You think I CHOSE to have my son be born only so he could die 3 years later????? Highly offensive.
I didn't know there was anything wrong with my son until the day before he was born and he was born 7 weeks early. I was 24 years old and they did offer me prenatal testing but I had NO reason to think there could be anything wrong because I already had a healthy pregnancy and I was a healthy person. If I had done the prenatal testing there is still no evidence that it would have revealed that my son had problems. When he was born I was told so many things by the doctors. I worked hard and trained every day to be able to bring him home on a ventilator, oxygen, feeding tube, etc. It didn't work out and he died two weeks before his third birthday on October 19th 2010.
You think I regret his life? No I don't. He taught me more than anyone else in this world has ever taught me. He taught me to love harder and live life better. He taught me to appreciate life and those around me.
You think I tortured him by bringing him into this world? No I didn't. I didn't know he was going to have problems just like hearing parents with deaf kids don't know until their babies are born that they are deaf. You deal with what you get and you LOVE your child no matter what.
Given that we know that prenatal testing can sometimes diagnose fetal illnesses, how can you possibly think it isn't your responsibility that you chose not to get testing that very well could have shed light on problems despite doctors and society saying it should be done? It was your choice.
A child is not a lesson for you, or a life experience. A child is a PERSON. And yes, death is suffering for that person, not an experience for you to learn how to be strong.
I'm sorry about what you went through, but I don't think it can ever be right not to accept prenatal testing when you have access to it.