ok -- am I overreacting here????
Hi Everyone,
Please let me know if I'm overreacting - I really need to know if my frustration and anger is warranted or if I'm letting my temper get the best of me.
Went in for some tests to try and figure out what is going on with my hearing and balance. During the visit, the doctor called in an ENT who sat and talked to me for quite a while and asked me a lot of questions about my medical past, as well as my family history, sketchy as it might be.
Based on my answers, and the preliminary results of the tests, he said that I might have a condition called neurofibromtosis type 2. From what I understand it is a genetic condition that is characterized by small tumors growing on the nerve that deals with balance and hearing, as well as the spinal column. They're usually slow growing and benign. Basically (again, forgive my limited understanding) the tumors grow and intertwine themselves with the nerves, and press in and effect their ability to transmit signals.
He gave me some literature, and cautioned that the diagnosis is not completely confirmed yet - he had to get a technician to verify the images- and that it would probably be in my best interest to get a separate opinion, just to be safe. He also said that if I had this, it either came from one of my parents, or it was a spontaneous mutation.
Fast forward a few hours, and I'm talking with my mom on the phone, trying to get some constructive feedback, etc. We discuss the various symptoms that I have experienced over the years, and quickly determine that many of them that were previously attributed to other things could be attributed to this as well. I realize that the tentative diagnosis is just that, tentative, but it would explain quite a lot.
Then my mom nonchalantly drops this one on me.
Apparently, my father was diagnosed with NF before he met my mom, and the two of them knew that there was a 50/50 chance that it would be passed along to their children. They made the decision to have children, and not test them for the possibility of the having the condition. Plus, once I started to exhibit some of the symptoms that were similar to ones with the condition they got together and decided not to mention to me that this was a possibility. Their reasoning? Two things - they figured that since my dad really didn't have too much trouble with it, I wouldn't either, and two at my age at the time (late teens early twenties) I was too stubborn to listen to them anyway.
I'm not upset about being born with this condition - if it is what I have. I wouldn't trade my life with all it's ups and downs for anything. But I am angry that my parents decided that it would be better to keep me in the dark to this possibility.
So am I overreacting here? It's the next morning after the conversation with my mom and I'm still seeing red, so to speak.
Laura
