question about nightmare..

Nika said:
I'm glad my therapist specializes in PTSD too. That is my number one criterion when searching for a new therapist.
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okay, so i lied. one more post and *then* i'm leaving for awhile.

my therapist doesn't have experience working with people who have bipolar (i'm the only client of his who has it), but he does know alot about the disorder.

when the time comes that i need to find a new therapist, i will make sure they have experience with bipolar and ptsd.
 
Jiro said:
there you go.... Other fireman with thick skin in that same situation would probably go - oh well.... and not have any nightmare about it.... which goes back to my post - "PTSD is caused by any traumatic event that a person cannot resolve with it - mentally/emotionally

."
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When my late wife passed away I did not dream because I could never sleep over 20 minutes at a time.

It took me a six month battle before I was marginally functional and when I went back to work people told me it was another year before I was my normal self again.

But I coped and did so without medication.

So did I have PTSD or not?
 
Berry said:
Do your dreams ever have a sense of humor to them?

And is that sense of humor necessarily socially acceptable?

Once my mother said the problem wasn't Hitler, it was the fact people took him seriously. If no one had ever taken him seriously, and everyone had laughed at him, he would never have had any power.

People told my mother there would never be a day in the history of the world when anyone would ever find anything funny about Hitler or his regime.

I used to think of that every time people mentioned the TV show "Hogan's Heros".

Humor is healing.
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yes a sense of humor is socially acceptable and it's usually the most preferred trait of personality for many - not required but preferred. But when it comes to dealing with traumatic/violent/bad moment... humor is not the way to deal with it. It makes some jerks think it's funny and think you want more of it. but if you like it - well then I guess Jackass tv show could use another guy.

If it's unwanted, then confront it to stop it. btw - hitler is a very very very poor example of this case. It's not that simple about what if.
 
Berry, I agree that humor can be healing in that if you are down, having a good time can make you feel better. Reading a funny book, spending some time with friends. But I don't agree that trying to make a joke out of a painful event is very healing. It's a coping mechanism.

I'll give you an example. I was in art class once and my art teacher said something about how he wishes students said something. His statement triggered me very intensely. He asked me what I thought and I said, "I don't think I could say that with a straight face!" and laughed it off. Of course he took this as a bout of irreverence.

But that was completely out of character for me. In any other case, I would have readily respected his wishes. But because for me that was traumatic material, I had to laugh it off. However, it was anything but healing. It was my way of trying to deal with pain that I hadn't yet processed.

I think one must be careful distinguishing between coping laughter and healing laughter. Many times these two types of laughter are different for each person. I've noticed that for many people coping laughter tends to be more giggly, whereas healing laughter tends to come from deeper and sound more relaxed.
 
Berry said:
So did I have PTSD or not?
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I don't think it would be safe for anyone to say you do or don't based on that one incident and how you reacted. Plus grief is a common process for people when they lose a loved one, and it happens to people with and without PTSD.
 
Hear Again said:
furthermore, i see nothing funny about one's life being threatened.

man, i need to take a break from this thread. <mad>

i'll come back after i've had time to calm down.
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I am sorry you suffered so and I am sorry that I cause you distress. Believe me when I say it is not my intent. Nor do I wish to cause you anger.

But I have spent my life laughing at myself and everyone else. I am a clown by nature and part time by profession. My funniest stories revolve around times my life was seriously in danger.

If we are going to be friends I think that in this we are just going to have to agree that on this subject we do not agree.
 
Berry said:
If we are going to be friends I think that in this we are just going to have to agree that on this subject we do not agree.
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fair enough. i'm also a person who always looks at the humorous side of life (when i'm feeling level enough to do so), but when it comes to my traumas, i can't.
 
Jiro said:
yes a sense of humor is socially acceptable and it's usually the most preferred trait of personality for many - not required but preferred.
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If it is socially acceptable then how come the sentence I have heard most often in my life is, "Michael, that is NOT funny."

And why is it the threat I have most often had directed at me is, "I'm gonna wipe that smile right off of your face" followed by "When I'm done with you you are going to laugh on the other side of your mouth?"

Jiro said:
But when it comes to dealing with traumatic/violent/bad moment... humor is not the way to deal with it. It makes some jerks think it's funny and think you want more of it.
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Have not found that to be true.

I've never met a jerk who enjoyed looking like an idiot, and I've never had one come back for more.

Jiro said:
but if you like it - well then I guess Jackass tv show could use another guy.
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I saw that show once. Did not find the humor in it.

When it comes to pain the Bible has the right of it. 'Tis better to give than to receive.


Jiro said:
If it's unwanted, then confront it to stop it.
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Humor is an interesting form of communication. It can be used to defuse a situation or ignite one. It can be used to befriend or to antagonize. It can be used to confound or confront.


Jiro said:
btw - hitler is a very very very poor example of this case. It's not that simple about what if.
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What example would you use to make the statement; "Anything given time and perspective can become funny."?
 
berry wrote: "'tis better to give than receive." while i believe this is true, i don't think it applies to the people who traumatized me. they don't deserve anything except to rot in h*ll for the things they did to me.
 
Trauma is like going at the speed of light. A lot of the laws of physics break down when an object approaches the speed of light. Likewise, a lot of the ways of dealing with life that often fail when it comes to trauma.
 
berry wrote: "anything given time and perspective can become funny."

sorry, but i disagree with this as well. nothing about emotional, sexual and/or physical abuse is funny -- or any kind of trauma for that matter.

i may learn how to cope with my traumas in therapy, but i will never look at them in a humorous light. never.
 
Nika said:
Trauma is like going at the speed of light. A lot of the laws of physics break down when an object approaches the speed of light. Likewise, a lot of the ways of dealing with life that often fail when it comes to trauma.
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*that often work
 
Nika said:
Trauma is like going at the speed of light. A lot of the laws of physics break down when an object approaches the speed of light. Likewise, a lot of the ways of dealing with life that often fail when it comes to trauma.
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hence the reason why there is such a thing as ptsd.
 
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