Why adults choose CI's for their children

[SarahsDad]

Hi Leibling)),

You are right. CI is not emergency surgery. I compared CI with schooling only because they are both best taken advantage of when a child is young. Once a child has grown I think much opportunity is lost since the brain acquires language at an early age. The best time to learn language is when you are young. More important than what I think is what R2D2 had to say from his personal experience:

Yes I have personal experience of this. I was given a hearing aid for my worst ear only at the age of 3 and was not given a hearing aid for my better ear until the age of 10 (don't ask!). As a consequence I depended much more on my worst ear because it had 7 extra years of auditory imput and my better ear was only good for environmental sounds.

I think that if you wait until the child is old enough to decide on their own (whenever that is - people will disagree) then there is a greater chance that the CI will not work and that it will be switched off or removed in frustration.

I don't think I will ever implant my better ear because I don't feel that it is developed enough to benefit from a CI.

So I feel our family in this HUGE DILEMMA. If we choose CI NOW, then my daughter doesn't get to make her own choice. If we wait till LATER, then my daughter may not have the CI choice if that is what she wants. As yet, we don't know what to do. We find ourselves trying to sort out information from the doctors who support CI and know very much about medical deafness but are clueless about Deaf culture and Deaf issues, and some who think us to be "stoopid" or selfish parents for even considering CI. Sorry, I know most don't agree with the ("stoopid" parents thing), I'm just stating the extremes.

Our daughters well being and happiness is what's most important to us. We're in this forum to learn.
http://www.alldeaf.com/newreply.php#
Cheers
Thanks,
SarahsDad

 

[R2D2]

Ahem! I'm a female :fly:

R2D2 is a female robot too I believe. My husband calls me that because my hearing aids give feedback every time I laugh or smile and he thinks it sounds like R2D2. Sad, I know!

 

[rockdrummer]

And go firgures a hearing parent would patch up with another hearing parent. Nobody cares what we think, more like saying our opinions aren't vaild.

Cheri and others, I am very thankful for your opinions and insight into the deaf world. Without it, we (heries) would not be able to understand and consider the issues being discussed here. Your knowledge and experience are invaluable!! I absolutely care what you think. I may not always agree with every opinion but they are all of value. Including the ones that I would consider extreme. It gives a glimpse into the diversity of the people that make up the deaf community.

The only thing that disappoints me is when folks start to take personal jabs at each other and start bickering . It's counterproductive to the conversation. Please try to stay objective and take the "high road" if you feel offended by another member’s comments instead of responding in kind. That only fuels the fire. And also remember that if another member's comments are that far off base, simply report the post to a moderator and it will be removed.

Thank you!

 

[Cheri]

I'm glad to see rockdrummer here today.

 

[rockdrummer]

I'm glad to see rockdrummer here today.

Aww...thank you sweetheart.... I have been busy lately and each time I come here there are sooooooo many posts to read thru. I only hope that for some like sarah's dad the good information is comming through and that it is helpful. He is a person that can really benefit from a productive conversation on this subject because of his current situation. I wanted to mention there is a yahoo group called CI Circle that may have some very good information on why parents choose CI for their children..

Thank you and all the best!!!

 

[Foxrac]

Aww...thank you sweetheart.... I have been busy lately and each time I come here there are sooooooo many posts to read thru. I only hope that for some like sarah's dad the good information is comming through and that it is helpful. He is a person that can really benefit from a productive conversation on this subject because of his current situation. I wanted to mention there is a yahoo group called CI Circle that may have some very good information on why parents choose CI for their children..

Thank you and all the best!!!

No longer to see, welcome back to alldeaf forum again.

 

[CutePommie]

I do not believe this. I am the parent of a deaf child, just like your parents are.

What you mean you do not believe this ..??? That different my mum now in her 70's and my dad had passed away 14 years ago ... you are not the just like as my parents .. geezh... I just was to telling you that it was long long time ago ... You do not believe any of my stories ... Now I do not know what I am here in this world for? since you do not believe it geez... I do not know who you are I do not like you.... so F*** it ....
Bye....

 

[Cloggy]

Hi Leibling))..........So I feel our family in this HUGE DILEMMA. If we choose CI NOW, then my daughter doesn't get to make her own choice. If we wait till LATER, then my daughter may not have the CI choice if that is what she wants. As yet, we don't know what to do........

I know the feeling.
But we looked at it from this corner:
Best opportunities with CI are when implanted early. Waiting until the child is older will actually removes opportunities. Also, it will reduce communication with family, friends and the rest of the world.
When she decides to be part of the deaf world, she is able to remove the CI, and even remove the processor/electrode. We will support her with this if this is her choice. We will educate her regarding deafness and deaf history. We still teach her signlanguage but even without it, sign language can be learned at a later stage.

So for us, waiting with CI until later was removing opportunities, reducing her future choice.

 

[Cloggy]

What you mean you do not believe this ..??? That different my mum now in her 70's and my dad had passed away 14 years ago ... you are not the just like as my parents .. geezh... I just was to telling you that it was long long time ago ... You do not believe any of my stories ... Now I do not know what I am here in this world for? since you do not believe it geez... I do not know who you are I do not like you.... so F*** it ....
Bye....

There's definitely a communication problem here....

 

[SarahsDad]

Hi R2D2,
So sorry, my mistake. :Oops:. Now I understand the R2D2 handle. We have a terrible time with hearing aid feedback since the gain is cranked way up due to profound loss. By the way, I love the picture with your posts.
Thanks,
SarahsDad

 

[rockdrummer]

No longer to see, welcome back to alldeaf forum again.

Thanks TrippLA... As I have taken the time to catch up on the posts here, I have to make a point. I not singling anyone out here but the argumentative and condescending responses really add no value to the conversation. Sometimes agreeing to disagree and moving on is the best way to keep things on track. Remember that we are ALL entitled to our opinions and we all have our experiences to share. No one is right or wrong or lying about his or her experience. One thing that I would please ask is that the belittling and condescending responses stop. Think before you speak and be respectful of others. Even if you feel that you have not been respected. Stay on the high road. There are not only deaf and hearing on this forum, there are also others that are challenged in other ways and in multiple ways. Everyone is entitled to his or her views and also to be respected. Please be respectful of each other.

Thank you

 

[R2D2]

Hi R2D2,
So sorry, my mistake. :Oops:. Now I understand the R2D2 handle. We have a terrible time with hearing aid feedback since the gain is cranked way up due to profound loss. By the way, I love the picture with your posts.
Thanks,
SarahsDad

Thanks! That's my gorgeous little girl when she was 6 months old

The funny thing was that feedback never bothered me but it used to bother everyone around me. I've heard it's more of a problem with bigger hearing losses.

Anyway better stop before the Off Topic police come by.

 

[rockdrummer]

Thanks! That's my gorgeous little girl when she was 6 months old The funny thing was that feedback never bothered me but it used to bother everyone around me. I've heard it's more of a problem with bigger hearing losses. Anyway better stop before the Off Topic police come by.

:topic: Pull over.... off topic police here. License and registration maam! Hey I am just kidding. Veering off topic a bit does happen. My concern is that from the onset this thread went waaaay off topic and was going down a path that had nothing to do with the subject. Personally, I don't mind if things go a stray a bit (as they have here) as long as the subject gets addressed and the discussion gets back on track. Thank you R2D2 for your constructive comments here..

 

[SarahsDad]

Most of them are newbies of AD, have no clue who's a parent here, because they spend so much amount of their time in CI forum instead of Parent forum. And go firgures a hearing parent would patch up with another hearing parent. Nobody cares what we think, more like saying our opinions aren't vaild.

Sorry Cheri,
I don't mean to offend anyone here. I do appreciate your opinions. They are the only way we can understand both sides of the issue. I do understand that there are many parents here. What I wanted to say was that if one is a parent and has experienced that kind of love, then they're less likely to believe another parent would choose self interest over the welfare of the child. I mean no disrespect to other parents, and certainly value your opinion.

Thanks,
-SarahsDad

 

[Cheri]

:topic: Pull over.... off topic police here. License and registration maam!..

Gotta love Rockdrummer.

 

[rockdrummer]

Gotta love Rockdrummer.

Oh Thank you Cheri. Life is to short to not laugh once and a while. Even when we are faced with ugliness in the world every day and faced with difficult decisions that will affect ours and our childrens lives we have to be able to laugh once and a while. Dont' ever stop laughing. It's good for your soul.

 

[Cheri]

Sorry Cheri,
I don't mean to offend anyone here. I do appreciate your opinions. They are the only way we can understand both sides of the issue. I do understand that there are many parents here. What I wanted to say was that if one is a parent and has experienced that kind of love, then they're less likely to believe another parent would choose self interest over the welfare of the child. I mean no disrespect to other parents, and certainly value your opinion.

Thanks,
-SarahsDad

I accept your apologies. I appreciated what you said too.

 

[SarahsDad]

A big factor affecting the CI decision for our child is what her experience will be like growing up as the only Deaf person in a hearing family. A Deaf friend told me that at times, she felt isolated, frustrated, and left out. Sometimes she would be wondering what the joke was that everyone was laughing about.

Will I be fluent enough to interpret everything for my daughter? Will her uncle interact with her knowing I will have to interpret everything he says, and do it awkward and slowly. Or will he with all his love, pinch her on the cheek and just say "What a beautiful child, run along now."?

Will my daughter out of frustration give up trying to communicate with family members that don't speak her language? I'd like to believe that the whole family will "just" learn ASL, but I think I'd be foolish to believe that. We have to make decisions based on reality.

What has your experience has been like?

Thanks,
-SarahsDad

 

[Liebling:-)))]

SarahsDad, yes I felt being left out because my parents doesn´t bother to learn sign for me... They have no patience with me. They alway get my one year younger sister to interpret for me which not right.

My hubby´s mother interpreted for us what people talk about... but not all the time because my hubby´s family do not sign but oral...


I would advise you to learn sign for your daughter. She will feel good to communciate anything with you when she knows you can sign. I have seen a lot of hearing parents around here sign good than our old time. Some of them become certifed interpreter. They are happy to do for their children.

 

[SarahsDad]

Hi Liebling,
Thanks so much for you reply. I'm sorry that your parents didn't learn sign. It's not that uncommon, . I know that learing another language can be difficult, especially as we get older. I've been trying with slow success to learn Spanish. My fear is that I will be slow learning ASL also. On the other hand with my daughter I have all the motivation.

-SarahsDad