Does Virginity Matter?

backerman

backerman

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I know the AllDeaf community here is pretty well mixed in ages, but it seems predominantly to be teenagers here. Right at the age where hormones run wild and sexual activity is becoming more and more the norm. Hollywood has almost put an emphasis on losing your virginity in high school with just about any teen movie made; American Pies series and most every TV drama. And the porn industry has never been more popular or accepted. But then we have also seen the counteracts. Whether true or not, people like Britney Spears and Jessica Simpson claiming to be virgins as it was almost the fad of the day. There does seem to be a rise in abstinence awareness programs, especially in high schools.

Even Outside the 'Religous' circles, people are finding it more rewarding to wait until Marriage. They hold onto it like a precious jewel of sorts, only wanting to give it to the person they marry. And of course, there are those who treat it like a hot-potatoe and get rid of it a quickly as possible. Whether it be for social acceptance with thier peers, or just personal satisfaction.

What are your thoughts on Virginity? Does it hold something special in your life, or it is just a label you don't want?
 
for me, i feel that virginity should be broken with someone you really loved to make a relationship really special..

I am stil la virgin :Oops: but i dont care because i am waiting for a special person to come in my life before i break my virgin, i don't want to just pick someone and ask them to break my virgin, it not special that way, breaking your virgin should be special.
 
Personally, as much as I like some of these teen movies but I think they put way too much emphasis on sex. The average age of a girl losing her virginity in U.S is 12 and a guy 13. It's too young, too soon, and not enough people know what the hell they're doing. Too many girls are getting pregnant and vanireal diseases are rampant among teenagers.

In my opinion, people need to hold out on sex, at least till 16/17. Earlier then that is way too young, and they should also know the risks.

I lost my virginity when I'm 19.
 
ohh yah i agree with ya, they are way too young to be having sex...
Sure teen movies are ok for me but too much sex is not right, many teens dun get the difference beween reality and fiction. Many teens think that if they see sex on tv that means it ok for them to have sex.. same for violence and murders. Those young teens needs to understand the consquences and the reality of having sex. I bet ya 12, 13, 14 years old kids don't even know that even having sex for the first time is still a risk for STD, AIDS, and even pregnancy. I have a friend who knows someone from her dorm at school, well that girl from her dorm is only 14 yrs old, and believe me her attitude and behaviour is not 14 years old, and she was having sex with a boy who is 15. I couldn';t believe it cuz that girl was not ready at all! it piss me off to see young teens just going with it without thinking of the consquences and reality of real life etc..

Also parents should be able to be more involved in that kind of stuff, not insest! but ok 2 example.. that girl i was talking about above, went over to her boyfriend house and while her parents were home, they even suggested that the girl sleep in the boy;s room on the bed while the boy sleep on the floor.. HELLO!!! what the hell was the parent thinking? Anotehr example, a friend of mine, when her boyfriend went over her house for a weekend or whatever, her parent doesnt even care where the boy sleep. SO they end up sleeping together, which will lead to sex obviously.. I know that the parent wont be able to control the kids much cuz more and more kids rebel now. But if the parents really cares they would do something about it to prevent it..
 
Virgin matters a lot. It involves self-respect and respecting the relationship and many more.

Bottom line you don't want to go through many tragic emotional after you broke your virgin to someone and the someone left you because he want to use you or not looking for serious relationship or made mistake with you.

It is really the parent's job to teach the children about the sexual value. Many parents tends to leave that job to the school and the school took it a very horrible job handling with teaching the kids about sex thing.
 
Yes it matters to wait untill wedding night but my friends keep bug me to lose it. sigh
 
Virginity is quite important. If I ever found out a girl I was dating was not a virgin, it would give me great pause, and I doubt I could respect her after that.

My girlfriend and I are both virgins, and very proud of it!
 
There are times I wish I could go back and be a virgin again. I wish I never broke my virgin until I was married. Right now, I am teaching children not to have sex until you are married. The choice is theirs, not mine. I hope those children will be wise to wait including my children. The TRUST is stronger in relationship if sex on hold until after marriage.

1) TRUST is stronger

2) less chance of getting diseases

3) wont know what sex is like with other partners

4) less chance to have an affair

5) wont be bored with sex, always something new with spouse

etc.

HPV disease is going around and more likely most of us are carrier.
If using condom, HPV will still be passed on to another partner ~~
a) phyical contact ( body to body, leg to leg, etc)
b) can go through some condom

If I go back in my time, I will not break my virgin until I was married.
 
I so see too many kids who are socially immature doing it.....like a lot of girls who think that if they don't have sex, guys won't like them.....and too many people who don't understand the complexities of a relationship, having sex.
I know too that a lot of the sexual activity is pedophilistic......I know I read someplace that a significent number of teen pregnanies are fathered by older guys.....like those twentysomething creeps who still hang out exclusively with high schoolers! UGH!
 
Of course it matters! For some it does and for others it doesn't. lol...don't mind me....just passing thru....
 
backerman said:
Personally, as much as I like some of these teen movies but I think they put way too much emphasis on sex. The average age of a girl losing her virginity in U.S is 12 and a guy 13. It's too young, too soon, and not enough people know what the hell they're doing. Too many girls are getting pregnant and vanireal diseases are rampant among teenagers.

In my opinion, people need to hold out on sex, at least till 16/17. Earlier then that is way too young, and they should also know the risks.

I lost my virginity when I'm 19.
Click to expand...

carelessness can result ended up pregnant when you are 12 or 13 yrs old. That what you get for unprotected sex without a condom. By the way...I lost my virginity when I was 19 yrs old.
 
i definitely think one's virginity is a big deal. I'm 18 goin on 19 and I'm still a virgin, and my boyfriend is too. We're waiting until we get married. :)

:naughty:
 
Im 20 in one month time and Im a virgin, Im saving it for that special someone. It shocks me when I see that very young kids are having sex, I just think whats the rush, but it is due to peer pressure
 
Raging Quiet said:
Im 20 in one month time and Im a virgin, Im saving it for that special someone. It shocks me when I see that very young kids are having sex, I just think whats the rush, but it is due to peer pressure
Click to expand...

You're right. Peer pressure would be the main reason that adolescents choose to start having sex so young.

As for me - I have mixed feelings on virginity for some quite personal reasons. You may PM me if you wish me to clarify this.

All I can honestly say on this topic is - you set your own time and pace for that sort of thing. YOU decide when you're ready, and do NOT allow others to influence your decision on when you are ready to lose your virginity. And, for the love of Merlin, do ensure that you are with someone you cherish dearly, and this person loves and respects you in the same manner. Sex isn't something to be rushed into, whether it matters to you whether or not you're still a virgin.
 
Here are some links you all can learn from:

http://www.io.com/~wwwomen/sexuality/virginity.html

http://www.pamf.org/teen/sex/virginity/

this one is about restoring virginity by repairing hymen eh; http://www.ocf.berkeley.edu/~issues/fall98/hymenrep.html

Catholic Encyclopedia on Virginity; http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/15458a.htm

Islam on virginity: http://www.islamset.com/bioethics/obstet/virgin.html (they says horse riding can make hymen torn is false while american says this can occur.. so you girls, can you confirm that if you play sports or ride horse or whatever without having intercourse actually get your hymen torn? )

There's virginity testing going on elsewhere in other part of earth; http://www.webster.edu/~woolflm/virginitytest.html

now Wikipedia is my favorite online site to look up: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virginity

You know, in one of the link I provided above says you can be virgin again if you abstain from sex for long period of time eh..

Well Cheers!
 
I put more emphasis on self-respect than I do on virginity. I see it as only a physical thing that was used as commodity in the olden times to forge unions between two families that would benefit from it, regardless of the maiden's feelings. It does not make an individual better than another individual in any way.

However, I don't support the idea of kids having sexual intercourse voluntarily of their own choice. Let them be kids until their bodies and minds are fully developed to take on the extra health & reproductive responsibility later.

Just remember that virginity can also be taken involuntarily, unfortunately!

See, that is why we all must not fall to that faulty thinking that virginity defines the person and her/his morals. A human being is made of much more than that. It's called integrity of all what that human being stands for.

So, no, virginity does not matter in my humble opinion... where other things have to come first for you. Like honoring yourself and what you stand for today. Stay a virgin until marriage.. more power to you, and say no to peer pressure! Some have the perspective of premarital sex and they are okay with it, so still more power to them all the same.
 
I believe it should be broken with someone you will marry, or are married to. I knew my boyfriend was the one when we met... I went for it... and eight years later we are stronger than ever... I feel as though God gave me the approval, because I *knew* he was the one the moment I saw him.

As for the pressure thing, it totally sucks... My bf felt like he shouldnt be a virgin anymore, at sixteen, so he slept with four people in a matter of five months, just to "be a man" like his friends pressured him to be. It still hurts when I think about it.

katt.
 
Yeah, I feel the same thing that what posters said from above... Virginity does matter to me. Sure, it is pretty normal to be religiously expected for me, but it seems to be more accepted if someone is a non-virgin now than how it'd once was. They already look down on virgins and considered them as a depressing people whose not have lost their virginity yet. Because the subject is "sex before marriage is completely justified and nothing else". The information result is that marriage is much more fragile and much less value in their eyes, due to both of the divorce and society have defiled the whole meaning of marriage in their eyes.

Again, it's my opinion. :)
 
interesting... I am not a virgin and I think it's not a big deal. I don't think kids as young as 12 years old should be doing it. I think an appropriate age for losing virginity is college year... which I did. Having sex during high school or younger is very risky and complicated - it hurts people (family members, jealous friends, etc.)... way too much drama and kids should be studying, not drama'ing.

If you want to lose it - lose it during your college year! At least you're far away from people you know thus less drama, less peer pressure, less etc.. and you're more informed about the risk and STDs. or maybe better - lose it during your honeymoon.

but you know what? this whole concept virginity is fascinating. It's ironic that the "world" or "society" expect women to be virgins and the men's virginity status is of no importance. Women have a long way to go to be on same level as men in terms of society's attitude toward to virginity because feminism just started only a memory ago.
 
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