Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction

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defgrl

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Recently, I was eating lunch at a "fast food" restaurant near the Deaf Church I have been attending. Another Deaf lady and I were having a conversation in Sign and I was paying attention to that and not the "murmurings" of the Hearing people around us talking. (Kind of just sounds like a bunch of people mumbling at once.) Anyway, all of a sudden, I clearly heard someone sitting somewhere behind me say, "If I went deaf right now, I think I would cry."

I did nothing to acknowledge that I had any awareness of what was said, but I heard snatches of a few other comments. Apparently we, as well as two other Deaf ladies from the church, were an ongoing topic of discussion. Surprisingly, it did not hurt my feelings. I told the lady I was eating lunch with what had been said, but that was about it. All I could think was how glad I am to be Deaf. What gets me are some of the odd assumptions that people make about us: 1) All Deaf people are "profoundly deaf." /"Deaf people can't hear anything." 2) Deaf people can't talk (use their voices). 3) People who "speak well" can't be Deaf. 4) All Deaf people are great lipreaders. Some of this stuff is just so ridiculous as to be hysterically funny, except that such STEREOTYPING has resulted in everything from "minor" misunderstandings to cases of outright, blatant discrimination.

My pastor is Deaf, has been so since birth, and yet his speech is "clear enough" that some people insist that he must be HOH, and some think he is Hearing! What REALLY cracks me up is that he has had a CI for about a year now; yet there are still going to be people that INSIST that he is "Hearing." :laugh2::laugh2::laugh2:

Anybody ever run into anything as nutty as that?
 
I think it's hard for people in general to understand stuff they aren't familiar with. The only basis of knowledge, other than asking or research (which is hard to do in some situations), about differences they are confronted with is going to be either a) past experience or b) media portrayal. Think about it -- if you'd never known anyone with Cerebral Palsy and you'd only ever seen Cerebral Palsy patients on television, who had very serious forms of CP, you might not understand how a person with only a small limp had the same disease as the person in a near vegetative state.
I'm not saying that ignorance is excusable, but I do think it's understandable to some extent.

But what I do find ridiculous is people who still assume they know better than you after something has been explained to them. Honestly, what's wrong with people? Why is it so hard for people to understand that something might be different from how they perceived it?
 
I'm clearly having technical difficulties :) The other half of my message has wandered off...
 
Oh yea, I have ran into many many nutty and idiotic assumptions made about deaf people.
 
nope said:
I think it's hard for people in general to understand stuff they aren't familiar with. The only basis of knowledge, other than asking or research (which is hard to do in some situations), about differences they are confronted with is going to be either a) past experience or b) media portrayal. Think about it -- if you'd never known anyone with Cerebral Palsy and you'd only ever seen Cerebral Palsy patients on television, who had very serious forms of CP, you might not understand how a person with only a small limp had the same disease as the person in a near vegetative state.
I'm not saying that ignorance is excusable, but I do think it's understandable to some extent.

But what I do find ridiculous is people who still assume they know better than you after something has been explained to them. Honestly, what's wrong with people? Why is it so hard for people to understand that something might be different from how they perceived it?
Click to expand...

Especially when these hearing people who think they know better than deaf people. I call that "audism" and disrespect.
 
Yeah, a lot of hearies think that since ur deaf, ur dumb as well....it's not gonna change in my lifetime, I'm sure.....and even kids think that way.

God forbid you being able to do something better than they can!...so many people have said..."I don't know how she does it! She can't hear"....(and them not being able to do something, even tho' they CAN hear).

sigh! and a big shrug!....We've got a really long road ahead of us, deafies! We've come a long way, I admit...but the true and 100% acceptance is still missing, along with the respect.

Maybe if we started turning cart wheels in the middle of the road, some hearies would exclaim "wow"....that's amazing!
 
defgrl said:
Recently, I was eating lunch at a "fast food" restaurant near the Deaf Church I have been attending. Another Deaf lady and I were having a conversation in Sign and I was paying attention to that and not the "murmurings" of the Hearing people around us talking. (Kind of just sounds like a bunch of people mumbling at once.) Anyway, all of a sudden, I clearly heard someone sitting somewhere behind me say, "If I went deaf right now, I think I would cry."

I did nothing to acknowledge that I had any awareness of what was said, but I heard snatches of a few other comments. Apparently we, as well as two other Deaf ladies from the church, were an ongoing topic of discussion. Surprisingly, it did not hurt my feelings. I told the lady I was eating lunch with what had been said, but that was about it. All I could think was how glad I am to be Deaf. What gets me are some of the odd assumptions that people make about us: 1) All Deaf people are "profoundly deaf." /"Deaf people can't hear anything." 2) Deaf people can't talk (use their voices). 3) People who "speak well" can't be Deaf. 4) All Deaf people are great lipreaders. Some of this stuff is just so ridiculous as to be hysterically funny, except that such STEREOTYPING has resulted in everything from "minor" misunderstandings to cases of outright, blatant discrimination.

My pastor is Deaf, has been so since birth, and yet his speech is "clear enough" that some people insist that he must be HOH, and some think he is Hearing! What REALLY cracks me up is that he has had a CI for about a year now; yet there are still going to be people that INSIST that he is "Hearing." :laugh2::laugh2::laugh2:

Anybody ever run into anything as nutty as that?
Click to expand...

Yep.. I can relate to your pastor... I've had hearing say the same thing about me. One guy kept saying I'm partially deaf. not really. My loss is in the profound range and my CI doesn't mean I'm hearing now. I had trouble getting thru to my doctor's office thru relay today. Sec kept saying she didn't have time for relay as she was on switchboard. She has heard my speech so she had a hard time believing i can't hear well enough "can't you talk to me directly?" :roll:
 
deafskeptic said:
Yep.. I can relate to your pastor... I've had hearing say the same thing about me. One guy kept saying I'm partially deaf. not really. My loss is in the profound range and my CI doesn't mean I'm hearing now. I had trouble getting thru to my doctor's office thru relay today. Sec kept saying she didn't have time for relay as she was on switchboard. She has heard my speech so she had a hard time believing i can't hear well enough "can't you talk to me directly?" :roll:
Click to expand...

Oh I really, really, really hate that!

The assumption that since we speak so well, we must obviously be hearing, and should do it the way everyone else does it.
 
DGirl101 said:
The assumption that since we speak so well, we must obviously be hearing, and should do it the way everyone else does it.
Click to expand...

Apparently, that's what Medicaid must think about me... since they denied covering my cochlear implant due to the fact I can still communicate via speech, they don't give a rat's ass how bad my hearing really is. Well excuse me for having good speech, the deaf school and the speech therapist worked HARD to help me improve my speech when I was in school. Medicaid's reasoning is just outrageous and you can bet I'm going to appeal the denial. idiots...

And I've run into people who can't believe I'm deaf because of how well I speak. But if only they knew just how badly I hear with just a hearing aid in right ear (left ear is dead ear).
 
cdmeggers said:
Apparently, that's what Medicaid must think about me... since they denied covering my cochlear implant due to the fact I can still communicate via speech, they don't give a rat's ass how bad my hearing really is. Well excuse me for having good speech, the deaf school and the speech therapist worked HARD to help me improve my speech when I was in school. Medicaid's reasoning is just outrageous and you can bet I'm going to appeal the denial. idiots...

And I've run into people who can't believe I'm deaf because of how well I speak. But if only they knew just how badly I hear with just a hearing aid in right ear (left ear is dead ear).
Click to expand...

I run into that very often and for that reason alone I think I may turn to not speaking outside of the house and maybe church. I am late-deafened so my speech is very good. My mother had diction lessons while growing up and worked with me while growing up, therefore, my speech is excellent but getting sloppier as time with no hearing goes on. Mom says I am dropping most sounds now.

I keep paper and pencil and pen available at all times.
 
the tables can be turned too - most deaf people i've met don't believe that i'm deaf at first. it's weird.. do i act/look like i'm hearing or something? :\
 
A few years ago when I was about 14/15, me and my girl friend went to the swimming baths together. We can't obviously hear as we had to remove our implants before entering the water. This group of teenage boys came over to us as we were signing. One of them asked me about my friend "Is she deaf?" I replied " we both are" He was like no you're not deaf because you can speak. I went no I am deaf. I cannot hear you at all.

He didn't believe me so I told him to shout something and I turned round, the look on his face when I turned back round :rofl:

I don't know HOW people think deaf people cannot speak!!!

They later started talking to us. :)
 
I have a fun one to put here. I went to a local restaurant with my daughter recently.

Apparently unknown to us the local hockey team was doing some of the serving and were going to put their tips together to make a scholarship for one lucky guy on their team, and also buy a TOy for Tots.

Very loud environment, so our whole meal was conducted in sign. When the hockey player who was in our area saw us, his eyes kind of rolled back in his head like he might faint and he just bypassed us for the next group.

On the bright side, the lady in the family sitting next to us gave my daughter a $5 off coupon.

I didn't want to give a hockey player money to benefit himself anyway. :shrug:
 
I know just what you mean by this! "(Kind of just sounds like a bunch of people mumbling at once" When I around a lot of people talking at once it sound like bunch of bees buzzing! I was talking to a friend about going to the movie and I told her I do not go any more as it cost too much and I can't understand what being said. My friend said but the sound is loud! I told her it does not matter how loud the sound is if I can't understand what being said!!
Hearing people will never get it!
 
I encounter those assumptions all the time. All... the... time... They think since I can read, write and speak so well that I'm not deaf, but when I take my hearing aid out, they shut up at least.
 
Today a guy in my class asked me why I had transcribers.
I told him, plain and simple "because I'm hard of hearing."
He told me I wasn't hard of hearing.
Chee, thanks for the validation...
:roll:
Then he decided to try make it difficult for my transcribers by being annoying and saying things really really fast.
They wrote {male student being a jackass}, which made my afternoon.
 
badwolf said:
Today a guy in my class asked me why I had transcribers.
I told him, plain and simple "because I'm hard of hearing."
He told me I wasn't hard of hearing.
Chee, thanks for the validation...
:roll:
Then he decided to try make it difficult for my transcribers by being annoying and saying things really really fast.
They wrote {male student being a jackass}, which made my afternoon.
Click to expand...

Just ask him point blank. Are you an Audiologist?


By the by: I have now just started carrying around a little piece of paper from my audiologist that states that I AM DEAF.

Actually had to use it over the holiday weekend. Shut the skeptic right up after just about yelling that I am not Deaf as if she had the knowledge and the smarts to come to that answer. :roll:
 
I have a disabled bus pass because of my deafness. The other day a bus driver seemed to doubt that I should have it, he examined it twice before letting me on the bus. My hair is quite long at the moment and covers my HAs, and this driver was looking at me like 'there's nothing wrong with you!' Maybe I should carry a copy of my audiogram to show to such people, but I doubt if he would understand if anyway. I felt like saying to him 'You're a bus driver, not an audiologist or a doctor!'
 
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