PaintedRain
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- Nov 13, 2011
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I’d like to know how and why ya’ll, if any, became voice-off. Was it a conscious decision or did it just happen over time? I’m late deafened and find myself becoming more and more uncomfortable with my speech. I’ve been struggling with the decision to become voice-off for about a year now mainly because most of the people I know now knew me when I was hearing, so for me to just turn my voice off, I feel as if I’d be doing them a disservice or that I’m being rude to them since they know I CAN talk and would just be making it harder on them.
When becoming voice-off did you tell people that’s what you were doing or did it just sort of happen at some point? I’m not necessarily saying I want to become completely voice-off, I just want to find a place at which I’m comfortable. If that means turning my speech off completely, then so be it. However, I would like to keep my speech as much as possible in case of emergencies or if I decide I want to be able to talk later. I’ve never really been told how fast I’d lose my speech if I stopped using it so that worries me a little bit.
My thought was to just start out slowly and go from there. I’ve noticed one of the hardest places for me is anywhere with cashiers or when I go to the pharmacy. They always like to chit chat or ask questions and then they seem to get upset when I don’t reply even after telling them I’m Deaf. I try and let them know that they need to face me and speak clearly but when I start out using my voice they tend to not work with me to help me understand what they’re saying. Now, when I start out with a pen and paper to communicate they usually get the idea pretty quickly that I’m Deaf, then once they understand that I start talking and by that time they already understand they need to face me and speak clearly.
I guess if I were to do this I would start out with just certain public places. Then I’d become voice-off at all public places. [Public places are where I’m most uncomfortable with my speech.] Then eventually I’d start with certain people, in certain situations, or just whenever I’m too tired to concentrate on speaking. People tell me I still have really good speech and that they can’t even tell. The only time I’ve been told I have a slight ‘Deaf Accent’ is in the mornings, I usually have to practice saying a few words until I sound ‘normal’ again, or when I’m just tired or not feeling well. I guess I become lazy sometimes and just don’t concentrate so much on speech. I also tend to get an accent when I’m signing. I think because I’m focusing more on the signs as opposed to the speech.
Anyways, any info or tips ya’ll could give me on going voice-off would be so much appreciated. I’m not sure yet if I’ll go through with it but I do want to finally be comfortable in my own skin.
When becoming voice-off did you tell people that’s what you were doing or did it just sort of happen at some point? I’m not necessarily saying I want to become completely voice-off, I just want to find a place at which I’m comfortable. If that means turning my speech off completely, then so be it. However, I would like to keep my speech as much as possible in case of emergencies or if I decide I want to be able to talk later. I’ve never really been told how fast I’d lose my speech if I stopped using it so that worries me a little bit.
My thought was to just start out slowly and go from there. I’ve noticed one of the hardest places for me is anywhere with cashiers or when I go to the pharmacy. They always like to chit chat or ask questions and then they seem to get upset when I don’t reply even after telling them I’m Deaf. I try and let them know that they need to face me and speak clearly but when I start out using my voice they tend to not work with me to help me understand what they’re saying. Now, when I start out with a pen and paper to communicate they usually get the idea pretty quickly that I’m Deaf, then once they understand that I start talking and by that time they already understand they need to face me and speak clearly.
I guess if I were to do this I would start out with just certain public places. Then I’d become voice-off at all public places. [Public places are where I’m most uncomfortable with my speech.] Then eventually I’d start with certain people, in certain situations, or just whenever I’m too tired to concentrate on speaking. People tell me I still have really good speech and that they can’t even tell. The only time I’ve been told I have a slight ‘Deaf Accent’ is in the mornings, I usually have to practice saying a few words until I sound ‘normal’ again, or when I’m just tired or not feeling well. I guess I become lazy sometimes and just don’t concentrate so much on speech. I also tend to get an accent when I’m signing. I think because I’m focusing more on the signs as opposed to the speech.
Anyways, any info or tips ya’ll could give me on going voice-off would be so much appreciated. I’m not sure yet if I’ll go through with it but I do want to finally be comfortable in my own skin.
(first time I learned about such a thing as signing) and kept using it with my twin sister and other signers at school, but even though I had moderately severe hearing loss at that time, I still benefited from HAs, so I spoke with everyone else. After I graduated in 2005, I moved to Virginia and didn't know anyone to sign with, so my skills deteriorated 
. When my sister moved to Virginia, we signed on and off, but not exclusively, and I still spoke with everyone else.
and because of her I have been meeting more deaf people and picking up/using ASL again) and she introduced me to some of the interpreters my company employs (it was after that meeting that the deaf coworker and interpreters encouraged me to seek interpreters for myself 
I was shocked! I had always thought it was my obligation :roll: to wear HAs since they helped me to communicate (but still required a huge, exhausting, and sometimes failing effort on my part). I had never thought that I had a choice!
. So now with people I don't know, I sign/mime/write that I am deaf (if I put hoh, that has the same effect as speaking :roll
, so they cannot attribute my speech with my hearing.
. I am in the process at work of coming to a solution with communication, since I cannot get a designated 8 hours a day/5 days a week interpreter (only can request one for training classes, meetings, and events due to supply/demand issues that are being looked into) and there is a lot of on-the-job training left (in the form of impromptu spoken instruction versus formal training classes or demonstrations, so cannot get interpreters) and there is a huge portion of the job that requires me to communicate with my management and sometimes with coworkers where it would be too complicated/too long to do so in writing/text/email, otherwise it would detrimentally affect my productivity 
(respectfully for work and lovingly with friends/family) about my decision. If they will learn/use ASL or other methods to relieve my burden with communication, then I will be willing to use some voice for their benefit from time to time during their transition 
).
I understand from Thomas Merton-Trappist monks live this way. Similar motives?