Divorce parent with children/Single parent with children

Tamara said:
Good thread to talk about.

My divorced friend has 3 kids from her previous relationship, and her new partner accept them to live together, and they produced two more children of their own.

But, my friend said her partner treat her three children different from their two kids together because he won't pay for their upbringing, he always remind her to tell their biologicial father to pay not him, it put strain in their relationship. (Her ex husband don't pay for their 3 kids upbringing)

She know and play the trick, if she want something like say a new kitten for her elder daughter, so she cover it up and said to her partner that their younger child want a kitten, he accept because the child belongs to him, he would definetly say NO if his step-daughter want it in first place!!

Other friend has a son from ex-husband, and she married to a single man who has no children, he accept her son and he took his surname and treat him like his own, until their divorce in 10 year's time, he drop him dead, he don't want to get involved at all which is sad.
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*nodding sadly* I would not accept man who treat my children different as his own children. I would not make babies with that man who insisted that he has nothing do with my children because they are not his... I would consider him as heartless man and then let him go because the children are innoncent... :(

It's unfair for a lady to play "trick" on her partner to get kitten because the children will learn her example... which it's no good.
 
Well i had a son, and a real father hasn't been there. So, I'm not going to battle it cuz that shown who he is. Son need to see that which i can't protect him forever. But he don't know whos real father anyway. He was too little. My boyfriend take over being father for him. Which, he caring alots abt him and my son is really loyal and look up my boyfriend which is a good father role for him. Actually, my bf has stepdaughter, and my bf is only joint of custody of her, and seen her 2 weekends of a month. Stepdaughter isn't in a good place with a hyigene, and we always been concerns and always have a good at our home with good hyigene. We always wondered what heck stepdaughter's mother do with child support. She always complained and wanted us to buy her all new clothes. My bf said child supports all that are for! It very disappointment and make us concern all the time. We re ALWAYS supports our kids whenever we can, to make sure they re happy, good hyigenes, enough to be attention, and discplines.
 
I did married to my exh who have 5 kids from the 2 previous marriages. I accepted them but only one of the kids dont accept me at all cuz he wanted his father an attention but his father chose to ignore him. :pissed:

So now I am divorced 4 yrs ago and happily single where I am at. I did date a guy *deaf* last year for a few months. He claimed that if problem with my son then I would take care of it but he ended up yelling at him and controlling him. I had to get in between them and started telling my exb to back off. He told me that I should be on his side. Duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh He is my kid not your. He does have kids from the previous relationship but never see them. That is so sad no wonder he doesnt know how to handle kids. Beside my son dont like him cuz my exb treated me like a salve.
 
Hi everybody.
What im interested in, if any of you had problems with theirs ex's.
Mine for example, dsnt want to leave at all.We have been divorced for few mnth, but he still comming everyday.I think, he just dsnt want me to meet anyone else, even the fact that im not with him any more. Im, confused.?
 
Cheri, I can relate to you. I went through that while being a divorced mom for six years. But that helped me weed them out - who needs them anyway if they have a problem with that?

I did have a problem with dating a man who never had kids because I dont want to have more kids or have to explain as he never had any experiences with raising kids. I did met many men who said they didnt mind not having kids and stay with me but I didnt want that because it is not fair - they could change their mind eventually and want kids afterall.

My fiance has 3 boys so it works out perfectly for us :applause: I dont have to deal with this issue anymore but I surely can relate to this as I was in this situation for 6 years while out on dating field.
 
My mother raised me alone (I am the only child), no father around in my whole life. She had a bf for a short time. She let her bf to belt me if I did something bad. I was like he wasn't my father, and why did he had to do it? My mother told me to call him "Dad" I felt so awkward. I did call once and didn't like it. He didn't like it either. After they broke up, my mom didn't have a time to find a bf. She kept focus on me till I became independent at age 17.
 
Cheri said:
Oh, I'm not looking for anyone, I create this thread because of what Heath said few days ago. ;)
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oh, yea,I remmy his post *shakehead* not only him I have seen others, both men and women :aw:
 
Peachy Lady said:
Two of my daughters were adult and other was almost adult by the time I married my current husband Dave. They are living on their own now. Dave has three children and by the time I married him, they were only 7, 2 and 3 years old. From the time Dave showed me picture of his three children, I fell in love with them! From my heart, they're mine as if I've given birth to them. It took his children pretty long time before they warmed up to me, but now they all are VERY close to me and think of me as their mom. I believe that in order to marry someone, if he or she already has children, accept his/her children fully in your life and things will come together eventually, however long it may take. If not accept your new spouse's children, then there's going to be HUGE problems because children WILL know that you don't accept them. Dave and I always wanted eight children, so it was very easy for us to accept each others children. We are so blessed to have found each other and I can't imagine ever being apart from him. About Heath's comment that he prefers children from his own blood, it sounds like he doesn't want to deal with his spouse's ex husband or whoever is the father of her children. That's understandable cuz some can give such a HARD time, is very different with houserules, upbringing, etc. But...what if...Heath someday totally, fully fall in love with his true soulmate who has children? What if she is the right one for her?? Dump her just cuz she already had children? hmm He is entitled to his own opinions, so I respect that.
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wait and see if he got own child(ren) and divorce or woman left their kids with him he will beg woman to accept his kids :/
 
Tamara said:
Good thread to talk about.

My divorced friend has 3 kids from her previous relationship, and her new partner accept them to live together, and they produced two more children of their own.

But, my friend said her partner treat her three children different from their two kids together because he won't pay for their upbringing, he always remind her to tell their biologicial father to pay not him, it put strain in their relationship. (Her ex husband don't pay for their 3 kids upbringing)

She know and play the trick, if she want something like say a new kitten for her elder daughter, so she cover it up and said to her partner that their younger child want a kitten, he accept because the child belongs to him, he would definetly say NO if his step-daughter want it in first place!!

Other friend has a son from ex-husband, and she married to a single man who has no children, he accept her son and he took his surname and treat him like his own, until their divorce in 10 year's time, he drop him dead, he don't want to get involved at all which is sad.
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yea, I have seen similar that, I would tell new partner I cant have any more kids what he thinks :dunno:
 
belochka said:
Hi everybody.
What im interested in, if any of you had problems with theirs ex's.
Mine for example, dsnt want to leave at all.We have been divorced for few mnth, but he still comming everyday.I think, he just dsnt want me to meet anyone else, even the fact that im not with him any more. Im, confused.?
Click to expand...

same here with my girls's father keep coming to see our daughters I understand he loves girls much, but its between him and me why should we put girls involved so I allow him to see girls as often as he would like to and do girls love/see their dad, but I hate it when he keep asking have nice new bf? :roll: I have told him I am not looking for bf right now

Now I start to wonder some of u dated with other guy/girl with previous children how was their father/mother treat u?
 
Hi, also if you want the point of view from a Deaf teen that have divorced parents you can contact me.

In most cases YES, the divorce main cause is the current health status of the child, however from my experience ( My parents divorced when I was 3 years old and I was born Deaf), the real cause is not the child but how a parent is willing to support the kid in the future. Let's face it, a parent love their children, and the mother love to their child can be described as unconditional love, it hurts when a parent get the new of their child deafness but let me tell you something, does it hurts more knowing that you did not supported your child when you could? Is never too late and to those parents of Deaf children, your child is smart and healthy, he lack hearing but he does not lack knowlogde, he does not have a learning disorder, he does not have a mental issue, he is in fact normal. Communication is the first step to keep your spouse alert about the situation, and counling does help in some cases but we are not dealing with adult feelings, we are dealing with a CHILD. Do not make your child the EXCUSE of your divorce, he did not have the blame nor the fault, the problem is, we do not see the child and their achievements in the future, we see them as a child and never look up to what that chidl is CAPABLE to do. To all divorced parents that decide tosupport their child, you are a blessing, nor Deaf child will ever be succesfull without family support.
 
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