What is More Important

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LovingLife

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What is more important, what you say or what people say about you?
 
I agree with Jiro. I believe it's important to live by your words, but I will say that what comes out of your mouth is more important than what people have to say about me. But that's because I don't care what people say about me.
 
I can be a sarcastic bitch and make no bones about it so I guess you could say that what I have to say is more important. I think it is because I spent all of my life worrying about what other people think of me so I kept a lot bottled up out of fear. Got fed up with that.
 
Cdodd said:
I agree with Jiro. I believe it's important to live by your words, but I will say that what comes out of your mouth is more important than what people have to say about me. But that's because I don't care what people say about me.
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well - generally... you should care about what people say about you (except whiners and Debbie Downers) because we cannot self-analyze ourselves.

having a strong self-esteem is how you can improve yourself by listening to their constructive criticism and not getting depressed about it. arrogance is when they like to hear themselves talking and ignoring everybody else because their opinions are more important.

so a question for you - a person who you respect and value very much... does this mean you don't care about what he/she says about you?
 
Jiro said:
well - generally... you should care about what people say about you (except whiners and Debbie Downers) because we cannot self-analyze ourselves.

having a strong self-esteem is how you can improve yourself by listening to their constructive criticism and not getting depressed about it. arrogance is when they like to hear themselves talking and ignoring everybody else because their opinions are more important.

so a question for you - a person who you respect and value very much... does this mean you don't care about what he/she says about you?
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All of my life, I did that but I got called names like , "wimp", "weak-minded" and so forth. I care about what the people whom I value think of me. As for those whom I don't value..not anymore.
 
Wirelessly posted

I agree with Shel. I care about what my love ones say about me. Mainly, I care about how I feel, not what I say. I hold myself accountable for my actions and learn to follow through what I say. Because actions speaks louder than words.
 
Jiro said:
both.

if you preach what you say... people will say good thing about you.
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I disagree with this , there will be people that will say things about others no matter how they live their life. Some people only know how to feel big by spreading lies and rumors about other people.
 
LovingLife said:
What is more important, what you say or what people say about you?
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Hmm.... that's a good question.

Generally, I have no concern of what people say about me. I'm not going to stress myself over that.

It isn't important of what I say either but, if I practice what I preach then it is important because it sets an example for others. If I don't practice what I preach, then whatever I say is moot.
 
I feel it’s what you say. The truest measure of someone's character is in his or her actions, and the words that he or she chooses are a part of those actions. There will always be jerks out there that just like talking bs. I do care what love ones say and think about me and want to hear their constructive criticism.
 
I rather wish I could say I don't give a crap about what anyone says about me but that would be a lie. I do care what I say and how it comes across. I am a very open person and sometimes I have said things when I probably should not have or say things in a way that comes across differently than I intended them too - I will forever be a work in progress. My thoughts are my words and my words lead to my actions so what I say is important. However, what others say about me (either good or bad) must have some thread of truth in it and, therefore, it is also important to me, especially if they are close friends or family. If the 'others' do not know me well, I would take what they say with a grain of salt understanding that their opinions may come from assumption rather than knowledge.
 
whatdidyousay! said:
I disagree with this , there will be people that will say things about others no matter how they live their life. Some people only know how to feel big by spreading lies and rumors about other people.
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not a problem for me.

lot of people who know me know enough to know the truth (whoa ever seen lot of "know" in one sentence? :lol: ). if they want to believe the lie, then I guess it's pretty obvious that they're no longer my friends. very simple. my life is basically drama-free and I don't spend my time and grief trying to prove them wrong.

like I said before - you just gotta have a strong self-esteem. if they want to feel big by spreading lies and rumors - go ahead.... be my guest. it's very easy for me to make these drama queens feel very small without even raising my blood pressure :lol:
 
Jiro said:
not a problem for me.

lot of people who know me know enough to know the truth (whoa ever seen lot of "know" in one sentence? :lol: ). if they want to believe the lie, then I guess it's pretty obvious that they're no longer my friends. very simple. my life is basically drama-free and I don't spend my time and grief trying to prove them wrong.

like I said before - you just gotta have a strong self-esteem. if they want to feel big by spreading lies and rumors - go ahead.... be my guest. it's very easy for me to make these drama queens feel very small without even raising my blood pressure :lol:
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This has nothing to with having a strong self-esteem , the person that was spreading the lies about my hearing dog and me was a trustee and he told the lies to the manger who believed the lies about Finlay shitting in the hallway and trying to made pay a fine . I could care less what people say about me. But they better not tell lies about my dogs.
 
Good question.

There are stupid moron pple who no matter how much and how long you explain things to, they'll never get it.
so, is it even worth your time and breath be wasting on them?

Then there are pple whose opinion really matter, so you better be careful they do not get wrong one about you, for example, your employer
or, worse, your future employer, future MiL, FiL etc.

Then there is the matter why shouldn't you always "be yourself" :giggle:

Fuzzy
 
What is true is what matters. If people are saying the truth then that matters more than what you may be saying which is false, on the other hand, what you may be saying is more true than what others are saying. Could they be wrong or lying?

The issue becomes very serious when you are being lied about purposefully. I found a document written about me once called, "constructing a persona," and it described all sorts of ways to induce obedience and terror. This I found from malfactors at a time when there was an incident of reckless driving in which I was accused wrongly.

I had been the passenger and quit the job. The incident did have a life-destroying consequence, but over time witnesses were found who agreed that I had been the passenger.

So different people were saying different things about me, but for a while I was very alone.
 
Jiro said:
well - generally... you should care about what people say about you (except whiners and Debbie Downers) because we cannot self-analyze ourselves.

having a strong self-esteem is how you can improve yourself by listening to their constructive criticism and not getting depressed about it. arrogance is when they like to hear themselves talking and ignoring everybody else because their opinions are more important.

so a question for you - a person who you respect and value very much... does this mean you don't care about what he/she says about you?
Click to expand...

Well sure, there are people in my life whose opinions I value, but that's a pretty small handful of people.
 
Jiro said:
:thumb:

that's more than enough!
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You're probably right. However, you have to agree that at the end of the night, your actions, words and thoughts are all you really have that make you who you are; nobody has to live with that but you. So I do believe that the emphasis should be more about focusing on who you are as an individual, and less about caring what others have to say.
 
It's clear that you can have to police what destructive people are saying. I was made into a hate object by persona and it has consumed my life. Someone once said to me, "You're a tragedy," and that is true. What people said about me is what made me one.

I can live with myself because I know what really happened, but it is hard. People make it very hard.
 
Cdodd said:
You're probably right. However, you have to agree that at the end of the night, your actions, words and thoughts are all you really have that make you who you are; nobody has to live with that but you. So I do believe that the emphasis should be more about focusing on who you are as an individual, and less about caring what others have to say.
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yes you can do that but to me - that is rather bit too lonely.

if you want to inspire others and be involved in a community, then it does matter that you preach what you say and in return - people will say good thing about you... and there will be other people who will speak badly of you. it's like a weight scale... if the good side outweighs other side... then you've lived a pretty good life :)

but if it seems like everybody's gossipping around and spreading rumors about you and you had to defend yourself everyday.... then all I can say is to take a look at yourself and be honest because there's gotta be a reason for something terrible like this happening to you. thing does not just happen for no reason especially like this.
 
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