Your thoughts on passage defining victimhood
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Endymion
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Victimhood (which is different from being a victim) exists because the victim has emotional deficits, and victimhood allows them to mask that.
These deficits may not necessarily be a bad statement of underlying character. After all, is it your fault if you grow up in an abusive environment and have deficits as a consequence? I say no, it's not your fault. Unfortunately, when we act on our deficits, we usually represent ourselves in bad ways to others.
For example, I am reminded of Valerie Solanas, the woman who shot Andy Warhol back in the sixties. Solanas had major issues with men, and founded a magazine called SCUM Manifesto (It is believed SCUM is an acronym for "Society for Cutting Up Men"). What she did to Warhol is inexcusable and downright terrifying. But is she an inherently evil person, or does she suffer from psychological and emotional trauma that lead her to do what she did? If her father had not sexually abused her as a child, would she have been a nicer person?
That's what I'm trying to say about emotional deficits. They're not always the fault of the victim.
However, these deficits and victimhood lead to huge problems. We are innately repelled by these acts (like we gasp when we hear of Solanas shooting Warhol), and this complicates the lives of the victims. For the higest quality of life, we should always move forward and acknowledge our experiences. We owe it to our emotional health.
One of my good friends was sexually and physically abused when she was a kid. She turned her life around (after roaming for a while) and at age 23, she completed her graduate degree was admitted into a PhD program. Not everyone can do that, of course, but it goes to show that we all ought to try and improve ourselves and overcome our deficits.
These deficits may not necessarily be a bad statement of underlying character. After all, is it your fault if you grow up in an abusive environment and have deficits as a consequence? I say no, it's not your fault. Unfortunately, when we act on our deficits, we usually represent ourselves in bad ways to others.
For example, I am reminded of Valerie Solanas, the woman who shot Andy Warhol back in the sixties. Solanas had major issues with men, and founded a magazine called SCUM Manifesto (It is believed SCUM is an acronym for "Society for Cutting Up Men"). What she did to Warhol is inexcusable and downright terrifying. But is she an inherently evil person, or does she suffer from psychological and emotional trauma that lead her to do what she did? If her father had not sexually abused her as a child, would she have been a nicer person?
That's what I'm trying to say about emotional deficits. They're not always the fault of the victim.
However, these deficits and victimhood lead to huge problems. We are innately repelled by these acts (like we gasp when we hear of Solanas shooting Warhol), and this complicates the lives of the victims. For the higest quality of life, we should always move forward and acknowledge our experiences. We owe it to our emotional health.
One of my good friends was sexually and physically abused when she was a kid. She turned her life around (after roaming for a while) and at age 23, she completed her graduate degree was admitted into a PhD program. Not everyone can do that, of course, but it goes to show that we all ought to try and improve ourselves and overcome our deficits.
The*Empress
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I think it is a bad idea to use working hard on job and get phD and trying to get rich
Because that victim will become workaholic and use work to keep pain away.
It is better for victims to relax, avoid stress, and seek help.
Because I have 2 college degrees and I was still unhappy. I had an apartment with nice set of furnitures, and car, but still I was so unhappy.
Having material things, doesn't solve problem.
Because that victim will become workaholic and use work to keep pain away.
It is better for victims to relax, avoid stress, and seek help.
Because I have 2 college degrees and I was still unhappy. I had an apartment with nice set of furnitures, and car, but still I was so unhappy.
Having material things, doesn't solve problem.
The*Empress
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I think it is a bad idea to use working hard on job and get phD and trying to get rich
Because that victim will become workaholic and use work to keep pain away.
It is better for victims to relax, avoid stress, and seek help.
Because I have 2 college degrees and I was still unhappy. I had an apartment with nice set of furnitures, and car, but still I was so unhappy.
Having material things, doesn't solve problem.
Because that victim will become workaholic and use work to keep pain away.
It is better for victims to relax, avoid stress, and seek help.
Because I have 2 college degrees and I was still unhappy. I had an apartment with nice set of furnitures, and car, but still I was so unhappy.
Having material things, doesn't solve problem.
It is understandable and normal to be shocked and can't do nothing when you are a victim then start to live again and become more stronger & more smarter, adapt and improvise.
It is all in how you handle and move yourself from a victim to a Survivor and possess the Victor mentality needed to go on with your life. To have a strong mind, body and soul and become a winner in life, in social circles and your job, things like that man!!!
I want to show a very good poster.
Read the scroll. That one says it all.
It is all in how you handle and move yourself from a victim to a Survivor and possess the Victor mentality needed to go on with your life. To have a strong mind, body and soul and become a winner in life, in social circles and your job, things like that man!!!
I want to show a very good poster.
Read the scroll. That one says it all.
Lil_country_gal
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I think it's really hard to be a victim and not relize it i know it's hard to change and survive but it's possible but not through other people just your self kinda like what heath said and heath i love that poster
Liza
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Guys, thanks for your thoughts.
Endymion, by emotional deficits, are you referring to the effects of PTSD? (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - source ) If so, I agree with you that it's not the person's fault. Never is. I want to stress that. PTSD is a very normal reaction to bad situations. Many of you know this already, I am sure!
When I read Reinventing Yourself - I was like whoa! There's a difference between "ownership" and victimhood. Your friend definitely became an owner the moment she decided on changes.
Here's another passage I like very much:
No one can make you change.
No one can stop you from changing.
No one knows how you must change.
Not even you.
Not until you start.
David Viscott from Risking
Endymion, by emotional deficits, are you referring to the effects of PTSD? (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - source ) If so, I agree with you that it's not the person's fault. Never is. I want to stress that. PTSD is a very normal reaction to bad situations. Many of you know this already, I am sure!
When I read Reinventing Yourself - I was like whoa! There's a difference between "ownership" and victimhood. Your friend definitely became an owner the moment she decided on changes.
Here's another passage I like very much:
No one can make you change.
No one can stop you from changing.
No one knows how you must change.
Not even you.
Not until you start.
David Viscott from Risking
The*Empress
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If a victim is disabled or deaf.
If another victim is hearing or normal.
And they both were abused and same sob story.
And they both go same college, both got phD, and then when they both go on
same job interview.
Who do you think the job interviewer will pick most likely?
The job interviewer will pick the normal person of course.
So you can't tell all victims that life is that easy if they take charge in their life.
Can't compare to an ugly person with a yale college degree to a beautiful person with a yale college degree.
Not everybody will have same opportunties fall on their lap.
Not everybody can be like Oprah, who was sexually abused when she was a child.
There will always be one Oprah.
it is like you guys are saying all sexually abused victims will have talk shows just like Oprah.
Oprah has a talk show because she is gifted talk show host, not because she was a victim and not because she is black.
She just happened to meet a rich white male tv producer, and they became friends and he helped her have a talk show.
She is lucky.
If another victim is hearing or normal.
And they both were abused and same sob story.
And they both go same college, both got phD, and then when they both go on
same job interview.
Who do you think the job interviewer will pick most likely?
The job interviewer will pick the normal person of course.
So you can't tell all victims that life is that easy if they take charge in their life.
Can't compare to an ugly person with a yale college degree to a beautiful person with a yale college degree.
Not everybody will have same opportunties fall on their lap.
Not everybody can be like Oprah, who was sexually abused when she was a child.
There will always be one Oprah.
it is like you guys are saying all sexually abused victims will have talk shows just like Oprah.
Oprah has a talk show because she is gifted talk show host, not because she was a victim and not because she is black.
She just happened to meet a rich white male tv producer, and they became friends and he helped her have a talk show.
She is lucky.