my lady broke up with me..

I’m not defending the girl here, but she might have left because she felt inadequate in communicating with DoVip, not necessarily another guy. Furthermore, she might not like feeling dependent on DoVip to teach her.

While DoVip would be a great teacher, I personally did not like having a boyfriend (hearing) being my primary ASL teacher. Miscommunication is going to encourage more learning, but eventually (depending on progress and enthusiasm) the romantic relationship can start to feel like more like a teacher/student relationship. If the girl is constantly being taught (even as willing participant) and she doesn’t feel like she has anything to offer the guy, it can feel overwhelming. By taking ASL classes, she is taking initiative to learn ASL without being a burden to DoVip. But until she feels more confident in her ASL and communication potential with DoVip, she withdrew from the relationship. Personally, I felt more comfortable learning ASL in a more academic environment.

DoVip did not do anything wrong. A relationship, learning a language and balancing college, it is hard to make everything a top priority. She let the relationship go because she knew she couldn’t make it a top priority in the way that DoVip deserves. I could be way off base here though…
 
what is this silly talk of statistic and some nonsense?

it's very simple - shit didn't work out. move on. find another gal. problem solved.
 
Good posting, I don't think you are off base , and that is the reality.

Many of you may disagree with me, but remember, I live in town where there is so many Deafies around and I have seen enough to believe what I learn at NTID/RIT in Deaf culture course that claims this.

Please remember, it is nearly impossible to prove because, how many of you who got married, report that you are either Deaf or hearing? That is why there is no way to determine but research shows though sample survey.



paperclip said:
I’m not defending the girl here, but she might have left because she felt inadequate in communicating with DoVip, not necessarily another guy. Furthermore, she might not like feeling dependent on DoVip to teach her.

While DoVip would be a great teacher, I personally did not like having a boyfriend (hearing) being my primary ASL teacher. Miscommunication is going to encourage more learning, but eventually (depending on progress and enthusiasm) the romantic relationship can start to feel like more like a teacher/student relationship. If the girl is constantly being taught (even as willing participant) and she doesn’t feel like she has anything to offer the guy, it can feel overwhelming. By taking ASL classes, she is taking initiative to learn ASL without being a burden to DoVip. But until she feels more confident in her ASL and communication potential with DoVip, she withdrew from the relationship. Personally, I felt more comfortable learning ASL in a more academic environment.

DoVip did not do anything wrong. A relationship, learning a language and balancing college, it is hard to make everything a top priority. She let the relationship go because she knew she couldn’t make it a top priority in the way that DoVip deserves. I could be way off base here though…
Click to expand...
 
Steel X said:
sorry to say, but I dont see any specific proof on this. I need more than just from the tv show.
Click to expand...

I just love her words which it's true. I am not only the one. My wife agreed with me and she have a lot friends from RIT. She seems them before.

I have a question for you. How many Deaf/hearing and Deaf/HOH/Deaf you seen that they are date longer?

Some hearing feels embarrassed around with Deaf when Deaf made "noise voice" when they signed.

I dated hearing girl once and it was not well then she married Deaf for 1 year then divorced then date hearing and happy around each for over 3 years. Yes, I still friend with her. She always love talking about music and I was not interesting

I have know around 400 Deaf friends from Chicago area. That's how I know what I talked about.

Deaf and Hearing are not work out because not interesting to around each due music, Deaf and hearing social (mean Deaf had a hard time to communication to his/her date hearing's friend), not same culture,
 
At least, you gain an experience to learn something that you can handle better on next relationship.

Try to think of what you doing wrong and make it right. Make from bad to good, stupid to smart, bore to fun.... etc etc...
 
Dude, what do I think? I think you should get your self another girl friend(as in like immediately), that's what I think.

Dude, any woman that can't deal with your communication issues is not the woman for you.

I've been here and done this. Nuff said...
 
DoVip, I'm really sorry about your break up. :( I think everything happens for a reason...Maybe she did like you...and wanting to learn ASL...Realized it wouldn't work out between you/her...She was being honest with you...How she felt..rather than pretending and goes along with it...You developing your stronger feelings for her...Then you ending up, realizing, wasting your time...Is that what you want? You could've find a different girl you miss out...So give her sum credit for "trying", learning ASL and being honest with you how she felt...Maybe you can be 'just friends' with her when u are healed and ready...Maybe this helps you to realize some things what you are looking for in next girl...If I were you, I wouldn't waste my time,trying to work on relationship with this girl... I'd move on, find a better deaf girl or a hearing girl that knows ASL and serious about you/her....In a relationship, I've learned good honest communication is the important key in a relationship/happiness...Life is too short... Good Luck
 
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