The Deaf Community

[GrendelQ]

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Wirelessly posted

I understand about deaf community being all over the world. What I understand is that d/Deaf Culture is an American thing. Deaf community does not equal d/Deaf culture if I understand correctly.

Its def not an american thing. It has happened 700 years ago in europe and has spread over here. We have that connection and history.

He might be talking about a certain British blogger.

There's no way that British blogger is 700.
jk

 

[BecLak]

hence the better reason to give all deaf/hoh children exposure to both so that can have the opportunity to decide for themselves on which identity they want to associate with instead of people forcing the identity on them by limiting them to one exposure.

In addition to that, the less risks the children are in for language delays or deficits, the better. Why wouldnt you advocate for that?

You seem to have trouble understanding what I am advocating for.

 

[BecLak]

Yeppers..I was forced to adopt a hearing identity so I spent all of my life trying to be as hearing as I could.

Me too.

 

[Hohtopics]

the second paragraph makes it perfectly clear.. why should we allow the hearing people to determine how we are raised and how we do things??

The reason she understands this more than many is because shes in a wheelchair and does not want anyone to tell her what to do. she is who she is. She can relate with the deaf community. The same goes for minorities.

I'd think that a parent of a deaf child should have more to say on how their child should be raised than some stranger who just happens to have few deaf friends and may know a few signs and as one of the culturally deaf even said it herself in the forum, has "no actual investment", do, no?

 

[Beowulf]

I'd think that a parent of a deaf child should have more to say on how their child should be raised than some stranger who just happens to have few deaf friends and may know a few signs and as one of the culturally deaf even said it herself in the forum, has "no actual investment", do, no?

Up to a point, friend. As long as your child is happy we tend to stay out of it.

 

[shel90]

I'd think that a parent of a deaf child should have more to say on how their child should be raised than some stranger who just happens to have few deaf friends and may know a few signs and as one of the culturally deaf even said it herself in the forum, has "no actual investment", do, no?

Even if it means putting the child at risks for language delays and defiicits?

 

[GrendelQ]

Wirelessly posted

I'd think that a parent of a deaf child should have more to say on how their child should be raised than some stranger who just happens to have few deaf friends and may know a few signs and as one of the culturally deaf even said it herself in the forum, has "no actual investment", do, no?

Even if it means putting the child at risks for language delays and defiicits?

That's far less likely the case here, don't you think? Would you rather a stranger who has friends with codas but no experience with children or expertise in education making decisions about your son's education and means of communicating or do you think that you, as a well-educated mother of that child and someone knowledgable of your child's needs, resources, and options are better suited to make those decisions?

 

[shel90]

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That's far less likely the case here, don't you think? Would you rather a stranger who has friends with codas but no experience with children or expertise in education making decisions about your son's education and means of communicating or do you think that you, as a well-educated mother of that child and someone knowledgable of your child's needs, resources, and options are better suited to make those decisions?

If my child was blind,I would turn to blind people for advice and resources because I would have NO idea on what would be the most effective educational approach to teach blind children.

Yes, I would ask CODAs about their experiences with their deaf parents and do's and don'ts so I wont repeat their parents' mistakes with my son.

 

[AlleyCat]

I see both perspectives. I am not a mom, but if I were -- and one of a deaf child at that -- I think I can safely say that I would turn to others for advice and resources. I suspect that's why some parents have come to this forum.

 

[GrendelQ]

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Wirelessly posted



That's far less likely the case here, don't you think? Would you rather a stranger who has friends with codas but no experience with children or expertise in education making decisions about your son's education and means of communicating or do you think that you, as a well-educated mother of that child and someone knowledgable of your child's needs, resources, and options are better suited to make those decisions?

If my child was blind,I would turn to blind people for advice and resources because I would have NO idea on what would be the most effective educational approach to teach blind children.

Yes, I would ask CODAs about their experiences with their deaf parents and do's and don'ts so I wont repeat their parents' mistakes with my son.

Yes, and you'd likely ask other parents of codas who have been there, done that. But wouldn't you put more value on your own judgment having synthesized all that great input, over a statement of what you should do from an individual without professional expertise relevant to your child, without experience raising a coda, without knowledge of ASL? One example might be an anti-ASL oral-only proponent: should we insist that the right thing for you to do us to take this person's advice because he knows what it's like to raise a child with a different state of hearing?

I think that person has every right to be telling you how and why he made decisions, but NOT to tell you what you should do. And I don't think you should have to face pressure from others in this board to take that advice if you don't agree with it.

 

[shel90]

Wirelessly posted



Yes, and you'd likely ask other ***********s of codas who have been there, done that. But wouldn't you put more value on your own judgment having synthesized all that great input, over a statement of what you should do from an individual without professional expertise relevant to your child, without experience raising a coda, without knowledge of ASL? One example might be an anti-ASL oral-only proponent: should we insist that the right thing for you to do us to take this person's advice because he knows what it's like to raise a child with a different state of hearing?

I think that person has every right to be telling you how and why he made decisions, but NOT to tell you what you should do. And I don't think you should have to face pressure from others in this board to take that advice if you don't agree with it.

I have listened and taken several CODAs advices about my 13 year old daughter already. One was to never use her as an interpreter or have her make phone calls for me.

 

[AlleyCat]

So many of us see/know how our upbringing didn't work for us due to the choices our parents made for us, it seems natural that we would love to see other parents not make the same mistakes. Only time will tell, I suppose.

 

[Beowulf]

Each newborn should come with a book of instructions. *grumbling*

 

[BecLak]

As a parent, my belief is that it is the parent's perogative to make decisions for their own child as any good parent knows and wants what is best for their child. No one knows the child like the parents. When I was a child, my parents did the best they could for me from the information given them. I think the issue here is that we are reliant on how much we are informed as to what choices we make. It is a matter of educating the public on the issues pertaining to deaf people. It is the professionals in the medical and education fields that short change us, whether intentionally or not ie: Audiologists will only sell you the best hearing aids, medical professionals will only tell you what they can down for you in their field of work. Educators can only offer remedial classes etc. Very few will go beyond their own field of work to refer you to different aspects. This is where the parent needs to piece together all the pieces of the puzzle, receive advice from those who have experienced the reality, and to draw the best solution for their child only after exhausting all the possible outcomes.

The most important of all, is that their child grows to be emotionally and mentality stable and secure dispite what physical challenges they may have. To many of us who are deaf, growing up without the information we have now, 'deaf identity' which includes sign language was a vital missing piece.

I am thankful for the AD forum as it is a means to inform the public of the realities of being deaf drawn from the varying experiences of those who are deaf and who live it.

 

[GrendelQ]

I have listened and taken several CODAs advices about my 13 year old daughter already. One was to never use her as an interpreter or have her make phone calls for me.

My question isn't whether you would feel obligated to take the advice of someone with direct experience or expertise -- of course you would take that input seriously and consider it -- but from someone without either, with whom you disagreed. And whether you should expect to be pressured by others into taking that advice over your own experienced and well-researched judgment.

I wouldn't feel comfortable seeing someone like I've described telling you that how you are raising your child is wrong and I would never join a chorus of people telling you that you should disregard everything you know about your child and education and CODAs and deafness simply because this person has had a friend who raised a CODA.

 

[KarissaMann05]

I am thankful for the AD forum as it is a means to inform the public of the realities of being deaf drawn from the varying experiences of those who are deaf and who live it.

Me too. I'm thankful for this place.

Without this place, I don't think I would be the same person... But who knows?

 

[wavedancer]

I am so thankful for this place and the people who share their experiances so that others can have a clue what to expect !

And of course the chance to rant is ALWAYS a good thing

One of the things I was taught by my religious leaders was to never believe what I was told, simply because someone told it to me. That included them. LOL I was told to always think things through, and test them out first, then when they worked, THEN I should believe them.

If they didn't work, well, further inquires and investigation were necessary, until I had the thing figured. (This of course, meant a good deal of not believing what they said, which they handled with great amount of amusement )

Aparently, not every thing works for every person.

So while people might give amazingly stupendous and well meant advice, that advice might not work for you, it might still be useful, since you now have more knowledge. But in the end deciding what's best for you, is left to you.

YMMV

 

[jillio]

So how do you simultaneously teach ASL and spoken language? One of them MUST be the primary language. How do you fully immerse a child in voice off ASL, but at the same time immerse them in fluent spoken language? How do you teach them concepts and in which language? How can you possibly learn ASL, teach it to your child, while keeping them developmentally appropriate in all academics areas, AND spend all day giving them a rich spoken language environment? How do you give them the best spoken language professionals and access to sound all the time BUT still surround them with people who can act as ASL mentors and provide them the fluent ASL model that a learning parent can not? How do you provide them sound, music, and fluent, colorful spoken language while actively making sure that everyone in their lives and community use ASL at all times around them?

The child can learn both as the primary. Simply keep the languages separate, and they will both receive the same amount of emphasis in the particular context in which they are being used. Bilingual children experience this all the time. They are pros at code switching, and have equal fluency in both languages.

I think you are confusing the definition of L1 language and primary languages.

 

[jillio]

What's wrong with providing the fluent colorful spoken language you highly speak of in the home?

My hearing son gets spoken language at school and ASL at home. It isnt harming him at all.

Unless you think deaf children cannot pick up spoken language at home. If so, then why should they have it all times in the educational setting and risk falling behind due to not keeping up?

Exactly!! As a consequence he will develop equal fluency in both languages. He will code switch according to the context. That is what bilingualism is all about. The problem is that people appear not to understand the fundamental concept of bilingualism.

 

[jillio]

I thought your son was in speech therapy?

Yes a child can learn two languages at the same time, but it can cause delays in both languages. Also, I don't advocate for mixing modalities because it can cause regression when the child has to switch back and forth. Also, I think it is less than advisable to attempt to help a child in homework in a language that is completely different, with different vocabulary, syntax, etc, than that which the teacher will be using to teach, explain and test the child in.

Actually, learning both at the same time PREVENTS delays.