Why adults choose CI's for their children

[jillio]

I had had my hearing checked frequently up until that car accident at age 4, and it had remained at about 85 db. The drop to 95-100 was detected immediately after the car accident ... However, I learned something new from Mom when talking to her yesterday. I had previously thought my parents had suspected right off the bat that I was deaf, but Mom corrected me on that and said no, I was closer to 12 months old. That was news to me. She said it was apparent at 12 months that I was not communicating/responding at the same level as my older sister, so that raised a red flag. Up until that point they had thought I was just not paying attention, etc., so now I'm uncertain about whether I was actually born deaf or if this happened in the months following birth.

That would be pretty typcial of congential exposure to CMV. The ages I gave you were approximate. I started to notice some red flags in my son's responses at about 6 months, but I had the advantage of knowing that he had been exposed congenitally, and was on the lookout for signs. If a parent doesn't know, it is natural that they would find other reasons for behaviors, like being distracted, or not paying attention. Especially since, if the parent uses another means to get the child's attention, like touching or walking around to get into their field of vision, the child will respond.

It could be that the car accident triggered additional loss, or it could just be coincidental. There is really no way to know definitively.

 

[Cloggy]

Recently we have unintentionally caused some discomfort to other parents by exposing their children to Drew. After they've met him they begin to wonder what is "wrong" with their kids.

They figure if a deaf kid is out-talking their hearing kid, there must be a problem there. I must admit, it is pretty bizarre.

LOL...
I guess spending so much time with our kids pays off...

 

[Cloggy]

The more I read blogs and talk to other parents of deaf children, the more I see the decision for cochlear implants is not a quick decision. I have never heard the words saying the child is not deaf anymore. I read a good blog from Kim at face me about this topic.

How come hearing aids do not cause as much problems?

Yes, there are so many lies about cochlear implants, just because you know a friend or a friend of a friend does not really give the details. I don't even feel that adults can compare what a child has to go through to learn sound. It is a totally different ballgame.

Often when someone says "My child can hear." it is interpreted as "My child is not deaf"....

Also, it is difficult to define "deaf".

 

[wondermom]

response

Hi and I wish all the best for your daughter. I am a bit puzzled and would also like to offer some advise. I am puzzled because I don't beleive you are a candidate for a CI if HA's are beneficial. Secondly you must make sure that both you and your daughter understand that no all CI's are successful.

She only gets slight sound awareness with her HAs. And I have been researching for months, so yes of course I know that all CI's are not successful.

She has a friend in school who received a CI over the summer, and still refuses to turn it on, she will were it, but leaves it off. So Abriana sees the ups and downs first hand, she has even watched a full surgery, start to finish, and she still wants it. I never encouraged the CI, I never even really spoke with her about it. She brought it up 1.5 years ago on her own. Her teacher(who is deaf) has talked to her about it, along with several other ppl at school, some of witch are against, some neutral, and some for the CI.

 

[shel90]

She only gets slight sound awareness with her HAs. And I have been researching for months, so yes of course I know that all CI's are not successful.

She has a friend in school who received a CI over the summer, and still refuses to turn it on, she will were it, but leaves it off. So Abriana sees the ups and downs first hand, she has even watched a full surgery, start to finish, and she still wants it. I never encouraged the CI, I never even really spoke with her about it. She brought it up 1.5 years ago on her own. Her teacher(who is deaf) has talked to her about it, along with several other ppl at school, some of witch are against, some neutral, and some for the CI.

That's great you are getting informed of all sides even the negative ones. Wish you best of luck in making your decision.

 

[jillio]

That's great you are getting informed of all sides even the negative ones. Wish you best of luck in making your decision.

**nodding agreement** And it is also great that she is involving her daughter in the decision making process.

 

[faire_jour]

All I can say is that I'm happy Miss Kat wasn't born profoundly deaf, so I didn't ever have to face making that decision without being able to see her preferences and asking her opinion on the matter. I am sure it weighs heavier when your child has zero input.

 

[rick48]

All I can say is that I'm happy Miss Kat wasn't born profoundly deaf, so I didn't ever have to face making that decision without being able to see her preferences and asking her opinion on the matter. I am sure it weighs heavier when your child has zero input.

Melissa,

I think as you have experienced, the cochlear implant decision is not an easy one for any parent to make and as each child and each situation is unique there are no universals. You and your husband have made your decision, with whatever involvement from your daughter you deemed appropriate. No one has the right to question or comment upon your decision for it is a decision that is for your daughter and unique to her special set of circumstnaces.

Yes, in a perfect world, it would be nice to have intelligent, rational input from a child, but that is why they are children and we, as parents, have to make decisions for them. Actually, it would also be nicer and easier to have a time machine at your disposal to see if your decision turned out to be a beneficial one for your child.

However, as parents of a child born hearing who suffered a profound hearing loss at the age of ten months and did not benefit at all from hearing ages, my wife and I chose to make a decision for our daughter that was well researched, reasoned and with our child's best interests in our hearts and minds.

Now at 21 our daughter makes her own decisions but the one she has not only never questioned but thanks us for having the courage to make, was the one to give her a cochlear implant.
Rick

 

[rockdrummer]

She only gets slight sound awareness with her HAs. And I have been researching for months, so yes of course I know that all CI's are not successful.

She has a friend in school who received a CI over the summer, and still refuses to turn it on, she will were it, but leaves it off. So Abriana sees the ups and downs first hand, she has even watched a full surgery, start to finish, and she still wants it. I never encouraged the CI, I never even really spoke with her about it. She brought it up 1.5 years ago on her own. Her teacher(who is deaf) has talked to her about it, along with several other ppl at school, some of witch are against, some neutral, and some for the CI.

Sounds like you guys are on top of it. I wish you all the best!

 

[rockdrummer]

Melissa,

I think as you have experienced, the cochlear implant decision is not an easy one for any parent to make and as each child and each situation is unique there are no universals. You and your husband have made your decision, with whatever involvement from your daughter you deemed appropriate. No one has the right to question or comment upon your decision for it is a decision that is for your daughter and unique to her special set of circumstnaces.

Yes, in a perfect world, it would be nice to have intelligent, rational input from a child, but that is why they are children and we, as parents, have to make decisions for them. Actually, it would also be nicer and easier to have a time machine at your disposal to see if your decision turned out to be a beneficial one for your child.

However, as parents of a child born hearing who suffered a profound hearing loss at the age of ten months and did not benefit at all from hearing ages, my wife and I chose to make a decision for our daughter that was well researched, reasoned and with our child's best interests in our hearts and minds.

Now at 21 our daughter makes her own decisions but the one she has not only never questioned but thanks us for having the courage to make, was the one to give her a cochlear implant.
Rick

All very compelling points. Thank you Rick.

 

[rockdrummer]

Also, it is difficult to define "deaf"

How so?

 

[rick48]

All very compelling points. Thank you Rick.

Thanks RD

 

[vallee]

Often when someone says "My child can hear." it is interpreted as "My child is not deaf"....

Also, it is difficult to define "deaf".

I see your point. Let me see if I understand what you are saying. The people the child come in contact with questions if the child is "really deaf" since they interact and can hear something with a CI. Is that what you mean?

 

[vallee]

All I can say is that I'm happy Miss Kat wasn't born profoundly deaf, so I didn't ever have to face making that decision without being able to see her preferences and asking her opinion on the matter. I am sure it weighs heavier when your child has zero input.

Your daughter is a cutie. Can I ask did you get her input with hearing aids? I know both are completely different, whole galaxy different, but did your daughter understand why she wore ha? In my personal experience, my mother discussed it with me at age 10. I understood it at age 10, I don't think I could have understood how important any younger.

 

[Cloggy]

How so?

Try it....
Is "deaf" just "not hearing"?
A child with CI can hear... Is it deaf.?
What makes a child with CI deaf.? Only the fact that at some point in life it was unable to hear.?

(which one of these fits..?)

 

[Cloggy]

I see your point. Let me see if I understand what you are saying. The people the child come in contact with questions if the child is "really deaf" since they interact and can hear something with a CI. Is that what you mean?

The people Lotte comes in contact with don't realise she's deaf. But it's not them I talk about.

Many people on AllDeaf need to emphasise that even though the child can hear, she/he's still deaf. Fine, but in that case.... what's the definition of "deaf"...?

I can say Lotte is deaf based on the the fact that she was not able to hear anything when she was born.
Nowadays, she can hear. In fact, she even hears with her CI's off.!

 

[vallee]

The people Lotte comes in contact with don't realise she's deaf. But it's not them I talk about.

Many people on AllDeaf need to emphasise that even though the child can hear, she/he's still deaf. Fine, but in that case.... what's the definition of "deaf"...?

I can say Lotte is deaf based on the the fact that she was not able to hear anything when she was born.
Nowadays, she can hear. In fact, she even hears with her CI's off.!

That makes sense. I even hear some without my CIs.

I think of myself as deaf even as I wear my CIs. I believe it is a personal definition on how I view myself or Lotte views herself. On personal note, the majority of people around me view me as hard of hearing. When I say I am deaf, they don't see it. They see a contradiction in you hear, you wear CI, how can you be deaf. There personal definition is based on their prior knowledge.

 

[rockdrummer]

When I talk about putting deaf children at risk for language delays, Iam talking about a whole different ballgame. I think many of u misunderstand where Jillo and I r coming from. We aren't discussing teaching strategies. We r talking about deaf children having full access to language, information, communication, and social situations in the educational setting not about teaching strategies in the clasroom. I think that's where the misunderstanding continue to occur.

Do you honestly believe that we are so simple minded that we don't understand that? Accessibility... yes we get it. I don't need a PHD or have to work in the field to understand that. Parents that choose CI for their children want the same thing. The difference is that they want thier child to have accessibility to spoken language. If the CI is successful then they are one step closer to that.

Now, this is not to offend anyone but it is true...how does anyone really know and understand about a speciality field if they have never been trained or worked in it.

Do some research. Read on the topic. And yes listening to people in the field is part of it but as I mentioned, how does one reconcile when people that work in the field are not in agreement?

Sorry hun..that's the truth..before I became I teacher, I thought I knew a lot but after becoming a teacher, I realized I only knew a very tiny part of the biiiiigggg picture. It is the truth and if u don't like it, it won't stop me from being blunt cuz until someone is in that classroom 8 hours a day 5 days a week for years and years, they only understand a small part of it.

That is your experience. That doesn't mean everyone will be the same. Some people have the capacity to educate themselves on a topic and discuss it intelligently without having to actually work in the field. That is not to take away from field experience but AGAIN... how do you reconcile it when people in the field are not in agreement?

Like I said before, teachers who teach hearing children with special needs r much more knowledgeable than I am in that area and I would never claim to know just as much as they do.

Where did anyone ever claim to know as much as somebody else??

..be a teacher ora teacher aide in the field of Deaf ed and then we can debate about it later on. So shoot me.

Really? Do you honestly believe that someone has to be a teacher in the field of deaf ed (an obviously controversial field) to be able to discuss it? You must think we are all a bunch of idiots. Read my points again. How is it that a person should be swayed in one direction or another when the professionals in the field are not in agreement? How do you reconcile that Shel?

I understand your points but when the topic is so controversial its not that simple. One has to learn and to me, the way to do that is research. And yes research does include the real world experiences of teachers and individuals. However, when the research yields varying results it becomes a judgment call.

To complicate matters, there are real world experiences with success (and failure) stories from just about each and every method. How do you reconcile it when teachers, parents and deaf individuals from other methods share the success stories? While I respect your experience and opinions, what would compel someone to listen to one teachers experience over another when they are in disagreement?

I would never suggest that a person whom has done their homework on a subject shouldn't weigh in an opinion. On a topic without a clear consensus, at the end of the day, they are all opinions.

You make it seem like this is a cut and dry non-controversial topic. Well it's not Shel and that is why it's not that simple. Please don't insult our intelligence by implying that we can't have an opinion or discuss or debate on a topic simply because we don't work in the field. I would wager that there are parents that have far more knowledge than you are giving credit for.

 

[rockdrummer]

The people Lotte comes in contact with don't realise she's deaf. But it's not them I talk about.

Many people on AllDeaf need to emphasise that even though the child can hear, she/he's still deaf. Fine, but in that case.... what's the definition of "deaf"...?

I can say Lotte is deaf based on the the fact that she was not able to hear anything when she was born.
Nowadays, she can hear. In fact, she even hears with her CI's off.!

Interesting. I never thought about it that way. I suppose my definition would be;
Deaf=someone that is unable to hear naturally. Someone with a CI is a deaf person that can hear artificially.

 

[shel90]

Do you honestly believe that we are so simple minded that we don't understand that? Accessibility... yes we get it. I don't need a PHD or have to work in the field to understand that. Parents that choose CI for their children want the same thing. The difference is that they want thier child to have accessibility to spoken language. If the CI is successful then they are one step closer to that.

Do some research. Read on the topic. And yes listening to people in the field is part of it but as I mentioned, how does one reconcile when people that work in the field are not in agreement?

That is your experience. That doesn't mean everyone will be the same. Some people have the capacity to educate themselves on a topic and discuss it intelligently without having to actually work in the field. That is not to take away from field experience but AGAIN... how do you reconcile it when people in the field are not in agreement?

Where did anyone ever claim to know as much as somebody else??

Really? Do you honestly believe that someone has to be a teacher in the field of deaf ed (an obviously controversial field) to be able to discuss it? You must think we are all a bunch of idiots. Read my points again. How is it that a person should be swayed in one direction or another when the professionals in the field are not in agreement? How do you reconcile that Shel?


You make it seem like this is a cut and dry non-controversial topic. Well it's not Shel and that is why it's not that simple. Please don't insult our intelligence by implying that we can't have an opinion or discuss or debate on a topic simply because we don't work in the field. I would wager that there are parents that have far more knowledge than you are giving credit for.

Not insulting your intelligence, especially not you.

I dont see how two teachers can disagree about deaf children having the same rights to full access to information.

However, some teachers think by putting a deaf child in the front row of a oral-only classroom would solve all the access issues and as a deaf person, myself growing up oral, I know that it is impossible for a deaf child to have equal access to everything as their hearing classmates do. Even some CI users rely on CART or thru a 3rd person to get the same access to language, information, communication, and education while hearing children do not need to go thru a 3rd person. As for TC...u already read many reports about it about how two languages are usually used stimulately in which one language usually ends up getting compromised so some children may not get a proper language model. Some people who do not understand language acquisition do not realize that.

There are so many issues and honestly, it really takes experience working in different deaf ed programs to see the big picture. If one only has seen one kind of approach and has never seen the others, they may not know what's out there. I have seen almost all of them except for CS so I see the big differences and so far the BiBi approach gives all deaf/hoh children full access to language and communication at all times.

It is the truth. I dont know how else I can put it in. My husband thinks ASL is not really a language but a extension of English since he signs SEE. Until he becomes fluent in ASL, he probably would never understand. Just like I dont understand what it is like to be a Marine even though I know a lot about it. My husband knows more about it because of his personal experience as a Marine. I dont know why anyone would be offended if one doesnt know as much as someone who has personal experience in a field of work just because they dont work in it. Am I an idiot cuz I dont know much about being an airline pilot as much as a pilot him/herself who has years and years of experience on the job? No!

I would never ever call someone an idiot just because they didnt have hands on experience with one particular field of work. As for me being misunderstood, I think that is a valid question. I was just wondering and if I am wrong about that, then just simply correct me.

Never, did I say you were all idiots..it is all about experiencing it first-hand..nothing personal.


Never did I say it was the parents that didnt have any knowledge..