When did you come out?

ehhh i came out around 8th grade, i always was i just didn't ever admit it. ha
 
Deafteen, how old are you? I know society insists that if you're not hot and horny towards everyone 24/7, there's something wrong with you.
Maybe you're just attracted towards certain people, and when you find that person the sexual feelings will come.
I don't have sexual feelings in general......although if I look at people making love, it does turn me on. However, my sexual feelings for my first girlfriend as well as Hannah are a simple manifesation of the deep love I feel for them.

but the deaf community in this state (not only this state, but other states also) are full of drama. They would spread nasty rumors and pick on me. I can tell you for sure I'm surely glad I broke this "deaf curse" in 2003! Ick, I can't imagine myself still acting as if I was under the deaf curse (2003 to now).
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Oh gawd...........the deaf community is not the only uberdramatic community out there. Ugh.......I'm shuddering remebering the drama at my hearing college.
 
I first realized I was not exactly straight back in '95, at summer camp (all girls...how'd you guess?) when I fell in love with my first girlfriend. I still clearly remember going up to her right after she got crowned Indian Princess. I gave her a hug.....and she gave me a wet sloppy kiss on the cheek. I remember right before, I knew I loved her....but I thought I just loved her as a friend. I didn't realize girls could fall in love with girls. I spent years trying to figure out my feelings for her. The love at the camp we attended was just so beyond extraordinary. It was very hard to differenate between just friend love and "OMG I love you" love there. (I know 8 other girls from the camp who ALSO turned out to be gay too. One of them was actually in my cabin the session I realized I loved Maureen) I also wasn't too popular at my public school. Figured it might have been a stage, and that I'd find someone in college Had guy crushes but no "OMG I'm in love" feelings. Then a few years ago I met my best friend Hannah. I love her dearly, and we are very close. Since falling in love with Hannah I've slowly but surely started to come out to more and more people, including family.
I'm still kind of confused. I know I LOVED Maureen, and I love Hannah......but I also feel like if the girls I've loved were boys I'd have the same feelings for them
 
However, my sexual feelings for my first girlfriend as well as Hannah are a simple manifesation of the deep love I feel for them.
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Deafteen, to expand on this....... I see sex as a way to say without words that I really deeply love the person more then just saying " I love you" I can't imagine having sex just for the sake of sex. I mean sex without love feels good......but there's no amazing connection. Then again.....you can have that loving feeling without sex. I remember "getting off" on things like when my first girlfriend told me " I love you" or just cuddling with Hannah last summer. I actually wonder if MANY teens out there have sex before they're ready, b/c they're in a relatively mild "I like them" relationship, and they THINK they have to have sex.
Wait and see.......you might be surprised. Start out as friends, and then let it develop into something deeper. With the deep feelings should come the desire to make love to someone you love more then life itself.
 
I came out to my mom when I was 14 and we were vacationing in Mexico. I came out to my friends before that.

Then I was on the front cover of my city's paper for my high school's Day of Silence. That's how I came out to like half of my extended family. It was neat.
 
I have my update on my coming out.
I just talked to my mom about my life and she said "I love you and I want to be in your life. I dont wanna loose you."

It made me so happy! I have my mother back!
 
blairtheblur said:
I came out to my mom when I was 14 and we were vacationing in Mexico. I came out to my friends before that.

Then I was on the front cover of my city's paper for my high school's Day of Silence. That's how I came out to like half of my extended family. It was neat.
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dude, thats an awesome way to come out. way to come out man.
 
DylanTheDEAFKid said:
I have my update on my coming out.
I just talked to my mom about my life and she said "I love you and I want to be in your life. I dont wanna loose you."

It made me so happy! I have my mother back!
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Wow, that's awesome. Lucky you haha.
If only my mom was like that but then again I don't care
I really don't care about how anyone feels about me being gay or not.
 
I Shed Misery said:
Wow, that's awesome. Lucky you haha.
If only my mom was like that but then again I don't care
I really don't care about how anyone feels about me being gay or not.
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i'm so glad she is more accepting now. I was so scared i'd loose my mom. She met my boyfriend too and she thought he was a good guy and shes happy for me cause we're moving in together.
 
:PI never come out to my family. Never! My family already knows.
Why? It’s because sister knows me excessively well.
 
Hey there Toma, welcome to this section - dogmom from intro :wave:

my parents know - mom doesn't get it but cuz I'm married <am bi> she lets it go. Hubby knows, came out to him during college when he and I met. Mom's sister - my beloved aunt in Ca - knows; she was one of the first I came out to. No sibs and no other family to speak of.

San Fran. ROCKS -
 
dogmom said:
Hey there Toma, welcome to this section - dogmom from intro :wave:

my parents know - mom doesn't get it but cuz I'm married <am bi> she lets it go. Hubby knows, came out to him during college when he and I met. Mom's sister - my beloved aunt in Ca - knows; she was one of the first I came out to. No sibs and no other family to speak of.

San Fran. ROCKS -
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Ah, thanks again! Haha :wave:
 
I came out as bisexual when I was young teenager and won't easy to become straight because mind has twisted up, however I refuse to come out in outside of my families and I live in area that is probably homophobia that many people don't tolerate with gay people.
 
homo - and trans-/biphobia - :thumbd:!!

very hard if u live in a small or intolerant community :(

if bi, some people who are gay or lesbian have a problem with it too, so issues on all sides -
 
true dogmom.......however it amazes me how much things have changed from the time that Ellen came out as gay.
Being gay is now being seen as something that's actually *gasp* OK.
Small towns will change,, and I bet in ten or twenty years homophobia will be seen as archic as anti Semitism or Catholicism vs Protestantism.
 
deafdyke said:
true dogmom.......however it amazes me how much things have changed from the time that Ellen came out as gay.
Being gay is now being seen as something that's actually *gasp* OK.
Small towns will change,, and I bet in ten or twenty years homophobia will be seen as archic as anti Semitism or Catholicism vs Protestantism.
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Any small town or rural area that filled with socially conservative then it wouldn't going happen but increase of tolerate is possible since views of gay marriage isn't and it would going to be very slow.

In bold, remember, no religion discussion allowed in this forum and I don't agree with your comment.
 
I first came out to my mom at 19. I suppose I should have known she would not have a big problem with it because my mom and dad were both professional musicians, but it was still scary as hell. She said "Well, it had crossed my mind." I hadn't dated in high school, this was Iowa in the 1970s, not a time or place for taking another guy to the prom! She said she loved me no matter what, and she asked me how long I'd known. I said "I suppose I was aware of it since I was about 13." Her answer was wonderful: "I'm so sorry you thought you had to hide it for so long." The next thing she said was, "Actually I sometimes wonder about your father." :S I said something like "Um...Mom...can I be out for 10 minutes at least before we start dragging Dad out of the closet too?" ;) I asked her not to tell my Dad and brother because I wanted to get used to her knowing, and she said OK. The next morning at breakfast though, I could tell my dad was looking at me differently. Like he was searching me, trying to see something he'd missed. He went down to warm up the car (I rode into school with him), and I asked mom, "Did you tell dad?" "Well, yes I did say something, I know you didn't want me to but I thought it would be easier," she said. "Oh, and I told your brother too." (Argh!) So it wasn't the most comfortable ride in but he was okay, a bit silent about it really. My brother however, was sort of a shit, and there were a couple of times where he threatened to tell people when it would have caused a problem. Actually we wonder about him...48 and never had a relationship? (Not that we know of.) Hmmm. As for dad, the circumstantial evidence is pretty strong but we'll never really know.

What I find is that coming out isn't something you just do once, it's something you do throughout your life actually. I lived in Seattle for many years and worked at the University of Washington, where there is a non-discrimination policy so it wasn't so much a matter of "coming out" as it was of simply not hiding it and letting people come to their own conclusions. Now I'm in Istanbul, and things aren't nearly so free here. But I think what is important is not so much whether you have the luxury of being able to tell everyone or not, but being confident in yourself and refusing to accept the crap that you hear. In Turkey "ibne" (faggot) is one of the worst insults you can call someone. Yet almost all of my friends here know and I have not been rejected by anyone. Then again, I pick my friends carefully. But people surprise you, sometimes you think someone is going to freak and they don't, other people you think should know better turn out to be homophobic.

It's easy to be frustrated with people like that...but lots of us have internalized homophobia to deal with, and we know we aren't perverts or filthy or evil. (Well, maybe a little perverted...with the right person...) :) :) People are products of their cultures, and we have to be just as patient with them as we are with ourselves. For a while at least! Later though it's like, "Grow the hell up already!"
 
Too many interesting stories to know; Well, my story doesnt have much interesting but simple and sweet, lol.

I came out of the closet when i was 15 years old i believe, however, when it did, nothing really happened to me that bad but of course, i were extremely nervous to see everybody's reaction at first as i thought they gonna hate me and pick on me but no; Fewest of my old best friend suddenly faded away from friendship just cause of that and I knew it gonna happen but thats life so goes on.

I still meeting ton of people that i met through my friends networking and parties, I havent had problem with any of them knowing that i am gay. It is good to stick with who we are, though.
 
I am out to a select few - mostly coworkers. I think a lot of people suspect it at church. A couple of people from my high school probably knows. My parents probably know but are in denial, but I haven't come out to them yet and probably will never come out to my dad. It's just one part of me I'll have to hide from him as he is extremely judgmental. I've been dealt enough of his judgment as it is growing up deaf in his hearing household.

But I can tell you hiding it is very self-destructive, you begin to hate yourself because you feel guilty for living a lie.

I just wish a day would come where I could find a suitable partner that loves me for me and not just as a sex toy and the time comes where I am ready to spread my wings.

But now, there are times I feel extremely unlovable as no one from either sex seems interested in me.
 
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