Not Deaf enough for Deaf people/way too deaf for hearing people

[Hear Again]

I thought there was a stethoscope on the market that provides vibrotactile feedback -- or am I wrong about that? I haven't been able to keep up to date, so I may be wrong.

 

[zzyxer]

Wow, your post struck a nerve with me. I apologize in advance for the hard tone of this post, though just know, ecp, that the tone is not aimed at you in any way.

First of all, WTF is this "X" person to tell you how the Deaf community is going to view you and accept you? Just because she did a little bit of research (what, a year in the field? two at the most?), that does not mean she is an expert at all on Deaf culture or speak for the Deaf community. Is she Deaf herself? Did this person grow up in the Deaf community? Has she spent time in many of the different major Deaf communities in the country? In fact, how many close relationships with Deaf people does she have? I suggest the next time you see her, you should give her some advice and tell her to STFU about something she knows far less of than she thinks she does. The fact is, there are plenty of small-minded people who just happen to be Deaf, and yes, they won't accept you. Just like a white supremacist won't accept a black person into their family. But being Deaf and being part of the Deaf community does not automatically make someone an elitist prick who will not associate with anyone except other Deaf people. That's ridiculous. The times have changed greatly. "X" is a moron. In my experience, almost every "real" Deaf person (so I guess there are "fake" Deaf people now or something?) I've met, and I admit I haven't met a huge amount, but I have met many, has been very welcoming, and I always feel an inherent bond with them based on the fact that we both understand what it's like to live in a world that is not sympathetic to the way we communicate, regardless that we communicate in different ways. That is something a hearing person will NEVER understand.

Sorry, maybe I've got it all wrong about "X." Maybe she's a nice person and all. Hell maybe she's a CODA or something, but it still ticks me off when people without a hearing loss of any type try and speak for the Deaf/HoH, even if their assumptions are correct. It's the same patriarchal and condescending attitude that Deaf/HoH people have been fighting against for years.

I know your plight well; I also feel as if I am caught between two worlds at times, but I don't worry about if I will "make it" in life, I just get out there and face the WHOLE world, Deaf or hearing or hard of hearing. My advice for you is to stay strong. Focus on your educational goals and have faith in yourself and in the goodness of other people who are not as judgmental as "X." Don't let people like her make you feel insecure or detract you from knowing yourself and your abilities. If you're applying to med school, you are obviously a very smart individual and already farther ahead than the vast majority of people in this world. This might sound ironic, but you are very fortunate, so just remember that. And if people don't want to associate with you, that's their problem, not yours.

Yes, get hooked up with Voc. Rehab. I'm a client myself, and they've helped me out a lot. Feel free to message me with questions.


And here's your hug. You deserve it:

seconded on everything.

 

[zzyxer]

I completely understand the feeling of being between two worlds. I use my HAs so that I can keep working. But my signing skills are weak and I do not have many opportunities to improve them. However, I have never encountered any Deaf members who were critical of my trying to sign and talk at the same time.

yea, same here. im pretty fluent in sign language, but when im with oral people, i tend to voice more than sign. ive never met a deaf person who has critised trying to sign. if you can sign, its always viewed as respect.. i gave up on my hearing aids, just had ci surgery. i hope it works well when i turn it on.