Polite behavior to the Deaf?

[Cheetah]

WS - I think you will find there are exceptions to every rule we could give you. Many here say they do not want someone sneaking up behind them and tapping them on the shoulder. Personally I prefer that to someone standing behind me quietly tapping a foot and whispering my name (yes this did happen). But that's just me. I get so focused on my work that an airplane could fly past my office window and I would not even notice.

Take your time, don't try to learn everything at once. Form some friendships here. You never know.

Oh, and by the way, I too am Tri-Lingual (and tri-cultural).

 

[whatdidyousay!]

WS - I think you will find there are exceptions to every rule we could give you. Many here say they do not want someone sneaking up behind them and tapping them on the shoulder. Personally I prefer that to someone standing behind me quietly tapping a foot and whispering my name (yes this did happen). But that's just me. I get so focused on my work that an airplane could fly past my office window and I would not even notice.

Take your time, don't try to learn everything at once. Form some friendships here. You never know.

Oh, and by the way, I too am Tri-Lingual (and tri-cultural).

I was doing my laundry in the basement and my neighbor came down stairs and I did not hear so she turned the light off for a second to get my attention, she did not want sneak up me. I was OK with this , it sure was better than getting tapped on the shoulder which I hate! I hated being woken up by being tapped on too!

 

[Sunshine]

Oh me too. I instinctively smack when I'm woken by touching. Most people have learnt not to lol.

 

[sallylou]

WS, the reason that I don't like being tapped on the shoulder is because often people come up from behind. I can't hear that person coming up to me. Suddenly, I get touched and it startles me. My hubby finally learned to flash the lights when he came into a room, after I broke quite a few dishes.

 

[whatdidyousay!]

Oh me too. I instinctively smack when I'm woken by touching. Most people have learnt not to lol.

My sister woke me up by tapping in my hand when I was sleeping at her house a few months ago. Man I woke up in a real bad mood! I would rather have the bed shakes on to wake me up.

 

[Sunshine]

Ooh. I hate bed shakes. I like my phone vibrates under my pillow or Dallas rubs my back to wake me up.

 

[KristinaB]

Hubby will rub my back, or I use my alarm clock with bed shaker. As for when I am awake, family will switch on and off the lights once for casual getting my attentions, but multiple times if it's urgent. I also get their attention the same way now. I used to have people tap me on the shoulder, but since my right shoulder is now totally numb, that doesn't always work anymore. If I am in a public setting and it's a family member, they will tug on my shirt or try to step into my visual space and get my attention that way. At my Deaf Club, they just wave their hand and if if doesn't get that person's attention, then someone will tap me and point to the person wanting me. The Deaf Club is also aware of my numb side and know to tap on the left side and not the right.

 

[Smithtr]

reason deaf swearing because rude because insult to because people inappropriate because hurt feeling upset because stop it insult reason language foul language and bash on annoy complaint! It is very behavior speak something reason identify emotion and angry! I Notice it many people language swearing I know

 

[whatdidyousay!]

Ooh. I hate bed shakes. I like my phone vibrates under my pillow or Dallas rubs my back to wake me up.

I mean I would rather have the person shake my bed than tap on me to wake me up. I wake up very easy when my bed is shaked.

 

[Smithtr]

Ooh. I hate bed shakes. I like my phone vibrates under my pillow or Dallas rubs my back to wake me up.

somtimes I have mood because cool because hearing bell on ring cause I am scared anxiety not funny she know my health issue annoy
I think so scared nightmares, they know already my anxiety issues!

I am slept because relax almost to panic attack not politic not fair!

 

[Grummer]

reason deaf swearing because rude because insult to because people inappropriate because hurt feeling upset because stop it insult reason language foul language and bash on annoy complaint! It is very behavior speak something reason identify emotion and angry! I Notice it many people language swearing I know

i love swearing, i couldnt fucking careless what other people thinks, at my deaf club Everyone LOVES swearing, its fun and they are OLD...much older than you

 

[Smithtr]

i love swearing, i couldnt fucking careless what other people thinks, at my deaf club Everyone LOVES swearing, its fun and they are OLD...much older than you

cool I am netural personal you foul language! I guess shrug not my problem



everyone swearing sometimes I Notice it

I am netural, many people act seem swearing I notice gesture expression and lip reading

seems happened bug up insult to people will hurt because numberous!

I am experiences!

 

[rebeccalj]

I wondered this too jillio. I don't get why it's so "fascinating" that we communicate in the only way we can. Nobody seems to find people speaking Farsi that fascinating.

This made me laugh!!!!

 

[BecLak]

WS, the reason that I don't like being tapped on the shoulder is because often people come up from behind. I can't hear that person coming up to me. Suddenly, I get touched and it startles me. My hubby finally learned to flash the lights when he came into a room, after I broke quite a few dishes.

My husband does that to me too, sometimes, it even happened today. I near jumped out of my skin! (btw, I think he is beginning to notice it has an effect on me :p)

 

[BecLak]

cool I am netural personal you foul language! I guess shrug not my problem



everyone swearing sometimes I Notice it

I am netural, many people act seem swearing I notice gesture expression and lip reading

seems happened bug up insult to people will hurt because numberous!

I am experiences!

I'm like you smithtr, I don't tolerate swearing either, but if it is not directed at you or me, we just have to shrug it off. But if you have noticed I won't quote foul language. Each to their own. (We're cool, right Grummer? )

 

[Speedy Hawk]

Same with me some tap to wake me me up. It freaks me out cos it feels like having insect walking on your hand or something freaky. I prefer shake my bed to wake me up like Dad did this morning cos I overslept.

 

[Grummer]

there is a time and place for swearing, i dont do it like 24/7, no way, im just tired had a flu this week, so im a little grouchy as i had to do Everything to keep on top of the household and animals at same time doing post grad studies bit full on. if someone swears alot in places i dont expect i wouldnt be impressed, even shocked. If its in the public bar in town, i'd probably stay away from them thinking they might be on drugs or just in a foul mood but in deaf club Only with the folks i know its just a banter , cracking a laugh or gossiping. I'm actually milder than them, sometimes on purpose id cuss here because i dont want to give a false impression of a goody goody two shoes nor give impression that im naive, or sometime just plainly to emphasise intensity of a situation or explanation, ie if i feel strongly about something, like Lucia , she cusses too, in 'CI/deaf culture debates' she's loud but that's her getting the point across almost as if she's speaking for herself and similar ordinary people, not some self=righteous gits whos was soo successful as a oralist teachers' pet. So, im not as crude as you'd might think, when you read more of my post, at times id play up without going really over the line (learnt that), and i have serious - milder mannered posts too where appropriate. its rare these days, but some folks can be utterly crude and foul without actaully cussing...others can get away with it in Primetime comedy tv stand ups, like Billy Connolly

 

[Grummer]

as for polite behaviour towards deaf like me, when talking to me (my family cant sign so they talk with speech) i get real annoyed when they turn around talk other way while talking/cooking i had to remind them time to time. They are so unaware to which i partly blame mainstream/oralism when i was growing up it give them an impression its ok for ME to try keep up with them, not anymore!, i have to be met too Half way,lke if they use speech, Let me see them (their faces) while verbal communicating to me. My youngest sister is learning to sign but (sic) its cuz of church...rme...not really the 'deaf culture' awareness, put it this way the awareness comes second to her church 'feel sorry for' shit...

 

[StevieMont927]

My Deaf roomie (who has low vision, so she's a bit of an exception in some cases i.e. I can't wave from too far away or she won't see me anyways, or suddenly appear beside her when she's walking) prefers I tap her if she knows I'm around. If not, I use a different method. When I get home I generally flash the lights so she knows I'm here. If she's on her bed I tap the bed or wave, if she's at a table I'll tap the table (sometimes stomp my feet if I feel particularly lazy or am carrying something). The main point with most of these, though is that I know her well. I know how she likes to have her attention gotten. With Deaf people I don't know well, I generally wave. Sometimes I tap, but if they ask me not to I won't.

 

[Lau2046]

My Deaf roomie (who has low vision, so she's a bit of an exception in some cases i.e. I can't wave from too far away or she won't see me anyways, or suddenly appear beside her when she's walking) prefers I tap her if she knows I'm around. If not, I use a different method. When I get home I generally flash the lights so she knows I'm here. If she's on her bed I tap the bed or wave, if she's at a table I'll tap the table (sometimes stomp my feet if I feel particularly lazy or am carrying something). The main point with most of these, though is that I know her well. I know how she likes to have her attention gotten. With Deaf people I don't know well, I generally wave. Sometimes I tap, but if they ask me not to I won't.

There are people overly sensitive in every community, but generally I don't mind if someone rests their hand on my shoulder so I know they're speaking to me. I prefer that to banging on my desk - only because if I'm not expecting it, I might jump out of my skin... However, light tapping, I really don't care - my teachers would do that in my Spanish classes. They knew I often had my hearing aids off during a test to concentrate so it got my attention.... If you're inside, flicking the lights on and off is generally how my deaf teachers did it. It varies, like everything, from person to person.

Laura