A Cure

[jillio]

Agree, that is not fair reading of FJ's post which is in no way using the term as is oft used by some that a ci is meant to "fix" a child or a person.
Rick

And you have your own problems in communicating and offending the deaf population. Not the best one to offer advise here.

 

[jillio]

Robot-tweaking??

You bad!!

 

[jillio]

Contrary to your belief, the posters in this thread over the past few days have demonstrated quite civilly their ability to understand the issues being addressed and when asked use their personal experiences to demonstrate a point of discussion.

No one here is advocating anyone method or course of action and quite the opposite have been quite specific in stating that there are many different avenues and paths to follow. Those of us who have mentioned our children's experiences are not stating that what we chose for them is the method or course of action that should be followed by all.

The only thing I will state, is that based primarily on my personal experiences plus to a much lesser extent research I have read over the years, the experiences being shared by myself, FJ and Grendel are not the "few exceptions".
Rick

And you would be the exception to understanding the nature of the discussion.

 

[jillio]

Let them speak for themselves then. You will never know what is the truth about being deaf until you become deaf yourself.

Bingo. I do not know what it is to be deaf. I can only empathize, and I can only do that because I pay attention to and validate what I am told it is like by the deaf population.

 

[jillio]

Jillio, I know that realistically we can't have a world fully customized for every person. But, let's say we're finding that CIs provide a positive outcome for 90% of early-implanted children and that AVT is the dominant methodology in use -- which is pretty close to what's shown by many of the measures in place right now. (Or pick 95%/80%, whatever study you happen to prefer -- the key is "majority."

Even though we are among those with positive outcomes, my family doesn't use AVT -- my child's primary language is ASL and she attends a bi-bi school. Don't your policies -- what works for the majority applies to all, with accommodations made for others -- endanger my daughter's resources, put her into an accommodated group rather than a supported group? AVT may be wonderful, but it's not right for us -- why would we be shoehorned into having to use that methodology because it's now being enforced as "policy".

That is a big what it, and it has not been indicated through preliminary research. There has not been a big enough time lapse for longitudinal. And CI implantation is not available to the majority, so the CI users will always be a minority in the deaf population.

 

[jillio]

Not all deaf people have the same opinions or experiences on being deaf. One doesn't have to be deaf to see or comment on that. All one has to do is look at the mixed responses from deaf people.

Dichotomous thinking. Do you understand the difference between the majority and all?

 

[jillio]

I know I will get reamed for saying this AGAIN but this re-enforces that one size does NOT fit all!! And you are correct. Why should your child or any child not be given access to what works for their particular situation.

Dochotomous thinking. Why should the exception make the rule for the majority? That does not make sense. Let the majority be underserved or served incorrectly while catering to the minority? That is what you are proposing.

 

[rick48]

And you have your own problems in communicating and offending the deaf population. Not the best one to offer advise here.

I'll let others be the judge of that as so far no one other than you has asked me not to share my experiences. As for your other comment, typical and well I think most of knew that this civil discussion would take such a turn once you joined.

Have no fear, I am gone for the weekend and will sharing more than a few brews and even more laughs with some other "evil audists/oralists" but otherwise wonderful parents!

Have a nice day!
Rick

 

[BecLak]

Yes and I do not want to imply that there are none but rather it is not in comparison to those that have been described by those who grew up profoundly deaf, oral and without a ci. There will be struggles no matter what method or course of action is chosen but my child has not experienced anything remote to what Beclak has described she experiences on a daily basis.
Rick

Rick, may I remind you that your child is still a child. When I was young, I went along with everything thinking that I was getting along ok, until I was well into my late teens and early adulthood where I was able to assess my situation for myself that I began to see the struggles that I experienced more clearly and distinctly. Children will always see things with rose-coloured glasses. But what about later down the track??

 

[jillio]

Rick, may I remind you that your child is still a child. When I was young, I went along with everything thinking that I was getting along ok, until I was well into my late teens and early adulthood where I was able to assess my situation for myself that I began to see the struggles that I experienced more clearly and distinctly. Children will always see things with rose-coloured glasses. But what about later down the track??

And children will always accept what ever their parents tell them, because it is the acceptance and approval of their parents that means the most to them. They will accept it even when, instinctively, they know it to be wrong.

 

[jillio]

I'll let others be the judge of that as so far no one other than you has asked me not to share my experiences. As for your other comment, typical and well I think most of knew that this civil discussion would take such a turn once you joined.

Have no fear, I am gone for the weekend and will sharing more than a few brews and even more laughs with some other "evil audists/oralists" but otherwise wonderful parents!

Have a nice day!
Rick

I guess you don't realize that the majority of those on this forum have already made that judgement. And you have a nice day, as well.

 

[BecLak]

Bingo. I do not know what it is to be deaf. I can only empathize, and I can only do that because I pay attention to and validate what I am told it is like by the deaf population.

Therefore, your comments Jillio are highly respected here due to that mutual respect. Thank you.

 

[jillio]

Therefore, your comments Jillio are highly respected here due to that mutual respect. Thank you.

Thank you right back to you!

 

[deafgal001]

I believe Rick's child is an adult now. But he should listen what she have to say about her experience instead of assuming everything is fine and dandy because she have it better than us HA users. She is deaf and need acceptance.

 

[rick48]

Rick, may I remind you that your child is still a child. When I was young, I went along with everything thinking that I was getting along ok, until I was well into my late teens and early adulthood where I was able to assess my situation for myself that I began to see the struggles that I experienced more clearly and distinctly. Children will always see things with rose-coloured glasses. But what about later down the track??

BecLak my daughter is almost 24, in grad school and has been implanted for over 22 years. I am sorry if I did not make that clear but you are new and I have mentioned that several times in the past.

OK Jill, now I am really going so have fun!
Rick

 

[jillio]

I believe Rick's child is an adult now. But he should listen what she have to say about her experience instead of assuming everything is fine and dandy because she have it better than us HA users. She is deaf and need acceptance.

And what she needs the most, as we all as human beings do, is the acceptance, understanding, and validation of those most like her. Other deaf.

 

[jillio]

BecLak my daughter is almost 24, in grad school and has been implanted for over 22 years. I am sorry if I did not make that clear but you are new and I have mentioned that several times in the past.

OK Jill, now I am really going so have fun!
Rick

Thanks, I always do.

 

[Beowulf]

Therefore, your comments Jillio are highly respected here due to that mutual respect. Thank you.

Let me chime in but say that I respect all the hearing people in this thread as well. Even though it doesn't seem like it!

 

[faire_jour]

Wirelessly posted

Bingo. I do not know what it is to be deaf. I can only empathize, and I can only do that because I pay attention to and validate what I am told it is like by the deaf population.

Therefore, your comments Jillio are highly respected here due to that mutual respect. Thank you.

but because i have had a difference experience and met different deaf people who have different opinions, my comments are not valued?

 

[deafgal001]

And what she needs the most, as we all as human beings do, is the acceptance, understanding, and validation of those most like her. Other deaf.

yes.. When I was at the doctor's office, I had my old bodyworn (I paid $150 for all the replacements I needed out of my pocket, btw) ... I nearly dropped it as I didn't have anything to clip it on. I responded "whoa, I don't want to drop it", and they chuckled and says "we don't want you to drop it either!!!" For some reasons, the tone and their reaction bother me. I may be silly but I'm guessing because they wanted to keep communicating with me using spoken language. Sometimes I feel it it bothers people if I'm deaf without any hearing because I get told to turn up my hearing aids, or put on my CI, etc. heck, even my Father in law called and ask how my processor is doing since he heard about my money problem (my son babbled it) . I didn't think it was any of his business because it is MY BODY and I can wear it anytime I feel like it.