Discipline-What Methods Do You Use?

I think my wife and I are probably a combo of all of then but uninvolved. We try to give warmth every time and explain. There are times we tell them it that way or nothing at all. We also try do both at the same time. It just depends what they did wrong.
 
posts from hell said:
My parents let me do whatever I wanted. Hence my experience with various types of bombs. Google Earth still shows a hole where I set a bomb off more than 10 years ago.

How I parent my kid is very simple and has been very very effective. I strongly believe it depends on the child their selves. My daughter has been super easy to this point.

I don't want to tell my daughter "no" but I will offer her "do this and that will happen, or do that and this will happen."

She usually takes the smart way out.
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Excellent technique......similar to the way I raised mine.

I got totally lucky though....mine never did anything bad except for cussing a ref when she was 5. They still talk about her at the YMCA....
 
rockin'robin said:
When they were small, a smack on the hand or a smack on the rear usually means "NO"!....When they became teenagers, that's where the hard part begins....having rules in ur home is imperative, as I have mine, and expect them to be followed. Grounding, taking away what they enjoy for a few days, has worked for me.....if it's something really serious, then it's a month of being grounded, no phone, computer, games, etc., and only 1 hour of TV...I expect them to read, help me around the house, give them chores that I usually do myself...and teach them the proper way they are to be done. So they do get a "learning experience" from that also.....

I've also made a mandatory rule in my home..."Never lie or steal from me."....Consequences follow more harshly if they are broken.

Of course, my boys "think" that I'm too strict and harsh at times. But I've not had any serious problems with them. And being a single parent of 3 boys, it's not easy, especially when they are hearing and I'm deaf.

My 16 yr. old has recently become "more vocal" with his opinions.....and does argue with me at times....so "patience"...."prayer"...and hoping for the best is all I can do.

I do expect a "yes mamm, no mamm"...and never calling adults by their first names...Only Mr. or Ms. ....taking their hats off at the dinner table, washing their hands often...so it's basically a vocal repeat and repeat.....

We also always never fail to give thanks before each meal....

My old-fashioned ideals still work....but whether or not my teachings will follow them into adulthood...is yet to be seen....I know some of them will, some not.....And they always call me if they spend the night out with a friend. That rule is mandatory, they must call to let me know everything is OK and what time they will be home.

You can't demand respect from ur children, we have to earn it also....and when my 13 yr. old told a friend of mine, that I was very strict, but he respected me.....I was thrilled!....Hugs and a kiss on the cheek is very common around my home, and giving individual attention is very important also.
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I love this. I really want to implement this when my son is older. :hmm:
Unfortunately, my 13 month is is going though these tantrums lately. It wasn't so bad at first, I basically knew what he wanted so he would calm down right away, there was always a reason before. But now...... Yesterday, my son and I were at the grandparents and my son just started going nuts out of nowhere. He did not want to sit and play with his toys so I tried taking a walk with him (he hasn't mastered it just yet, so i hold his hands and we go together), that was not it. He threw himself, or tried to, on the floor. I was horrified! Checked his diaper, gave him juice, tried a cookie, milk, held him, got out some different toys....nothing worked. When he pulls this at home, I put him to bed for time out. I'm a patient woman but at some point I think he needs to sit down and chill. I check on him after and once he has calmed down, I'll pick him up again. At his grandmother's there is no crib so it was a lot more difficult to satisfy him. He wasn't tired he had just woke up from a 2 hour nap...

He hasn't mastered any signs so communication between us is based on face expressions which works well, when he wants to get something across...most of the time. He's a good boy most of the time. This literally just started happening about two weeks ago. I'm a bit flustered.

Is this a new stage? Should I give him a light spanking on his rump? I've only ever lightly smacked his hand when he tried to smack after being kissed. He dislikes kisses. -__- Any advice.
 
Ignore it. It's common for them to throw a fit like that. This is a good opportunity to show him sign language on how he feels though.
Or have a time out spot for him-have him stay there for a minute.

You know what,if you have been feeling stress,your baby can sense it. So maybe you need some" me" time.
 
deafgal001 said:
Ignore it. It's common for them to throw a fit like that. This is a good opportunity to show him sign language on how he feels though.
Or have a time out spot for him-have him stay there for a minute.
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As for the sign, he's not really picking it up well. Granted I started two months ago, but I'm not getting much. I still use them. Edmund are you....tired, hungry, thirsty and so on...

Time-out spot is usually the crib. He scoots everywhere since he's decided to skip the crawling stage...I was looking forward to it too! I've tried time-out out of the crib at the grandmothers yesterday and he threw himself back. I'd let him cry it out but grandma won't let him. Even when I insist...At least pap pap agreed with me. (the grandpa)
 
ProudMommy89 said:
As for the sign, he's not really picking it up well. Granted I started two months ago, but I'm not getting much. I still use them. Edmund are you....tired, hungry, thirsty and so on...

Time-out spot is usually the crib. He scoots everywhere since he's decided to skip the crawling stage...I was looking forward to it too! I've tried time-out out of the crib at the grandmothers yesterday and he threw himself back. I'd let him cry it out but grandma won't let him. Even when I insist...At least pap pap agreed with me. (the grandpa)
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One rule I have is never use a room or spot that is for sleeping for displine. I'm afraid they will fight sleep. Playpen is better. I agree too.let him cry itout.
 
ProudMommy89 said:
I love this. I really want to implement this when my son is older. :hmm:
Unfortunately, my 13 month is is going though these tantrums lately. It wasn't so bad at first, I basically knew what he wanted so he would calm down right away, there was always a reason before. But now...... Yesterday, my son and I were at the grandparents and my son just started going nuts out of nowhere. He did not want to sit and play with his toys so I tried taking a walk with him (he hasn't mastered it just yet, so i hold his hands and we go together), that was not it. He threw himself, or tried to, on the floor. I was horrified! Checked his diaper, gave him juice, tried a cookie, milk, held him, got out some different toys....nothing worked. When he pulls this at home, I put him to bed for time out. I'm a patient woman but at some point I think he needs to sit down and chill. I check on him after and once he has calmed down, I'll pick him up again. At his grandmother's there is no crib so it was a lot more difficult to satisfy him. He wasn't tired he had just woke up from a 2 hour nap...

He hasn't mastered any signs so communication between us is based on face expressions which works well, when he wants to get something across...most of the time. He's a good boy most of the time. This literally just started happening about two weeks ago. I'm a bit flustered.

Is this a new stage? Should I give him a light spanking on his rump? I've only ever lightly smacked his hand when he tried to smack after being kissed. He dislikes kisses. -__- Any advice.
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No, don't spank him. Ignore it. As long as he gets a response he will continue to throw tantrums. And I agree with deafgal. Once he has calmed down, you can begin to show him signs for his emotions, such as angry. If he has the signs or words, that he needs to communicate feelings he will not need to throw a tantrum to communicate.
 
I am probably some combination of Authoritarian and Authoritative. Yes there are some days I'm probably more on edge and it's just where anything and everything can annoy me. Other days I am just like OK, I want you to behave and if you don't this will happen.
 
ProudMommy89 said:
Alright then, I'll try that. Thankfully I DO have a playpen. So I'll try putting him in there.
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That makes an excellent time out area. Make sure you put a cuddly toy in with him, or a favorite blanket, so he can learn to comfort himself when he is upset.
 
Dixie said:
I am probably some combination of Authoritarian and Authoritative. Yes there are some days I'm probably more on edge and it's just where anything and everything can annoy me. Other days I am just like OK, I want you to behave and if you don't this will happen.
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I am the same as well.

My hubby is Authoritative due to his military background.
 
I like the permissive method best. I actually don't agree with disciplining children (or with-holding love in general)... The ideal thing would be to have a positive, supportive, involved relationship in which both parent and child trust each-other and the needs of the child are constantly met. Kind of get rids of the "need" for discipline.
 
I just threaten my child :dunno2:.

Nah, I pretty much let consequences follow action. You throw a fit about your food, you don't eat. You lose your allowance/toy/etc., I'm not replacing it. Scratch your DVD, sucks for you. If you can't get ready for bed in 20 minutes, then your tv/toys/playtime ends a lot sooner.

If you annoy me, I send you elsewhere in the house.

If you can't stop whining, then I assume you need a nap.

et cetera

*shrugs*

Works for us.
 
A 2x4 works well for us. ;) :lol: Just kidding. If my daughter throws a fit she gets sent upstairs with no toys, books, games or TV for about 30 mins until she cools down then we talk it out. If she complains about her dinner, she is told to finish it then immediately must go upstairs. If she doesn't go to bed or fights to stay up then she has to go to bed 30 mins early for the rest of the week. I send her to bed at 8:30 and no later than 9:30 on weekends. If she doesn't cooperate getting ready for school the next morning she has to go to bed an additional 30 minutes early. If she starts whining she has to take a nap. If she brings home 'frowny faces' in her parent-teacher journal she loses privileges for the week. We keep the rules simple and the discipline effective. I've had to spank her a few times when she was sent upstairs for bad behavior and continued to throw a tantrum, a couple of pops on the posterior got her attention quickly to know that kind of behavior is not acceptable.
 
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