Speaking and signing called key to richer life

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faire_jour said:
Do you understand that there are plenty of oral deaf people who hear and understand spoken language? That do not struggle and some who don't even lipread?

And it is not ok with me for a child to miss out.
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In a group setting? Nonsense. They are extremely rare.
 
Beowulf said:
In a group setting? Nonsense. They are extremely rare.
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Exactly, this is why so many of us who have grown up HoH or oral deaf end up learning sign language and seeking out the Deaf community later in life. We become sick and tired of sitting around a table, jerking our heads rapidly from face to face trying to follow the conversation and missing most of it anyway.

Sure, I can have 1 on 1 conversations without problem when there is no background noise, but I can't conduct my entire social life in that manner, and social interaction is just as important as 1 on 1.

I wish I had learned ASL when I was younger, but nobody figured it was important for me because I was "doing fine" without it.
 
TheWriteAlex said:
Exactly, this is why so many of us who have grown up HoH or oral deaf end up learning sign language and seeking out the Deaf community later in life. We become sick and tired of sitting around a table, jerking our heads rapidly from face to face trying to follow the conversation and missing most of it anyway.

Sure, I can have 1 on 1 conversations without problem when there is no background noise, but I can't conduct my entire social life in that manner, and social interaction is just as important as 1 on 1.

I wish I had learned ASL when I was younger, but nobody figured it was important for me because I was "doing fine" without it.
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That's exactly what my ex-husband used to say when I was married to him.

I am like you -- I can do one-on-one conversations without a problem. Group settings? Forget it.
 
The irony if there's a group conversation in ASL, we'd understand it. However, FJ or other hearies would miss out.
 
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Imagine without banned sign languages in 1880's, it would be much better than today... but who knows.
 
TheWriteAlex said:
Exactly, this is why so many of us who have grown up HoH or oral deaf end up learning sign language and seeking out the Deaf community later in life. We become sick and tired of sitting around a table, jerking our heads rapidly from face to face trying to follow the conversation and missing most of it anyway.

Sure, I can have 1 on 1 conversations without problem when there is no background noise, but I can't conduct my entire social life in that manner, and social interaction is just as important as 1 on 1.

I wish I had learned ASL when I was younger, but nobody figured it was important for me because I was "doing fine" without it.
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I know. That's why I wish people would stop pushing oral-only on many of us because it is US that we have to deal with the negative consequences of it not them.
 
Honestly, I don't think FJ's child is missing out anything RIGHT NOW. Everyone is thinking about group settings, chit chat in noisy environments, etc. But doesn't that start to happen when you are teenagers? 11-13 years old? Do you honestly think FJ's child is missing things out at this age? When you are 4-6 years old, parents speak slowly towards you, and your friends say simple sentences. I am pretty sure she is understanding everything or almost everything. When she gets older, the conversations will become more advanced and most likely in noisy environments due to school/recess, then.. well.. that's a obstacle, isn't it? Hopefully, FJ will have weighed out her options again at that point in time.

My mom weighed out her options and decided to send me to a small private hearing school. She sent my speech therapist to class a few times throughout elementary school to "observe me" to make sure I understood everything my teacher and friends said. How embarrassing but at least none of the classmates knew that she had anything to do with me. :) Anyway, my point is my mom did not assume that once I did fine in the first grade, I should be okay for the rest of my school career.

I asked my mom what if I wasn't doing fine or unhappy with school. She said that she would have done the Sign Language-English program that she looked into back then. She couldn't remember if it was Total Communication or Bi-Bi. But considering that it was over 20 years ago and in Miami, I would guess it is TC.
 
Miss-Delectable said:
The irony if there's a group conversation in ASL, we'd understand it. However, FJ or other hearies would miss out.
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FJ is fluent in ASL. She (and her child) would probably understand more than you might think. I'm still learning, so I'd probably miss most of it.

I haven't seen many pushing oral-only on this board. Seems to me that all the hearing parents here are supporters of ASL and either have or still do use ASL with their children -- their primary concern is that a child have access to full and fluent language, and fast. Have you seen exceptions to this?
 
GrendelQ said:
FJ is fluent in ASL. She (and her child) would probably understand more than you might think. I'm still learning, so I'd probably miss most of it.

I haven't seen many pushing oral-only on this board. Seems to me that all the hearing parents here are supporters of ASL and either have or still do use ASL with their children -- their primary concern is that a child have access to full and fluent language, and fast. Have you seen exceptions to this?
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Yes, I don't see any oral only parents here, actually. Yes, there are parents who have ALREADY done oral only but their child is already fully grown. But the ones who have a young and still developing child seem to employ the full toolbox method.

I wonder if some deaf people are so upset about how they were raised that they push their anger towards these parents here on AD, when they really should do that to their own parents instead?

Although some parents obviously should be blamed for starting attacks. But everyone knows why they do..... their hot button is obviously their child or methods they are using for their child. Ah..... parents. :)
 
Daredevel7 said:
Yes, I don't see any oral only parents here, actually. Yes, there are parents who have ALREADY done oral only but their child is already fully grown. But the ones who have a young and still developing child seem to employ the full toolbox method.

I wonder if some deaf people are so upset about how they were raised that they push their anger towards these parents here on AD, when they really should do that to their own parents instead?

Although some parents obviously should be blamed for starting attacks. But everyone knows why they do..... their hot button is obviously their child or methods they are using for their child. Ah..... parents. :)
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faire_jour said:
Because you are missing out on all the language around you....

I don't understand what is going on....it's like the Twilight Zone....

The whole point of providing ASL is to make sure the child doesn't go years without language, and here everyone is saying that it isn't a big deal.....

So, if it isn't a bad thing to be years behind in language, and oral kids catch up just fine, why are you fighting against oral only????
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.
 
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faire_jour said:
Miss-Delectable said:
The irony if there's a group conversation in ASL, we'd understand it. However, FJ or other hearies would miss out.
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Nope, I do just fine, thanks.
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Yes, I do just fine when hearing people get in a little group too(which is alot, it's rare to speak to them alone). Yep, what they have to say is NOT important. I'm wasting my time hanging out with them.
 
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Daredevel7 said:
GrendelQ said:
FJ is fluent in ASL. She (and her child) would probably understand more than you might think. I'm still learning, so I'd probably miss most of it.

I haven't seen many pushing oral-only on this board. Seems to me that all the hearing parents here are supporters of ASL and either have or still do use ASL with their children -- their primary concern is that a child have access to full and fluent language, and fast. Have you seen exceptions to this?
Click to expand...

Yes, I don't see any oral only parents here, actually. Yes, there are parents who have ALREADY done oral only but their child is already fully grown. But the ones who have a young and still developing child seem to employ the full toolbox method.

I wonder if some deaf people are so upset about how they were raised that they push their anger towards these parents here on AD, when they really should do that to their own parents instead?

Although some parents obviously should be blamed for starting attacks. But everyone knows why they do..... their hot button is obviously their child or methods they are using for their child. Ah..... parents. :)
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No, most just want us to pat oral only parents' head and say its ok. I don't know why these full toolbox parent feel this is important.
 
Daredevel7 said:
But is FJ doing oral only herself?
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Nope and they know it. My daughter signed the entire story of Little Red Riding Hood to me this morning because she was eating and didn't want to wait to tell me.

That quote was out of context. I was asking if carrying a huge language delay isn't a big deal (and *I* think it IS a big deal, and not ok) they why are they bothering to fight against oral only.
 
I suspect that most people, if not everyone, won't believe that a deaf child will drop sign in favor of speaking EVEN THOUGH he/she has given the full toolbox approach. Parents will still be accused of forcing oral only, no matter how much the child prefers speaking.

I don't know if that is FJ's case. Frankly, I don't 100% believe most people here, especially parents. Parents are more likely to defend their ways/children and can exaggerate things. However, I also question people's responses assuming that it's true. If a deaf child DOES favor speaking over sign and the parent goes with what the child wants, do you honestly think most people here would agree with it?

I say hell no.

"Yea right, your child is just trying to please you."

"You are teaching your child subconsciously that speaking is better."

"You keep putting your child in speaking environments, no wonder why she prefers speaking. It's the only way she can communicate with others. It would be different if your child is in ASL environments."

Etc.
 
Daredevel7 said:
I suspect that most people, if not everyone, won't believe that a deaf child will drop sign in favor of speaking EVEN THOUGH he/she has given the full toolbox approach. Parents will still be accused of forcing oral only, no matter how much the child prefers speaking.

I don't know if that is FJ's case. Frankly, I don't 100% believe most people here, especially parents. Parents are more likely to defend their ways/children and can exaggerate things. However, I also question people's responses assuming that it's true. If a deaf child DOES favor speaking over sign and the parent goes with what the child wants, do you honestly think most people here would agree with it?

I say hell no.

"Yea right, your child is just trying to please you."

"You are teaching your child subconsciously that speaking is better."

"You keep putting your child in speaking environments, no wonder why she prefers speaking. It's the only way she can communicate with others. It would be different if your child is in ASL environments."

Etc.
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I have gotten every single one of these responses. All I can say is that I continue to offer both, and she has her preferences. Like I said, this morning she was signing, but that is certainly not always the case.
 
Wirelessly posted

If you put a child in a group of hearing kids, how do you think she'll handle it? I do know they will speak, but dropping ASL isn't going to help them in the long term.
 
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faire_jour said:
I have gotten every single one of these responses. All I can say is that I continue to offer both, and she has her preferences. Like I said, this morning she was signing, but that is certainly not always the case.
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Umm, excuse me, but last night you were dumbfounded there are those of us who could simultaneously sign and speak at an early age. That is very telling. *shrug*
 
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