You Have to Be Hard of Hearing to Understand

I definitely agree with this!

I feel like I'm trapped between two worlds. :(
 
Hard of Hearing people dont fit in anywhere, we are the most discriminated against of all. The deaf dont consider us deaf and the hearing consider us either hearing or frauds, "fake deaf" as one guy called me the other day.
 
jasin said:
Hard of Hearing people dont fit in anywhere, we are the most discriminated against of all. The deaf dont consider us deaf and the hearing consider us either hearing or frauds, "fake deaf" as one guy called me the other day.
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I am profoundly deaf and dont really fit in anywhere either cuz I am not ASL enough and I cant understand about 80% of conversations in the hearing world. I have been accused of being "fake deaf" cuz I can speak well. Matter of fact, that situation happened today at the mall.

I went to the mall to meet my friend this afternoon so our kids can play in the kids' area. My friend and I were chatting in sign language and a group of middle aged kids kept staring at us (nothing new). My friend waved at them and acted like she knew them..I was like huh? I thought she did know them but realized she was being scarcastic so those kids asked us if we were using sign language. Shows that they are interested so we started chatting with them answering their questions. My friend can speak well..maybe better than me and one kid was like "U are not deaf! " I was like "yea, I am deaf." Kid goes "You can talk well so you are playing a joke on us, right?" I showed them my hearing aid and they were like, "U must be hard of hearing but not deaf." At that point I just laughed and said "If u say so..yea I am hard of hearing." My dB level is 120 and my friend is like at 95 dB level but said we were faking it. Ok, fine whatever u say. :dunno:
 
jasin said:
Hard of Hearing people dont fit in anywhere, we are the most discriminated against of all. The deaf dont consider us deaf and the hearing consider us either hearing or frauds, "fake deaf" as one guy called me the other day.
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A "guy" huh?:ugh3: I presume a member of the male sex? I would tell "him" that he is a counterfeit guy or male, and, when he protests, tell him to prove he is male.:nana:
 
What I find is that a lot of people think deaf = no hearing whatsoever. People also think of blind as see nothing but black. I have learned this to not be the case, but for young people, life will teach them this. It is hard to be patient sometimes.
shel90 said:
I am profoundly deaf and dont really fit in anywhere either cuz I am not ASL enough and I cant understand about 80% of conversations in the hearing world. I have been accused of being "fake deaf" cuz I can speak well. Matter of fact, that situation happened today at the mall.

I went to the mall to meet my friend this afternoon so our kids can play in the kids' area. My friend and I were chatting in sign language and a group of middle aged kids kept staring at us (nothing new). My friend waved at them and acted like she knew them..I was like huh? I thought she did know them but realized she was being scarcastic so those kids asked us if we were using sign language. Shows that they are interested so we started chatting with them answering their questions. My friend can speak well..maybe better than me and one kid was like "U are not deaf! " I was like "yea, I am deaf." Kid goes "You can talk well so you are playing a joke on us, right?" I showed them my hearing aid and they were like, "U must be hard of hearing but not deaf." At that point I just laughed and said "If u say so..yea I am hard of hearing." My dB level is 120 and my friend is like at 95 dB level but said we were faking it. Ok, fine whatever u say. :dunno:
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VamPyroX said:
I definitely agree with this!

I feel like I'm trapped between two worlds. :(
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Actually I wouldn't say you are trapped between two worlds, you have a balance either take the one side if not go on the other side.. I know what you are saying as I'm HOH all my life... I just got to the point in hearing world don't have a clue what HOH really means and also some don't believe I'm HOH but hearing... so I just basically say I'm Deaf so that they can see that Deaf can do anything probably much better than some hearing. Just be thankful you have the best of both worlds.. as like what my mom say since she's deaf since 4 years old from german measles but doesn't have clue about deaf culture.. So I'm pretty lucky whatever my moods strikes which end I want to be in depending on the circumstances or events whatever.. smile keep your chin up as it's not a perfect world.. smile

 
shel90 said:
I am profoundly deaf and dont really fit in anywhere either cuz I am not ASL enough and I cant understand about 80% of conversations in the hearing world. I have been accused of being "fake deaf" cuz I can speak well. Matter of fact, that situation happened today at the mall.

I went to the mall to meet my friend this afternoon so our kids can play in the kids' area. My friend and I were chatting in sign language and a group of middle aged kids kept staring at us (nothing new). My friend waved at them and acted like she knew them..I was like huh? I thought she did know them but realized she was being scarcastic so those kids asked us if we were using sign language. Shows that they are interested so we started chatting with them answering their questions. My friend can speak well..maybe better than me and one kid was like "U are not deaf! " I was like "yea, I am deaf." Kid goes "You can talk well so you are playing a joke on us, right?" I showed them my hearing aid and they were like, "U must be hard of hearing but not deaf." At that point I just laughed and said "If u say so..yea I am hard of hearing." My dB level is 120 and my friend is like at 95 dB level but said we were faking it. Ok, fine whatever u say. :dunno:
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Hehehehe I have the same problem as you even sometimes at work or at a bar even lol... I let them find out themselves... as many people don't realizes there's many many different deafness and ability..ONce they knew sometimes they'll take off fast or sometime they will stick around it... I DO believe we always will have to EDUCATE whomever we bump into..
 
pek1 said:
A "guy" huh?:ugh3: I presume a member of the male sex? I would tell "him" that he is a counterfeit guy or male, and, when he protests, tell him to prove he is male.:nana:
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You women say some pretty discriminatory stuff too, a lady in my asl class refered to me as the same that guy did just not in those specific words. I dont think being discriminated against has anything to do with gender, people off all backgrounds have discriminated against the deaf and hard of hearing,
 
jasin said:
Hard of Hearing people dont fit in anywhere, we are the most discriminated against of all. The deaf dont consider us deaf and the hearing consider us either hearing or frauds, "fake deaf" as one guy called me the other day.
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I know what you mean. I am h/h also and I always feel like I'm in a "twilight zone" between the two worlds because I am not "deaf enough" to be deaf or "hearing enough" to be hearing. I can hear and speak well enough to work as a Window Clerk at the Post Office but there are still times when I have trouble communicating with customers and I do the best I can. Funny thing is that I was raised in the "deaf culture" in a residential school for the deaf. ASL is my primary language and spoken English is my "second" language.

Just wanted you to know that u are not alone. :h5:
 
Hmm after reading the post to me im HOH and can be deaf if i want to .. there is no sides i take for granted... you just have to choose what you feel comfortable with and if you dont like it .. try a new way of approaching.

Im very fortunate to have both worlds but i prefer hearing as i tend to talk too much but not enough on my signing *shame on me* but thats how i am.
We all have to accept who we are whether deaf or HOH

If hearing dont like HOH or deaf why worry move on and meet new friends who likes HOH.

Same with deaf dont like HOH then find someone who does.

Chin up guys !
 
Hello everyone thank you for your comments about my poem. :) I got this because I was in the Deaf culture class in High school and i read you must be hearing to understand and you must be deaf to understand. I was waiting for Hard of hearing poem nothing so I decide to write the poem You must be Hard of Hearing to understand.

Thank you again for nice comments.
 
Nancy said:
From URL: http://deafness.about.com/od/deafliteratureandfun/a/hohpoem.htm

You Have to Be Hard of Hearing to Understand

From Brian M. Lalonde (1986)

Hard of Hearing People Have Feelings Too

As a teenager, Brian Lalonde wrote the following poem/essay to express how he felt about being hard of hearing: Don’t forget about hard of hearing because we belong to same world too. You never think about us because both worlds think that they are true. Really we belong to both worlds the hearing and the deaf. But when you’re hard of hearing you are always left out. You have to be hard of hearing to understand.

In hearing world people see us with hearing aid and they think we are deaf. But we have some good speech we were brought up in the hearing world.
You have to be hard of hearing to understand.

In the deaf world we use our speech very well and also we sign. They are turned off if they see us speak. No matter, when we sign they think we belong to hearing world. That is not true.
You have to be hard of hearing to understand.

We have been on both sides of the world because we can speak and sign. We can still communicate with two worlds. Many times the hearing has made fun of us because of our hearing aids. Deaf make fun of us because of our good speech.
You have to be hard of hearing to understand.

We feel like we have lost interest in both of the worlds. Many times we miss the hearing’s conversation but they say to us "You are not important." If we miss what the deaf say, they sign "Train gone."
You know how we feel?
You have to be hard of hearing to understand.

Sometimes hearing people see us following a hearing person’s conversation. They say to us "You don’t need an interpreter." We have to tell them many times that we can lip-read most of the time.
You have to be hard of hearing to understand.

We learn to accept the worlds and try to ignore negative things about our speech or sign. We are happy that we can still communication with two worlds.
You have to be hard of hearing to understand.
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Yep! I wholeheartedly agree with this.

I made my own version.





Between Two Worlds

Don’t forget about the hard of hearing — we exist in both worlds, yet belong fully to neither. The hearing world calls us deaf when they see our hearing aids. The Deaf world questions us when they hear our voices. In truth, we straddle both, but are often left out of each.

In the hearing world, our speech makes us “pass,” yet we still miss jokes, whispers, and conversations that race by without us. In the Deaf world, our signing is strong, but our voices make some turn away, as if we are outsiders.

We carry pieces of both, and that is our gift. We can listen, speak, sign, and move between two cultures — yet too often, both sides dismiss us. Hearing people mock the devices that keep us connected. Deaf peers doubt us because our speech is “too good.”

We are not fully accepted anywhere. When we miss the hearing world’s words, we are told, “You’re not important.” When we miss the Deaf world’s signing, we are told, “Train gone.” Can you imagine what that feels like?

And yet — we adapt. We lip-read. We ask. We sign. We speak. We fight to understand and to be understood. We live in the middle ground that few can see.





You don’t know this unless you live it.


You have to be hard of hearing to understand.
 
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