Do people who are deaf travel much by themselves or go backpacking? What was your experience like?
I'm 23, born profoundly HoH/deaf and currently i'm in New Zealand and have been for the past month and a half travelling. This is the first time I've travelled this far by myself though I've learnt so much in the past month travelling here.
Before I left I used to rely a lot on other people to catch what people had said and used to be easily persuaded by others - I found it difficult to stand up for myself or say no too.
Though since travelling it's forced me to talk to a lot more people than what I normally would've done back home. I've had to toughen up too in the sense of having to trust and rely on myself, not to be easily persuaded if someone ask for change for example or be ripped off. I have to grow a thick skin to keep myself safe is what I've learnt. People seem to take advantage of you if you're not careful.
Though it's also been hard, when I was travelling on the Airplane i could hear what the staff was saying to me (he was asking if this food which was labelled vegan was for the right person). Though I couldn't grasp what he said and had to look at the other person, after 3/4 times asking to repeat the question I could see an awkward look in their faces. Eventually I could make out what he was saying and I got my food. I felt like an idiot afterwards , I know I can't change my hearing though the looks they gave even if they weren't intentional and having to repeat myself made me feel like a moron.
Other instances occurred similar to this since I got off the airplane. I've noticed a lot of people are really fast to judge you or don't want anything to do with you. I've had to learn to grow a thick skin about this too. I use to take it very personally I feel upset, frustrated and isolated that I couldn't communicate or relate with people compared to how other people who can hear do. It takes me more time to grasp what's being said depending on how noisy it is. I wish people could take that bit more time to include or not judge a deaf person. Nether-less that said, those who are fast to judge or not find time for you aren't really much worth of your time bothering for too either. Though I used to run after these people wanting to feel accepted and have some friends. This doesn't really help and can make you feel really torn up inside. I've learnt to let things drop now if someone isn't treating you right - you can know that impression really straight away with how they look at you or speak to you almost in a reserved or short way. It really doesn't take that much more effort to include a deaf person into a conversation - just a bit more attention and pacing to make it easier for a deaf person.
I keep moving on when these incidents occur and think positively. Though these isolated incidents happened nearly almost daily before I left for years, though each time this happens they accumulate a bigger picture of flashbacks running back to when I was at primary school with the same feeling of feeling alone, empty and unsatisfied inside of not being able to relate, connect or engage with people like how other people do. I wish hearing people could see this and what's like for a deaf person, then again perhaps realistically they won't be able to relate to this.
I've found some great strategies though to start conversation with people though! If you can play a musical instrument it can be a great way of starting a conversation. While i was travelling I played the piano each time I came across one - after each time I played it nearly someone was around to say 'hey, nice playing' and it began a conversation with new people!
Also if things go wrong, you really have to sort and deal problems out all by yourself. I can't rely on others to help me out I've never had this responsibility till now. It was scary at first though its a great and rewarding feeling to be able to fully look after your self.
Right now I'm trying to keep positive and give myself space to reflect on these points above. I often feel like something missing in me, a lack of identity to relate with other with, under confident and a lack of self-esteem with myself with having to go through this) or maybe a lack of connection and love with myself. I came to conclude that it doesn't matter if other people don't appreciate your time effort or skills. You as a person yourself have to really appreciate yourself and come to terms with it as well even if it can be at the moment a consistent battle to deal with. It shouldn't stop you from doing anything.
I think being deaf and travelling alone makes your more vulnerable to a hearing person in ways though I've learnt travelling alone isn't bad, you meet people all the time constantly along the way. Even if it's only for a brief moment in time you see that not all people are so bad after all and that you're never completely always alone. I used to think I was alone before I left though until now I've never really known what it's like to be completely alone on a completely different part of the world. It's different from feeling alone or socially excluded (intentionally or unintentionally) in conversations. I feel so insignificant in the world now coming this far before I left. It's been a really big eye opener.
Before I left I never really appreciated myself for who I am, I felt rejected, isolated and angry inside a lot of the time having to deal with all of this. To the point of which i'd say I hated myself, my voice, that I couldn't be like other hearing people - I thought i was the problem that no-one could like me. I didn't see any way of this with dealing with all of this and thought about suicide. Not that I really want to end my life though that everyday could feel really stressful and as I grew older I could only then see the true extent of how my hearing loss made me feel limited and cut off from a lot of situation communicating with others. Music is a great help for this to channel across all the kinds of feelings that may be going around your mind. Whenever you've had a great day or perhaps a really miserable day - to spend 30 minutes to an hour getting lost playing a musical instrument was a great way to for a moment forget about everything and reflect differently about the situation than from before when all these feelings were being build up bottled inside.
It's not until I wen't travelling that I started to really appreciate myself for what I can do. Who cares what other people think of you and if other people might not show you the appreciate you want. If you yourself don't appreciate yourself, no one else will for you. I like it that I'm different, that I might not be able to hear every conversation though I can still enjoy my own company just observing how other people interact with each other. I'm happy to be myself, rather than thinking I have to fit in or be like everybody else. While travelling I was talking to a woman who was saying she was trying to stop smoking - and here it was I thought I had issues to deal with! We all have our own issues to deal with even if that may mean theres more obstacles to overcome as a deaf person. Be happy for who you are and try not to put your self down so much. I used to be really hard myself in situations which I probably didn't need to be.
Hopefully hearing people one day will understand what it's like for deaf people and won't generalise or stereotype how a deaf person is in future. It's more than just about not hearing as well as others.
Thoughts?
I'm 23, born profoundly HoH/deaf and currently i'm in New Zealand and have been for the past month and a half travelling. This is the first time I've travelled this far by myself though I've learnt so much in the past month travelling here.
Before I left I used to rely a lot on other people to catch what people had said and used to be easily persuaded by others - I found it difficult to stand up for myself or say no too.
Though since travelling it's forced me to talk to a lot more people than what I normally would've done back home. I've had to toughen up too in the sense of having to trust and rely on myself, not to be easily persuaded if someone ask for change for example or be ripped off. I have to grow a thick skin to keep myself safe is what I've learnt. People seem to take advantage of you if you're not careful.
Though it's also been hard, when I was travelling on the Airplane i could hear what the staff was saying to me (he was asking if this food which was labelled vegan was for the right person). Though I couldn't grasp what he said and had to look at the other person, after 3/4 times asking to repeat the question I could see an awkward look in their faces. Eventually I could make out what he was saying and I got my food. I felt like an idiot afterwards , I know I can't change my hearing though the looks they gave even if they weren't intentional and having to repeat myself made me feel like a moron.
Other instances occurred similar to this since I got off the airplane. I've noticed a lot of people are really fast to judge you or don't want anything to do with you. I've had to learn to grow a thick skin about this too. I use to take it very personally I feel upset, frustrated and isolated that I couldn't communicate or relate with people compared to how other people who can hear do. It takes me more time to grasp what's being said depending on how noisy it is. I wish people could take that bit more time to include or not judge a deaf person. Nether-less that said, those who are fast to judge or not find time for you aren't really much worth of your time bothering for too either. Though I used to run after these people wanting to feel accepted and have some friends. This doesn't really help and can make you feel really torn up inside. I've learnt to let things drop now if someone isn't treating you right - you can know that impression really straight away with how they look at you or speak to you almost in a reserved or short way. It really doesn't take that much more effort to include a deaf person into a conversation - just a bit more attention and pacing to make it easier for a deaf person.
I keep moving on when these incidents occur and think positively. Though these isolated incidents happened nearly almost daily before I left for years, though each time this happens they accumulate a bigger picture of flashbacks running back to when I was at primary school with the same feeling of feeling alone, empty and unsatisfied inside of not being able to relate, connect or engage with people like how other people do. I wish hearing people could see this and what's like for a deaf person, then again perhaps realistically they won't be able to relate to this.
I've found some great strategies though to start conversation with people though! If you can play a musical instrument it can be a great way of starting a conversation. While i was travelling I played the piano each time I came across one - after each time I played it nearly someone was around to say 'hey, nice playing' and it began a conversation with new people!
Also if things go wrong, you really have to sort and deal problems out all by yourself. I can't rely on others to help me out I've never had this responsibility till now. It was scary at first though its a great and rewarding feeling to be able to fully look after your self.
Right now I'm trying to keep positive and give myself space to reflect on these points above. I often feel like something missing in me, a lack of identity to relate with other with, under confident and a lack of self-esteem with myself with having to go through this) or maybe a lack of connection and love with myself. I came to conclude that it doesn't matter if other people don't appreciate your time effort or skills. You as a person yourself have to really appreciate yourself and come to terms with it as well even if it can be at the moment a consistent battle to deal with. It shouldn't stop you from doing anything.
I think being deaf and travelling alone makes your more vulnerable to a hearing person in ways though I've learnt travelling alone isn't bad, you meet people all the time constantly along the way. Even if it's only for a brief moment in time you see that not all people are so bad after all and that you're never completely always alone. I used to think I was alone before I left though until now I've never really known what it's like to be completely alone on a completely different part of the world. It's different from feeling alone or socially excluded (intentionally or unintentionally) in conversations. I feel so insignificant in the world now coming this far before I left. It's been a really big eye opener.
Before I left I never really appreciated myself for who I am, I felt rejected, isolated and angry inside a lot of the time having to deal with all of this. To the point of which i'd say I hated myself, my voice, that I couldn't be like other hearing people - I thought i was the problem that no-one could like me. I didn't see any way of this with dealing with all of this and thought about suicide. Not that I really want to end my life though that everyday could feel really stressful and as I grew older I could only then see the true extent of how my hearing loss made me feel limited and cut off from a lot of situation communicating with others. Music is a great help for this to channel across all the kinds of feelings that may be going around your mind. Whenever you've had a great day or perhaps a really miserable day - to spend 30 minutes to an hour getting lost playing a musical instrument was a great way to for a moment forget about everything and reflect differently about the situation than from before when all these feelings were being build up bottled inside.
It's not until I wen't travelling that I started to really appreciate myself for what I can do. Who cares what other people think of you and if other people might not show you the appreciate you want. If you yourself don't appreciate yourself, no one else will for you. I like it that I'm different, that I might not be able to hear every conversation though I can still enjoy my own company just observing how other people interact with each other. I'm happy to be myself, rather than thinking I have to fit in or be like everybody else. While travelling I was talking to a woman who was saying she was trying to stop smoking - and here it was I thought I had issues to deal with! We all have our own issues to deal with even if that may mean theres more obstacles to overcome as a deaf person. Be happy for who you are and try not to put your self down so much. I used to be really hard myself in situations which I probably didn't need to be.
Hopefully hearing people one day will understand what it's like for deaf people and won't generalise or stereotype how a deaf person is in future. It's more than just about not hearing as well as others.
Thoughts?
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