´s my fault for not clear my post... which I mean is I haven´t done like this before...

I see no problem to open anything to share with anyone here if I have an experience but I haven´t... I never try anything in my life... honestly...

I open to share about my experience with my family etc. in my other threads... which it mean I share my experience with you all for your feedback...

I do not worry either anyone judge, feedback, disagree, agree, etc. etc. etc. with me... I´m open mind... You has no fear to open what you think of my posts... :laugh2:
 
Arrgghhh!

Doesn't want think look back over my shoulder where I was belongs young hood years!

No Thanks you..
*shrugs*
Too quite painful for me being emotions goes thru hell...

(cries)
Sorry.. doesn't want look this thread EVER AGAIN!
 
TweetyBird said:
thanks... :hug: if if he touch me, i have ready baseball bat here.. i dont play game!!!! i am serious...



let me tell u what... last yr in march, he made me so angry and fed up with him shyt... cuz of my mom almost bought me new 2005 blue car but he blah to her and turned down.. her money not his money!!!! cuz of she won from caniso and earn money to bought me car for my bday.. so somehow he got me piss off and my mom was in kitchen, i lost my mind and hitted his right eye and he lost balance, my mom saw whole it... my hands were shake and sooo mad! so mom pulled me in my room, calmed me down... first time hitted him in 25 yrs that i been suffer!!!! so he got black eye for one week.. after that he not talk me that much.. leave me alone...
Click to expand...

:jaw: wow you are so brave to punch him to give him have a black eye :giggle: that is great !! give him a learn his lesson hehe
 
Wow, you guys had been through alot. Especially you TB, Angel, Cheryl and the others. Sorry to hear that you had to go through that shit.


For me, suicidal thoughts.... yah i did, more than once too, actually I have alot of sucidal thoughts, and attempted to do it several times, Been to hospital three times for overdose.

I also had played around with ropes and anything to strangle myself and hanging (back when i was 14 or 15 and depressed, but not ready to kill myself).

Self Injury, many time, in fact still do. Most self injury i do is cutting.
 
yes i have, it was mainly low self esteem problems, and not getting along with my sister at the time. I wrote poems, songs, and listened to music to keep those thoughts away. When i was in 11th grade thats when i realized i needed God. I heard from a leader a couple years after iwas saved that God brings the lonely and the miserable to serve him. I'm probably not wording it right ,but i thought that was interesting and weird.
 
I did think abt suicidal. But I DID, starched my arms to deeply and leaving them to become scars plus, did cut myself arms with knife plus razor for shaving my legs, cut them few too. I did that for no reasons sometime but few times, I did it becuase I was not happy in the past. But Im glad that all of you are alright and still here. :hug:
 
I only want to suicide because of the way I look.... I don't want to look like this.

Tousi is right, don't ever have anybody to have power over you.

I wouldn't suicide over some dumb man cheating on me.
 
Miss*Pinocchio said:
I only want to suicide because of the way I look.... I don't want to look like this.

Tousi is right, don't ever have anybody to have power over you.

I wouldn't suicide over some dumb man cheating on me.
Click to expand...


Miss Picocchoi,

I kindly disagree with your thought about " I wouldn't suicide over some dumb man cheating on me", as for me, I wouldn't either. But it is depend on some people's experience. Sometimes being in love can be dangerous. We can't always say " I wouldn't " it is just that some people who can't take when they find a horrified news. Some aders who expressed his/her feelings that they were distressed by finding out their bf/gf or husband/wife was cheating. A lot of times they sacrifice for each other by trusting, money, timing, abuses (physical, emotional and mental) and etc. When someone is having a relationship, it based on trust, timing, space, and finanical, most of times, relationship is also about sacrifices, compromise, and loyaltyl.

When it comes to a person who finds out about his/her man/woman is violating the trust. It falls down and it brings them to distressing emotion, and mental.... and unforunately, physical by taking pills or hurting our bodies. It is depends on a person who can take it or not. Some people are chemically imbalance by their mental, emotional and physical. Therefore, we can't always say " I wouldn't "

People who are being suidical by thinking or doing it, is somewhat called illness. Because people who are required to see a doctor, taking medicine to balance their emotion, mental and physical. Maybe they are required to be placed to the hospital until they are able to control their own feelings or to understand their own struggles that they can fight or not. It is always good idea to talk it out about our struggles, emotions, mental and physical. It is not good idea to be alone or subside our feelings/struggles.

I am a victim of being suicidal. It is not always easy to cure our thought/illnesses. It takes time to heal them. I could go on and on by explaining my experiences but I would have to write a book!

To those who experience the thought of killing ourselves, you are in my prayers. Hopefully we all can beat it. We wouldn't want to be murderers of our own lives.
 
Yeah, I have thought of committing suicide but I have thought twice and it's not worth doing it. It mostly happened in my teenage years. I do want an adventure thru everything and learn and become stronger!
 
It isn't worth dying for a man who cheat on you.
It is old news, and men will do whatever they want.
And it is part of life.
Let them have cakes and eat it too.

If man cheats on me, I won't cry or breakdown, I'm gonna go shopping, order chinese foods, and go home and watch rental movie.

:smash:
 
Bewitched said:
Miss Picocchoi,

people who can't take when they find a horrified news. Some aders who expressed his/her feelings that they were distressed by finding out their bf/gf or husband/wife was cheating. A lot of times they sacrifice for each other by trusting, money, timing, abuses (physical, emotional and mental) and etc. When someone is having a relationship, it based on trust, timing, space, and finanical, most of times, relationship is also about sacrifices, compromise, and loyaltyl.
Click to expand...

I won't put my 100% trust on a man.
It just like putting 100% trust on a babysitter.

If I get a boyfriend, I will have to expect it and avoid being surprise and be traumatize. Because he is a human being.

I don't even trust myself sometimes, I might cheat too. :P :whip:
 
Wow.. I read this whole thread! I hope this doesn't bring too much pain for you guys when I brought this up.

for those who have tried it, I'm very glad you all are still alive! We have our difficult moments when we think.. this is the end of the world for me.. but we thought hard about this.. and now we have something to be thankful for! IS HAVING ANOTHER CHANCE AT LIFE!

I've had 3 of my friends that commit suicide and didn't make it. It makes me sad when I think about them.

Thank you all for sharing this.. this has made me stronger by reading this. I feel that I have a really strong bond with most of you and it helps me stay positive besides that.. my daughter and fiance keeps me going and stay positive as well!
 
Liebling:-))) said:
Oh my dear... I can´t beleive after read the whole posts here... :( You all have my :hug:

Rebelgirl, I had the feeling after read your first post that it´s paxil anti-depression drugs, you took... Right? If yes, I thought so because paxil is very dangerous and could get people aggressive and commit sucidee.

Cheri & Rebelgirl, I can image how you feel after witnessed your ex-bf in bed with other girls.. It must be awful shock for you both... :( :hug:

Tweentybirdie, I can´t beleive after read your post that step-dad come first to your mother before you... I would not do that because my children come first. I can´t beleive your mother do that to you... Why can´t the Staff do something like report to CPS then they can file a lawsuit against your step-dad. Your mother has a low self-esteem... I´m sorry to tell this to you about your mother... I feel bad for you how you suffer... I know what it´s alike because I had been through with step-dad but he didn´t touch my part but force us to take off our clothes for him to watch us and play himself... He also forced us to watch him sex with my mom... It´s bad experience for me, Sue & Mike. I can understand how you feel after read your posts... You have my :hug:
Click to expand...

:shock: yes, you are correct, it was paxil cr for anti-depressant and valium for anxiety.

why the hell did my dr give me that for when she knew it was dangerous???? by the way, I quit taking it cold turkey and it made me sick for a week. it could have killed me. but I no longer take it anymore since 2 years now. I feel so much better and got my soul back and know who I am. I have more friends than I had before.

I have my days when I feel soooo down for no reason, I get really cranky at times when I tried not to feel that way but I do. I get anxieties alot but gotta say.. this computer relaxes me. Playing softball relaxes me too but I don't play everyday.

:ily: to you all!
 
Miss*Pinocchio said:
I won't put my 100% trust on a man.
It just like putting 100% trust on a babysitter.

If I get a boyfriend, I will have to expect it and avoid being surprise and be traumatize. Because he is a human being.

I don't even trust myself sometimes, I might cheat too. :P :whip:
Click to expand...


Since you won't put your trust ... it is your choice.. It is our choice if we attempt to hurt ourselves but you can't just compare your life to ours. It isn't right. All of us have different reasons to attempt. If you don't want to, then you should be grateful for your own confidence to keep you alive.

I am sure that many of us who have tried for suicide are being thankful that we are able to continue to go on our own adventure like Sequioa (sp?) said.

Please dont try to bring all of those pessimtic messages here. We are here to understand and uplift one another. k?
 
RebelGirl said:
:shock: yes, you are correct, it was paxil cr for anti-depressant and valium for anxiety.

why the hell did my dr give me that for when she knew it was dangerous???? by the way, I quit taking it cold turkey and it made me sick for a week. it could have killed me. but I no longer take it anymore since 2 years now. I feel so much better and got my soul back and know who I am. I have more friends than I had before.

I have my days when I feel soooo down for no reason, I get really cranky at times when I tried not to feel that way but I do. I get anxieties alot but gotta say.. this computer relaxes me. Playing softball relaxes me too but I don't play everyday.

:ily: to you all!
Click to expand...


Thats really interesting. After my attempt, I was admitted to hospital and Dr. had ordered me to take two different medicine. When I was using it, I was a completely different person. My husband said that I was like a zombie. And I knew I could heal without taking medicine. Those medicine was making my brain go jello. When someone shut the door,... my head would spin!! It was annoying and it was not comfortable. I stopped taking it. It was two years ago. Now... since it has been two years, my brain is still having some reaction from those pills. It takes about 2 to 3 yrs to go back to normal. I hate it! I can't wait for not having those reactions!

I have something to do that relaxes me... too! I spend time teaching ASL and doing crafts! ;)
 
of course, who doesn't? I sure did thought about killing myself real badly but hah, it aint happening for me. its toooo inevitable for me tog grow α hunch for this sucidial thoughts to come true.


Everytime I sat on the couch, I seen the pill in capulet bottle stand there in front. I wanted to swallow them all, but don't have α gut to do it.

Everytime I lay in my bed by my window on 2nd floor apartment, wishing I cld jump out and fall flat on the ground. but can't do it.

Whenever I saw the knife laying on the counter, I'd want to take it with me and sneak to bathroom to cutting myself on the arms, wrist, or anywhere. but won't do it.

I must have loved myself way too much to die for no reason of why should I kill myself. :aw:
 
Bewitched said:
Since you won't put your trust ... it is your choice.. It is our choice if we attempt to hurt ourselves but you can't just compare your life to ours. It isn't right. All of us have different reasons to attempt. If you don't want to, then you should be grateful for your own confidence to keep you alive.

I am sure that many of us who have tried for suicide are being thankful that we are able to continue to go on our own adventure like Sequioa (sp?) said.

Please dont try to bring all of those pessimtic messages here. We are here to understand and uplift one another. k?
Click to expand...

I just want you guys to look at a brighter side.....
Just like that man who lost everything, lost house, and lost job because of hurricane katrina, and so he killed his son, wife, and self.
I might not know what it is like to work hard for everything and lost it all.

I am not trying to be pesstimistic....
I want you guys to see from my point of view... And God's point of view.

Having a man or a woman in your arm or having values and material things don't matter...

You are here, good health, and we got people who love us and will take care of us.
There are people who are less fortunate than we are....

So what if you were molested, but it is better than be 3rd degree burn all over your body.

So what your ex boyfriend cheated on you or you lost someone you love...
But you can always find somebody else better.
But if you kill yourself then you can't ever come back to life.

Reason why I am still alive is because I felt if I kill myself then I won't ever get back my life.
But if I don't kill myself, I can go to the best facial reconstructive doctor to make me look beautiful.

:wiggle:
 
Yes,I thought about committing suicide in the past.. It was because I had trouble with my university and my hard of hearing status had turned my life out to be a 'nightmare'.. Besides I was in love but love had made me sad and depressed.. All of those thoughts directed me to think about suicide .. At that time dying would appear to me like a nice friend.. I dreamed of dying.. In the end, I had decided that living was much more meaningful than dying...so I left thinking about suicide.. and I believe in God and he forbids us to commit suicide.. He hasn't created us to kill ourselves.. and KILLING MYSELF ISN'T THE VICTORY BUT THE DISASTER.
 
Wow, so many of you have/had thoughts... well, I hestitated to post here because I am that sentitive about myself and for others. I feel for you guys. :hug: You're not alone because I have had thoughts about it, too. I was in emotional abused relationship with my ex-fiance. I still have issues with low self-esteem and confidence in myself. My hubby loves me for who I am and we have a beautiful daughter together which keeps me going. Also, I am thankful that I have very few close friends that I can confide in with.
 
Ah 3 or 4 yrs ago I was told my mom that I feel like to kill myself and my mom yelled at me said NO! DONT DO IT THIS! cause no one around me. I dont like being kill myself caue it would be painful and it stupid to said kill myself nah .. I rather stay alive to see everywhere cause I was desspersion and upset that it all.. I do still sometime get desspersion which I hate underactive thyoird hehe not easy :lol:
 
Back
Top