Bossy Co-Worker

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ClearSky

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Okay, I stared a new job a few weeks ago. I work in the back room of the store. We have a diverse workplace. This lady is from somewhere and she speaks broken English and obvious accent. Anyway, well, she's really nice for real and helpful. A few times lately, she's been telling me what to do. Yesterday, I ignored her and just nodded at what she wanted me to do. Today, she told me to do something, and I did what she said. I mean, she calls me and just has this confidence to tell me what to do. She's no boss back there. There's only one boss that I listen to.

Anyway, well, I just have this irritating feeling. I don't want to be mad at her, but I am not going to tolerate her bossing me anymore.

I had someone else boss me to get a broom. I help get that, but I ignored something else she told me. I think they might assume I didn't hear them.

A lot of times when I ignore someone it's because they are bossy.

It could be because I look young and maybe my being deaf, but I am not sure on this one.

What would you do in this situation? Should I just not listen to them and continue to do the opposite of what they say? I mean I just begin to feel really irrate and I really don't want to show it because I don't want to be mean. I just can't help feeling this way. They may have been there longer, but they don't have any rights to boss people if they were never promoted.
 
I assumed that when you started, you needed her to show you ‘the ropes’ and now that you know what your responsibilities are, you don't need her anymore. Don’t let her “walk all over you”.

If you bring this up with her, you'll make it worse because she will try and justify her actions by pointing out things you still aren't doing correctly, ‘her way’. So there are a few choices -

First, you could see her bossy behavior as a quirk in her personality …. just ignore it and live with it.

Secondly, you could try and figure out why she is acting the way she is. Chances are that she craves attention and wants your acknowledgment. She had that when she was training you, but now that you are up to speed, she’s lost that. Find ways to give her that recognition she needs, and she will be much easier to work with …. by saying, “Thanks for taking the time today to tell me the ins and outs of the job. I learned a lot.” Notice something she is doing well, and ask her to give you some pointers or when you have a challenge arise, ask her opinion on how to solve it. Her experience might actually help you find an easier way.

Thirdly, if all of the above fails - ask her if she got a promotion you weren't aware of. You’ll find sarcasm and humor to be the best way to deal with the likes of her. If you can do this either in front of your real boss or lots of other employees, it usually helps. They feel kind of foolish and embarrassed, and you have taken the 'power' back."

Hope that whatever strategy you choose works for you in dealing with this problem. :)
 
Have you tried talking to her about it? If she won't cooperate, then talk to her boss.
 
I would go with vampy cuz it happened to me and other ladies one nite during the banquet. Our boss was there when it was happened and she came to us and yelled at us for not helping her out. Our boss was standing there and stared at her and she realized he was there and she quickly disappeared. Sure enough she knows it was wrong. If she need help and she would have ask nicely and say I need help here and can you help me. Then we would. I didnt move at all. I just stand there and do nothing to help her cuz I saw my boss reaction. So I stayed. I believed that her daughter have explained the situation with her when they went home. :D The next day she was sorry about the situation.
 
ClearSky said:
Okay, I stared a new job a few weeks ago. I work in the back room of the store. We have a diverse workplace. This lady is from somewhere and she speaks broken English and obvious accent. Anyway, well, she's really nice for real and helpful. A few times lately, she's been telling me what to do. Yesterday, I ignored her and just nodded at what she wanted me to do. Today, she told me to do something, and I did what she said. I mean, she calls me and just has this confidence to tell me what to do. She's no boss back there. There's only one boss that I listen to.

Anyway, well, I just have this irritating feeling. I don't want to be mad at her, but I am not going to tolerate her bossing me anymore.

I had someone else boss me to get a broom. I help get that, but I ignored something else she told me. I think they might assume I didn't hear them.

A lot of times when I ignore someone it's because they are bossy.

It could be because I look young and maybe my being deaf, but I am not sure on this one.

What would you do in this situation? Should I just not listen to them and continue to do the opposite of what they say? I mean I just begin to feel really irrate and I really don't want to show it because I don't want to be mean. I just can't help feeling this way. They may have been there longer, but they don't have any rights to boss people if they were never promoted.
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When I get people do that to me.. I don't confront them about their bossiness, due to they will try and justify why they do it. I just tell them. Do it yourself, I'm busy. Or I will say, If you want it get it yourself. I don't get paid to fetch for you.

The staff that has been their for a while feel like they can take advantage of the new employee and that isn't fair. If it continues, do talk to your boss. So he/she is aware of the situation.

just my two cents worth.
 
I had few same situation at my workplace, I just usually ignore them, if not then tell them to leave me alone, if not then report to manager.
 
I have a woman in my church that is alot like that. She's taken it upon herself to treat me as lesser than her. Well Sunday she popped off and said - Oh, you just told a lie' in a matter of factly tone. I retured it with a "oh I wasnt aware that God had given you a promotion.' She just kinda looked at me like she didnt quite get it. But everyone else smirked like ' haha - owned.'
 
All good, supportive advice here for dealing with bossy co-workers.

I don't think it's your age, because I'm the eldest among beekeepers I work with, and most think they can boss me around because I can't hear.

I complained several times to the owner how my work took longer because the bossy people wanted a "gopher." Chase, go for this; Chase, go for that.

But complaints fell on deaf ears (ha ha ha, love to say that) and it was the major reason I retired before the owner was ready.

Now I only work a job or two when needed, and he's careful to let me work alone or be in charge of the job. Also, all communication are now via text phone so that I can provide documentation of who tells whom what to do.
 
Dixie said:
I have a woman in my church that is alot like that. She's taken it upon herself to treat me as lesser than her. Well Sunday she popped off and said - Oh, you just told a lie' in a matter of factly tone. I retured it with a "oh I wasnt aware that God had given you a promotion.' She just kinda looked at me like she didnt quite get it. But everyone else smirked like ' haha - owned.'
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:giggle: good one
 
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