being a peacemaker.... (a public apology)

A

apathrev

Guest
A couple weeks ago, I attended a Revolution Church service (the link in my signature) and Jay Bakker spoke on the Beattitudes, and one part Jay had a very interesting view on was the passage "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called Sons of God." And I got to thinking about how this relates to me in my life.

I get into quite a few debates on here, primarily with ravensteve, and sometimes I get really frustrated. I do not agree with your ideas at all, and it boils my blood sometime just to read your posts, but that is beside the point. I wanted to say to anyone on here who I've gotten into arguements with, whomever I might have crossed, or anyone that I've just downright disagreed with, no matter how right I thought I was. This does not go just towards ravensteve, but especially to him. I'm sorry. It is not right for me to sit here behind a computer and try to argue my point of view with as much fervor as I have. This is not an admission of wrong, but a olive branch of peace. I am apologzing for the arguements, the debates, and whatever else I might have said that has caused tension to anyone. I still have the same convictions, and I am a very opinionated person. Sometimes I get a big head and no matter how right I feel, it is not right for me to try and try to argue with someone I'll likely never meet, and much less, actually convince that person their views are wrong.
 
Mental illness can also be an important factor when involved in a debate with someone who has it - that person will NOT realize there is a problem, due to having mental illness. As long as something works for him or her, they will keep pulling the same tactics. That is the best reason to walk away from a debate IMO, and probably it is a nice boon to be kind too.
 
Interesting>> "...an olive branch of peace.." I'm in a midst of reading a little book titled: Secrets of the Vine; written by Bruce Wilkinson, and the chapter I completed recently spoke of an olive branch (signifying peace)...and then reading your post and seeing that bit of excerpt made it all the more interesting! ;)

Stress factors from carrying on through heated debates surely can wreck havoc by pulling a few farther from the realm of being in a peaceful state of mind...a good suggestion during such times of being deeply involved in a clash of minds/thoughts (simply--a 'hot', controversial debate) is to step away for a time to recollect thoughts and to allow oneself to fall into a state of calmness which then could give in to creating good quality posts/replies rather than to abruptly make a post/reply out of frustration/anger, etc. Make sense? Yes, it sure can be harder to 'pull' away for a time being...but the 'will' to do so is well worth it! ;)

Also, like Liza pointed out, there may be a case where someone might have such a condition and not be aware of having such a condition...otherwise, it's more of a person closely or seeming to have such a condition aforementioned in Liza's post can simply be a 'bigot' or 'redneck', etc. who thrives on irking others without any ramifications for feelings of others.

Lastly, it does take incredible amount of willpower to admit what you have done so and I do applaud you for doing so--I do hope you'll be able to maintain peace within yourself and you'll feel more relaxed, capable of facing head-on any debate....

Now, as for me, heading back to that part I'm reading...'the olive branch of peace'. :)
 
cental34, :hug:


First I would like to say, I didn't expected an apology from you, Because really there isn't any tension that I felt based on how you posted, I really enjoyed reading your posts, your point of views and opinions as well. I learned a lot by you.

I've gotten quite into few debates myself with members, After looking back on my posts, I could have said one or two and move out of the debate threads, But sometimes I don't and sometimes I do. :Oops: But, Hey nobody is perfect right? :mrgreen:

It takes a lot to come here and make a public apologizing. I admire you for that. You're good person and you know that. :thumb:
 
Having a mental condition may be my problem. I do have a tendency to think I am absolutely right on something, and refuse to admit my fault. I've shown this in some of my debates with people in here. Its frustrating for me to try to keep arguing. And to be honest, the only difference between debate and arguing is civility, and I am not always civil about it. Part of me doesn't want to participate in anymore debates, and part of me does, simply for the intellectual discussion of it. More often that not, it leads to me insulting someone. And as the verse says "blessed are the peacemakers, they will be called Sons of God." Jay Bakker had a particularly long part of his sermon dedicated to this, and so he really helped me to understand that being a peacemaker applies to every part of life. Now, if I can control myself and remain civilized, I'll be more than happy to participate in more discussions. Like RoadRunner said, it is good to take some time away, cool down, then come back with a level head. And alot of time it is hard, especially when dealing with many of the bold, pretentious statements from people like ravensteve.
 
cental34 said:
RoadRunner said, it is good to take some time away, cool down, then come back with a level head.
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I've done it many times, left for a while and came back. It doesn't help as much because once you come back, same old shit is still here. :giggle:

Sure, It's up to us if we want to change based on how we post. But, we can't change others, They have to be the ones that wants to change. :ily:
 
Wow, I wish there were more members like you Cental34 :hug:...It takes alot of guts to come forward and apologize for your mistakes...I have my own fault in this too, and there are times I get very frustrated in a heated debates and I do go a bit too far on some members here, which I don't mean to do that, it just that sometimes the topic can be a bit senstive for me to handle...

I don't go in debates as often as I did in the past, when I want to say something, I either say it once or twice then leave the thread and not to post back in there again.....It helps to get away from something that making me really frustrated or mad...

Roadrunner is correct, taking a few days away from the computer does help, cause it works for me! ;)
 
Central34,

Least there's nobody perfect lives on earth... What issues you brings all talk about debates or else topic.. Isn't part of contuine debate. Just their own opnions againist yours... Don't let them think you're wrong... Probably they are wrong too by the way whoever person refused shown full true color totally mistake and not even shown their skin front of you...

I'm part of mistake too and also nobody perfect.. Rest of my bottom heart goes out for Jesus always.. Talks about God.. I believe there's afterlife goes to Heaven w/Jesus.. Yes.. of course I do.. I don't give them crap think I'm cuckoo or wha..ever.. Probably They doesn't want hear all about "God stuff" and all they want contuine debate.. Which it's useless...

as well said Liza and Roadrunner's comment.. Totally brefitly correct!
 
Bullym0m said:
Central34,

Least there's nobody perfect lives on earth... What issues you brings all talk about debates or else topic.. Isn't part of contuine debate. Just their own opnions againist yours... Don't let them think you're wrong... Probably they are wrong too by the way whoever person refused shown full true color totally mistake and not even shown their skin front of you...

I'm part of mistake too and also nobody perfect.. Rest of my bottom heart goes out for Jesus always.. Talks about God.. I believe there's afterlife goes to Heaven w/Jesus.. Yes.. of course I do.. I don't give them crap think I'm cuckoo or wha..ever.. Probably They doesn't want hear all about "God stuff" and all they want contuine debate.. Which it's useless...

as well said Liza and Roadrunner's comment.. Totally brefitly correct!
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Its not that they make me think I'm wrong. As I said, my convictions remain the same, and my ego will always make me think I'm right. Its just that let myself argue it to the point where its not about debate, its about trying to make myself feel good, and out of spite for those people who disagree with me. In the same sermon Jay Bakker put it like this "Go and make peace, even if you know you're right. 9 times out of 10, the other person will even admit they were wrong."
 
We all learn something here. We need to grow, understand, and work out the difference between us all here.

You are our teacher and we all are your teacher. We learn something from each other and learn to be tolerance with each other. At the same time you are learning about yourself as I do each time I post here to get know myself little bit daily.
Your are your own teacher. That is what count.


Remember without those things, we never got a chance to know oursleves.
 
Exactly. We learn something new from everyone, whether it is something stated by their statements, or an inference made about that person through their sentiments or opinions.
 
cental, I doubt you have mental illness since you pretty much know there's something wrong unlike a person with mental illness. The difference between stress and having mental illness is the ability to know if there is a problem. Maybe you try too hard to get approval? As you have described it, it sounds like you might have a problem with arrogance.. it is a part of seeking approval, and self confidence doesn't need that. You know you're right, no problem.. but why the need to take it further to prove yourself more?

I'm not an expert, just read stuff about this somewhere.. you can read more about it at: http://www.bullyonline.org/stress/ptsd.htm#Breakdown

Maybe it's from one too many belligerent interactions from others on the job that you're expressing all this anger and need in this forum somehow?

It's wrong of others to treat you like that on the job, IMO - deaf or hearing. You're human, too. You're always welcome here, and I am glad you added your unique consciousness to this pool of many unique consciousnesses!
 
PS Cental, I've been quilty of being arrogant in the past too :D :Oops: It was part of seeking approval.. which wasn't a very good way to get it. That's why I added that explanation about arrogance. I could be wrong, too. That's okay, too. :) Everyone else is right, taking a few days to yourself is good idea.. I do it whenever I think it is needed for myself.
 
Liza said:
cental, I doubt you have mental illness since you pretty much know there's something wrong unlike a person with mental illness. The difference between stress and having mental illness is the ability to know if there is a problem. Maybe you try too hard to get approval? As you have described it, it sounds like you might have a problem with arrogance.. it is a part of seeking approval, and self confidence doesn't need that. You know you're right, no problem.. but why the need to take it further to prove yourself more?

I'm not an expert, just read stuff about this somewhere.. you can read more about it at: http://www.bullyonline.org/stress/ptsd.htm#Breakdown

Maybe it's from one too many belligerent interactions from others on the job that you're expressing all this anger and need in this forum somehow?

It's wrong of others to treat you like that on the job, IMO - deaf or hearing. You're human, too. You're always welcome here, and I am glad you added your unique consciousness to this pool of many unique consciousnesses!
Click to expand...

Exactly there is no need to take it further to prove myself, and that is my problem. I take it to a personal level.

I never really considered stress from my job a factor though. Lately it has became more and more stressful for me. Primarily, from scams, pranks, and people who are just stubborn when I try to explain what is going on to them. We're supposed to be able to vent with a supervisor if we need to, but I never felt like I could trust them. I've always heard stories of people opening up, and then being backstabbed.

Or maybe it's just my nature.
 
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