Need a little advice

Taylor said:
I'm glad you mentioned the part about being friends with people eager to learn ASL. A friend who is deaf (who has moved away) mentioned to me how big of a difference that made. I had worried that it would be taken the wrong way in trying to learn sign. When I was in radio, I would sometimes get annoyed when a friend would say 'Will you play this song' if it was something outside of our format...I was always worried about asking the deaf to help me learn sign. I'm appreciative that people are accepting and are willing to help a newbie like me learn.

Dawn, while I can't relate to your experience, I can tell you that there are hearing people out there who are eager to learn ASL. Signing is fun to learn, and I have enjoy it more than trying to learn Spanish or other language.
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Heh. Several hearies asked me about that as well. I mean, they are afraid if I will say no when they want to learn how to sign and all.

I regretted that I blowed away two models-in-training when they actually want to learn how to sign... I was thinking that they were making fun of deafies and their sign languages but I found out that they weren't. It is my big loss for not find a way to date them LOL! After that, I no longer blow any hearies whenever they want to ask... The problem is that I grew up in that area where hearies often looked down on deafies as mental retarded people or whatever they think of us... But time changes, more and more actually want to learn how to sign and get involved into our culture and our social lifes.. I once had the hatred toward hearies. I must admit that... it took a long time for me to stop this attitude toward hearies even though I grew up in hearie culture half of my life. Some 'bad' hearies does not mean that all hearies are 'bad'. It is same conception for republicans like you.. you are ok in my book like I am in your book LOL.

Some deafies still have the attitudes toward hearies or reject them. I am fourth generation of deaf family so I really cannot related how deafies who born in majority-hearing families feel about these issues. I know one best pal who is... I can see how frustrated he is with his family as in communication issue. My best pal absolutely love to hang around with me due to my deaf parents & relatives.
 
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Levonian said:
I see your problem. You’re a classic oral deaf person—you don’t quite fit in the Deaf world, and you don’t quite fit in the hearing world either. You’re not alone—only 25% of all deaf people know ASL and can be considered culturally Deaf. The other three fourths are like you—they do not know ASL, do not take an active and participatory interest in the Deaf community, and usually do not even know any other deaf people, unless it’s by happenstance.

It is not an easy situation. My wife was like you before I met her. She does not sign, and she led a very isolated life. She’s only been involved in two other long term relationships in her entire life. Both were relationships with hearing men which ended badly. And this is very, very common amoung oral deaf people.

I think the best advice we can offer you is that you become a culturally Deaf person. You might want to read A Journey into the Deaf-World and The Mask of Benevolence by Harlan Lane. (Now don’t everybody attack me! I know he’s a radical militant with some outdated views!) These books will give you some insight into the issues that being an oral deaf person in a hearing world involves. The simple act of embracing your deafness will open up a whole new world for you.
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To Levonian: You really hit the nail on the head about how isolated I am. I really don't seem to fit in anywhere. I am shy but I think the only reason I am shy is because of my hearing loss. I will check out the books you recommended! Thanks so much! Dawn
 
Thanks!

I want to thank all of you for your good advice. I live in the southcoast area and I don't go to Boston much at all. Just want to let you guys know that I was born with a slight hearing loss that got worse over the years. I am 42 and I can't hear at all anymore. My mother didn't seem to think that I should learn sign language or know other deaf children. So I was brought up in the hearing world which just doesn't cut it for me anymore. I am going to try out some of your ideas and see how that goes for me. I just feel like i'm kind of old to change but I really feel that I have to cuz I can't go on like this anymore. Thanks to all of you for your advice!! :applause:
 
dawn said:
I just feel like i'm kind of old to change
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Hey you are NEVER too old to change!!!

Please do keep in touch with us and let us know how you are faring. We do care :)

:hug:
 
dawn said:
I want to thank all of you for your good advice. I live in the southcoast area and I don't go to Boston much at all. Just want to let you guys know that I was born with a slight hearing loss that got worse over the years. I am 42 and I can't hear at all anymore. My mother didn't seem to think that I should learn sign language or know other deaf children. So I was brought up in the hearing world which just doesn't cut it for me anymore. I am going to try out some of your ideas and see how that goes for me. I just feel like i'm kind of old to change but I really feel that I have to cuz I can't go on like this anymore. Thanks to all of you for your advice!! :applause:
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hey hey!! it is NEVER TOO LATE TO DO ANYTHING!! like my grandparents (now deceased) for instance started classes at local colleges in their 70's to keep them busy and their minds stimulating and they LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT!!

so my point is no one is ever too old to do a lot of things (the reason why i say A LOT instead of saying EVERYTHING cuz of course an 80 yr old person cant go on a rollercoaster!?? if you get the drift!? LOL)

i bet you are feeling scared, nervous and overwhelmed.. but it takes time as it is all new to you... i am sure down the road you will look back and be glad you did it!! smile..
 
zesty said:
hey hey!! it is NEVER TOO LATE TO DO ANYTHING!! like my grandparents (now deceased) for instance started classes at local colleges in their 70's to keep them busy and their minds stimulating and they LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT!!

so my point is no one is ever too old to do a lot of things (the reason why i say A LOT instead of saying EVERYTHING cuz of course an 80 yr old person cant go on a rollercoaster!?? if you get the drift!? LOL)

i bet you are feeling scared, nervous and overwhelmed.. but it takes time as it is all new to you... i am sure down the road you will look back and be glad you did it!! smile..
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well said zesty gurl! :thumb: and i agree! *nodding* in agreement
 
I think I can help..

Hello Dawn. My name is Alison and I think I can help you with your situation. There are many resources out there for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing Community.

This may be a good place to start:
MCDHH-Mass. Commission for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing
http://www.state.ma.us/mcdhh

They can refer you to an organization that is close to where you live, that specifically helps you deal with these things that you are going through. The organization they refer you to will provide peer counseling, skills training and information, to ensure that you do not feel isloated.

I am a hearing person, but I am an outreach advocate for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing Independent Living Program on Cape Cod.

Good Luck!
There are people out there that want to help you achieve the quality of life that you want and deserve.
 
Mass Advocate said:
Hello Dawn. My name is Alison and I think I can help you with your situation. There are many resources out there for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing Community.

This may be a good place to start:
MCDHH-Mass. Commission for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing
http://www.state.ma.us/mcdhh

They can refer you to an organization that is close to where you live, that specifically helps you deal with these things that you are going through. The organization they refer you to will provide peer counseling, skills training and information, to ensure that you do not feel isloated.

I am a hearing person, but I am an outreach advocate for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing Independent Living Program on Cape Cod.

Good Luck!
There are people out there that want to help you achieve the quality of life that you want and deserve.
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Alison, Thank You for the link. I will check the site out. Yesterday I had an appointment with the Mass Rehab Commission, and they gave me some information about learning sign language and perhaps finding some kind of work. I'm a little overwhelmed and nervous about starting something new but I feel this is in my best interest. Thanks again!
 
Does anyone know who this Prophet is? This person has suddenly disappeared from this site.
 
dawn said:
Alison, Thank You for the link. I will check the site out. Yesterday I had an appointment with the Mass Rehab Commission, and they gave me some information about learning sign language and perhaps finding some kind of work. I'm a little overwhelmed and nervous about starting something new but I feel this is in my best interest. Thanks again!
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Im glad I could give you some help. Mass Rehab Comm. will help with education and work. But I also suggest that you ask MRC where the nearest advocacy / independent living center is. I think you will find that the support and couseling that they can provide will help you handle these big changes. They also will make sure that you are provided with information on your rights, funding you may be eligible for and technology assistance. It's ok to be nervous or overwhelmed. That is a natural reaction. But I believe that if you put your mind to it, you can achieve ANYTHING. And you are on the right track.

Good Luck :fingersx:
 
dawn said:
Alison, Thank You for the link. I will check the site out. Yesterday I had an appointment with the Mass Rehab Commission, and they gave me some information about learning sign language and perhaps finding some kind of work. I'm a little overwhelmed and nervous about starting something new but I feel this is in my best interest. Thanks again!
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yea.. i believe that i mentioned in my previous post that you will be nervous and overwhelmed which is very normal.. but you will do just fine!! :)
 
dawn said:
Does anyone know who this Prophet is? This person has suddenly disappeared from this site.
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Maybe he just got dang Raptured.
 
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