Changing a Light Bulb

[Liebling:-)))]

How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Charismatic: Only one. Hands already in the air.

Pentecostal: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.

Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve
the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one tomix the drinks, and one to talk
about how much better the old one was.

Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need
for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work
for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about
your light bulb for the next Sunday service in which we will explore a number of light
bulb traditions, including: incandescent, fluorescent three way, long-life and tinted, all
of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are
loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church-wide lighting service is
planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.

Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish: What's a light bulb?

 

[deafclimber]

ha ha ha

 

[linneaelliott]

lol, that is too funny.

 

[Levonian]

And how many Jewish mothers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None—they’d rather sit around in the dark and suffer.

 

[FeistyChick]

And how many Jewish mothers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None—they’d rather sit around in the dark and suffer.

HUH??? u mean those orthodox ones? eh?

 

[apathrev]

How many Agnostics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They're not sure if the light bulb exists.

 

[Nesmuth]

It takes 29 people to change a light bulb at Disneyland!

To change a light bulb at Disneyland in the 80's - 90's when I worked there.

( This is true! )

1) employee sees light bulb out tells foreman.

2) foreman verifies the bulb is dead and fills out a 'shop work request' (SWR) and hands it to the lead forman.

3) lead foreman approves SWR and hands it to the messenger

4) messenger takes it to the area supervisor

5) area supervisor signs the SWR and hands it to different messenger

6) messenger takes it to the area manager

7) area manager signs SWR and hands it to a messenger again

8) messenger takes the SWR to the theme park officer

9) theme park officer signs and hands it to the messenger

10) messenger takes it to finance manager

11) finance manager hands SWR to a finance employee to approve costs

12) finance employee aproves costs and signs SWR and hands it back to finance manager

13) finance manager signs the SWR hands it to the messenger

14) messenger takes SWR to the maintennance manager

15) maintennance manager signs it and hands it to a maintennance employee

16) maintennance employee takes SWR to the stock warehouse employee

17) stock warehouse employee retrieves new light bulb from inventory and hands it to maintennance employee who then performs the light bulb changing job and informs the lead foreman

18) lead foreman signs SWR stating job done and gives the yellow copy to maintennance employee who takes it to his department secretary (19) for records while the lead foreman hands the other copies of SWR to the messenger

20) messenger takes it to the area supervisor

21) area supervisor signs the SWR and hands it to different messenger

22) messenger takes it to the area manager

23) area manager signs and hands SWR to messenger

24) messenger takes SWR to finance department manager

25) finance department manager hands SWR to finance employee to transfer costs from location account to maintennance account and makes report and hands it to messenger

26) messenger takes report to area mangager

27) area manager signs report and gives it to the messenger

28) messenger takes report to area supervisor

29) area supervisor signs it into his records

The magic of Disneyland means it takes 29 people to change a light bulb.

We all know Disneyland is full of lightbulbs everywhere and each of those bulbs takes 29 people to replace!

What u think of that?

Richard

 

[PurrMeow]

How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Charismatic: Only one. Hands already in the air.

Pentecostal: Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.

Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve
the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians: Three. One to call the electrician, one tomix the drinks, and one to talk
about how much better the old one was.

Mormons: Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need
for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work
for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about
your light bulb for the next Sunday service in which we will explore a number of light
bulb traditions, including: incandescent, fluorescent three way, long-life and tinted, all
of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are
loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Church-wide lighting service is
planned for Sunday. Bring bulb of your choice and a covered dish.

Nazarene: Six. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans: None. Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish: What's a light bulb?

 

[VamPyroX]

That's a great one! Hehehe!