Deaf Teacher VS Hearing Teacher

[warneri]

Hello there community! I am a hearing parent of a deaf child.

We've been working with our daughter on our sign language skills since she was 11 months old, and we have more or less progressed at the same rate as her. Best we can tell on campus we seem to be at sort of a children's level of signing, although some of those children definitely out-sign us, too!

I recently was considering my relationships with deaf teachers, and wondering to myself why I always get along with deaf teachers better than I do with hearing teachers. Has any other parents had this experience?

Here's a link to the blog article I wrote about it
http://warnerjessicai.wix.com/wehea...Teachers-Better/cn20/556025d00cf298b2d3da20bf

Read it if you like, but what I really am interested in is feedback from other parents. I realize this might not be the right place to ask this question, but it was the first place that came to mind. o_O

 

[soutthpaw]

I commend you. I taught DHH for a couple years and my ex has been teaching DHH for 15+ years. Both of us are Deaf. When you realize how rare your situation is (parents that actively make every effort to learn their child's natural language and "really" act in their child's best interest,) you will understand why (here is the secret) the Deaf teachers have a stronger connection to you than hearing teachers do. It's not really your connection to them, but their connection to you. They respect you and out you up on a pedestal. It's really hard to understand how much one's own parents really love us when they could never make the effort to learn to Sign. I lost my hearing as an adult, But I had already been learning ASL. I decided to get CI at urging of my parents in order to make them happy and keep communication open with them. However, over the years it has driven a wedge between us. We are basically just cordial now. I tolerate them because they are my kids grandparents, but I avoid them as much as possible because they really don't accept me for who I really am. My Ex was identified Deaf as a toddler. Fortunately.learned sign early. Yet neither of her parents learned ASL..amd her mom was an ESL elementary teacher too!
Also please use Deaf or Hard of Hearing. Hearing impaired is considered an insult.

 

[Bebonang]

I read your blog. I like it.

Most hearing parents like my parents may have love their deaf children, but they are not listening (watching us gestures to getting through them to make understand what the deaf children need). Both of my parents, even my sister has never sign. They would rather have me talked to them than signing. My sister learned to spell alphabets only. That was the problem with them.

I was born deaf and my parents probably did not know about my deafness until I was about 8 years old. I went to the University hospital and they went through tests with me for a while. I think the doctor finally told my mother (I don't remember my Dad being there) that I am deaf. I was very happy to be deaf anyway as I was born with it. I got my first hearing aid (left ear) and totally profound deaf in my right ear almost close to 9 years old. I did not speak until I went through Speech therapy at the elementary mainstream school in 1st grade. I was never in Kindergarten.

In the elementary mainstream school, I was in special education with no ASL, just only Oral-only method. I had a hard time understand hearing teachers including deaf students without using gestures or ASL. Speaking with them is like a one way street instead of two way streets. I was frustrated and depress about not be able to understand what everyone is saying in oral-only. It was the same thing in high school mainstream school which I don't like as I had a lot of frustration not understand hearing teachers and hearing students. No ASL to learn and no ASL interpreter as it is not allowed in mainstream school. I had begged the principal to have ASL in the school so that we can learn to sign and to have ASL interpreters. I am not the only one and there are other deaf students who want to have ASL, too. Hearing aid(s) does not help us to understand what is going on in the classrooms at all. We had to depend on reading the books but no discussion participation not following on what others discussed. I had never lift my hand to answer the questions but I don't know if other deaf students had lift their hands if they knew what the teachers asked the questions. That is why we want and need ASL interpreters and special accommodations to help us get good grades and to understand what is going on in the classrooms.

Finally, my mother took me to visit the Deaf school when I was in 9th or 10th grade. We try to tell the superintendent that I need to come into the Deaf school but I don't know what is between my mother and the superintendent talked about. He told me that if I stay in the Deaf school I would pass with flying colors with no problems. He turned me down and told me to stay in the mainstream school. I was upset and angry at both of them. No one hear me or listen to my needs. Why do I have to suffered under them when they don't know nothing about deafness and the struggles that we had to go through? That is agony.

Having Deaf teachers in the Deaf schools would be much better to communicate with us about the lessons that we need to learn. I don't know about the hearing mainstream schools for Deaf teachers, but I hope the mainstream schools hired Deaf teachers to teach us, Deafies, so that we can understand and get good grades. Hearing teachers are no better than Deaf teachers. Sorry about my rant.

 

[shel90]

I agree with what southpaw said. I teach DHH students too and it always distresses me to learn that several of my students' parents havent learned ASL but when I do meet parentswho have learned ASL for their children, I immediately gravitate towards them because they can understand their deaf children's needs.

 

[CrazyPaul]

I read your blog. I like it.

Most hearing parents like my parents may have love their deaf children, but they are not listening (watching us gestures to getting through them to make understand what the deaf children need). Both of my parents, even my sister has never sign. They would rather have me talked to them than signing. My sister learned to spell alphabets only. That was the problem with them.

I was born deaf and my parents probably did not know about my deafness until I was about 8 years old. I went to the University hospital and they went through tests with me for a while. I think the doctor finally told my mother (I don't remember my Dad being there) that I am deaf. I was very happy to be deaf anyway as I was born with it. I got my first hearing aid (left ear) and totally profound deaf in my right ear almost close to 9 years old. I did not speak until I went through Speech therapy at the elementary mainstream school in 1st grade. I was never in Kindergarten.

In the elementary mainstream school, I was in special education with no ASL, just only Oral-only method. I had a hard time understand hearing teachers including deaf students without using gestures or ASL. Speaking with them is like a one way street instead of two way streets. I was frustrated and depress about not be able to understand what everyone is saying in oral-only. It was the same thing in high school mainstream school which I don't like as I had a lot of frustration not understand hearing teachers and hearing students. No ASL to learn and no ASL interpreter as it is not allowed in mainstream school. I had begged the principal to have ASL in the school so that we can learn to sign and to have ASL interpreters. I am not the only one and there are other deaf students who want to have ASL, too. Hearing aid(s) does not help us to understand what is going on in the classrooms at all. We had to depend on reading the books but no discussion participation not following on what others discussed. I had never lift my hand to answer the questions but I don't know if other deaf students had lift their hands if they knew what the teachers asked the questions. That is why we want and need ASL interpreters and special accommodations to help us get good grades and to understand what is going on in the classrooms.

Finally, my mother took me to visit the Deaf school when I was in 9th or 10th grade. We try to tell the superintendent that I need to come into the Deaf school but I don't know what is between my mother and the superintendent talked about. He told me that if I stay in the Deaf school I would pass with flying colors with no problems. He turned me down and told me to stay in the mainstream school. I was upset and angry at both of them. No one hear me or listen to my needs. Why do I have to suffered under them when they don't know nothing about deafness and the struggles that we had to go through? That is agony.

Having Deaf teachers in the Deaf schools would be much better to communicate with us about the lessons that we need to learn. I don't know about the hearing mainstream schools for Deaf teachers, but I hope the mainstream schools hired Deaf teachers to teach us, Deafies, so that we can understand and get good grades. Hearing teachers are no better than Deaf teachers. Sorry about my rant.

He won't let you in because you are too smart regardless of your deafness? Scratch my head...Because there are many smart students at deaf schools. What deaf school are you talking about?

 

[Jane B.]

Also please use Deaf or Hard of Hearing. Hearing impaired is considered an insult.

I DO NOT understand AT ALL why "hearing impaired" should be an insult and "hard of hearing" is ok !!!!!!!!!!! They describe the same thing! I find it taking political correctness way too far.

By the way, I am completely deaf in one ear and have a profound loss in the other one.

 

[whatdidyousay!]

I commend you. I taught DHH for a couple years and my ex has been teaching DHH for 15+ years. Both of us are Deaf. When you realize how rare your situation is (parents that actively make every effort to learn their child's natural language and "really" act in their child's best interest,) you will understand why (here is the secret) the Deaf teachers have a stronger connection to you than hearing teachers do. It's not really your connection to them, but their connection to you. They respect you and out you up on a pedestal. It's really hard to understand how much one's own parents really love us when they could never make the effort to learn to Sign. I lost my hearing as an adult, But I had already been learning ASL. I decided to get CI at urging of my parents in order to make them happy and keep communication open with them. However, over the years it has driven a wedge between us. We are basically just cordial now. I tolerate them because they are my kids grandparents, but I avoid them as much as possible because they really don't accept me for who I really am. My Ex was identified Deaf as a toddler. Fortunately.learned sign early. Yet neither of her parents learned ASL..amd her mom was an ESL elementary teacher too!
Also please use Deaf or Hard of Hearing. Hearing impaired is considered an insult.

Hearing impaired is not an insult to everyone hoh , I call myself hearing impaired b/c that it what I am . My ears are impaired which cause me to be hoh.

 

[soutthpaw]

I DO NOT understand AT ALL why "hearing impaired" should be an insult and "hard of hearing" is ok !!!!!!!!!!! They describe the same thing! I find it taking political correctness way too far.

By the way, I am completely deaf in one ear and have a profound loss in the other one.

Here is a quote from NAD

"Hearing-impaired – This term was at one time preferred, largely because it was viewed as politically correct. To declare oneself or another person as deaf or blind, for example, was considered somewhat bold, rude, or impolite. At that time, it was thought better to use the word “impaired” along with “visually,” “hearing,” “mobility,” and so on. “Hearing-impaired” was a well-meaning term that is not accepted or used by many deaf and hard of hearing people.
For many people, the words “deaf” and “hard of hearing” are not negative. Instead, the term “hearing-impaired” is viewed as negative. The term focuses on what people can’t do. It establishes the standard as “hearing” and anything different as “impaired,” or substandard, hindered, or damaged. It implies that something is not as it should be and ought to be fixed if possible. To be fair, this is probably not what people intended to convey by the term “hearing impaired.”
Every individual is unique, but there is one thing we all have in common: we all want to be treated with respect. To the best of our own unique abilities, we have families, friends, communities, and lives that are just as fulfilling as anyone else. We may be different, but we are not less.
What’s in a name? Plenty! Words and labels can have a profound effect on people. Show your respect for people by refusing to use outdated or offensive terms. When in doubt, ask the individual how they identify themselves."

For me, is not as much about HI is negative as that I have pride in being Deaf and Deaf Culture and want people to refer to me and other Deaf people correctly. Also if I tell someone I'm hearing impaired, they usually assume I have some hearing left. Even with my CI I'm still Deaf. I just have a technology that gives me some ability to hear. That does not make me hearing because I cannot hear the same way hearing people can. This preference for terms is specific to those who consider themselves Culturally Deaf. I know many "forehead hearing" (ASL gloss) people who use and refer to themselves as HI.

 

[Bebonang]

He won't let you in because you are too smart regardless of your deafness? Scratch my head...Because there are many smart students at deaf schools. What deaf school are you talking about?

I went to the mainstream schools in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

The Deaf School that I wanted to attend was Minnesota State Academy for the Deaf (formerly the old Minnesota School for the Deaf Before changing to MSAD) back in early 1960.

 

[deafdyke]

I DO NOT understand AT ALL why "hearing impaired" should be an insult and "hard of hearing" is ok !!!!!!!!!!! They describe the same thing! I find it taking political correctness way too far.

By the way, I am completely deaf in one ear and have a profound loss in the other one.

Would you call a gay or lesbian person hetrosexual impaired, or a woman Y chromosome impaired?

 

[whatdidyousay!]

Would you call a gay or lesbian person hetrosexual impaired, or a woman Y chromosome impaired?

When someone said being called 'hearing impaired' is an insult to everyone here , it bug me . I don't like people speaking for me about my hearing lost and saying what I do or don't like. A person would be best to say that is an insult to them and let other people speak for their self then we would not be having this conversation all the time.

 

[soutthpaw]

When someone said being called 'hearing impaired' is an insult to everyone here , it bug me . I don't like people speaking for me about my hearing lost and saying what I do or don't like. A person would be best to say that is an insult to them and let other people speak for their self then we would not be having this conversation all the time.

Well Hearing Impaired is generally viewed as derogatory by the Culturally Deaf community. Same as derogatory names for various ethnic groups. Nothing wrong with you staying your own preference.

 

[warneri]

I commend you. I taught DHH for a couple years and my ex has been teaching DHH for 15+ years. Both of us are Deaf. When you realize how rare your situation is (parents that actively make every effort to learn their child's natural language and "really" act in their child's best interest,) you will understand why (here is the secret) the Deaf teachers have a stronger connection to you than hearing teachers do. It's not really your connection to them, but their connection to you. They respect you and out you up on a pedestal. It's really hard to understand how much one's own parents really love us when they could never make the effort to learn to Sign. I lost my hearing as an adult, But I had already been learning ASL. I decided to get CI at urging of my parents in order to make them happy and keep communication open with them. However, over the years it has driven a wedge between us. We are basically just cordial now. I tolerate them because they are my kids grandparents, but I avoid them as much as possible because they really don't accept me for who I really am. My Ex was identified Deaf as a toddler. Fortunately.learned sign early. Yet neither of her parents learned ASL..amd her mom was an ESL elementary teacher too!
Also please use Deaf or Hard of Hearing. Hearing impaired is considered an insult.

Thank you for the insight!! That really does put things in a different perspective, doesn't it? And thank you for the tip! That is one of the scary parts of being a hearing parent in this world, I don't always understand the ins and outs of what is and isn't offensive, and it seems like it changes depending on who you are talking to. I've come across deaf individuals were very offended at the deaf label, too, and I feel bad when I have to use that word but I sort of lack a better one. o_O But it's good to know that hearing impaired is insulting, and that makes sense to me now that I think about it. Thank you again.

 

[warneri]

I read your blog. I like it.

Most hearing parents like my parents may have love their deaf children, but they are not listening (watching us gestures to getting through them to make understand what the deaf children need). Both of my parents, even my sister has never sign. They would rather have me talked to them than signing. My sister learned to spell alphabets only. That was the problem with them.

I was born deaf and my parents probably did not know about my deafness until I was about 8 years old. I went to the University hospital and they went through tests with me for a while. I think the doctor finally told my mother (I don't remember my Dad being there) that I am deaf. I was very happy to be deaf anyway as I was born with it. I got my first hearing aid (left ear) and totally profound deaf in my right ear almost close to 9 years old. I did not speak until I went through Speech therapy at the elementary mainstream school in 1st grade. I was never in Kindergarten.

In the elementary mainstream school, I was in special education with no ASL, just only Oral-only method. I had a hard time understand hearing teachers including deaf students without using gestures or ASL. Speaking with them is like a one way street instead of two way streets. I was frustrated and depress about not be able to understand what everyone is saying in oral-only. It was the same thing in high school mainstream school which I don't like as I had a lot of frustration not understand hearing teachers and hearing students. No ASL to learn and no ASL interpreter as it is not allowed in mainstream school. I had begged the principal to have ASL in the school so that we can learn to sign and to have ASL interpreters. I am not the only one and there are other deaf students who want to have ASL, too. Hearing aid(s) does not help us to understand what is going on in the classrooms at all. We had to depend on reading the books but no discussion participation not following on what others discussed. I had never lift my hand to answer the questions but I don't know if other deaf students had lift their hands if they knew what the teachers asked the questions. That is why we want and need ASL interpreters and special accommodations to help us get good grades and to understand what is going on in the classrooms.

Finally, my mother took me to visit the Deaf school when I was in 9th or 10th grade. We try to tell the superintendent that I need to come into the Deaf school but I don't know what is between my mother and the superintendent talked about. He told me that if I stay in the Deaf school I would pass with flying colors with no problems. He turned me down and told me to stay in the mainstream school. I was upset and angry at both of them. No one hear me or listen to my needs. Why do I have to suffered under them when they don't know nothing about deafness and the struggles that we had to go through? That is agony.

Having Deaf teachers in the Deaf schools would be much better to communicate with us about the lessons that we need to learn. I don't know about the hearing mainstream schools for Deaf teachers, but I hope the mainstream schools hired Deaf teachers to teach us, Deafies, so that we can understand and get good grades. Hearing teachers are no better than Deaf teachers. Sorry about my rant.

I enjoyed reading your 'rant', it was also very insightful as to what it's like growing up in a deaf person's shoes. When my daughter was young, very young...like 2 or 3, I used to dream about her going to mainstream school just like Cecile, and her implant working as it did in the demo videos, but I immediatly realized how selfish of a hope that was to have for her the first time I was on campus at Phx Day School for the Deaf and couldn't understand anything around me very well. Now, granted...I signed, but I've been learning along with and at her level and the first time we were walking through the campus she was about 4. So we talked like 4 year olds, lol. Everybody signed so fast!! I instantly realized that if she was in mainstream school, this would be her experience, and I did not want that for her. I've since had to fight tooth and nail against school districts just to keep her in the deaf school, but thankfully, I've got a lot of friends on the staff at that school that were willing and ready to fight with me for my daughters education. We have since learned that, being in Arizona, my daughter will not actually "graduate". We have no special education program out here, and going to a specialized school is the equivellent of being home schooled as far as the certificate you can receive upon completion. We just learned that this past December and gave very hard contemplation to homeschooling her instead, so that her certificate might "look better". I think this might be why they encouraged you to stay in mainstream school if you were capable, you would actually graduate. It's hard to say which route is better, a piece of paper or a more thorough education. At any rate, we discussed it with out daughter and she told us she does not want to leave PDSD, the children there are the same as her and so we have nixed the thought and just continue to supplement her education with lesson plans at home as well. I'm sorry you've had a rough road in life, but just know that it is diamonds that are forged under pressure, and mud that is made on the surface.

 

[warneri]

I agree with what southpaw said. I teach DHH students too and it always distresses me to learn that several of my students' parents havent learned ASL but when I do meet parentswho have learned ASL for their children, I immediately gravitate towards them because they can understand their deaf children's needs.

This makes sense, and I appreciate your feedback. I guess the key to really understanding truly is seeing it from the other side, yeah? I have no idea what it's like to be a teacher to these children, just a mum...and I really appreciate y'all as teachers taking the time out of your surely busy schedule to share with me.

 

[warneri]

He won't let you in because you are too smart regardless of your deafness? Scratch my head...Because there are many smart students at deaf schools. What deaf school are you talking about?

It might be a matter of what "diplomas" are given in that state. Like out here for example a child who goes through our deaf schools does not technically graduate, nor do they receive a diploma. They are viewed more or less as the same as homeschooled children, and receive only a certificate of completion of the deaf program. There is no deaf diploma out here, and not all, but most deaf children out here cannot quite accomplish the standardized testing. I personally think it's incredibly unfair that there isn't a deaf equivellent test for these standardized testings, but that's a big blockade for some of the children out here. This might have been what caused him to turn them down, if they had made it this far in mainstream school they were now only 3 or 4 years away from graduation/diploma, they might have been giving that up without realizing it. Now, I'm not the right person to debate which route is "right" or "better", but just a different perspective that might shed some light on it.

 

[warneri]

I DO NOT understand AT ALL why "hearing impaired" should be an insult and "hard of hearing" is ok !!!!!!!!!!! They describe the same thing! I find it taking political correctness way too far.

By the way, I am completely deaf in one ear and have a profound loss in the other one.

Thank you for your feedback! I don't either, but I try to err on the side of caution because the last thing I want to do is offend anyone, and usually the people I'm signing to are my daughters friends and teachers lol. I've found in my years with this that different people (and this isn't a deaf thing, this is a general thing lol) will always take different things to offense, at different levels and at different times. You can't please everyone. But I've also found that as long as I'm being my generally sweet self and trying my best, most people tend to forgive and fill me in when I've done something offensive. Like the time I accidentally signed "home sex" instead of "home work" Big oops!! lol!!

 

[warneri]

Hearing impaired is not an insult to everyone hoh , I call myself hearing impaired b/c that it what I am . My ears are impaired which cause me to be hoh.

I really appreciate y'all showing me both perspectives on this. I get where you're coming from, it's a literal term and not intended to be offensive.

I am incredibly near sighted. A few inches away from my face and all I see is fuzzy color. When my daughter was young I used this as a way to show her, we are all different and we all have different abilities and set backs we have to over come. Mommy is visually impaired; my eyes don't work very good. I use glasses so I can see clearly. Lizzie is hearing impaired; her ears don't work very good. We used sign language so she can understand clearly. We tried hearing aids and the AB cochlear implant and they didn't work for Lizzie either, so we just stopped using them. She seemed to understand this and although she doesn't want to wear her implant she likes to see me wear my glasses instead of my contacts. I guess maybe it kind of reminds her that Mommy ain't perfect either

 

[warneri]

Here is a quote from NAD

"Hearing-impaired – This term was at one time preferred, largely because it was viewed as politically correct. To declare oneself or another person as deaf or blind, for example, was considered somewhat bold, rude, or impolite. At that time, it was thought better to use the word “impaired” along with “visually,” “hearing,” “mobility,” and so on. “Hearing-impaired” was a well-meaning term that is not accepted or used by many deaf and hard of hearing people.
For many people, the words “deaf” and “hard of hearing” are not negative. Instead, the term “hearing-impaired” is viewed as negative. The term focuses on what people can’t do. It establishes the standard as “hearing” and anything different as “impaired,” or substandard, hindered, or damaged. It implies that something is not as it should be and ought to be fixed if possible. To be fair, this is probably not what people intended to convey by the term “hearing impaired.”
Every individual is unique, but there is one thing we all have in common: we all want to be treated with respect. To the best of our own unique abilities, we have families, friends, communities, and lives that are just as fulfilling as anyone else. We may be different, but we are not less.
What’s in a name? Plenty! Words and labels can have a profound effect on people. Show your respect for people by refusing to use outdated or offensive terms. When in doubt, ask the individual how they identify themselves."

For me, is not as much about HI is negative as that I have pride in being Deaf and Deaf Culture and want people to refer to me and other Deaf people correctly. Also if I tell someone I'm hearing impaired, they usually assume I have some hearing left. Even with my CI I'm still Deaf. I just have a technology that gives me some ability to hear. That does not make me hearing because I cannot hear the same way hearing people can. This preference for terms is specific to those who consider themselves Culturally Deaf. I know many "forehead hearing" (ASL gloss) people who use and refer to themselves as HI.

Whoaaa! Mind = blown. Haha. I really like your perspective, you remind me of Mr. Cobb! The last thing I want to do is offend someone so I do generally try to figure out how they label themselves before I go throwing terms out there, lol..but sometimes that is hard and you need a label. I'm glad you are comfortable with the Deaf label, I have met some who are not and have presented the whole "deaf" as labeling me by the 1 thing I cannot do and that was the first time I had heard it put that way. This is like totally the opposite. It's so confusing for a person who did not grow up in and fully understand the culture. I appreciate y'all sharing your perspectives and information with me, it's not always a clear sea we navigate in life!

P.s. - I have NO idea what forehead hearing is..o_O You totally lost me on that one...

 

[warneri]

Would you call a gay or lesbian person hetrosexual impaired, or a woman Y chromosome impaired?

lmao - it's funny because it's true! you totally wouldn't, people would look at you so weird...