Is It True That A Woman Shouldn’t Pursue A Man Or Initiate A Relationship Because He

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GarnetTigerMom

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IS IT TRUE THAT A WOMAN SHOULDN’T PURSUE A MAN OR INITIATE A RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE HE WILL LOSE INTEREST WITHOUT THE CHALLENGE?

A friend of mine told me she read a book that said women should never ask men out, call men , show men they care in the beginning of the relationship or act in an aggressive fashion because it takes away the challenge for a man. What do you think about this advice?
 
GarnetTigerMom said:
IS IT TRUE THAT A WOMAN SHOULDN’T PURSUE A MAN OR INITIATE A RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE HE WILL LOSE INTEREST WITHOUT THE CHALLENGE?

A friend of mine told me she read a book that said women should never ask men out, call men , show men they care in the beginning of the relationship or act in an aggressive fashion because it takes away the challenge for a man. What do you think about this advice?
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Completely rubbish.
 
GarnetTigerMom said:
IS IT TRUE THAT A WOMAN SHOULDN’T PURSUE A MAN OR INITIATE A RELATIONSHIP BECAUSE HE WILL LOSE INTEREST WITHOUT THE CHALLENGE?

A friend of mine told me she read a book that said women should never ask men out, call men , show men they care in the beginning of the relationship or act in an aggressive fashion because it takes away the challenge for a man. What do you think about this advice?
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I think that is outdated advise.
 
It depends..... If you dont want a man that cares about you, then don't pursue a man..... Most women get with guys who don't give a damn, because it's usually the guys that "don't give a damn" that are aggressive. The 'good guys' are usually the ones that are too shy to go up to the woman. So, if you're female, and meet a guy when you're out..... if he hits on you, he's probly only wants one thing. But, if there's a guy you like who seems 'quiet', sure, go up to him, cause he's more likely to be a good guy.

I've always considered myself to be a shy person..... but people who know me tell me don't see me as shy. I think it's because as long as another person 'breaks the ice', then I'm fine. I'm just too shy to 'break' it myself.

I'm pretty sure that very many good guys are like me, while I know for fact that 99.9% of assholes are the ones that will walk right up and hit on you.

I think women are much better off by watching the guy for a bit, and then initiating contact herself. At least then you have more chance of meeting a worthy guy.

I hope my post helps, or at least makes sense.... (I'm still recovering from thanksgiving)

GL
 
That is kinda like saying when a women says "no," she means "yes." It makes no sense. Every guy is different, like every gal.

I say just take that advice and throw it out the window.
 
I would like it if some lady did ask me out. I'm not good at reading people and knowing if they are interested in me or not. Therefore would like it if she did ask me out. I like it when people speak their mind instead of playing games.
 
Good advice, men and thanks for sharing. Maybe it can help many of us women. Many of us think if we pursue a guy, we will come across as too needy and desperate to the guy.
 
Be yourself. If you are an aggressive, outgoing woman then go ahead and ask him out. If you are a shy, quiet person let him ask you. That way your personality is obvious and there won't be any disappointment later. If you are both shy just play the old game of finding excuses (it works) to be near him and if he tries to get away let him go. If he doesn't try to stay away you can get to know each other a little better. Sometimes time with you is all it takes for a man to get brave enough to ask for a date. I'm a little aggressive so I usually just tell the guy if I like something about him and see how he responds.
 
Thanks guys,, your advices will help lot of women in this questions and issue. I would have said an advice for a friend and tell her what i think, I would say:

I THINK IT’S A BUNCH OF BULL!! It’s disrespectful to men. It‘s controlling and manipulative, and demeaning to women. Games are for children, not for grown-ups who want to have healthy, meaningful relationships. The belief that women are so powerless that we somehow need to “trap” a man is sexist, even if it is a woman who espouses this belief. Men aren’t animals to be lured and domesticated. They are human beings with the same vulnerabilities and insecurities women have.
 
SimpleMan said:
It depends..... If you dont want a man that cares about you, then don't pursue a man..... Most women get with guys who don't give a damn, because it's usually the guys that "don't give a damn" that are aggressive. The 'good guys' are usually the ones that are too shy to go up to the woman. So, if you're female, and meet a guy when you're out..... if he hits on you, he's probly only wants one thing. But, if there's a guy you like who seems 'quiet', sure, go up to him, cause he's more likely to be a good guy.

I've always considered myself to be a shy person..... but people who know me tell me don't see me as shy. I think it's because as long as another person 'breaks the ice', then I'm fine. I'm just too shy to 'break' it myself.

I'm pretty sure that very many good guys are like me, while I know for fact that 99.9% of assholes are the ones that will walk right up and hit on you.

I think women are much better off by watching the guy for a bit, and then initiating contact herself. At least then you have more chance of meeting a worthy guy.

I hope my post helps, or at least makes sense.... (I'm still recovering from thanksgiving)

GL
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ah hope you are feeling much better from thanksgiving. :)
 
Whoever wrote this book must be smoking up some banana weeds....
 
i used to ask guys when i was young.. few turned me down. I gave up on asking guys as i was working and have no life. Now years later, I got guys chasing after me! Yikes! HELP!
 
Freaky Cat said:
i used to ask guys when i was young.. few turned me down. I gave up on asking guys as i was working and have no life. Now years later, I got guys chasing after me! Yikes! HELP!
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I guess some men don't like women asking them out must spooked them, I never asked a guy out expect hang out for a cup of coffee to chat. I normally let the guy ask me out. I guess some men do like bold women that ask them out for a date. Strange huh?
 
i dunno.. but still its weird.. jeez.. haha.. thats why i stopped asking them out.. let them ask me out.. :)
 
Freaky Cat said:
i dunno.. but still its weird.. jeez.. haha.. thats why i stopped asking them out.. let them ask me out.. :)
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Good idea, it always best to let the guy ask a girl out on date instead of the woman asking a guy out, lol I have seen some women ask a guy out got bold move on the guy. I gues some men are still "shy" half the time they like girl and try hard to ask her out without getting too nervous or wet sweaty palms hands! lol
 
GarnetTigerMom said:
Good idea, it always best to let the guy ask a girl out on date instead of the woman asking a guy out, lol I have seen some women ask a guy out got bold move on the guy. I gues some men are still "shy" half the time they like girl and try hard to ask her out without getting too nervous or wet sweaty palms hands! lol
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haha yeah....
 
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