Dude...

I agree it is embarssing to a child to a certain extent. I doubt it is abuse though. Weird but not abuse.

I personally would not go out of my way to embarass my kids in front of their peers or attempt to make my kids popular.

Now this kid will be known to the school and the media because of what his father has done.. not because of what he himself have done.
 
StSapphire said:
Keep in mind that once you've decided what sort of a situation something is, it's quite easy to fit your observations to match, especially when you have the handy tool of "denial" to explain away even the refutations of the "victim" himself.

That was a common joke/method of teasing/bullying among people I knew in high school - one person would claim something that was perceived as negative (such as being gay) applied to a kid. If the victim responds at all, they're either "in denial" (which obviously means it's true) or they've admitted it (which also means it's true), and if they don't respond, it also means it's true, because otherwise they'd stand up for themselves.
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I'm curious .... Were you bullied or humiliated in school?
 
StSapphire said:
Keep in mind that once you've decided what sort of a situation something is, it's quite easy to fit your observations to match, especially when you have the handy tool of "denial" to explain away even the refutations of the "victim" himself.

That was a common joke/method of teasing/bullying among people I knew in high school - one person would claim something that was perceived as negative (such as being gay) applied to a kid. If the victim responds at all, they're either "in denial" (which obviously means it's true) or they've admitted it (which also means it's true), and if they don't respond, it also means it's true, because otherwise they'd stand up for themselves.
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Not sure what you were getting at. Perhaps rephrase it a bit differently in the first paragraph?
 
AlleyCat said:
I'm curious .... Were you bullied or humiliated in school?
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Yep. For pretty much all of my grade school years and the first half of my high school years, I was the nerdy kid who got teased and picked on if anyone bothered to pay any attention to me. I can't really say I had any actual friends until around my junior year in high school.

I didn't get physically bullied, presumably because early on I learned to merely ignore the teasing rather than to react in any way to it, which quickly caused the bullies to move on to their next (and presumably more entertaining, to them) targets. I instead tended to sit in the corner alone with one of my many many library books.
 
kokonut said:
Not sure what you were getting at. Perhaps rephrase it a bit differently in the first paragraph?
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Just pointing out that, if someone's already decided this kid is being abused, that even hearing him say that he's cool with it and didn't mind won't convince them, because it'll simply fall under the heading of "denial".
 
StSapphire said:
Yeah, sorry, but this really isn't all that unusual. It could simply be how his family expresses themselves. For those who see or have been harmed by abuse and similar actions, it can be hard to realize (or at least can be viewed as in bad taste) that some families honestly are comfortable enough with themselves and each other to be able to joke about things like "going to therapy" or whatnot. It's not always subconscious slips of admittance, sometimes there's really just not anything wrong.

Also, you need to stop being reasonable, because you're hurting my e-reputation. I'm supposed to disagree with you all the time. Go back to talking about politics or something where we vehemently disagree. :P
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Well, I don't go through this whole disagreeableness routine just for spite. If I agree, I agree. If I don't. I don't. Not afraid either way. :cool2:
 
StSapphire said:
Just pointing out that, if someone's already decided this kid is being abused, that even hearing him say that he's cool with it and didn't mind won't convince them, because it'll simply fall under the heading of "denial".
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A pre-determined bias, you'd say? Or something bigger?
 
StSapphire said:
Yep. For pretty much all of my grade school years and the first half of my high school years, I was the nerdy kid who got teased and picked on if anyone bothered to pay any attention to me. I can't really say I had any actual friends until around my junior year in high school.

I didn't get physically bullied, presumably because early on I learned to merely ignore the teasing rather than to react in any way to it, which quickly caused the bullies to move on to their next (and presumably more entertaining, to them) targets. I instead tended to sit in the corner alone with one of my many many library books.
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So you have a slight idea, then. And you can't empathize with this kid at all. (You learned early on to ignore it and let the bullies move on. Any/No chance that happened to this kid?) Oh well.

(Meaning: you don't know about this kid, do you?)
 
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kokonut said:
Well, I don't go through this whole disagreeableness routine just for spite. If I agree, I agree. If I don't. I don't. Not afraid either way. :cool2:
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Hah, well I still agreed with you here, so I roll with it too. :P

AlleyCat: I'm on my way home, I want to respond to your post but don't have time just yet cause I'm running late for my bus, so I'll get to that in a little bit.
 
Regardless of what gets posted any further in this thread:

I am bowing out. To think that the word "therapy" is even mentioned for donations on their blog is ludricious (sp? spell check won't pick up this one!)

Every person, every child, has endured their own form of childhood, whether it be totally "normal" (depends on how you want to define that), or one subject to humiliation, or one subject to abuse, whatnot. Why we're even discussing this any further is beyond me. If you are not the child in this actual article, you cannot begin to understand what he's thinking/feeling, even it turns out to be "nothing."

St. Sapphire - I do understand you're on your way home. I'm not writing this so I don't have to respond to your post. I'm so disturbed by the casualness of this thread that I'm just choosing not to participate anymore. To each his/her own thinking.
 
jillio said:
Yes. And when that humilation comes from a parent, it is multiplied in the negative effects it has on that child's entire life.
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Yeah, I've been there and when I think about this it's hard not to twitch in rage even though it's been years after the event.
 
AlleyCat said:
Regardless of what gets posted any further in this thread:

I am bowing out. To think that the word "therapy" is even mentioned for donations on their blog is ludricious (sp? spell check won't pick up this one!)

Every person, every child, has endured their own form of childhood, whether it be totally "normal" (depends on how you want to define that), or one subject to humiliation, or one subject to abuse, whatnot. Why we're even discussing this any further is beyond me. If you are not the child in this actual article, you cannot begin to understand what he's thinking/feeling, even it turns out to be "nothing."

St. Sapphire - I do understand you're on your way home. I'm not writing this so I don't have to respond to your post. I'm so disturbed by the casualness of this thread that I'm just choosing not to participate anymore. To each his/her own thinking.
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You've never heard anyone joke about needing therapy? ie. "If this ____ keeps doing _____ I am going to need therapy.......

Clearly a joke. Some families communicate their love in fun ways that others just don't understand. *shrug*
 
TXgolfer,

My family is like that, too. I got that same warped humor. It's what keeps us alive.
 
TXgolfer said:
You've never heard anyone joke about needing therapy? ie. "If this ____ keeps doing _____ I am going to need therapy.......
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Even as the actual request for donations? Ok, sorry, my bad.

*shrug*
 
AlleyCat said:
Even as the actual request for donations? Ok, sorry, my bad.

*shrug*
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I saw a woman have her PhD hanging in the Laundry room of her house with a tip jar below it.

I have seen tip jars at my Local Starbucks with "Therapy Fund.... Because I have to deal with you BEFORE you get your coffee" on it

Tip Jars with "College Fund" on it. One said. "College Fund....My parents were hippies. Please help"

That is the way I took it. *shrug*x infinity.....
 
I'm disappointed in you. I think you understand why. If you want to sacrifice the good values youve shown so you can buddy up with these guys, so be it. Too bad there isn't an obvious difference to you between a stripper begging for money and a kid not needing to be humiliated. Oh well.
 
AlleyCat said:
I'm disappointed in you. I think you understand why. If you want to sacrifice the good values youve shown so you can buddy up with these guys, so be it. Too bad there isn't an obvious difference to you between a stripper begging for money and a kid not needing to be humiliated. Oh well.
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Well now.... Actually I don't care much for e-begging. That part I don't like.... But I don't have a problem with "therapy fund" on the button. I clearly see the joke.

In short. I have a problem with the button....but not the words on it.
 
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